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Saga "Dreams Fade in Time" Obi-Wan/Anakin/Qui-Gon fic angst. vignette

Discussion in 'Fan Fiction- Before, Saga, and Beyond' started by celine, May 2, 2008.

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  1. celine

    celine Jedi Youngling star 2

    Registered:
    Sep 26, 2007


    "Anakin," Obi-Wan's voice was quiet, patient. "you must retain your focus at all times."

    Anakin frowned in confusion, "But Mister Obi-wan, sir," he began.

    Obi-wan smiled and placed a hand on the boy's shoulder. "I know that it is difficult at first, but nothing that is not difficult is worth learning, Padawan. Welcome the challenge."

    "When do we get to learn the fun stuff?" The nine-year-old asked innocently.

    Obi-wan knelt to his level and held the boy's gaze. "Not until you've mastered the basics, Padawan. The important stuff. And a Jedi does not desire excitement. He desires peace?knowledge."

    Anakin's small features broke into a frown, but he nodded.

    That's enough for today." Obi-wan stood up. "You should head back the temple, I'm certain that Masters Windu and Yoda will have much else to teach you today."

    " Wizard!" Anakin jogged off towards the temple. His enthusiasm amused the Jedi knight, but he cleared his throat.

    "Anakin."

    The boy turned.

    "Be good."

    "Okay Master!"

    *************************************

    Obi-Wan drew in a deep breath and exhaled it slowly he rolled over onto his side and snuggled a little deeper into the comfort of his blankets.

    "Master Obi-Wan sir..." Anakin whispered hesitantly from the doorway.

    The Jedi did not respond, except to turn his head with a little groan.

    " Obi-Wan."

    " What?" Kenobi snapped awake, and sensing no imminent danger, sank back into the bed. He cracked a blue eye open and looked at the small form the doorway. " Anakin, it's late," he mumbled groggily.

    " I know, and I'm sorry to wake you up... But... But..." He paused, and Obi-Wan noticed the boy shiver involuntarily. He hugged himself awkwardly and dropped his gaze. " I'm scared."

    "Of what?" Obi-wan sat up and rubbed his eyes with the heel of his hand.

    " I don't know."

    " Why don't you go back to sleep then, Padawan? Maybe you just had a nightmare."

    Anakin shook his head. " It wasn't a nightmare, it's real. I want my mom."

    Obi-Wan sighed and ran a hand through his shortly cropped sandy hair-- momentarily paused when he did not feel the familiar weight of his braid in his palm. He still had not adjusted to its absence. He was a Jedi knight now. Not an apprentice.

    He sighed and reached a hand out toward the boy. " Padawan," he said softly, unconsciously taking on his former master's soothing, paternal tone.

    Anakin stepped closer and Obi-wan saw the hunted look in the young blue eyes.

    "I understand how you feel."

    " You do? I thought that Jedi were never afraid."

    Obi-wan smiled thoughtfully. " Ideally, that would be so. However, we are all still human or nonhuman as the case may be -but the point is, we feel emotion and the world can be a frightening place sometimes. Especially when we have to go on without someone we love." Obi-wan's voice grew wistful.

    Anakin nodded sagely. " You miss Qui-Gon."

    " Yes. And you miss your mother..." Obi-wan stood up and pulled the boy into an embrace. Anakin returned it warmly.

    " I'm sorry," his voice was small.

    Obi-Wan stepped away and knelt down to the nine year old's height. Blue eyes met blue eyes. "What do you have to be sorry for?"

    "I don't want to be a problem for you."

    Obi-wan knitted his brows together. "What?"

    The boy shrugged. "I know nobody thinks I should be trained. I don't know why."

    Obi-Wan took Anakin by the shoulders. "Anakin you are not a problem, you're my Padawan. The council is simply concerned that you're starting your training so late. But Qui-Gon believed in you... I believe in you."

    " Then why did you fight about me?"

    The Jedi sighed, his gaze turning inward. " I did not want Qui-Gon to defy the council again. I was embarrassed and annoyed that my master insisted on following his own path? But now I understand that he was right. He was right, Anakin."

    " I'm not so sure now, Obi-wan." The little face appeared fragile, vulnerable.

    " Don't doubt, Padawan. Doubt is poison. It p
     
  2. JediKaren

    JediKaren Jedi Youngling star 3

    Registered:
    Apr 26, 2007
    You need to add more detail to the story. It was a bit unclear what was going on, but what I did get was cute.
     
  3. celine

    celine Jedi Youngling star 2

    Registered:
    Sep 26, 2007
    okay, added more to the beginning. I should've put it in earlier.:D
     
  4. JediKaren

    JediKaren Jedi Youngling star 3

    Registered:
    Apr 26, 2007
    That's MUCH better. Good job!
     
  5. arthurweasley

    arthurweasley Jedi Youngling star 1

    Registered:
    Jan 16, 2008
    Love it! =D=
    Poor Anakin senses Palpatine's influence already! And Obi-wan knows it not. Great story!!!
     
  6. celine

    celine Jedi Youngling star 2

    Registered:
    Sep 26, 2007
    Hours later Obi-Wan awoke, and found to his surprise, that his arms were wrapped protectively around a slumbering Anakin. He blearily lifted his head and realized that the boy must've crept into bed with after he's gone to sleep.

