Saga Fett's Drabbles ("The Hammer of the Force" added October 30)

Oh lovely. I finally managed to read all these. I couldn't possibly pick a favorite though. I'd be sitting here for ages just to thin it down to my favorite n-1 (where n is the number of drabbles)



I will keep checking back for more as time goes on.

KD

 

Thanks, SP, LE, KA, and KD!

 

Title: Self-Defenestration for Dummies
Timeframe: AotC (AU)
Focus: Obi-Wan, Anakin


Obi-Wan saw the remote hovering beyond the window, and he knew what he had to do. With a great leap, he burst through the transparisteel and floated briefly over the city before wrapping his hands over the device.

He was quite surprised, though, when the pieces he held broke off. As he plummeted, he began to mutter, "That cheap piece of..."

* * *

Anakin leaped into the hottest airspeeder in the hangar and reached for the controls, but stopped when he saw what was stretched across them. "The Club?"

* * *

After several minutes' consideration, Obi-Wan made "My padawan's an idiot!" his final thought.

 

LMAO Drabbo!!

 

Oh geez. That's just..

 

Thanks.

 

LOL Oh heavens. A bit unfair on the lad though eh? He's not the one who jumped out a window a zillion stories up. Congrats on making me feel sympathy for Ani there. I'd love to know the other thoughts that were up for consideration as Obi-Wan's last...

KD

 

Title: Watch It Wiggle
Timeframe: inter-Trilogy
Focus: Ben


Ben sat on the rocky ground outside his hut and watched the yellow sand slowly turn pink; tonight would be a rare double sunset. As the red started to deepen, he felt a rippling, unfocused disturbance in the Force. In the distance, animals howled uneasily. Within moments, he understood the reason; while the tremors themselves were weak, they would reverberate among the cracked plates under the wastes for hours, kicking up the sand.

Still, he knew, there was no real danger. Unconcerned but curious, he sat back and watched the jiggling, cherry desert until night came and turned it black.

 

LOL! Proof that you've spent too much time among the crazies.

These are really quite funny.

 

LMAO Off! Loved that one Drabbo!

 

You're a lunatic and I love it. These last two were just great, Drabbo. So very glad we could all inspire you.

Shaindl

 

Oh, I was going for heartwarming and sentimental.

Opal, I was never that upset about not being voted prom queen.

EDIT: I resent being called nuts, Shaindl. I've been seeing a wonderful therapist for three years now. Okay, he's a pot of begonias, but he's really helped me.

EDIT Deux: And, of course, thanks.

EDIT Trois: I'd love to know the other thoughts that were up for consideration as Obi-Wan's last.

Most involved Coruscant Cup soccer. Apparently, he was a big Jed U fan. And it goes without saying that one was about you.

 

Hilarious work.

 

Thank you, LE and HL.

 

You make these look darn easy...

Ah, shucks. HL, do you think it would be okay if I started a drabble challenge on the Resource board?

 

brilliant

so many drabbles all to them brilliant

mad4dos

 

Thank you. For now I think I'd better lock this, so people don't mistake it for the challenge response thread.

 

Here are some of the challenge drabbles I did a few months back.

---

Title: In Broad Daylight
Timeframe: pre-RotS
Focus: Mace
Date: February 17, 2005

* * * * *

Mace didn't even blink as the assassin dropped onto his speeder's hood. He turned it into a steep dive, but she just stood there.

"Magnetic boots," she drawled, drawing her blaster.

"You don't want to do that," Mace whispered.

"Yeah," she said, "I do. Time to die, Jedi."

Mace rolled the speeder out of its dive. "I know." He veered toward a nearby tunnel and entered it high, its ceiling mere inches above his head. Of the assassin, only those ugly, rusted boots remained.

Mace stared at them and swore. This was definitely going to ruin his new paint job.

