Before Dreamweaver--Obi-Wan/Qui-Gon vignette--Vignette 45

Discussion in 'Fan Fiction- Before, Saga, and Beyond' started by DarthIshtar, May 27, 2006.

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  1. DarthIshtar Chosen One

    Member Since:
    Mar 26, 2001
    star 9
    Note: Thanks to kateydidnt who challenged me to write this while we were having a very odd conversation about dreams.
    *****
    "I had the strangest dream last night."

    Qui-Gon would have smiled and chided Obi-Wan for his use of such an imprecise term, but Obi-Wan usually wasn't this talkative in the mornings and this was something to be heeded.

    "A dream or a Force vision?" Qui-Gon asked.

    Obi-Wan, looking altogether too pensive for the average seventeen-year-old as always, waved his spoon vaguely. "It wasn't entirely clear."

    "Have you meditated on it this morning?" he suggested mildly.

    Meditation was generally like the generic painkiller corephem--it was something that a Master could prescribe with the words 'take four hours of this and call me in the morning.'

    "Do you meditate on Yoda's shaving cream?"

    He could do little more than blink and ponder rather frantically the question of whether or not Obi-Wan was serious.

    "Not as a general practice, no," Qui-Gon confessed rather cautiously. "Do you think it would help?"

    "No," Obi-Wan reasoned, "which is why I haven't meditated on it!"

    Apparently, this was supposed to make some kind of sense to him, but he could not honestly understand how or why.

    "Tell me more about this dream," he prompted, sitting at the kitchen table with the air of someone about to undergo a very painful experience.

    "It was about Master Yoda needing to lend his shaving cream to Master Windu so Master Windu could shave his nose hairs."

    Qui-Gon wasn't even sure Master Windu had nose hairs, much less that they needed to be shaved. He honestly hadn't bothered to look that close in years.

    "Go on," he said, honestly wishing that he could avoid that suggestion.

    "Well, it was all fine and good until we found out that Siri had put julaberry sauce in Master Yoda's shaving cream because it would dye his hair fuschia and Yoda started whacking Jocasta Nu with his walking stick because she had put the julaberries in the same box as the datacards for The Ugly Mynockling..."

    "I see," Qui-Gon lied, hoping to cut this off before he went into a glaze-eyed stupor.

    "And Bant, Siri, Bruck and Depa Billaba were all doing a kickline and singing that one song about Jedi Attachments from Jedi: The Musical. You know, the one about..."

    "I get the idea," Qui-Gon interrupted frantically.

    That song was hardly appropriate for Masters and definitely not suitable for a teenager with an overload of hormones. Perhaps it would be appropriate to meditate that out of the boy's system.

    "Well, then they wanted me to do a dance solo because the turbolift wouldn't work..."

    Too late. Eye-glaze had taken full effect and it would take a supreme effort with the help of the Force to escape it.

    "And then you were there, wearing a Twi'lek dancing costume. I must say you have QUITE shapely legs..."

    "OBI-WAN!"

    The roar of near-panic seemed to snap them both out of their state. Obi-Wan blinked, obviously wondering when and how he had lost his train of thought. Qui-Gon blinked, trying to recover some kind of control over the situation.

    "So, what do you think, Master?" Obi-Wan asked at last in deferential curiosity.

    Qui-Gon sighed sympathetically, then patted his Padawan's shoulder. "Dreams pass in time," he assured the young man.

    Let's hope this one passes instantaneously.
  2. Healer_Leona Manager Emeritus

    Member Since:
    Jul 7, 2000
    star 9
    "Do you meditate on Yoda's shaving cream?"

    This and the fact Qui-Gon seemed to actually think about it left me laughing. HA!!! Great dream. If I were Obi-Wan, I'd be hoping it would continue the folloiwng night. [face_laugh] [face_laugh]
  3. Araxie Force Ghost

    Member Since:
    Mar 6, 2006
    star 3
    Let's hope this one passes instantaneously.

    This really made me laugh. Don't I wis some dreams would do that![face_laugh]
  4. dm1 Force Ghost

    Member Since:
    Jun 9, 2004
    star 4
    [face_laugh] This was funny, Qui Gon actually thinking before answering about the shaving cream. I can see why he'd go into a stupor, it all seemed kind of random. Oh, but when Obi Wan commented on his legs, well, that broke him out of it all right!

    Sage wisdom, dreams pass with time...
  5. JediMaster_Jen Force Ghost

    Member Since:
    Jun 3, 2002
    star 4
    This was hilarious. [face_laugh]


    Let's hope this one passes instantaneously.

    Loved that line. :)

  6. DarthIshtar Chosen One

    Member Since:
    Mar 26, 2001
    star 9
    Healer_Leona--LOL, glad you enjoyed that moment. That would be a very fascinating thing to continue.

    Araxie--I have the same feeling. :) Thanks!

    dm1--LOL, yes, thanks. It would be a stupor-inducing description and it was entirely random. The legs thing would be downright frightening.

    JediMaster_Jen--Thanks! :) Glad you liked that line. This was hilarious.


    Let's hope this one passes instantaneously.

    Loved that line.

