main
side
curve
  1. In Memory of LAJ_FETT: Please share your remembrances and condolences HERE

Saga Dissonant Echoes of a Fragmented Mind (Vader/Ami - AU EpIII) Thank You!

Discussion in 'Fan Fiction- Before, Saga, and Beyond' started by LadyPadme, Oct 26, 2003.

Thread Status:
Not open for further replies.
  1. Darth_Lex

    Darth_Lex Jedi Grand Master star 4

    Registered:
    Nov 17, 2002
    What an ending! :eek: :_| :eek: :_|

    ?Then perhaps we have nothing to say to each other.?
    Haunting... And so easy to imagine Padme saying this to him...

    These whispers had always gone unsubstantiated, but she did not know it was because no one other than she had ever survived any of their interrogations, and so none could tell their tales.
    Eeek! :mad: What a frightening way to give us a glimpse of the new Empire, the terror beyond Padme's tormented soul.

    Only that he has been betrayed by both Padmé and Palpatine. Both knew of this child?s existence and both hid it from him.
    Yes, but for different reasons. And it is that connection that Vader would have to make to be able to turn against Palpatine. Palpatine serves his own purposes to the very end; Padme was protecting Anakin from himself. If only...

    The man she loved sold his soul to the Dark, and is no more.
    How terrible... There are no words... But I like that you wrote her reaction as stoic acceptance, rather than rage. To me that is very true to her character. She accepts her fate bravely - not violently, as Anakin does...

    ?I would have told Anakin,? Padmé whispers.
    Simply beautiful. That's the tragedy of his fall summed up, right there. :(

    And now, he sees a smile of triumph on her face.
    Nothing to say... Really...

    This has been an amazing story. I've loved every post and I'm so sorry to see it end (given that you chose to have Padme die in this scene, though, it really does have to end here). Fantastic characterization and a very creative AU.

    Thanks for a great, if always chilling, ride. ;)
     
  2. TotaleFinsternis

    TotaleFinsternis Jedi Youngling

    Registered:
    Sep 23, 2003
    Damn, that's chilling!! CHiLLinG! Great story, great story!!
     
  3. TKeira_Lea

    TKeira_Lea Jedi Knight star 5

    Registered:
    Oct 10, 2002
    So sad to see it end, but then the finish was worthy of Padme. ;) I always imagined she was indeed a strong enough character to make the ultimate sacrifice? :_|

    ?Anakin,? she says. Her voice is little more than a whisper. Eek! Inner Padme has surfaced. The ?I want to forget,? struck like a blow to the gut.

    ?I don?t know Vader,? she says flatly.

    ?And I don?t know you,? he answers.

    ?Then perhaps we have nothing to say to each other.?


    This exchange was particularly brilliant IMHO because for two people who knew each other so intimately now they are no better than strangers with a shared past.

    Padmé suddenly starts to shiver as she realizes what these instruments are for Ummm ? I was shivering too.

    She retches instead, feeling sweat beading out along her forehead as she tries to calm her visceral reaction. She clutches at her bed sheets and at the tray beside her bedside and knocks the tray over, spilling the instruments and syringes onto the sheets of her bed. I could taste the fear ? well done!

    Only that he has been betrayed by both Padmé and Palpatine. Both knew of this child?s existence and both hid it from him. Yes, but one did it for his own selfish purposes and the other to save your own flesh and blood from the monster you have become. Can I just smack Vader there, please?

    Ok the whole asking for Anakin had me bawling. Just as before when she cried out and was met with only the pain of the lightning, now too she is denied the one thing she wants, safety in her love?s arms. How utterly awful!

    ?Tell us, Padmé,? Vader says. And Padmé fancies she hears a tone of pleading, of desperation in the mechanically modulated voice. But, perhaps that is only a last vestige of wishful thinking. ?Save yourself.? Still clinging to the hope?

