Before Downfall - Obi/Qui angst: Completed April30/03

Discussion in 'Fan Fiction- Before, Saga, and Beyond' started by Arwen-Jade_Kenobi, Apr 28, 2003.

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  1. Arwen-Jade_Kenobi Jedi Grand Master

    Member Since:
    Feb 9, 2002
    star 5
    Title: Downfall
    Author: Arwen Jade Kenobi
    Genre: angst, drama
    Rating: PG
    Summary: Fear is the mindkiller
    Author?s Notes: Thank you Frank Herbert and George Lucas for the inspiration

    ~*~ Downfall~*~

    I have a bad feeling about this. A considerably large one at that. We shouldn?t be coming back here, there?s too much risk involved. I?m . . . afraid.

    No, I must not fear. Fear is the mindkiller. A Jedi knows no fear there for I should not feel like this. I will permit it to pass over me and through me. I can?t deal with this fear right now, I have a mission to complete. A personal one more so that preforming my duty as a Jedi Padawan. My Master has been taken from me and I should have been there to stop it. Where was I? Some place I should not have been with someone I shouldn?t have been with.

    ?Hey.? I feel soft fingers intertwine with mine. I meet the soft blue eyes of Alyssia, the love of my life. I look at the ugly back alleys that surround us and note that she is the only beauty that I see right now. I squeeze her hand, she should not have come, she should not have come. . . .

    Her free hand is pressed firmly against my mouth. Her red hair flows over her shoulders as she smiles the smile that I fell in love with. ?Fear is the mindkiller,? she gently chides me as she pulls her hand away and kisses me deeply. ?You will permit it to pass over you and through you.? Alyssia pulls me into a warm embrace, rubbing my back, soothing my muscles like she has a magical balm on her fingertips. I want this to last forever, to stay with her, though I fear what price I will pay to keep her.

    No, Kenobi. Fear is the mindkiller and you need your mind to get Qui-Gon back. You owe him that much, you might as well have handed him to the Gurrids yourself.

    The thought of those tall, spider like creatures sends a fresh wave of fear that I try to suppress. They don?t like humans and have forced the small population to live in the cramped slums for decades. That was why we were sent here, to aid the humans in receiving equal rights. One of the leaders is Alyssia Caldan, who would, within a few short days, capture my heart and leave me bewitched by her. I knew the code forbade relationships but I didn?t care. For the first time, I truly didn?t care about rules.

    I draw my hood around my head as she leads me onto the Gurrid sector of the city. The feel of her smooth skin in my hand reminds me of what I went through for the right to this feeling. Qui-Gon suspected out secret meetings, as well as our growing love for one another. He ordered me to end the courtship, giving me lines from the code, as if they could change my feelings. My fear of losing her took over and I screamed things, harsh things that were not meant to be said to the man who had been my father for the past five years.
    I can?t let Qui-Gon die while I have so much to say to him, to apologise for. I can?t lose him, not like this. Regardless of what I said, or what he may think, I love and care for him. I can?t lose him, I won?t lose him, I. . . .

    Alyssia squeezes my hand and brings me out of my fear. I look around, I didn?t even notice that we arrived at the abandoned hotel that her brother had identified. I must not fear, for Qui-Gon?s sake as well as my own. A clear mind is essential for an operation such as this.

    ?We will succeed,? Alyssia smiles that charming smile. How I wish that small act could bring me the calm I so desperately need. Only one can do that. Alyssia?s love can only take me so far. I need another?s to carry me the rest of the way.

    If only I hadn?t risked my Master on a crazy little thing called love. I feel her lips brush my cheek. I cup her face in my hands, staring into those diamond eyes. ?What did I do to deserve you??

    Her eyes dance in the darkness that surrounds us and swirls as the fear inside...

    NO. I must not fear! A Jedi does not know it and I need to keep my head. I am a Jedi, or am I after this whole thing? Don?t even start down that road Kenobi. Let the fear p
  2. Arwen-Jade_Kenobi Jedi Grand Master

    Member Since:
    Feb 9, 2002
    star 5
    No replies?? :(

    Here;s the end anyway

    -------------
    Breathe. Just breathe, Kenobi. You don?t even know where you are do you? Just because this time Qui-Gon is in danger and not you, it?s a whole new situation. Do you think Qui-Gon lets fear come over him like this when he?s looking for you? No, now learn from him and calm down!

    I just can?t lose him, I?ll die without him, I can?t. . . .