  7. Gkilkenny Force Ghost

    Member Since:
    Mar 27, 2004
    star 4


    That was sooo funny[face_laugh]
    I giggled as I read it I am glad no one was in the room or they may have thought I had gone silly.8-}
    Very nice piece[face_dancing]
  8. kenobiwanobi Jedi Knight

    Member Since:
    Jun 26, 2005
    star 3
    very nice and funny little post!!!!!!!!!!
  9. -Darksaber- Jedi Knight

    Member Since:
    Mar 22, 2005
    star 3
    Lovely little vig, DarthIshtar! Well done, and I thank you muchly for making my laugh so hard!:)

  10. DarthIshtar Chosen One

    Member Since:
    Mar 26, 2001
    star 9
    Gkilkenny--LOL, thanks! Giggling is a good thing to do.

    kenobiwanobi--Thanks, kenobiwanobi!

    -Darksaber---Thanks, Darksaber. My pleasure for making you laugh.
  11. Meredith_Kenobi Jedi Master

    Member Since:
    Jul 20, 2005
    star 4
    "Have you meditated on it this morning?" he suggested mildly.

    [face_laugh] Ha! He says it so casually! Kinda' like, 'Did you remember to brush your teeth, this morning?'

    Meditation was generally like the generic painkiller corephem--it was something that a Master could prescribe with the words 'take four hours of this and call me in the morning.'

    *snork!*

    He could do little more than blink and ponder rather frantically the question of whether or not Obi-Wan was serious.

    [face_laugh]

    Apparently, this was supposed to make some kind of sense to him, but he could not honestly understand how or why.

    "Tell me more about this dream," he prompted, sitting at the kitchen table with the air of someone about to undergo a very painful experience.

    [face_laugh] Okay, and that's kinda' like, 'All right, I didn't get that. Maybe if I move past it fast enough, he won't notice'

    He honestly hadn't bothered to look that close in years.

    [face_worried] So...at one point he DID look that close?

    "So, what do you think, Master?" Obi-Wan asked at last in deferential curiosity.

    Qui-Gon sighed sympathetically, then patted his Padawan's shoulder. "Dreams pass in time," he assured the young man.

    Let's hope this one passes instantaneously.


    [face_laugh] [face_laugh] [face_laugh] [face_laugh] [face_laugh] [face_laugh] [face_laugh] [face_laugh]
    I LOVED this! It was Hilarious, with a capital 'H'!!!!!!!!!
  12. Frostfyre Jedi Knight

    Member Since:
    Oct 25, 1999
    star 3
    LOL!!

    Ah, the joys of parenthood. Rule number 684: Don't ask teenagers about their dreams.

    Though I rather wonder if, once we got to the Twi'lek dancing costume bit, if Obi-Wan wasn't gently winding his master up...
  13. TheLurker Jedi Knight

    Member Since:
    Aug 4, 2005
    star 1
    "Do you meditate on Yoda's shaving cream?"

    [face_laugh] [face_laugh] [face_laugh] [face_laugh] [face_laugh] [face_laugh]

    "And then you were there, wearing a Twi'lek dancing costume. I must say you have QUITE shapely legs..."

    [face_laugh] [face_laugh] [face_laugh] [face_laugh] [face_laugh] [face_laugh]

    This one actually had me laughing out loud, which is quite unusual for me to do. Luckily I'm the only one home...

    ~Rhi
  14. Renton Kenobi Force Ghost

    Member Since:
    May 24, 2000
    star 4
    Heehee, Yoda Shaving Cream! That's awesome :)
  15. DarthIshtar Chosen One

    Member Since:
    Mar 26, 2001
    star 9
    Meredith_Kenobi--Yeah, it was pretty casual, which was one of the more fun things to write. Obi-Wan thinks there's nothing to find strange about this whole thing. LOL, I'm very proud of the "take four hours of this and call me in the morning," but can't take credit for it. It's a 'tribute' to Linda Bennett, who was our medical contact as missionaries. It didn't matter if you were going into shock or had food poisoning. She always told you to "take four ibuprofen every six hours and call me in a week." The matter of did he look that close is definitely a don't ask, don't tell. :) Thanks with a capital 'T'!

    Renton Kenobi--Glad you enjoyed. Thanks!

    TheLurker--LOL, thanks. Glad it evoked such a strong response.

    Frostfyre--I hope, when I have kids, that they won't be quite like this, but yeah, I'll remember rule 684. I don't think Obi-Wan was intentionally winding his Master up.
  16. Veloz Force Ghost

    Member Since:
    Aug 30, 2004
    star 6
    [face_laugh] this was funny

    Good to see that even jedi have weird dreams, cause i sure as hell have had my share of those :oops: [face_laugh]
  17. Kestrel_Kenobi Force Ghost

    Member Since:
    Sep 26, 2005
    star 4
    [face_laugh]

    Oh dear - that was so funny...

    Qui-Gon sighed sympathetically, then patted his Padawan's shoulder. "Dreams pass in time," he assured the young man.

    Let's hope this one passes instantaneously.


    [face_laugh]

    =D=
  18. ardavenport Force Ghost

    Member Since:
    Dec 16, 2004
    star 4
    [face_laugh] I second that on the last line! Dreams can be so confusing and sometimes disturbing for a Jedi. I wonder how Obi-Wan came up with all that stuff? :D
  19. Lilith Demodae Force Ghost

    Member Since:
    Oct 1, 1999
    star 4
    Qui needs to learn when not to ask any more questions...
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