Beyond Fidelis: Sorry (K/J) -- Chapter 9 up 16 May! (Completed!)

Discussion in 'Fan Fiction- Before, Saga, and Beyond' started by Dantana Skywalker, May 8, 2004.

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  1. Elfsheen Jedi Grand Master

    Member Since:
    Feb 9, 2003
    star 5
    Oh my that was brutal! Very good!

    Just one thing bugs me a little. Jaina's a jedi, she would have never put up with that, she would probably have done the same Kyp did in this post.

    Then again, characters are fun to work with!
  2. djcati Force Ghost

    Member Since:
    Mar 20, 2004
    star 4
    Wow. The Jag-fangirl in me now officially seems to be gone.
    Thank you. XD

    This was.. I mean, it is... I mean... I'm using the word "brilliant" too much lately, I need to find a new adjective.

    But now, I have to wait and wonder and try and concentrate on studying while not getting on unblocked net access and.. and...
    DON'T POST THE NEXT PART UNTIL THURSDAY NIGHT!!!
    Please? Please? Then I can read it straight away...
  3. Abby Force Ghost

    Member Since:
    Jan 7, 2004
    star 4
    Elfsheen - I see your point, but sometimes when the situation is rooted deeply in emotion, people become so unlike themselves, ie, when women who have always been strong individuals remain in an abusive marriage because they feel they can't get away.

    Jag has so abused Jaina that she's become emotionally weak, Jedi or not.

    Just a thought :)

    ~Abby~
  4. AvenKiel Jedi Master

    Member Since:
    Oct 18, 2003
    star 4
    For Jag, I feel no pity.
  5. hollynkesten Force Ghost

    Member Since:
    Mar 29, 2004
    star 3
    neither do i....you should havelet Kyp pummel him a little bit more!!!

    please post more soon!
  6. Babi_Tahiri Jedi Knight

    Member Since:
    Dec 29, 2003
    star 1
    Wow! "Seeing" Kyp beat Jag up like that was just awesome! You make it seem so.. so.. right! :D Can't wait for the last chapter and the sequel! (what's this, number 4? LOL)

    ~^~ Tahiri ~^~
  7. Dantana Skywalker Manager Emeritus

    Member Since:
    Apr 7, 2002
    star 5
    Elfsheen - Oh my that was brutal! Very good!

    Thank you.

    Just one thing bugs me a little. Jaina's a jedi, she would have never put up with that, she would probably have done the same Kyp did in this post.

    It's difficult for those who have not experienced what Jaina went through during her marriage to understand why she is reacting to him now. I've never been in her position, and I hope I never will.

    The way I see it is this:

    Jaina cared for Jag. She cared for him very much. She just didn't love him as much as she later realised she loves Kyp. And she had no way to leave him, felt guilty for marrying him . . . and things kept getting worse and worse. He probably had her convinced it was her fault; it's a common tactic ("I made him hit me.") of the abuser to force the blame onto the victim.

    Generally, feelings of love, obligation, and/or dependence keep the victim tied to the abuser until the victim either realises they need to get out, or, unfortunately, the abuser kills the victim. Alcohol consumption is frequently a factor, especially among addictive personalities, because it impairs judgement and "desactivates" the inhibitors that keep us at a more civilised level of interaction.

    In Jaina's case, she was infatuated with Jag and mistook that for genuine love. She really did care for him . . . she just wasn't in love with him. But the time she realised it, she was on Csilla, and had been married for some time. She also had no way off-planet. She felt bad because she didn't love Jag, and so she stayed with him. He became more distant, behaving coldly towards her, and that compounded her guilt, especially when he told her that it was her fault. The physical abuse came later, and she probably managed to block it from her memory, effectively erasing it until she met Jag again after several years.

    Incidentally, abusers generally put on a very nice front, acting very kind, courteous, are romantic and sweep the victim off their feet. Once they have what they want, they let their "true" side show. It happens frequently; it happened with my mother. And some men have a completely different view on how their girlfriend should act from how their wife should act. Until they're married, she's still her own person, but as soon as they're married, she's a possession for him to do with as he pleases.

