Before For the Greater Good - One Post. Qui-Gon Fic.

Discussion in 'Fan Fiction- Before, Saga, and Beyond' started by Layren, Mar 1, 2004.

Thread Status:
Not open for further replies.
Moderators: Briannakin, mavjade
  1. Layren Force Ghost

    Member Since:
    Oct 28, 2003
    star 5
    I put this on fanfiction.net awhile ago and I decided
    to introduce it here. It was the first real fanfic I ever wrote so I hope you enjoy it! All feedback is welcome.


    Author: Layren
    Title: For the Greater Good
    Category: Drama
    Rating: G
    Summary: When a young Queen-to-be of a planet is about to wed, she needs some advice from a certain Jedi Master?



    It?s the day before my wedding. Instead of feeling happy, free and excited like most brides I feel instead confused, nervous and anxious. I wonder if this really is the right path for me. Do all brides go through this same confusion or is it only me, I wonder. I walk quietly to the window of my quarters and stand silently watching the waterfalls in the distance.

    How I wish I had someone to talk to about my problems and fears. I fear I won?t be able to rule my planet the way my parents did. I?m a grown woman now, not a small child constantly clinging to my mother?s skirts the way I did during those rare times when she had time for me. Being royal has its advantages at times, but I wonder what my life would have been like had I been born without a royal title. I?m the only daughter of a monarchy. Monarchy. It?s an interesting word. Some people believe that monarchs are cruel and have total control over the people they rule. Not us. My parents have been thinking of joining the Galactic Republic and have requested that the Jedi come and oversee the proceedings of my wedding. Strangely, I welcome this idea even though I?m not sure why.

    I sigh and throw open the windows, breathing in deeply the scents of the fresh air, grass and water. I love my planet. It is rich and full of life. The very air tingles with the feeling of something I?m not sure how to describe.

    "It is beautiful isn?t it?"

    I jump slightly, startled at the rich baritone voice behind me. I half-smiled and turned to face the speaker. "It is. The very air flows with ?something I can?t put into words."

    He smiles and closes his eyes breathing in deeply. "The Force, young princess. That is what you are feeling. The Force is life."

    I turn back to the window and play with my waist-length blonde hair nervously. The Jedi looked so calm and peaceful and serene. How can he be so calm at a moment like this? When by this time tomorrow my life would be officially turned upside down and I would be a married woman and inherit my planet? "Master Jinn?"

    He turns to look at me, one eyebrow raised in a quiet query.

    Nervously I look at him for a few seconds and then I sigh deeply, once more feeling the burden of my people?s expectations for me on my shoulders. "What is the right thing to do?"

    He cocks his head curiously and frowned, becoming thoughtful. "The right thing, Princess?"

    I sigh and look down at the floor, feeling rather like a schoolgirl caught in some form of mischief. "Sometimes I wonder if this marriage is really the right thing for me to do. I mean part of me wants to be married because it?s what?s best for the people and the greater good, but the rest of me resents the idea of being chained legally to someone."

    He tucks his arms inside his sleeves and as the fabric of his robe moved I caught sight of the metal cylinder at his hip. "Marriage will be what you make it young Princess," he says finally. "Love, however, is one of the greatest joys one being can ever give another, especially in a marriage."

    His response surprises me enough to look up away from studying the tiles at my feet. I glare at him and whirl around to face the window. Who was he to be lecturing me about love? "How would you know about love?" I snarl, surprising even myself with my outburst. "Jedi are forbidden to love."

    For a moment only, he stares at me and the normally calm Jedi façade disappeares for several long minutes and as he closed his eyes I have a sudden flash of insight. This man, this Qui-Gon Jinn, had lost someone and my cold, callous remarks had hurt him like a vibroblade to the stomach. I sigh deeply feeling my anger melt away as suddenly as it had appeared when I saw this Jed
  2. Qui-Gina-Jinn Force Ghost

    Member Since:
    Jun 2, 2003
    star 4
    :eek: Gooooooooooood! :D

    I really liked the part of the princess hurting Qui-Gon - wondering what had hurt him so deeply?

    Mesa liken dis! :D
  3. Qui-Gina-Jinn Force Ghost

    Member Since:
    Jun 2, 2003
    star 4
  4. Laura_Anu Jedi Master

    Member Since:
    Jun 27, 2002
    star 4
    That was so cute! I can't believe that hardly anyone has read this...I rather liked it! Qui-Gon was so nice to the Princess, and I felt sorry for her.
  5. Shaindl Force Ghost

    Member Since:
    Jun 18, 2002
    star 4
    Very nice. I liked how you alluded to Tahl (or at least that's whom I'm assuming you meant). Great job, Layren!

    Shaindl
  6. Layren Force Ghost

    Member Since:
    Oct 28, 2003
    star 5
    Qui_Gina_jinn Hey there !!! Thanks so much for your lovely review and the up :D

    Laura_Anu I'm glad you liked it!! thanks for your comments!! I had tried to write a different side of Qui-Gon than the normal cold, distant Jedi he's often portrayed as.. I don't see him being that way at all ;) On the contrary being a Jedi connected to the Living Force he FEELS... ;)

    Shaindl Glad you enjoyed it!! I actually didn't have anyone specific in mind for him to allude-- Qui-Gon is a very loving, caring person...once you get past the front he puts up for everyone else. In the Jedi line of duty you lose that you care about ;) which is perhaps why the Jedi rule of attachment exsists .. but I just thought that was a great little flash of insight for the Princess ;)
  7. Kynstar Jedi Grand Master

    Member Since:
    Mar 2, 2004
    star 5
    I remember reading this a while back... it was soooo sweet!!! I loved it! Especially on Qui's memory on his 'pass' love.

    Great Layren glad to see this little one here! :D
  8. VaderLVR64 Manager Emeritus

    Member Since:
    Feb 5, 2004
    star 8
    Very beautifully written! You made everyone come to life quite nicely. Great job!
  9. Jedikma Force Ghost

    Member Since:
    Feb 5, 2004
    star 4
    I love how you describe Qui-Gon in this story. He seems so warm. :)

  10. Jemmiah Jedi Grand Master

    Member Since:
    Mar 5, 2000
    star 5
    I totally agree with the post above. It's so nice to see a fic that portrays Qui-Gon in such a positive light! :) Well done!
  11. CodyMonKenobi Force Ghost

    Member Since:
    Jan 29, 2001
    star 4
    This is very good, I too like the way you make Qui Gon out to be. keep up the good work I will be watching.
  12. Layren Force Ghost

    Member Since:
    Oct 28, 2003
    star 5
    Kynstar Thanks so much hon for the review! Glad you enjoyed it! Congrats on your noms!!!


    VaderLVR64 Thanks!! That's high praise ;) I try to make characters come to life--that's what we all do as authors but sometimes it doesn't quite work the way we want it to. -- Congrats on your noms too!


    Jedikma Qui-Gon is a very warm person ;) How could he not be being connected to living things like he is?

    Jemmiah Thanks!! Qui's my favorite character so it's easier for me to portray him positively unlike some other characters that I have trouble with.. .

    CodyMonKenobi Glad you liked it!! Thanks very much for your kind words :)
  13. JediBrain Jedi Master

    Member Since:
    Apr 26, 2004
    star 1
    I like it. Its interesting to see a Star Wars story written in the first person.

    Will there be more to the story?

    Brian
Moderators: Briannakin, mavjade
Thread Status:
Not open for further replies.