    The jedi smiled sadly, remembering times when he'd done similiar things to Qui-Gon. He untangled himself to move away, then stopped, and instead, hugged the boy to his chest, kissing the top of his head tenderly. He might not be able to keep Anakin safe fromthe perils of this world--but from the harrows of his dreams--well, Obi-Wan figured he'd soon be an expert, like his master before him.

    They were only dreams after all...weren't they? Obi-Wan layed his head back down on the pillow and closed his eyes. He stretched out to feel the force around him. Aside from Anakin's incredibly stong presence, he felt another, just barely...but there none the less.

    "Good night, Master," he whispered inaudibly.

    The familiar energy disappated.

    Obi-Wan shivered as a cool breeze blew in through the window. ...And perhaps it was unfortunate as he drifted off to sleep that the Jedi did not notice that the window was not open. That Anakin's dreams were real.
     
  7. celine

    celine Jedi Youngling star 2

    Registered:
    Sep 26, 2007
    comments? anyone? please?
     
  8. arthurweasley

    arthurweasley Jedi Youngling star 1

    Registered:
    Jan 16, 2008
    Eerie ending!!! I felt the chill here, as well. =D=
     
  9. Gkilkenny

    Gkilkenny Jedi Master star 4

    Registered:
    Mar 27, 2004
    "Good night, Master," he whispered inaudibly.

    The familiar energy disappated.

    Obi-Wan shivered as a cool breeze blew in through the window. ...And perhaps it was unfortunate as he drifted off to sleep that the Jedi did not notice that the window was not open. That Anakin's dreams were real.


    A sign of things to come, two younglings trying to
    find their way in a big galaxy:cool:
     
  10. celine

    celine Jedi Youngling star 2

    Registered:
    Sep 26, 2007
    Yes, unfortunately, a sign of things to come...:_|
     
  11. Darth_Leia_6669

    Darth_Leia_6669 Jedi Padawan star 4

    Registered:
    Apr 26, 2003
    Why do I have a feeling that these dreams won't fade? Wonderful opening, and if you have a pm list, could you add me?

    --later--
    6669 [face_devil]
     
  12. C1-J2

    C1-J2 Jedi Youngling star 3

    Registered:
    May 16, 2007
    Creepy ending.

    Looks like these 'dreams' were simply the start of Anakin's fall.

    Great job! =D=
     
  13. celine

    celine Jedi Youngling star 2

    Registered:
    Sep 26, 2007
    Darth Leia:

    Thank you! I'd add you to a PM list if i had one for this...but it's just an eerie little viggie foreshadowing Ani's fall. :)


    C1 J2

    Thanks! Eeerie was what i was going for! :)
     
  14. Valairy Scot

    Valairy Scot Backpacking One Pack a Day Mod of New Films star 6 Staff Member Manager

    Registered:
    Sep 16, 2005
    Responding to the first post:

    Still? Obi-wan fervently hoped that Anakin didn't sense his ambivalence, yet somehow, he suspected that the boy could. That disturbed him. How could he train Anakin to the best of his ability when he, himself, doubted?

    Obi-wan sat back on the bed, he motioned for his Padawan to take a seat next to him.

    He put his arm around the frail shoulders. " Anakin, soon you'll realize that there is nothing to fear. Whatever your past has been, it is over now, and now you are safe. You're among friends. Life is a wonderful thing, embrace it. It's not something to be frightened of. And we,Ani, we privileged few have the Force as our ally. We, of all people, are never alone. We have a sense of being connected to the universe and others will never know."

    The youth nodded slowly, a thoughtful frown crossing his handsome features.

    Obi-wan stood up, and picked Anakin up in his arms. He carried him across the way, and set him in his own bed, tenderly covering him in his gray flannel blankets.

    " I want you to get some sleep, Padawan."

    Anakin nodded, and impulsively, Obi-wan reached out to tousle the fine, soft hair. He turned off the lights and returned to his own room, and fell into bed.

    "Master," he whispered aloud. " is this what you had to go through with me?"

    There was no answer.


    Very nicely done. I like that Obi-Wan recognized his own ambivalence but pushed past it to be a master for Anakin's sake. I love what he said about embracing life and the Force.

    =D=

     
  15. charie

    charie Jedi Youngling star 2

    Registered:
    Oct 6, 2007
    I really enjoyed this. I'm interested to see where this is going. PM please.=D=
     
  16. AngelQueen

    AngelQueen Jedi Master star 4

    Registered:
    Mar 1, 2001
    Aww! *huggles Obi-Wan and Anakin* This is beautiful, celine! Your Obi-Ani bonding is wonderful! :) Love it!
     
  17. Helen_Taft

    Helen_Taft Jedi Knight star 2

    Registered:
    Mar 18, 2008
    This is excellent! You have a very visual writing style that hooks you in so that you can see what is happening as well as hear it through the dialogue and introspection. I have to agree with someone above on liking how you're portraying Obi-Wan's ambivalence and need to get past it for Anakin's sake. You really have the characterisation of Obi-Wan nailed down in my opinion. I'm looking forward to seeing where you go with this. A wonderful, creepy and yet heartwarming start. =D= =D= =D=
     
  18. celine

    celine Jedi Youngling star 2

    Registered:
    Sep 26, 2007
    Valairy: Thank you! I wanted to write something exploring that ambivilence.

    Charie: Thanks! I'd add you to a PM, but I think I'm leaving this as an ominous foreshadowing viggie.

    AngelQueen: I'm glad you liked it!

    Helen: Thank you for the lovely, well thought out feedback!
     
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