[hr]

Title: The Frozen Wastes
Timeframe: ESB
Focus: Luke, Crossover
Date: February 17, 2005

* * * * *

Luke could feel his strength draining as he pulled himself across the snow. He was barely conscious when he saw the shadowy form.

"Bob, get over here!"

A second shape joined the first. "Hey, Doug, what's he doing there, eh?"

"I think he's dead, eh," Doug said.

"No, you hoser. His eyes are still moving."

"You're the hoser, eh! That's electronical impulses or something," Doug explained. "Like when you ran over that dog with your snowmobile, and its leg kept twitching, eh?"

"Oh yeah, that reminds me, eh!" Bob said. "We gotta get home. They got curling on TV tonight."

[hr]

Title: Rude Awakening
Timeframe: post-Saga
Focus: Han, Leia
Date: February 20, 2005

* * * * *

"I ever tell you how beautiful you look in the morning?" Han asked. He leaned over to kiss Leia but stopped when he felt something between them under the covers. "We have company," he said, laughing.

He stopped laughing when he saw the blood. Leia leaped from the bed as Han yanked the covers away. When he saw the blank eyes and matted fur, he screamed, "Chewie! Chewie!"

Within seconds, the Wookiee stood in the doorway. "We told you," Han shouted, "to leave Fey'lya alone, didn't we? Don't give me that look, mister! You put his head in our bed!"

[hr]

Title: The Boss's Daughter
Timeframe: pre-TPM
Focus: Gungans
Date: February 23, 2005

* * * * *

It took Captain Binks longer to find the bongo than he'd expected; it was near a cliff far from where kids usually went. He tapped his light against the window.

"Oh, look," Nyss said in that affected accent that made her sound almost human, "it's Captain Puppet."

"Yousa father is..."

"My father," she interrupted, "is wasting army resources sending you after me."

"Yousa should be grateful he cares," Binks said.

"About his reputation, you mean."

Binks aimed his light at the bongo's interior, wondering what male would be so idiotic as to mess with Nass's daughter. "Jar Jar?"

"Hi, dad."

[hr]

Title: Resource Acquisition
Timeframe: pre-TPM
Focus: Xanatos, Crossover
Date: April 8, 2005

* * * * *

Xanatos cackled as the information came in over the holonet. Jinn and that new pup were on their way. He flipped on his comm. "Mevro, is the quad laser ready?"

"Umm, sir," the henchman stammered, "it kind of, well, exploded."

"What?"

* * *

Xanatos watched as the wooden crate was lowered into position. The sides dropped away, revealing the replacement weapon.

He ran his hands over the controls, pausing occasionally to pick out the bits of matted brown fur. They weren't always the cleanest, but Acme couldn't be beat when a villain needed a replacement quad laser, slightly used, in a hurry.

 

Title: Sixty-Six Candles
Timeframe: Clone Wars
Focus: Order 66 Challenge


The Jedi looked down his bill at the clone captain. "I could murder a curry."

"It will be done, M'Lord." The captain sent a trooper to fetch some takeout.

"It's pronounced M'Lard," the Jedi huffed. "I mean how long have we worked together?"

"Of course, sir."

M'Lard trained his macrobinoculars on the bluffs above them. "Never mind; I have a new plan I want you to execute. Order sixty-six men to take that ridge over..."

He felt a disturbance in the Force and looked around. Every trooper in the valley was staring at him, weapons raised and aimed. "Oh, quack."

 

LMAO!

 

*dies* You are so creative.

 

Thanks, both of you. I'm glad you liked it.

Oh, now I suppose I'm going to have to be the one to clean up Obaona's body. Why do people always come to my thread to die? Okay, I'll go get the quicklime and a hose. I'm so glad I never put down carpet.

EDIT: What am I saying? I put down carpet frequently. "That is some ugly carpet." See?

 

That's the problem with the galaxy these days, no one knows how to communicate properly.

 

It's not that, really. It's just that every once in a while, you need to be particularly careful how you phrase things.