Discussion in 'Fan Fiction- Before, Saga, and Beyond' started by Jedi-Gon, Mar 26, 2008.
I sense a terrible time for Obi-Wan.
At least he has Guerra to keep him company
I'm glad to see Obi has a friend in prison.
Hopefully that will make his time there a little bit better.
I certainly hope Qui finds something...anything on those security tapes
Poor Obi! I'm glad Guerra is there, but I hope Qui-Gon can get him out soon!
That was brilliant, thanks for the PM!
Aww, that was so sad when the police dude took Obi-Wan's river stone.
I'm glad Tahl is helping Qui-Gon, hopefully they can figure this whole sad mess out, eventually.
But I'm so glad Obi-Wan has a friend in prison. I wonder how Guerra ended up in there?
That was a great update, Jedi-Gon. Can't wait for more!
Great job with this. I'm looking forward to the next chapter. Please add me to the pm list.
It's good that Obi-Wan is sharing his cell with a friend. Hopefully that will make his time there more bearable. Maybe Guerra could find a way to get Obi-Wan's river stone back.
It's good that Qui-Gon has Tahl to help him find evidence of Obi-Wan's innocence.
Yes, I'm back. After a very, very extended absence, I am back. First off, it's all DRL's fault. A.k.a. I was finishing up my school year. (Summer is here, at long last!)
Anyway, without further ado, I give you chapter number five of 'For Good':
Obi-Wan sat awake on his bed, his knees pulled up to his chest, his chin sitting comfortably on his kneecaps. Contraire to the past few days, he wasn?t mulling over his despair, sorrow, or disappointment. He wasn?t weeping, for which he was glad, and he wasn?t having nightmares. The mattress wasn?t the thing that kept him awake, either. Though it was thin and rubbery, Obi-Wan was used to falling asleep practically anywhere and everywhere. No, Obi-Wan was awake on his own accord. He was simply thinking.
He and Guerra had talked for hours, earlier. Apparently, this wasn?t a strictly juvenile prison. Guerra was one of many adults that were held there. Due to the over-full prisons throughout the rest of Coruscant, the officials had started ignoring the ?juvenile? title of the prison.
He also learned why Guerra was even his roommate. The story was quite comical, actually. Apparently, Guerra had, as a last resort to fill an empty stomach, stopped at a small local bar. He said that he had ordered a small breakfast roll and a glass of juice, but, in true Guerra style, had also decided to get a drink. Later that day, he was in a speeder collision. It wasn?t extremely serious, Guerra had said, but Obi-Wan had nearly snorted to himself when his Phindarian friend then added that his speeder had been totaled. Unfortunately for Guerra, when the authorities showed up, he tested positive for alcohol. He was now doing small time for driving while intoxicated. Guerra had heavily emphasized how he wasn?t drunk, and how it wasn?t his fault. Obi-Wan had managed to refrain from rolling his eyes, and simply shook his head fondly.
Obi-Wan smiled as he remembered the friendly, yet reckless smile on Guerra?s aging features as he had told the tale. He was a kind man. A scoundrel, yes, strange, yes, but he was honest. Obi-Wan smiled some more, but it faded soon. He recalled what Guerra had told him after the story was over. He was leaving. Tomorrow. His two-week long sentence would be over, and he would be released. Obi-Wan gulped sub-consciously. Where would that leave him?
Obi-Wan paused, his mind analyzing the prospect. Either he would have this cell to himself, or he would get another cellmate. He bit his lip. And somehow, he had the feeling that if he got another roommate, and said roommate leaned that he was a former Jedi, things would not be pretty. He didn?t know, of course. It was just a feeling. But he was trained to run on feelings. After all, the Force-
Obi-Wan suddenly cursed. Darn them! His hand shot up to his neck, suddenly remembering that sith-blasted chip. No good, Force forsaken, nerf-faced, bloody scoundrels! The padawan refrained from letting out a string of huttiese curses. Nothing could be easy, could it? Obi-Wan realized with a slightly sick stomach that he couldn?t rely on his feelings anymore. He couldn?t count on anything. Or anyone; besides Guerra that is. He trusted him. But, even as very low-sunk and untrusting thoughts ran through his mind, one thought in particular blared out at Obi-Wan.
