"Ewan McGregor Meet Obi-Wan Kenobi"

Here's a long post



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Piloting the tiny craft proved far more difficult than Obi-Wan had expected. Escape pods were always a joy to mess with, and being out-of-date (practically vestige), it proved to be even more enjoyable. The planet?s gravitational pull brought the pod?s descent down at an alarming rate. It didn?t help that it?s repulsorlifts were in poor shape. Escape pods could be controlled to some extent, but even then it was a practical free-fall.

Beautiful green landscape rushed to greet him, and the Jedi drew upon the Force, slowing the rapid descent marginally. Alas! A pond! Grunting from the effort, Obi-Wan managed to alter the pod?s course, and then released his strangling hold, bracing himself for the sudden impact. Despite the restraining belt and his being prepared, Obi-Wan fell against the wall with a heavy thud.

It occurred to him then that perhaps he was no immune to concussions. The pain in the back of his head was dull, and the administration of the Force easily kept it at bay.

Water ran down the small portal as the pod bobbed over the pond?s surface. Obi-Wan could see a large, green pasture and trees. A clear blue sky met the crest of a large hill, which was dotted with four-legged animals. Unbuckling from the restraint, he quickly checked the pods sensors. Dead as the Sith, he thought. Without further delay, he opened the hatch and crawled out into the warm day.

Five four-legged creatures stared at him, looking now more peeved than frightened. They stood stock-still at the waters edge, delicate muzzles flared, tiny, pointed ears pricked forward. Bobbing just above the muddy water, Obi-Wan scrutinized them. There were no obvious claws, and they didn?t appear dangerous, rather annoyed that this odd creature would land in their drinking water and disturb their peace. While their thin coats varied in hues of brown, their conformation was identical. A powerhouse of a body standing on four delicate hooved legs; long, graceful necks that were accentuated by flowing manes; intelligent dark eyes that glittered at him.

Obi-Wan classified them as grazing animals, perhaps work beasts. Carefully, he balanced on the bobbing pod, checking his lightsaber, finding the power off, and then submerged into the water. The animals snorted and stepped back two strides, tossing their heads as he began to swim to the muddy shore. The pond wasn?t deep, and he touched the sloppy ground in seconds. It was cold, the shore slippery.

By now the beasts had retreated, never showing him their backs, wary but curious. Perhaps humans inhabited this planet, and their not surprised by another. Out of the water, he turned and watched the pod sink, the open hatch filling with the muddy water. Not a loss. Then Obi-Wan scanned his surroundings. The pasture was huge, more creatures dotting the rolling hills. A white fence stretched in each direction, allowing the animals to range freely. In the near distance, several rectangular buildings were clustered together, perhaps the living quarters of a more intelligent species.

It was a lovely scene, but Obi-Wan had not come to sight-see. He squinted up at the clear sky, searching for a sign of Qui-Gon?s pod. Surely his Master had escaped. He would have felt it otherwise . . . **Of course he did, Kenobi. Stop worrying and start doing something about it!**

A soft pressure and nibbling brought Obi-Wan out of his thoughts. He spun around, spooking the five beasts. They pivoted on their graceful legs, kicking up their heels and squealing. Just as soon as they?d spooked, they stopped, turned and observed him, eyes bright with curiosity born in them. He smiled with faint amusement as one stretched out a pink muzzle, grumbling deep in it?s throat. It took a step towards him, then another, joined by the others.

Wet noses went for his hands, nudging them, looking for treats. Obi-Wan shoved his hands into the sleeves of his robe, avoiding possible amputation. They didn?t leave, searching the rest of him impatiently.

 

Ker-plunk!

BOING!

 

COOL!

This is great! ::giggle:: Can't wait to read more!

 

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Two of the men hurried after him, and Obi-Wan was now alone with the others. They glared at him, bodily reaching for his arms. ?You have some explaining to do,? one snarled.

?I?m not here to resist or harm,? Obi-Wan said calmly.

They regarded him coolly, grabbed his arms anyway, and hauled him around the building. Obi-Wan walked quickly enough with the taller men, refusing to be dragged. He wasn?t worried about them, his case would be open and shut once he explained the emergency landing. What worried him was what happened to Qui-Gon. Hopefully, he?d landed in a bit more hospitable place than this.

Curious eyes followed the trio into one of the barns. A short woman and a taller man hurried up, faces alert and stern. ?What?s this, Ned?? the red-haired woman demanded, green eyes observing Obi-Wan, a corner of her tight mouth twitching upward. ?A creative thief??

?Found him slinking around the barns,? Ned answered. ?Funny get-up, ain?t it??

?What?s happening with Doxin and Black Jack?? she asked, accusing eyes glaring at Obi-Wan.

?Fight. Booster?s up there with Bill and Sid.? Ned?s grip tightened on Obi-Wan?s arm, and the Padawan suppressed an irritated sigh.

The taller man frowned at him. ?What are you doing at Acres Ranch, son??

