Early drafts of Episode I

Hi all!

This is my first post here adn I hope there's been no such thing mentioned before on this forum. I'm very interested in developement of the story mentioned in TPM. After reading probably all the possible versions of early scripts for ANH I got very interested in te way all the other SW films were 'growing up' to eventually become of what we know of them. as far as TPM is concerned I couldn't get to any other script than the official one (with some scenes not included in the final cut) but what interests me most are the previous versions of the scrit. For instance I know that first Obi-Wan went negotiating alone. He only met Qui-Gon when they finally reached Couscant. Or that Padme and Amidala were first two separate persons. Padme was Anakins co-pilot during the Naboo battle. Naboo was previously called Utapu... and so on. Do you by any means know of any source were I could get such early scrits? And what do you think about the early concepts? Do you think the movie went eventually in a good direction?

 

There's an "insiders guide" CDROM which has an early draft of the TPM script. And the shooting script is available in bookshops, which is slightly different to what appears in the film- only in that there's a couple of lines that were cut out- that kind of thing.

If you can find anything online, then I'd be interested to hear about it!

 

I've got the shooting script and htere are a few differences but obviously I'd like to dig deeper

 

The only one I know of is the Episode One: Insider's Guide CD-Rom which contains descriptions of scenes from earlier drafts.

Some of the ideas and concepts from those drafts, especially the revised rough draft, are very good.

Jar Jar is smarter, Maul has more lines, etc. but some stuff is too much like Amidala with Anakin fighting in space, the deflector shield, Naboo decoy ships, etc.

 

There were a lot of ideas and scenes mentioned in the Insider's Guide that should have stayed in the film and would have made it better overall.

Originally there was more hostility between the Gungans and the Naboo. Jar Jar was forced to stay outside the palace while Obi-Wan met with the Queen, who later wouldn't allow Jar Jar to board her ship until Obi-Wan convinces her otherwise.

There was more foreshadowing to larger hands at work. In one scene on Tatooine, Amidala notices Obi-Wan in deep thought and says, "You look like you're trying to solve all the problems in the universe." Obi-Wan replies, "No, only our own, but who knows, maybe they'll become the universes' problems."

Another cool scene that was dropped was when returning to Naboo, originally there were many more Federation ships, so to avoid detection, Obi-Wan suggests the ship jumps out of hyperspace between the TF ships and the surface of the planet. Of course many of the crew object, but Obi-Wan believes Anakin can do it and sitting beside him, walked him through it, and has Anakin deactivate the hyperdrive right before the reach the planet. Anakin succeeds.

Also, like you said, the main difference in earlier drafts was Obi-Wan discovered Anakin and had all of Qui-Gon's dialogue. If it was that way in the final film, TPM would have successfully established our 3 main characters. As it is now, Obi-Wan gets shortchanged (in my opinion, the films biggest flaw). Amidala, however, gets the necessary development. You can see the beginnings of her relationship with Anakin in the film.

 

Wasn't the lighsaber duel in the early drafts of The Phantom Menace drasticly different. I remember hearing something about there being dialouge between Darth Maul and Obi Wan.

And wasn't Anakin alot more mature in the older drafts?

 

Yeah, I've heard that after QGJ gets impaled, before the shield raises, OB1 says something about recognizing Maul's style. How it was old, that's why he didn't recognize it at first. Then, after killing Maul, Obi says his master told him something like if you can't adapt, you'll die.

I think TFN had it here under Darth Maul and Obi Wan chat

But that whole section of rumors is fascinating!

 

This is all cool stuff guys!

Does noone have a link to an entire early draft though? I was very interested to read it, if it is available.

Also does anyone know of an equivelant for AOTC?

 

he says Lern not live not

 

One of the best lines for Maul comes right before the duel when Obi-Wan and Qui-Gon are heading for the shield generator.

Obi-Wan: I hope we're in time.

Maul then steps out of the shadows

Maul: In time for your own destruction.

 

So noone has a link to a script of the early drafts of TPM?


Disappointing.

 

One of the best lines for Maul comes right before the duel when Obi-Wan and Qui-Gon are heading for the shield generator.

Obi-Wan: I hope we're in time.

Maul then steps out of the shadows

Maul: In time for your own destruction.

