For My Soul is Touched and I am Hollow (JA AU Obi/Qui/ now Xan) COMPLETE 5/26/04

Discussion in 'Fan Fiction Stories--Classic JC Board (Reply-Only)' started by Jedi_Suzuran, Nov 5, 2002.

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  1. Cascadia Jedi Master

    Member Since:
    Apr 15, 2002
    star 4
    They have to repair their bond, don't they? I love the unease and distance between them.

    Great post. Please keep going! :)
  2. maramijade Jedi Master

    Member Since:
    Feb 17, 2000
    star 4
    awwwww poor guys. . .

    sniff. . .


    :D
    Great stuff JS!
  3. Arwen-Jade_Kenobi Jedi Grand Master

    Member Since:
    Feb 9, 2002
    star 5
  4. Jedi_Suzuran Jedi Grand Master

    Member Since:
    May 22, 2002
    star 5
    Master:
    What in tarnation just happened Padawan? You have some explaining to do!

    Hate to tell ya, but it ain't coming any time soon. [face_devil]

    DOT:
    Lunkhead is asking like his true self! Can I shoot him?

    Is he? Hmm. And what is it about you and shooting characters, DOT? First Anakin, now Qui.

    *shakes head*

    Cas:
    They have to repair their bond, don't they? I love the unease and distance between them.

    Well...I'm not saying anything. Thanks for liking, though. :)

    maramijade:
    awwwww poor guys. . .

    sniff. . .


    [face_devil]

    Arwen:
    more!!!!

    It's coming.

    No update today. I'm taking my time on this, since it'll be on the long side, and I need to work out a major plot point (yes, it has a plot now :p ) and make it believable.

    Probably no update for a couple of days, if the words don't flow.

    Thanks, everyone. :)
  5. Jedi_Knight_Hunter Jedi Master

    Member Since:
    Jun 6, 2002
    star 4
    Well, It sure didn't take the buckethead long to reveal his inner moron now did it?
  6. Arwen-Jade_Kenobi Jedi Grand Master

    Member Since:
    Feb 9, 2002
    star 5
  7. Drunk_on_Tang Jedi Knight

    Member Since:
    Jul 21, 2002
    star 3
    Didnt you know Im a member of the kick lunkhead and the brat club?

    Once again, this is incredible. Not only do you have this way of writing the unlovable lunkhead in a way that makes him lovable, you are also now showing him in his normal, unlovable character! And I love the way you write the training bond!

    ~Dot
  8. Nikita Jedi Knight

    Member Since:
    Oct 14, 2001
    star 3
    oh no!!! The bond shattered!?!?! how come? I need answers!!!! Hurry up with another post!!!!


    ~*Nik*~
  9. Lieutenant_Page Jedi Master

    Member Since:
    Mar 17, 2001
    star 4
    I just found this fic..and I'm liking it so far :)

    I like the way you portray both Obi-Wan Qui-Gon so far... hurry up..I want more ;) :)
  10. Sreya Force Ghost

    Member Since:
    Aug 7, 2000
    star 2
    My goodness, something terrible really did happen to them, didn't it.

    For some strange reason, this has sent my imagination off chasing after a strange Yoda scene, in which he's grumbling at the humidity of Dagobah and wistfully longing for the air-conditioned Temple, then berating himself for weakness... don't ask me, I can't figure out how my mind works either!

    Sreya
  11. PadawanKitara Force Ghost

    Member Since:
    Dec 31, 2001
    star 5
    I tll9oks like they are going to have to work very hard to bring things back to normal.
  12. Sheila Force Ghost

    Member Since:
    Oct 6, 2002
    star 4
    :_| Poor Obi-Wan. He is just a kid in the fic and he is lonely. Sometimes I just want to scream at Qui-Gon when he forgets that first and foremost Obi-Wan is a child not just a Jedi. I wonder what happened to the bond. Hopefully it can be fixed.

    Good job JS! :D
  13. Jedi_Suzuran Jedi Grand Master

    Member Since:
    May 22, 2002
    star 5
    JKH:
    Well, It sure didn't take the buckethead long to reveal his inner moron now did it?

    Now, now, he's as confused as Obi. :)

    Arwen:
    Long = good

    :D

    DOT:
    Didnt you know Im a member of the kick lunkhead and the brat club?

    No, but thanks for telling me. :p

    Once again, this is incredible. Not only do you have this way of writing the unlovable lunkhead in a way that makes him lovable, you are also now showing him in his normal, unlovable character! And I love the way you write the training bond!

    You really have it in for Qui, don't you? :p Thanks, DOT.

    Nikita:
    oh no!!! The bond shattered!?!?! how come? I need answers!!!! Hurry up with another post!!!!