    ?Go to hell, Palpatine,? Padmé says. ?Go back to the hell you came from.? And she spits into his eye. That red eye. And she laughs, peal upon peal of insane laughter?it is not melodious and in fact, stirs shivers of fear in its listeners from the wild discordance of its sound. Perfect! :D

    The first jolt of electricity slams into her body, and her muscles all spasm. The power of it sends the needle into her thigh, and sends the plunger home with its load of poison.

    She has no time to cry out or to react. She does not even realize that Vader has now turned on his master, slamming the Emperor?s frail body on the ground, choking him with the Force, with such power that overwhelms the mad old man.

    She merely slumps backward, as her muscles slacken in death.


    Oh man ? really she allows Palpatine the honor of her death. She just waits until he blasts her, knowing what will come. But the horror that Anakin finds himself a moment too late. At least we know that he was there and will find a way out once again when he faces that child of his.

    LadyPadme ? I am in awe of this piece of work. It is by far some of the best I have read on the boards or anywhere else for that matter. Thank you for writing it and sharing it. I bow before you?
     
  4. Laine_Snowtrekker

    Laine_Snowtrekker Jedi Grand Master star 5

    Registered:
    Jul 8, 2003
    GREAT STORY! I liked it. The characterizations were perfect!
     
  5. jacen200015

    jacen200015 Jedi Grand Master star 4

    Registered:
    Jan 11, 2002
  6. jacen200015

    jacen200015 Jedi Grand Master star 4

    Registered:
    Jan 11, 2002
    argh it doesn't want to work!

    now it works. *growls.*

    More!!!
    *chants.* Sequel, sequel, sequel, sequel, sequel, sequel, sequel, sequel, sequel, sequel, sequel, sequel, sequel, sequel, sequel, sequel, sequel, sequel, sequel, sequel, sequel, sequel, sequel, sequel, sequel, sequel, sequel, sequel, sequel, sequel, sequel, sequel, sequel, sequel, PLEASE!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!
     
  7. Jazz_Skywalker

    Jazz_Skywalker Jedi Padawan star 4

    Registered:
    Aug 3, 2002
    Wow, that was an amazing and great (albeit sad) ending. I'll be on the lookout for more of your work!

    JS
     
  8. Gabri_Jade

    Gabri_Jade Fanfic Archive Editor Emeritus star 5 VIP

    Registered:
    Nov 9, 2002
    Simply brilliant, Jieh. Evocative beyond words. I adored every moment of it. :D :D :D
     
  9. Lady-Kenobi

    Lady-Kenobi Jedi Master star 3

    Registered:
    Mar 5, 2003
    How sad! Padme' died an honorable death. WONDERFUL STORY!
     
  10. Dally

    Dally Jedi Master star 4

    Registered:
    Apr 2, 2001
    What an incredible story. So sad, and very powerful. I hope you keep writing! Maybe a happy ending for these two doomed lovers next time...
     
  11. LadyPadme

    LadyPadme Manager Emeritus star 5 VIP - Former Mod/RSA

    Registered:
    Sep 26, 2002

    I really deserve a thwacking for being a bad author. Usually I thank my readers long before this, but DRL is killing me. Also, I wrote out a thank you and before I could post it, my son turned off my computer. He's four so I decided he could live. If he was 14...

    Anyway, so here's a quick thank you to all the kind readers:

    TKeira_Lea
    Viari_Skywalker
    DarthLeia_6669
    Jedi-2B
    LadyZ
    CrystalKenobi
    Sock_of_Darth_Vader
    Gabri_Jade
    Tvdunlop
    Reihla
    Darth_Lex
    Jazz_Skywalker
    Dianethx
    TotaleFinsternis
    Leia_naberrie
    DANA28
    RebelPrincess
    Sara_Kenobi
    Dally
    Kidd
    Julie_marthe
    Laine_snowtrekker
    Jacen200015


    - Thank you all so much for reading. Your support really lets me go on writing. You're the best! [face_love]

    - No plans for a sequel at this point, but then, my muse works in mysterious ways :)

    - Hands out cyber chocolate chip cookies to all. Enjoy!