?My escape pod landed in your back pasture,? Obi-Wan answered. ?I was merely finding help.?

They all exchanged confused looks. ?You what??

?Our ship was damaged in the asteroid field, and we made an emergency landing. I was merely searching for help.? Obi-Wan realized that they all looked rather amused by this.

?What a Trekkie!? Ned chuckled. ?What a story! All right, where do you want him until the police show up??

?Kid?s watching too much Star Trek,? the taller man agreed. ?Don?t want him by the horses. Bring him to my office.?

 

I've been hopeing for one of the hired hands to recognize Obi's lightsaber and turn out to be a Star Wars fanatic! Or at least notice he looks like Ewan.

I loved the horses!

 

"what a trekkie" *laugh* I love this story!!

 

Obi-Wan was surprised just how primitive this planet was to the majority of the galaxy. It seemed everything was wood, and the doors were opened mechanically, the entire set-up shouting lack of galactic technology. He sat impatiently in the hard chair in Mr. Bowdeen, the farm manager?s, office. A blue-uniformed police officer was interrogating him, a pad of flimsy out as he sat on the desk.

The moment the man had entered, pot-belly and all, Obi-Wan had known things would not go well. The busy eyebrows on the fat forehead had raised, and he?d shaken his head, muttering something about ?Star Wars brats?.

?So, tell me, son. What?s your name??

?Obi-Wan Kenobi.?

The policeman bursting into laughter, Mr. Bowdeen chuckling as well. The red-haired woman, Trainer as they called her, merely rolled her eyes. ?That?s about as ridiculous as his excuse. At least he didn?t say Luke Skywalker! Did you see that toy on his belt? The lightsaber? My nephew has one just like it.?

Obi-Wan?s brow furrowed in confusion. A lightsaber being a toy? What was so ridiculous about his name? Sure, a few creatures had smirked at the rhyming tones, but it wasn?t like it was his fault!

The policeman?s chuckles died and he cleared his throat. ?Stop playing around, son. What is your real name? And it better not be Mace Windu or Anakin.?

Mace Windu??? How could they possibly know of the Jedi Master? ?That is my name, sir. Obi-Wan Kenobi.?

The cop didn?t laugh this time, only swore and stood up, glowering over Obi-Wan. ?I?m not here to play games. You?ve violated the law by trespassing and now lying to an officer of the law. I?m going to have to arrest you and bring you to the department.?

?I have lied,? Obi-Wan protested as the officer pulled out manacles. ?I have an ID disc.?

?Disc? Shoot, you?re really into this, aren?t you?? The officer almost laughed again. ?Some sort of freak cult, boy? Make you dress-up as Jedi and play lightsabers??

The joke was beyond Obi-Wan. He couldn?t see anything funny about it. He wanted to resist the arrest, but a Jedi was not to break any laws of a given planet. Resisting arrest would only cause problems and uproar. The cuffs were cold, and he decided best not to argue as the officer examined the small disc.

?What the hell is this??

?My ID. Do you not have the proper scanner??

The cop glared at him and tossed the piece back. ?Refusing to show ID. You?re just raking them up, aren?t ya? All right, out with you now.?

The large man pushed Obi-Wan out of the farmhouse door and out to the strange vehicle awaiting them. It vaguely resembled a landspeeder, but it stood on four wheels of rubber. Again, primitive. Obi-Wan was shoved into the back of the vehicle, a netting separating him from the driver?s seat. As the vehicle rolled down the drive-way, sirens blared.

Sighing in frustration, Obi-Wan sat back in the seat. Where in all of the galaxy was he? And what had happened to Qui-Gon?

 

*snicker* I can't get enough of this one, Amidolee. *cackles madly*

 

Uppers!

 

Some freak cult! That would be us, huh? heehee!!

So, in the Earth timeline, TPM came out lastyear? Just like, well, us? I'm 'fused!

aa

 

It's May 2000 on Earth, but 1 year before TPM in the rest of the galaxy.

 

AH, so if Obi and Qui find a copy of TPM, things could get interesting!

aa

 

Ohhh, this is great! Poor Obi, he doesn't know what he's in for, could have a hundred girls falling at his feet... rather a nasty surprise for him. =D

Wonderful story, I'll come join you soon's I get a moment to write... can't WAIT!

 

wow! this is really good! post more! I can't wait...

--Mr. P

 

I'm sort of waiting for JMMJ before I move onto the next part. Patience!

 

we're not *exactly* a freak cult...
more!!!!!!!!!!
well, maybe...

 

Laughed 'til I felt ill (the chocolate/peanut butter mousse cake for dessert didn't help either!)

PLEEEEEEAAAAAAAASE, Amidolee, give us all cameos!

(And post more soon. You DON'T want to make us mad. The Star Wars quiz I took said I was most like Senator Palpatine!)

--Renata

 

Okay, JMMJ's post will be showing up later, but there were just some things we had to clarify to know we were on the right track and all

Here's a post to make up for the delay!