    All in good time. Thanks for reading, and answers will come...eventually. [face_devil]

    Lieutenant_Page:
    I just found this fic..and I'm liking it so far

    I like the way you portray both Obi-Wan Qui-Gon so far... hurry up..I want more


    *does another happy dance at a new reader*

    Thanks for taking the time to read this! :D [face_love]

    Sreya:
    My goodness, something terrible really did happen to them, didn't it.

    For some strange reason, this has sent my imagination off chasing after a strange Yoda scene, in which he's grumbling at the humidity of Dagobah and wistfully longing for the air-conditioned Temple, then berating himself for weakness... don't ask me, I can't figure out how my mind works either!


    Um...that's confusing, Sreya. :p ;)

    PK:
    I tll9oks like they are going to have to work very hard to bring things back to normal.

    Oh yes. [face_devil]

    Sheila:
    Poor Obi-Wan. He is just a kid in the fic and he is lonely. Sometimes I just want to scream at Qui-Gon when he forgets that first and foremost Obi-Wan is a child not just a Jedi. I wonder what happened to the bond. Hopefully it can be fixed.

    You shall see, eventually. :)

    Thanks all. Still working on it. I'll let you know when I'm about to post.
  14. Cascadia Jedi Master

    Member Since:
    Apr 15, 2002
    star 4
  15. Lieutenant_Page Jedi Master

    Member Since:
    Mar 17, 2001
    star 4
  16. Jedi_Suzuran Jedi Grand Master

    Member Since:
    May 22, 2002
    star 5
    Thanks for the ups, Cas and Lieutenant_Page. :)

    There is a post later today! Finally!
  17. Jedi_Suzuran Jedi Grand Master

    Member Since:
    May 22, 2002
    star 5
    At last, the post!

    BTW, updates for this fic will now be coming once a week, maybe twice, if I'm lucky. I'm going slowly on this, as I said before, because it needs a great deal of attention. It's important to me that I get it right, and that takes time. :)

    Thanks for your patience, guys, and here is the post!
    ******************************

    Chapter IV




    Walking through the gardens, Obi-Wan headed for the cove, where he often watched Bant swim. No one was about, and he was glad of that. He sat at the edge of the water, looking down at his reflection. He began to go over the past hour.

    What happened back there? I had him for just a second, then...nothing. If only it could have worked, if only--

    He wrapped his arms around himself, tightly, trying to brand that brief moment in time into his body, as it was in his mind. He had been alive so then. Breathing, emotion, life, had saturated every cell in his body, filling him with a kaleidoscope of intense color. He rocked back and forth on his perch, tears gathering in his eyes, as he relived that moment in a continuous loop. He didn't want it to stop.

    I'll be lonely again if I do.

    His fingers tightened desperately on his tunics as he fought to subdue the sobs rising in his throat. Lonely. He had been that way since coming back from Melida/Daan.

    He had thought that Qui-Gon taking him back would solve everything. Instead, it had made things much, much worse. Before, there had been at least a little contact. Now, it was practically nonexistent.

    He loosened his hands, dipping them into the water of the cove. He stared at his reflection, letting his fingers be caressed by the cool liquid.

    What's wrong with me? ? he asked his reflection. Why can't I connect with him again? We were getting close before, and he wanted me back in his life, otherwise he wouldn't have reinstated me as his padawan. Did I transgress so badly, and this is the way the Force is punishing me?

    He shook his head. No, that wasn't right. The Force wouldn't punish him. Never. Testing him, yes. Punishing, no.

    I thought it would all be fine after we were together. We would be happy. Instead, it's just like my probation.

    He winced, recalling that time. He had come to the cove often, heartsick and in despair, agonizing over his situation. He had learned much then; about pain, grief, and false hopes. And devotion.

    He had wondered, in those weeks, about his devotion to his master. He had learned very quickly that it was, and always would be, steadfast. Qui-Gon's quiet courtesy during that time had pained him deeply, but still, he had wanted to be with him. He loved him, after all. Both as a padawan loves his master, and as a son loves his father. He had been overjoyed when Qui-Gon had taken him back...

    "I'm sorry for the way I've been treating you, Obi-Wan. Trying to sort out my feelings about all this has been very difficult, and I took that out on you. I'm sorry." Qui-Gon had told him, sorrow in his blue eyes.

    "No, I understand, master. There's nothing to apologize for." He had replied fervently, faint hope stirring in his heart.

    "There is. I think, though, that maybe the best way to make it up to you is to ask you something. Would you like to be my padawan again, Obi-Wan?"

    "Master!" The joy he'd felt at that moment had been worth all the pain and disillusionment of the past weeks. "Are you sure?" He had asked, frightened. What if it was all a dream?