This completely and utterly sucked.
Meanwhile, two Jedi Masters were deviating like the padawans they were in their youth. Bantering, bickering, and somehow getting something, however illegal it was, accomplished.
Qui-Gon casually glanced side to side in an observing manner, masking his attentive scan of the room with a lazy browsing of his surroundings. Once he was sure no one was paying too much attention to the dull gray door in the corner, he headed for it. Ignoring the ?Authorized Personnel Only? sign that was plastered to the door, Qui-Gon passed through it and into a long hallway, turning his deliberate walk into a smaller hallway that had wires of all sorts snaking across its walls.
I didn't think you had updated, I'm glad I checked!
That's sad that Guerra is leaving Obi soon, and I'm worried about who his next cellmate will be.
I wonder what sort of plan Tahl and Qui-Gon have come up with. I love the banter between those two.
That was so sad and sweet about the bead, I'm glad Obi found it. I really hope no one takes it away!
At least Obi's rock is now in a safe place.
I'm so glad you posted more of this wonderful story, Jedi-Gon!
I'm loving this story. Please update soon! I'm anxious to see how Qui-Gon reacts to receiving Obi-Wan's stone.
You have me waiting on edge for the next chapter!
I loved it!
Very, very nice job.
YAY! I am so glad I decided to check this. Poor Obi-Wan. At least he still has the bead. I can't wait until Qui-Gon proves him innocent.
That was so sad that Obi-Wan made a braid out of cloth. Poor kid. Hopefully, they will solve the mystery and find out how to get Obi-Wan out.
Good gracious, has it been that long since I updated?! I'm so sorry, everyone!
THUNK! Thunkthunk THUNK! Thunkthunk THUNK! Thunkthunk...
Really, Obi-Wan had never been so bored as this. Now he could see why being locked in a cell was punishment. It was down right boring.
THUNK! Thunkthunk THUNK!
Currently, he was playing with a ball he had gotten from the rec center. It was particularity bouncy, and rebounding the small object off the yellow wall was one of the only sources of entertainment that Obi-Wan found to occupy his time. Guerra was sitting in his bunk, reading, and hardly seemed to notice Obi-Wan's rather noisy game. Off-handedly, Obi-Wan wondered if it was possible to die from boredom. Wearily, he stopped bouncing his ball and leaned his head back against the wall that was at his back. Lazily rolling his head from side to side, Obi-Wan refrained from groaning. He could feel the neurons in his brain melting into mush... Bland, useless, lifeless mush...
?Obawan?? Guerra asked. Obi-Wan rolled his head over to look at the phindarian. He made a response that sounded something along the lines of 'Hrmmphm?'
?You remember I am leaving today, Obawan.? Guerra said solemnly. Obi-Wan sat to attention at once. Dear Force, he was right! Slowly, he sunk back down. So now he was going to bored and lonely.
?Oh. Yeah.? Obi-Wan said. Guerra deftly leaped down from his bunk. He sat down next to Obi-Wan, and placed a large hand on his shoulder.
?Will you be alright??
Obi-Wan sighed. ?I suppose so. I don't really have a choice, anyway.? Obi-Wan's heart sunk, once again, reminded that he would most likely spend the remainder of his life in this cell. Lonely, friendless, and bored out of his mind for the rest of his life. Obi-Wan set his jaw. He had to get out of here.
Obi-Wan glanced over at a piece of paper that sat on their bookshelf. He had an idea. He rose slowly, and went to retrieve it and a pencil.