Oh dear lord, no. Having Maul just show up and start kicking ass was so much better than the archetypical action pre- and post-kill quip routine. I hate HATE those action scene witticisms.

 

I remember I found a page that had all of the drafts for every SW movie (it also included the original idea that was something like a page),and I put it in my favorites.

But then I organized my favorites folder and lost it.

Sad, isn't it?

~R55~

 

Here's a terrific page to check out, that'll probably answer most or all of your questions:

The Phantom Menace Drafts

 

Good discussion. Thanks everyone.

 

Here are my comments on the early draft based on the info provided in the link by Leto II.

I actually like the "Obi Wan without Qui Gon at the beginning" alot- seeing as it would develop his character much more.

I think the Gungans should still turn down warning the Naboo as in the film...

Establish the Naboo-Gungan tension by all means....the part where Amidala orders Jar Jar off the ship would be great

Show the Trade Federation wipe out the Naboo police force....

On Tantooine ALOT of that stuff should have been kept in ....(assuming Obi Wan is going and not Qui GOn)

Obi Wan -Padme conversations

Anakin being more mature....for example:
Padme: Is slavery natural?
Anakin:No but the stupidity of some people is.

Shmi's lines are nice in the rough draft... "Son, it is time for you to let go...to give me up. I cannot travel this path with you. I've told you, life is a continual transition. You cannot hold time still, stop the sunrise, sunset, or the flow of the Force. Every moment you must let go something..." Nice line

Watto's final conversation with Anakin is pretty neat

Keep the saber fight as it was in the film....that vibrating stuff is neat but it kinda makes u wonder why no one else does it...

Introducing Qui Gon at Coruscant would work ...as long as they take time to develop him but I am not sure of how well he is developed in the early drafts

The Senate scenes should be left as they are even though I like how complex everything is in the early drafts...unfortunately no one would understand it or even bother trying...overall must of the scenes on Coruscant are better in the film than in these older drafts....

Amidala and Jar Jar's discussion would be a nice scene...we kinda get that in the film version...

The whole Anakin making the jump out of hyperspace is a sweeet idea -should have been in there...

Jar Jar's speech to Boss Nass would have been great...he should have made it after an abreviated version of Padme's...it would have made his promotion to Senator more believable

The whole end battle is kinda confusing in these early drafts....keep it the way it is in the film...I like some of Maul's dialouge but it may have felt outta place
"You're finished, Jedi, and this is the beginning of the end for all Jedi." But thats a great one...

....I like how Anakin was allowed to fight in the battle and how the space battle was more detailed....but overall the film version was more clear

Jar Jar should have definitely been portrayed in this battle as he was in these early drafts...

Well thats all I have time for...at least for now

 

Thanks! Great link.

It's a pity some ideas didn't make it to the final version. For instace I would be happy to see more of Trade Federation troops taking over the Naboo. The police scene would be just great. I mean in the film you couldn't really feel that the people of Naboo are starving, dying or whatever. And some rebels in the city (as it is towards the end of the early story) would also show more that the Naboo isn't only the Queen and Sio Bible and a bunch of pilots.
The ida of Obi Wan alone at the first part of the movie, although I heard that Qui Gon was introduced to be able to show some dialog and therfore make an insight into Jedi's minds - show what they'r thinking.
I also found this link here: http://www.supershadow.com/starwars/episode1/draft1.html . It looks like it's not fake and watch out because if you're avoiding EIII spoiles because the end of the story shown there might give you a hint on what could be happening at the beinning of EIII.

 

Do not trust the reliability of Supershadow.

 

yes supershadow is a lier

 

well, I'm quite sceptic guy, but thi one is either done by somebody knowing what it's all about wery well or it really is taken from GL's very early notes on Ep 1 and the whle prequel trilogy.
Actually it depends on when it was put on this site. If it was after EII was released then I might agree that it's fake
anyway still a good raed an gives yet anothr sight on how the story might ave been looking

 

@elfnmatrix

What about vibrating? (I'm being serious)

 

"What about vibrating? (I'm being serious)"

In the early drafts of TPM there was a fight between Maul and Obi Wan where they would vibrate so fast they would become invisible. It would bring up some real plot holes like "why doesn't anyone else use it?"

Nevertheless that would totally kick arse visually if done right.

 

That's probably an explanation for how they planned to elaborate on the jedi mind trick... lame.