    ?Obi.? Her soothing voice enters my awareness. I note that we are still in the hallway alcove, our sights on the two Gurrids who stand guard in front of what had once been a grand ballroom of some kind. Behind those doors is my Master, of that I am sure. I can feel him, I take great joy in the fact that he is unharmed. For now at least.

    ?Obi.? I turn to Alyssia?s worried, yet beautiful face and stroke her cheek with my hand. I hope my mask of calm soothes her more than it does me. I stare at the two guards in an effort to give myself something constructive to do other than let myself give into my fear. I know that I can?t kill either of them, the Human?s case will be forfeit if either of us strikes a Gurrid down. I mouth to Alyssia that she must keep her blaster on stun. She nods as she changes the setting. I remove my saber from it?s place on my belt. One other hangs with it. I make sure the owner gets it back. She and I quietly rise to our feet, my love waits for my signal to shoot. I send a silent prayer to the Force as I nod.

    Alyssia steps out with military precision and stuns the first guard before either of them could blink. The second quickly brought out his own weapon and returned fire. My saber snap-hissed into existence as I send the beams back his way and protect Alyssia. A final clear shot from her gun brings the last guard down. Relief swims through me, one obstacle is gone and I am that much closer to bringing Qui-Gon home. Fear of failure shoots through me, what if I can?t get Qui-Gon out? What if something happens to him, or me, of even Alyssia. I bite my lip and close my eyes and breathe. Fear is the mindkiller, I tell myself again. I must not fear, I will permit it to pass over me and through me. . . .

    ?Obi-Wan? Are you going to help me here? That last one commed for help, we don?t have much time.?

    Alyssia?s words inspire me to move faster and forget me fear entirely. The door?s locked, I dig my saber into the expensive wood and remedy that problem. I hear many footsteps coming our way, it seems that Gurrid called for a small army for assistance. I push Alyssia inside the door and slam it closed, throwing myself against it to keep it that way. ?Find something to brace it with!?

    She quickly complies, finding chairs and a small desk-like thing. We pile tables and anything we can find that will somewhat keep those doors closed. All we need is a few moments. . . .

    //Obi-Wan?//

    The mental contact catches me by surprise as I whirl and see a large, transparent ?room.? I recognize it as a Gurrid Containment Field. I also recognize who is inside it. I leave Alyssia behind me as I rush to him and stop short of the cube itself as I hear Qui-Gon scream a warning over the bond. I skid to a halt as I see Qui-Gon breathe a sigh of relief.

    ?Particle charges,? he informs me. ?This whole cube is surrounded by them.? I reactivate my lightsaber and hit the space between myself and my Master?s prison. Small beams, erupt and block my saber from braking the plexiglass. Fear escalates inside me again, this may be a futile mission after all. But, I can?t leave him here. No way.

    ?Are you okay?? I ask to cover my conflicting emotions.

    He nods, approaching the wall closest to me. ?I?m fine, they haven?t done anything to me yet.? His tone is saturated with assurance, he must know how scared I am. I?m not really concerned with him knowing. All I am concerned about is getting him out of here as soon as possible. I pace the cube, looking for any sort of weakness in the system. Qui-Gon shakes his head, ?There isn?t any way to override it.? My
  3. PatttyB0123 RSA Latin America

    Manager
    Member Since:
    Apr 2, 2003
    star 6
    Why did you kill Obi-Wan? :_|
    [face_devil]


  4. Red_Jedi_Knight Jedi Master

    Member Since:
    May 7, 2002
    star 3
    beautifully written thank you for sharing.... *sniff* sad though...
  5. Arwen-Jade_Kenobi Jedi Grand Master

    Member Since:
    Feb 9, 2002
    star 5
  6. Padawan_Jess_Kenobi Jedi Master

    Member Since:
    Nov 20, 2002
    star 4
    I can?t speak and I know it is soon to be my time as Qui-Gon grants me his forgiveness as I lay, dying, in his arms. Slowly, I understand his fear. He was afraid of losing me to Alyssia, giving his attitude towards our relationship some basis. I reach out weakly ans stroke his cheek, wiping the tears away. //I understand, I forgive you as well.//

    As I feel Qui-Gon?s kiss on my forehead, I close my eyes for what I know is the final time. My last conscious words to him are a warning. One that he must know before the Force takes me away from him.

    //You must not fear. Fear is the mindkiller//


    :_| Obi!!! :_| Wonderfully done, Arwen!! *goes off to cry some more* I can't believe you killed Obi... :(
  7. Arwen-Jade_Kenobi Jedi Grand Master

    Member Since:
    Feb 9, 2002
    star 5
    Jess: Awe *hugs* Thanks for the reply!
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