     
  12. DANA28

    DANA28 Jedi Padawan star 4

    Registered:
    Jan 15, 2002
    My jaw is on the floor!
     
  13. RebelPrincess

    RebelPrincess Jedi Youngling star 2

    Registered:
    Jan 6, 2001
    Wow.
    That was simply amazing. It was beautifully written, mysterious, and CHILLING!!
    I think this is one of my favorite stories now!

    I was on the edge of my seat, especially for the last 2 posts. I think my jaw was on the floor when I reached the end. The ending was so sad, and yet fitting.

    All in all, I absolutely loved it! Another fabulous work! Thanks for writing it, LP!
     
  14. LadyPadme

    LadyPadme Manager Emeritus star 5 VIP - Former Mod/RSA

    Registered:
    Sep 26, 2002


    Just wanted to say thank you to all the kind readers who nominated and voted for this story!

    Best Short Story/Novella - 2004 Winter Fan Fic Awards!


    :D :D :D :D :D
     
  15. LaYa_

    LaYa_ Jedi Knight star 5

    Registered:
    Jul 21, 2003
    Congratulations LP ;)

    I've read this just today *shame on me*

    But this is really great.. and so sad.. Great job ;)
     
  16. Gabri_Jade

    Gabri_Jade Fanfic Archive Editor Emeritus star 5 VIP

    Registered:
    Nov 9, 2002
    Congratulations, Jieh! :D This story deserved it. :D

    *hands evil twin cheesecake with strawberries to celebrate* :D :D :D
     
  17. ViariSkywalker

    ViariSkywalker Kessel Run Hostess Extraordinaire star 4 VIP - Game Host

    Registered:
    Aug 9, 2002
    Congratulations, LP! You certainly deserved it! I loved this story. [face_love]
     
  18. LianaMara

    LianaMara Jedi Grand Master star 4

    Registered:
    Oct 30, 2000
    Congrats, LP! :D

    I didn't find this till you were almost done, so I'll reply now. I loved this. It was so eerie, yet very believable. And the way you wrote Padmé-within-Padmé was excellent. At least she was able to die knowing that they didn't discover her children. Wonderful job! [face_love] *huggles*
     
  19. Vivid_Scripts

    Vivid_Scripts Jedi Master star 4

    Registered:
    Jan 21, 2004
    Wow. I just finished reading all six pages... this story is GREAT! i really loved the way you characterized everyone. The flashbacks were so tragic and sad- very very well done. I also believe that if Anakin had known of the children, he wouldn't have fallen so far for the darkside. I also always thought that Padme was the only person who could really save him from the darkside. It should have been Padme confronting him over the lava pits, not Obi-Wan.

    The ending was very very well done. You did a great job of it although i was kinda hoping for a happy ending... I always knew that Padme was so great and honorable as to sacrifice herself for the well being of her children. The fact that that honor backfires when she kills herself when Vader was going to save her is terribly sad, tragic.

    Huge congrats on your award, you deserve it. I hope to read some more fics from you soon :)
     
  20. darthlauren

    darthlauren Jedi Youngling

    Registered:
    Dec 12, 2003
    WOW!!!!!!!!!!!!!
    I just read that in one sitting and i must say that I am VERY impressed by the story and I feel like I just acomplished reading some great novel in one sitting. Every detail was simply perfect. I LOVED IT!!!!!!! I only wish I could write like that!
    Thank you so much for such a wonderful story
     
  21. vader_incarnate

    vader_incarnate Force Ghost star 4

    Registered:
    Jul 29, 2002
    :_| :_| :_| Stars, just read it all at once ... and I'll get back with more clever comments soon as I'm coherent again ...
     
  22. tvdunlop

    tvdunlop Jedi Youngling star 2

    Registered:
    Aug 15, 2003
    i can't believe i missed so much...this is incredible...i read the rest all in one sitting and my jaw dropped like ten times, everything was so well written, chilling and thrilling......please PM me if/when you start a new story.....i want to sing your praises again.....lol...great job
     
Thread Status:
Not open for further replies.