?May I use this?? He asked Guerra. His friend nodded. Obi-Wan sat down and started to write. Doing the best he could, without the Force, Obi-Wan wracked his mind for all memory of the fight between him and Bruck. Perhaps, if he could remember something about the fight that he hadn't before, he could get out of here... Maybe. Obi-Wan's hand paused, and he closed his eyes. He didn't have the Force, but he had his Jedi-trained memory. He had seen Bant ? she was drowning. He had tried to convince Bruck to stop... Bruck had attacked him. He defended himself. He had taken the offensive to drive Bruck back towards the waterfall. The power systems had turned back on... Bruck's lightsaber had malfunctioned. He threw rocks... Then he slipped. Obi-Wan tried to catch him... He couldn't. He had gone down to the bank, where Bruck had landed. He was dead. He could remember checking his pulse, his breath... Nothing. Obi-Wan had moved Bruck's arm off of his lightsaber, which was under it, in the water. Wait. Obi-Wan focused on the memory. Bruck's lightsaber. It had a strange mark on it. It had a switch that shouldn't have been there. Maybe that could help. Obi-Wan's eyes opened. He looked around the cell room. Oh, who was he kidding? A switch on a lightsaber? How in the name of the Force was that supposed to get him out of here? Sighing, Obi-Wan started to write it down anyway. It was better than nothing. That is, unless it was nothing.
As he wrote, Obi-Wan could hear guards coming. Most likely for Guerra. His writing increased in speed. Quickly, he folded the piece of paper up and handed it to Guerra.
?Guerra, can you get this to Qui-Gon, once you get out?? Guerra nodded
?I will do everything I can, Obawan.?
Obi-Wan forced a smile. ?Thank you.?
The footsteps drew closer. Obi-Wan could see shadows from around the corner. ?You'll take care of yourself on Phindar??
?Who, me, Obawan?? Guerra pointed to himself. ?I'm not going back to Phindar. Not so! I lie.? Guerra smiled, but then sobered. ?I shall. I will tell Paxxi 'hi' for you.?
Third... I love you. You were like a father to me, when I needed it most. Thank you, Master.
Great update - and I guess I missed the last one because I was out of town at the time, so two great updates!
poor Obi and Qui
I hope they find the evidence they need to prove Obi's innocence. I'm sure they will Qui and Tahl are a good team. Tahl the investigative expert of the Temple and Qui with his stubborn determination not to let Obi continue to rot in jail when he is not guilty!
Poor Obi! The letter was heart-wrenching but I loved it! Please let Qui find a way to help Obi soon. Thanks for updating and I'm looking forward to more
Valairy_Scot - Thanks! Glad you got two updates. So here's another one for ya'! Thanks for reading!
JediMasterAmanda - Tahl and Qui-Gon do make a pretty good team, don't they? Brains and pure stubbornness. Somehow, that has to work. Thanks for reading!
dimyavie - Hmm... Well, It looks like Qui-Gon has his own plans to help Obi-Wan.... But he doesn't want me spoiling those for you. Thanks for reading!
Hot, freshly-typed update, coming right up!
A/N: Well, after I've made y'all wait a long while, more than a month now, I've finally decided to update. I've been stuck on this chapter for about five months now, but yesterday, I had a revelation. (While taking a shower, of all things) and got myself in gear to update! I've cooked this one up, and hope it's good, without too many typos. Enjoy!
Just as the morning sun was reaching the height of noon over Coruscant, the streets and airways busy as ever, Qui-Gon Jinn sat quietly in his living room, seated across from Tahl. With his blind friend silently listening to him, he explained the possible lead that Obi-Wan had given to him.
?Bruck?s lightsaber?? Tahl asked, a bit surprised.
?Yes. That?s what he said, at least.? Qui-Gon replied simply.
?You sound unconvinced.? Qui-Gon added.
?Well,? Tahl started, ?I suppose it?s possible, but??
?It?s a bit outlandish? Qui-Gon, if you?re looking for hard evidence??
?Tahl,? Qui-Gon interrupted, ?I need all the evidence I can get my hands on. Even the outlandish.?
