Saga Endings...A Purge Challenge...Short Vig Complete...

Discussion in 'Fan Fiction- Before, Saga, and Beyond' started by Zane-Marit, Aug 3, 2004.

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  1. Zane-Marit Jedi Knight

    Member Since:
    Jul 11, 2003
    star 3
    This is for the challenge from the resource board...I did it quickly so please be nice :)


    Endings


    He was trapped?and he knew it. He closed down his lightsaber and knelt down into a meditative trance. He focused on his breathing techniques, calming himself. He replayed recent events in his mind. How the ship had come under attack by a Republic frigate. How the troopers had boarded his vessel and begun to slaughter all aboard.

    The sound of the docking collar attaching itself to the port side of the Galliant echoed in his memory. He could smell the metallic tinted smoke of the plasma torches as they cut neat quick circles into the ships main walkway. The firefight that ensued was brief as the waves of troopers overwhelmed the few Jedi that took it upon themselves to mount a defense.

    That was when pandemonium set in among the crew. Everyone aboard was an easy target for the Republics finest. He remembered how he set foot cautiously from his stateroom, green blade glowing from its hilt. Sensing the troopers as they spread throughout the ship like fingers splayed from a hand. Divide and conquer 101. He made his way towards the rear. Exactly where the troopers wanted him and he knew that. Still he went.

    Random blaster bolts could be heard, hitting their marks or tracking their quarry. This was a tulpa shoot. No challenge to these troopers at all.

    That?s when he came across four of them. By will of the Force he had caught them by surprise, their backs to him. He had killed two before the others had known what happened. Both managed to fire a single shot, which were easily deflected back towards his assailants before he cleanly severed limbs. One still clutched its blaster. The nerve endings spasmed, causing the blaster to fire off random shots harmlessly against the bulkhead.

    That was what caused it, he reflected. Those shots echoed down the walkway alerting another group of troopers. Before he knew a hail of blaster fire tracked towards him as he ran back towards the way he came from. He knew no matter how fast his force enhanced run would carry him, he could never out run the troopers radios. More shots came at him from new directions as the troopers pinpointed his location.

    His blade unconsciously blocked the deadly blasts aimed at him with a speed rivaled only by the number of shots chasing him. He managed to seal himself in the engine room as red bolts splattered around him. His saber disabled the doors lock, but it would only be temporary?

    Slowly his eyes opened and he saw the familiar sparks of the plasma torches coming through the door. He rose and activated the emerald green blade. With a few short strokes the hyperdrive casing had been cut free. He held the blade just above the drives core as he kept his eyes on the door.

    A puff of white smoke was the precursor of small debris flying from the center of the door. The chunks of the door were followed by scarlet bolts lancing out from the troopers blasters. He waited until the first tentative leg of white armor stepped through, then plunged the blade of his saber into the hyperdrive core. He imagined a look of shock behind that troopers helmet as the blade pierced the core.

    A bright white light swallowed him whole, and he smiled. He was not sad or angry that his physical existence had come to an end. He knew a better life waited, an opportunity to be part of a new circle, to continue in another plane. The thought of possibly saving the lives of other fellow Jedi widened his smile even more?
  2. tangled_sphere Jedi Master

    Member Since:
    Dec 28, 2003
    star 4
    That was so vivid Zane. I could just feel the ship docking and the impending doom as the troopers entered. And then he destroys the reactor core...

    A bright white light swallowed him whole, and he smiled. He was not sad or angry that his physical existence had come to an end. He knew a better life waited, an opportunity to be part of a new circle, to continue in another plane. The thought of possibly saving the lives of other fellow Jedi widened his smile even more? Great ending, Zane!
  3. Lilith Demodae Force Ghost

    Member Since:
    Oct 1, 1999
    star 4
    Excellent! I like the way he made a noble sacrifice, rather than fighting to the end.
  4. VaderLVR64 Manager Emeritus

    Member Since:
    Feb 5, 2004
    star 8
    Very nicely done. And the sacrifice was very much in character for a Jedi. Great work.
  5. Zane-Marit Jedi Knight

    Member Since:
    Jul 11, 2003
    star 3
    Thanks for the comments guys...as always, they are greatly appreciated.

    I kind of threw this one out in a hurry and just kind of glanced it over before posting it. I just wanted to try something from a different perspective and I think this one worked.

    I'll admit though that it could have been better...
  6. Healer_Leona Manager Emeritus

    Member Since:
    Jul 7, 2000
    star 9
    Very nice!! A very noble end and even in the tragedy The thought of possibly saving the lives of other fellow Jedi widened his smile even more?[/i[] I found this full of hope.
  7. JediNemesis Jedi Master

    Member Since:
    Mar 27, 2003
    star 4
    Very nice shortie, very vivid. :) I, also, liked the idea of him sacrificing himself to save other Jedi. Good work!
  8. Mjsullivan Jedi Knight

    Member Since:
    Dec 8, 2003
    star 3
    I think that this is the most refreshingly positive post about the Jedi Purge I've ever read, Zane-Marit :D There arent too many purge fics that will end on a high(ish) note like that one, and your story is all the more original for it.

    Well done :)
  9. Zane-Marit Jedi Knight

    Member Since:
    Jul 11, 2003
    star 3
    Thanks guys...I always pictured Jedi being at peace in the end, as if they knew something better was ahead, that their deaths weren't in vain. So, a noble sacrifice seemed like an obvious choice.

    Although, I did teeter on having them give into hate. But that may be for another vig... (Evil laugh)
  10. Indra Force Ghost

    Member Since:
    Dec 31, 2003
    star 3
    That was tense. I never knew whether he would actually make it out alive or not. Brilliant solution.
  11. Kynstar Jedi Grand Master

    Member Since:
    Mar 2, 2004
    star 5
    Oh loved how he sacrificed himself! That was great! And he is right... perhaps a few more will be spared for the time being, even though we all know what will be the ultimate deimise of all Jedi.

    Great work :D
  12. Zane-Marit Jedi Knight

    Member Since:
    Jul 11, 2003
    star 3
    A noble sacrifice seemed so obvious to me, so I ran with that. Other have come up with some interesting ideas of their own.

    Thanks to everyone that read this...I didn't expect this kind of response.
  13. Fate Force Ghost

    Member Since:
    Apr 22, 2003
    star 3
    This was very good, Zane-Marit. [face_love] I love how people keep managing to find relatively happy endings in such a horrible time-frame - it's helping to keep me sane as I read Purge entry after Purge entry...

    I enjoyed your use of imagery - my favorite was when you described the wave of stormtroopers as "splayed fingers from a hand" - I actually made the gesture, and it was an apt comparison. ;)

    The only bright spots in this horrible point in time were the heroes, and your character was definitely one of that number - he knew that he would die, and chose to meet his end with honor.

    Wonderful job. [face_love]



    For freedom. For justice. Viva la Rebellion.

  14. AnakinsHeir Jedi Knight

    Member Since:
    May 2, 2004
    star 3
    Very nicely done! Great work.
  15. Gina Force Ghost

    Member Since:
    Jun 3, 2003
    star 4
    Very nicely done! I could really feel the sense of urgency and chaos. Loved the ending. His sacrifice epitomizes the ideals of a Jedi.
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