    And to think that even up until 50 years ago, this kind of behaviour from men was overlooked, even encouraged.

    Then again, characters are fun to work with!

    Yes they are. :D


    djcati - Wow. The Jag-fangirl in me now officially seems to be gone.
    Thank you. XD


    LOL!

    This was.. I mean, it is... I mean... I'm using the word "brilliant" too much lately, I need to find a new adjective.

    I can suggest a couple thesaruses . . . ;)

    But now, I have to wait and wonder and try and concentrate on studying while not getting on unblocked net access and.. and...
    DON'T POST THE NEXT PART UNTIL THURSDAY NIGHT!!!


    Sorry, I'm posting chapter 9 whenever I get it finished, which will probably be tonight (Sunday).

    Please? Please? Then I can read it straight away...

    Hey, it's not going anywhere!


    Abby - Elfsheen - I see your point, but sometimes when the situation is rooted deeply in emotion, people become so unlike themselves, ie, when women who have always been strong individuals remain in an abusive marriage because they feel they can't get away.

    Yes, exactly. there are any number of reasons why a person will stay with an abuser. Jaina, however, finally got away from him.

    Jag has so abused Jaina that she's become emotionally weak, Jedi or not.

    She could be suffering from PTSS (post-traumatic shock syndrome), which would make her mentally revert back to the trauma itself when confronted with reminders. It's common in soldiers who've been to war, victims of rape and molestation, and any number of other things.

    Just a thought

    A correct one. :)



    AvenKiel - For Jag, I feel no pity
  8. Dantana Skywalker Manager Emeritus

    Member Since:
    Apr 7, 2002
    star 5
    Not quite satisfied with this, but . . . Hey, there's the sequel!


    --Chapter Nine--

    I would not sleep
    In this bed of lies
    So toss me out and turn in
    And there'll be no rest
    For these tired eyes
    I'm marking it down to learning
    I'm marking it down to learning
    'Cause I can

    -- Matchbox Twenty, "Bed Of Lies"


    The garden was quiet, the only sound the window rustling through the imported flowers and some insect chirping in the moonlight. The air was filled with the rich scent of the Alderaani blooms on a nearby bush.

    "Couldn't sleep either, huh?"

    Jaina looked up. Kyp smiled down at her, warm but cautious.

    "Mind if I join you?"

    After a moment, she smiled back, faintly, and nodded, motioning to the place beside her on the bench.

    "How did you know I'd be here?" she asked as he sat down.

    "Well . . . it didn't take a genius." His wavy hair fell forward, obscuring his face from her view. "I have very fond memories of this garden."

    Her face reddened. "So do I," she whispered.

    For a while, they sat in silence, Jaina holding her hands in her lap.

    Finally, Jaina cleared her throat and said quietly, "Thank you for what you did. With Jag. I . . . Force, I'm such a wimp."

    Kyp turned to her, taking her hands. "No. No, you're not a wimp. You are the bravest woman I have ever met in my life."

    "Including Mom, and Mara?"

    "Including them. They fought wars, just like you've fought, but they haven't faced abuse and walked away from it like you have. It took real courage to leave him, Jaina."

    She glanced over to see him looking at her. "I know. That's what Aunt Mara said."

    "For once, she and I agree on something." Kyp rubbed his thumb over her knuckles. "Why didn't you tell me what he did to you? If I'd had any idea, I would have taken you away from there."

    "Like when you went to rescue Wurth?" she asked, not meeting his gaze, looking instead at the night sky.

    "I got in to rescue him," he said. "I fought my way in, and I fought my way out. I just didn't get to him in time. Nothing would have stopped me from getting to you, Jaina."

    "Nothing except that I kept silent."

    "One word and I would have been there in an instant. Partners, remember? As long as we need each other. And I'm going to need you for a very, very long time."

    She sighed.