Chapter Three

Similar thoughts for his Padawan ran through Qui-Gon?s mind as he inspected the damage created by his own ungraceful landing. The pod was ruined, but most were after one use. He?d managed to land in a large field, rows of towering plants surrounding him. Well, there were still a few standing. The impact had left a wide radius of burning plants in it?s wake. It wasn?t enough to cause a blaze, just enough to kill a small margin of the crop.

The last time Qui-Gon had seen Obi-Wan had been when the pod had disappeared beneath the cloud surface. His own pod had jettisoned short afterwards. He estimated they were several, if not a thousand, miles apart. It was not a comforting fact, and he prayed the young man had landed safely. Perhaps Obi-Wan?s misgivings for the mission hadn?t far off the mark.

Giving a small sigh, Qui-Gon stretched out with the Force, scanning for life. The field was very large, and he could only pick up a trace of civilization. He began walking through the tall plants in that direction.

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Obi-Wan endured the thumb-prints, the mug-shot, and then was placed in another hard chair in the busy police station. He was getting tired of the strange and amused looks aimed his way. Now, three officers were questioning him. They were now calling him John Doe. Obi-Wan thought it a more idiotic name than anything else he?d heard, but left that to himself.

He?d explained several times what had happened, and they would either laugh, or get angry. He was being charged with trespassing, lying to the police, displaying false ID, fraud, and numerous other reasons to be arrested. Why was the fact he was a Jedi so funny?

The attire of this planet was rather peculiar, and he yearned to find someone in tunics or robes. He did note, however, that the blue uniforms hugged at some of the women officers? hips rather nicely. But he wasn?t here to observe such frivolous matters.

?Put him in a cell tonight. He?ll re-think everything. Lieutenant, get?em a uniform.?

Obi-Wan watched the petite woman scurry away, weaving through the cluttered mess of desks and counters. There were several criminals being ran through the same, slow procedure. He was not one of them, but they seemed to be treating him as if he was the best entertainment they?d had all day.

His handcuffs clinked as he scratched the red line on his wrist. This wasn?t the first time he?d been imprisoned, but Qui-Gon had usually known where he was, or what had happened. Plus, to top everything off, there was a really irritating itch in the middle of his back he couldn?t reach.

The women returned, another young officer behind her. She carried an orange cover-all that made Obi-Wan recoil. The young officer grinned. ?You?re right. He?s even nuts enough to grow that braid! Wow, and I thought little Jimmy was a freak.?

Obi-Wan?s eyes narrowed. Insult to a Padawan braid was practically a cardinal sin. The young man shut his mouth, blushing slightly. The lieutenant presented the uniform. ?As requested, sir.?

?Good??

His words were cut off by the lights flickering. A moment later the police station was engulfed in black.

It took a second later for chaos to erupt. Criminals, finding opportunity to escape, broke free; the officers struggling and shouting. Obi-Wan, using the Force, shoved the woman and cop against the wall, called for his lightsaber, which was sitting on the counter, and rushed through the bedlam. He was not going to help the criminals out, but he could certainly save himself. Qui-Gon may not approve of this (and in retrospect, neither would Obi-Wan), but desperate times called for desperate measures.

?***king power-failure again!? someone shouted.

Obi-Wan didn?t wait, finding the door and racing out into the deepening dusk. There was the crash of a window being broken, b

 

*giggle* Oh, this is GREAT! Obi as a delinquent; I love it! I also am getting so many laughs out of his impressions of Earth - - yes, John Doe is a stupid name. =) And Obi's breaking out! =P

Great job, Ami!

 

Yep! That's our Obi! Too bad the camera's won't catch his escape. That would be a real eye-opener.

>>>He did note, however, that the blue uniforms hugged at some of the women officers? hips rather nicely<<<<
LOL!!

 

Obi noticing the womens uniforms! heehee! Despite it all, he finds time to perv! lol!!! If I haven't said it before, I LOVE Obi's attitude in this! He's such a badasss!

aa

 

Ha Ha Ha Ha!!! Those poor cops, they must be totally frustrated with this.
I'm sitting here, dying!! My 9-year old son is giving me concered looks.
When, how and where does Ewan come into the story!?
This is sooo funny!!! Please post, soon. Thank you!!

 

Can't wait to see Obi watch 'Star Wars', I wonder what he'll think!!! Man, if they came to my house...*blush* I have a full size cardboard Obi-Wan, and Amidala! I have Obi's cloak, lightsaber, etc.... and LOTS more!!! I wonder what they would be thinking if they saw the stuff this world has of them. (I'm talking as if they're real people! ) But I guess we'll find out, won't we?!?!

MORE!!!!!!

 

Even worse (?) if they logged on to HERE and see what we've written about them!!! All that Obi-Torture!!! lol

aa

 

up! that was really good... "He's even crazy enough to grow the braid..." hmmf. can't wait for more.

--Mr. P