?I don?t know, Qui-Gon?? Tahl seemed a bit apprehensive about the whole thing.
?Please, Tahl?? Qui-Gon pleaded. ?I have a feeling about this one. I need all of the evidence I can get. And I need your help to get it.
After a moment, Tahl sighed. ?Alright.? She said, resigned to help her friend hunt down evidence once more.
?Thank you, my friend.? He said, smiling. In place of a meaningful look, he gave Tahl?s hand a sqeeze. ?Now.? Qui-Gon said. ?To find it.?
?What?? Tahl said, shocked. ?You want to investigate it as a possible piece of evidence, and you don?t even know where it is?!? She said incredulously. Qui-Gon had to admit ? said aloud like that, it did make him look rather stupid.
?Well?? He tried to explain himself, ??no, I don?t.? Though Tahl couldn?t have seen him, Qui-Gon looked thoughtful for a moment. ?But I think I know someone who probably does.?
?A padawan? What, was he Bruck?s friend?? Tahl asked after Qui-Gon had explained.
?No.? Qui-Gon replied, as the two walked down the halls of the Temple together. ?He?s padawan to Master Zjeno, who is in charge of the initiate salles.? As he explained, Tahl appeared to understand. ?As Zjeno?s padawan, he is in co-charge of all of the initiate sabers in the salles ? including Bruck?s.? Suddenly, Qui-Gon stopped at an open doorway. Tahl stopped with him, though quite confused. ?Alright.? Qui-Gon informed his blind friend, ?He?s right over there, past the saber racks. Now, all you need to is go up and ask him if he knows where-?
?Wait, me?? Tahl interrupted. ?Why me?? She asked.
?Well?? Qui-Gon sighed, ?Don?t you think it might look off if the Master of a recently convicted murderer goes looking for the lightsaber of the boy that said murderer supposedly murdered??
Tahl just stood there for a moment, but then, seeing the sense in his words, sighed. ?Fine.? She said, walking off, muttering something inaudible to herself.
He watched her for a moment, but couldn?t clearly hear what was being said between Tahl and the padawan. Patiently, he stood and waited for her to return. After a few moments of silence, he could hear murmured goodbyes, and soon Tahl rounded the corner. Something in her face told him that things weren?t as he had hoped. His jaw tensed as he waited for her to report her findings.
?Bruck?s lightsaber isn?t here.? Tahl said simply, promptly. Qui-Gon resisted the urge to sigh in frustration. ?In fact,? She said, ?I?d bet that it?s several hundred light years away, by now.?
?What?? Qui-Gon insisted sharply.
?It left on a ship bound for Bruck?s homeworld yesterday.? Tahl explained. ?It should arrive there sometime tomorrow afternoon.? She said. ?The council is giving Bruck?s out-of-commission lightsaber to his father.?
Qui-Gon pressed his lips together in a fine line as he wracked his brains for ideas. Of course, with his luck, a potentially crucial piece of evid
Well, possibly?? Tahl said slowly. ?Qui-Gon, what are you getting at?? She asked, trying to read his intentions. ?I haven?t let loose the reckless monster again, have I?? Her voice was uneasy.
?I?ll be careful, I promise.? Qui-Gon said with earnesty.
Aw, I loved the Qui/Obi hugs. Great to see an update on this.
ah, good. We are moving along.
Happy that you have updated.
At least one guard at the prison has some compassion.
I'm glad he took the rock to the Temple instead of trying to get it back to Obi-Wan.
I loved how Obi treasures his padawan bead
Now if he can only keep anyone from finding it...
I just found your story, it is awesome. You have me hooked
I can't wait for the next chapter.
Obi Wan seems to be in one of his worst predicament. I hope that
Master Jinn fines the clues to get Obi Wan released.
Then, go after the people that doctored the evidence.
edited for typo
Found this. Loved it! Post soon, Jedi-Gon!
sweet update. glad to see things are looking up