    "Look, I . . . I know that you were pregnant, and you . . . lost the child."

    Jaina cut her eyes up at him. "Jag tell you that?"

    "No, I, uh . . . pulled it out of him, actually." He looked a little embarrassed, but not because he'd done it, rather that he'd completely lost control. "I'm sorry."

    she sighed again, heavily. "I'm not. I . . . I was so happy at first, with him, until I realised one day, while I was sitting at the desk, sending thank you notes to people I didn't even know who had given us wedding presents, when I realised that I'd made a horrible mistake. Csilla wasn't where I belonged. But I couldn't leave him like that. I hoped that, maybe, it was just a phase I was going through, or something, that I'd fall in love with him again. But it didn't happen, and then he found out how I felt about you . . . I thought that a baby would . . . make things better. I don't know."

    Jaina picked at a stray thread on her clothing. "I've always wanted a family. And I was happy when I got pregnant. I thought it would fix things, and we could be happy and he would . . . stop hurting me, if he knew I was pregant with his child. But . . . he didn't see it that way. He actually accused me of cheating on him, and he slapped me. I fell down. It wasn't that bad of a fall, I mean, it wasn't like he'd pushed me down the stairs or anything . . . I lost my balance and fell over the end table. But I lost the baby. I miscarried in the infirmary."

    She looked up at him, a faint sparkle in her eyes from unshed tears. "It was when I was lying in the med centre that I realised that . . . I really didn't want a baby with him. It would have kept me tied to him. And I couldn't stay any longer, because eventually, he'd />
  9. SaberBlade Force Ghost

    Member Since:
    Sep 19, 2001
    star 3
    Argh, that's such a cliffhanger. So not fair. Can't wait for the sequel, though. I really want to see how Jailyn's going to come to terms with "Mommy" vs. Jaina, who's also nice to him.

    And she's thinking about it!! Yay!!

    -Saber
  10. Dantana Skywalker Manager Emeritus

    Member Since:
    Apr 7, 2002
    star 5
    SaberBlade - Argh, that's such a cliffhanger. So not fair. Can't wait for the sequel, though.

    That was hardly a cliffhanger! :p

    I really want to see how Jailyn's going to come to terms with "Mommy" vs. Jaina, who's also nice to him.

    Could be interesting. Don't think I'm going to delve much into that, though. Jailyn isn't the focus.

    And she's thinking about it!! Yay!!

    Well, DUH! [face_laugh]


    Dana
  11. Abby Force Ghost

    Member Since:
    Jan 7, 2004
    star 4
    Nice ending, Dana.

    She is going to marry him, right???

    And I think Jailyn will be fine with it, since he did ask Jaina to be his mommy :D

    ~Abby~
  12. Dantana Skywalker Manager Emeritus

    Member Since:
    Apr 7, 2002
    star 5
    Abby - Nice ending, Dana.

    Thanks. :D

    She is going to marry him, right???

    Well, I WOULD say, "Hey, it's me!" but given the first three in this series . . .

    And I think Jailyn will be fine with it, since he did ask Jaina to be his mommy

    Hee hee, right!


    Dana
  13. AvenKiel Jedi Master

    Member Since:
    Oct 18, 2003
    star 4
    That was really good! I'd love to see more interaction with Kyp and Jailynn!
  14. Elfsheen Jedi Grand Master

    Member Since:
    Feb 9, 2003
    star 5
    Ohhh semi-happy ending! Good good!

    *hops down on the next fic*

    Great ending!
  15. JediMasterKobe Jedi Master

    Member Since:
    Apr 10, 2003
    star 4
    Excellent fic, Dana. I especially loved when Kyp beat the snot out of Mr. Pizza Box.
  16. Babi_Tahiri Jedi Knight

    Member Since:
    Dec 29, 2003
    star 1
    Awwwww. Well, you know what I'm gonna say because I've said it so many times before, but here goes anyways. Great ending to a great fic. I really can't wait to see how you end the series. :D

    ~^~ Tahiri ~^~
  17. hollynkesten Force Ghost

    Member Since:
    Mar 29, 2004
    star 3
    wellllll... you can post the sequel now! please... loved the last post... and uggg... i hate Jag (well in this story at least) .. please get the sequel up soon!
  18. Dantana Skywalker Manager Emeritus

    Member Since:
    Apr 7, 2002
    star 5
    AvenKiel - That was really good! I'd love to see more interaction with Kyp and Jailynn!

