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Favorite Simpsons Quotes

Discussion in 'Milwaukee, WI' started by BYOB_Kenobi, Nov 4, 2002.

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  1. BYOB_Kenobi

    BYOB_Kenobi Jedi Master star 5

    Registered:
    Dec 7, 2000
    Go!



    [blockquote][ol][li]"I'm glad we're stranded. It'll be just like Swiss Family Robinson, only with a lot more cursing. We're gonna live like kings... damn hell ass kings!"[/li][/ol][/blockquote]
     
  2. Bishop76

    Bishop76 Jedi Youngling star 3

    Registered:
    Apr 1, 2002
    There are far too many, but I'll start off with these:

    Homer sings to himself (tune of the Flintstones): Simpson! Homer Simpson! He's the greatest guy in history. From the! Town of Springfield! He's about to hit a chestnut tree!

    McBain: My eyes! The goggles do nothing!

    Jeff
     
  3. ToxicNed

    ToxicNed Grand Poobah of Madison WI - FF CR star 4

    Registered:
    May 2, 2002
    ...and the doctor said I wouldn't have anymore nose bleeds, if I just kept my finger out of there.
     
  4. ToxicNed

    ToxicNed Grand Poobah of Madison WI - FF CR star 4

    Registered:
    May 2, 2002
    "If the Bible has taught us nothing else, and it hasn't, its that girls should stick to girl's sports, such as hot oil wrestling foxy boxy and such and such... "

    Another classic! :D
     
  5. SySnootles

    SySnootles Jedi Youngling star 3

    Registered:
    Apr 13, 2002
    Reverend Lovejoy: Marge, get a divorce.

    Marge Simpson: Bur Reverend, isn't divorce a sin?

    Reverend Lovejoy: (Holding up a Bible) Have you ever read this thing? Everything's a sin. Technically we're not allowed to go to the bathroom.
     
  6. SySnootles

    SySnootles Jedi Youngling star 3

    Registered:
    Apr 13, 2002
    Wayland Smithers: It's been my experience that women and seamen don't mix, sir.
     
  7. SySnootles

    SySnootles Jedi Youngling star 3

    Registered:
    Apr 13, 2002
    Priam, King of Troy (Ned Flanders): Now anytime someone gets wood, they'll think of Trojans!
     
  8. TheWampas1138

    TheWampas1138 Jedi Padawan star 4

    Registered:
    Apr 2, 2002
    Principal Skinner: You saved me! Now, chew through my ball sack.

    hamster: Errrr!?!

     
  9. SySnootles

    SySnootles Jedi Youngling star 3

    Registered:
    Apr 13, 2002
    Kodos: Well, if you wanted to make Sarek the Preparer cry, mission accomplished.
     
  10. SameSithDifferentDay

    SameSithDifferentDay Jedi Youngling star 3

    Registered:
    May 4, 2001
    Homer: "Me lose brain? Uh-oh. Ha ha ha. Why I laugh?"
     
  11. TheWampas1138

    TheWampas1138 Jedi Padawan star 4

    Registered:
    Apr 2, 2002
    Reverend Lovejoy: Now, as these are childrens' toys, they will burn quickly.

    --------------------

    Bart, as Ned's kids are playing a religious video game: Oh, you winged him, now he's just a Lutheran.


    Dwayne
     
  12. FennShysha

    FennShysha Jedi Youngling star 1

    Registered:
    Apr 29, 2002
    Ralph: I bent my wookie.

    Moe: I'm gonna go back in time and ge me some caveman hookers.

    To Comic Book Guy: Oh, a fat sarcastic Star Trek fan. You must be a real devil with the ladies.
     
  13. Auraveda

    Auraveda Jedi Padawan star 4

    Registered:
    Jun 5, 2001
    Here's 2:
    ******************************

    Apu: I have come to make amends, sir. At first, I blamed you for squealing, but then I realized, it was I who wronged you. So I have come to work off my debt. I am at your service.
    Homer: You're...selling what, now?
    Apu: I am selling only the concept of karmic realignment.
    Homer: You can't sell that! Karma can only be portioned out by the cosmos. (slams the door)
    Apu: He's got me there.

    ************************************

    Marge: Homer, it's very easy to criticize...
    Homer: and fun, too!
     
  14. TheWampas1138

    TheWampas1138 Jedi Padawan star 4

    Registered:
    Apr 2, 2002
    Moe: I wasn't gonna kill ya, just cut ya a little...

    ****************************

    Moe: I'm gonna cut off your tongue and use it to paint my boat.

    ************************

    Moe: I'm gonna stuff you with sausages and shove wild dogs up your butt.

    Dwayne
     
  15. Bishop76

    Bishop76 Jedi Youngling star 3

    Registered:
    Apr 1, 2002
    Milhouse, on falling in love: "It was just like Romeo and Juliet, only it ended in tragedy."

    Lisa: Mom, romance is dead. It was acquired in a hostile takeover by Hallmark and Disney, homogenized, then sold off piece by piece.

    Maude Flanders: "I've been going to Bible classes. They're teaching me to be more judgmental."

    Grandpa: "I'm an old man, no one listens to me."
    Lisa: "I'm a young girl, no one listens to me."
    Homer: "I'm a white male aged 18 to 49. Everyone listens to me, no matter how dumb my suggestions are."
    He then goes to the cabinet and takes out a can of food titled, "Nuts and Gum: Together At Last"

    Jeff
     
  16. CheddarJedi

    CheddarJedi Jedi Youngling star 1

    Registered:
    May 17, 2002
    Homer's toast: "To alcohol, the cause of - and solution to - all of life's problems."
     
  17. DarthMak

    DarthMak Jedi Grand Master star 5

    Registered:
    Jan 4, 2001
    Homer: Women will like what I tell them to like.
     
  18. JediMasterLambda

    JediMasterLambda Jedi Youngling star 1

    Registered:
    Oct 1, 2002
    Homer: I've always been an obese man trapped inside a fat man's body.

    Homer: DOH!

     
  19. JediMasterLambda

    JediMasterLambda Jedi Youngling star 1

    Registered:
    Oct 1, 2002
    Homer: HELP ME JEBUS!
     
  20. SameSithDifferentDay

    SameSithDifferentDay Jedi Youngling star 3

    Registered:
    May 4, 2001
    "God bless those pagans."
     
  21. JodoKast74

    JodoKast74 Jedi Padawan star 4

    Registered:
    Mar 10, 2001
    "Elmo knows where you live."
     
  22. solo414

    solo414 Jedi Padawan star 4

    Registered:
    Mar 28, 2002
    Anything out of Raplh's mouth

    "Good job, Nibbles! Now chew through my ball sack." Principle Skinner

    "Shut up, Becky!" Marge

    And there are really too many to count after those...TOO MANY. :D

     
  23. Bishop76

    Bishop76 Jedi Youngling star 3

    Registered:
    Apr 1, 2002
    This was just on, and it made me laugh aloud:

    Homer: Look, the thing about my family is there's five of us. Marge, Bart, Girl Bart, the one who doesn't talk, and the fat guy. How I loathe him!

    Jeff
     
  24. Bishop76

    Bishop76 Jedi Youngling star 3

    Registered:
    Apr 1, 2002
    Another zinger:

    Grampa Simpson (after consumating his marriage): Wanna give Honest Abe another turn in the oval office?

    Heheh

    Jeff
     
  25. solo414

    solo414 Jedi Padawan star 4

    Registered:
    Mar 28, 2002
    Sea Captain: "Yarg, I'm not attractive."

    Not nearly as funny without the voice, but still a hoot.
     
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