    "Yes. I don't want you to think it'll be easy; it won't be. Melida/Daan was a hard time, for both of us, and we can't go back to what we had before. We've both changed, as the Council told us when we returned." Qui-Gon's voice was quiet, and sad.

    Obi-Wan had nodded. "I understand. I want to be your padawan again, master. If you'll have me, I want that very much." He had bitten his lip, hoping...

    "I'll have you," Qui-Gon had said quietly. "I've forgiven you for what you did at Melida/Daan, Obi-Wan, I want you to know that.
  18. Lieutenant_Page Jedi Master

    Member Since:
    Mar 17, 2001
    star 4
    Oooo Excellent post! I can really feel Obi-Wan's pain :(

    Nice cliffhanger....mean too ;) :p
  19. Arwen-Jade_Kenobi Jedi Grand Master

    Member Since:
    Feb 9, 2002
    star 5
    nice angsty post JS!! And not as bad a cliffie.

    But I still want more!!
  20. Cascadia Jedi Master

    Member Since:
    Apr 15, 2002
    star 4
    Am I confused or am I reading In Love With Night? :confused:

    Master Shi-Ara? Are you planning on tying these two stories together in some way?

    Love the angsty post, Suzuran! :)
  21. kikeriki Jedi Knight

    Member Since:
    Oct 23, 2002
    star 1
    The plotless epic strikes again! I can't believe I lost this and missed all these wonderful posts! The emotion emanating from this piece of wonder is tangible - amazingly done!

    *sighs* All you talented writers on these boards are enough to make a girl jealous! :D Keep it up!
  22. Sheila Force Ghost

    Member Since:
    Oct 6, 2002
    star 4
    Poor Obi-Wan! :(

    Great post JS! :)

    I can't wait to see what your new character is going to say to Obi-Wan. :D
  23. Jedi_Knight_Hunter Jedi Master

    Member Since:
    Jun 6, 2002
    star 4
    poor poor Obi-Wan ( i think I should put that in my siggie for as much as I say it :) )

    I still think that the buckethead has started to show his inner-moron.
  24. Drunk_on_Tang Jedi Knight

    Member Since:
    Jul 21, 2002
    star 3
    I have a one word description for this post.... [/b]Fuzzy![/b]

    I love the way you write Obi's wanting to be connected with Lunkhead again! Its so real, even though I don't know why Obi would want to be with that jerk.

    Incredible, and incredibly fuzzy! I like it!

    ~Dot
  25. Jedi_Suzuran Jedi Grand Master

    Member Since:
    May 22, 2002
    star 5
    Lieutenant_Page:
    Oooo Excellent post! I can really feel Obi-Wan's pain

    Nice cliffhanger....mean too


    Thank you. :) A cliffie? :eek: Thanks for the compliment, I didn't mean it that way. Really. ;)

    Arwen:
    nice angsty post JS!! And not as bad a cliffie.

    But I still want more!!


    Thanks, Arwen! You'll get more in a few days. :)

    Cas:
    Am I confused or am I reading In Love With Night?

    Master Shi-Ara? Are you planning on tying these two stories together in some way?

    Love the angsty post, Suzuran!


    Ah, confusion, a good thing. [face_devil]

    Seriously, I created Shi-Ara for this fic, but when the Xani bunny struck, I decided to include her there. The reasons why will be apparent in ILWN before they are here. The tie between the two stories is her, but it doesn't mean that it's the only one. :)

    Thanks for liking the post. :D

    kikeriki
    The plotless epic strikes again! I can't believe I lost this and missed all these wonderful posts! The emotion emanating from this piece of wonder is tangible - amazingly done!

    *sighs* All you talented writers on these boards are enough to make a girl jealous! Keep it up!


    [face_blush] You're too kind. Plotless epic is right. :p Thanks for catching this again! [face_love]

    Sheila:
    Poor Obi-Wan!

    Great post JS!

    I can't wait to see what your new character is going to say to Obi-Wan.


    Thanks. You'll find out in a few days.

    JKH:
    poor poor Obi-Wan ( i think I should put that in my siggie for as much as I say it )

    I still think that the buckethead has started to show his inner-moron.


    All these names for Qui. Tsk, tsk, I'm beginning to think he's not liked around here. :p :p


    DOT;
    I have a one word description for this post.... [/b]Fuzzy![/b]

    I love the way you write Obi's wanting to be connected with Lunkhead again! Its so real, even though I don't know why Obi would want to be with that jerk.

    Incredible, and incredibly fuzzy! I like it!


    Fuzzy? Hmm, that's a first description for me. :) I likey though. Thanks!


    I'm working on a post, and it should be up mid week, at the latest.
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