    The sequel is probably going to focus entirely on Kyp and Jaina, but I might slip something in.


    Elfsheen - Ohhh semi-happy ending! Good good!

    Yeah . . . angst wears on you.

    Great ending!

    Thank you.


    JediMasterKobe - Excellent fic, Dana. I especially loved when Kyp beat the snot out of Mr. Pizza Box.

    Thanks. :) Me, too. :D


    Babi_Tahiri - Awwwww. Well, you know what I'm gonna say because I've said it so many times before, but here goes anyways. Great ending to a great fic. I really can't wait to see how you end the series. [i/]

    Neither can I. ;)


    hollynkesten - wellllll... you can post the sequel now! please... loved the last post... and uggg... i hate Jag (well in this story at least) .. please get the sequel up soon!

    It was actually surprisingly hard for me to make Jag the villain, which was disconcerting.

    Not sure when the sequel will be up. Probably not for a while. I need to find the right song first.

    Dana
  19. djcati Force Ghost

    Member Since:
    Mar 20, 2004
    star 4
    Hey, it's not going anywhere!

    Yeah, but.. but... I had to search for it!
    It was on page FIVE!!
    PAGE FIVE!!!!!!!!!
    That's... like.... bad.

    And it was really goooood, and I really looooved it.... and... I hope you find a song for the sequel soon!

    And I left my thesaurus at school now. So I can't find a new adjective. *sigh* Guess I'll have to stick to brilliant. :p
  20. Abby Force Ghost

    Member Since:
    Jan 7, 2004
    star 4
    How about

    ~wonderful

    ~fantastic

    ~excellent

    ~supurb

    ~splendid

    ~terrific

    Just thought I'd help out djcati :D
  21. cleveland1000 Jedi Knight

    Member Since:
    Mar 15, 2004
    star 2
    great story Dantana! i laughed i almost cried and of course said kick ass after reading the part where kyp beat the living sh!t out of jag.
  22. Dantana Skywalker Manager Emeritus

    Member Since:
    Apr 7, 2002
    star 5
    djcati - Yeah, but.. but... I had to search for it!
    It was on page FIVE!!
    PAGE FIVE!!!!!!!!!
    That's... like.... bad.


    Well, the K/J index is around so you don't HAVE to search for stories. :)

    And it was really goooood, and I really looooved it.... and... I hope you find a song for the sequel soon!

    Thank you. :)

    And I left my thesaurus at school now. So I can't find a new adjective. *sigh* Guess I'll have to stick to brilliant. :p

    Heh. :)


    Abby - How about

    ~wonderful

    ~fantastic

    ~excellent

    ~supurb

    ~splendid

    ~terrific

    Just thought I'd help out djcati


    LOL!


    cleveland1000 - great story Dantana! i laughed i almost cried and of course said kick ass after reading the part where kyp beat the living **** out of jag.

    See? I said you'd like it. :)



    Oh, and I'm about to post the PREQUEL to this series, titled "Fidelis".


    Dana
  23. kyps_godess Jedi Knight

    Member Since:
    Jan 23, 2004
    star 1
    i love this the whole series is soooo well writen!

    i just read the prequal n it helps to sort stuff out but i think to read the story then read the prequeal is better cos it makes it much better when kyp comes to beat the crap out of pretty boy ice block!

    but anyway can't wait for the next part!!!
    i have saved it to disc to get my friend to read it as her net is down and the bloody school has the force blocked for some wierd reason soooooo......

    more soon please?

    kyps godess
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