Funny Quotes From Game Characters

ROTS game, Serra to Vader :
"Which one of those buttons calls for help?"

 

In SW Galactic Battlegrounds Mace Windu says 'Banthas are filthy animals and i dont eat filthy animals' its just so random!!!!! ANd if u click on Obi-Wan he says 'U havnet learned anything' in a very scottish accent and its hilarious

 

Yea, that mace line is a pulp fiction line!

 

HK says the best lines in all of Star Wars here is an example:

"Cautionary, master if I say this it will interupt the flow of the story making these meatbags very hostile. A battle will be unavoidable, but I look forward to terminating these organic meatbags. Do you want me to continue?" Hk-47

"Do as I say droid or I will have you scrapped" Revan

"As you wish master."(Starts speaking in the Sand People language) Hk-47

Sand People start howling and growling

"As is I predicted they are upset that you interupted their story and a battle is now certain." Hk-47

Sand People start to attack

"Here we go master. Die Meatbags Die!" Hk-47

He says this after you give the Krayt Dragon Pearl to the storymaster and as the storymaster is telling the story of the sand people you cannot make any remarks that interupt the flow of the story or something like that.

 

Bastila: How old are you?
Revan: 4263. Clean living, you know.

Bastila: What was your position in the Republic?
Revan: I'm a Hutt in human form, trying to take over the galaxy.

HK:
Mockery: Oh master, I love you but I hate everything you stand for! Let us press our fleshy mucus-covered lips together in the cargo hold!

When does he say that?

You have to get enough influence to make him talk about his past master and companions. It refers to Bastila and Revan, so you have to set Revan to male.

 

In KOTOR2 when the Exlie is going to meet with the exchange boss.
Atton: "Well good thing it's not a trap."
Disciple: "No Atton I think it is a trap."
Atton just looks at him like he is an idiot.

Kriea at the begining of the game: "Perhaps we can talk in private away from babbaling fools and imbecils." I cant remember it word for word.

 

Guybrush: Was your mother's father bald, too?
Murray(in Curse of Monkey Island): I'm not bald...I just have a really high widow's peak

 

on Dxun the Mandalorian on the cliff you go over to the detinator.

Mandalorian: DONT TOUCH THAT IT WILL BLOW UP ALL MY CHARGES!

Exile: what this button? (press button)

 

Hk-47
"Conclusion, such pair amount of driven human responses never cease to decrease the charge in my capacitors, and make me wish I could press a blaster pistol to my behavior core and pull the trigger."

 

in KOTOR II when Atton says that Kreia might have been good looking once

you can say..

Good looking? I must of taken a shot from a blaster to the head when i wasnt looking


and that whole half-naked Jedi interrogation thing from KOTOR II also

 

Cabana Boy: Let me see your membership card and I'll let you through!
Guybrush Threepwood: You don't need to see my identification.
Cabana Boy: I don't need to see your identification.
Guybrush Threepwood: I'm not the pirate you're looking for.
Cabana Boy: You're not the pirate I'm looking for.
Guybrush Threepwood: I can go about my business.
Cabana Boy: You can go about your business.
Guybrush Threepwood: Move along.
Cabana Boy: Move along, move along... hey! Your mind tricks won't work on me, boy!

 

In RC when scorch is looking to a corpse from a trandoshian that he killed.

Scorch: "Sev, this one looks like your mother"

 

Ravel: There is no room for '2' in the world of 1's and 0's, no place for 'mayhap' in a house of trues and falses, and no 'green with envy' in a black and white world.

Morte: Women were the reason I became a monk - and, ah, the reason I switched back...

Nordom: Attention; Morte. I have a question. Do you have a destiny? A purpose?
Morte: Is Annah still wearing clothes?
Nordom: Affirmatory.
Morte: Then the answer is yes.

Morte: Hey Nordom, calculate the easiest way for me to snuggle with Annah's pillows.
Nordom: Annah, Morte wishes to snuggle with your pillows!

Nameless One: Can you speak?
Ecco: [She shakes her head at you and smiles sadly]
Morte: I love this chit already!

 

I haven't played Planescape in years....perhaps I should get it out again. Those quotations are great.

 

In my opinion, no thread of this nature is quite complete without mention of the following games:

• Starcraft
• Warcraft series
• C&C: Red Alert 2 (especially with the Yuri's Revenge expansion)
• C&C: Generals (including Zero Hour)

Here're some examples

• "Enter the think tank." -Mastermind, RA2: Yuri's Revenge
• "Up, up, up!" -Scud launcher, C&C: Generals
• "MORTAR KOMBAT! -mortar team, Warcraft III

Dawn of War, as grim as that game is, is not without comic gems, mostly from the Imperial Guard...

• "We're the Imperial Guard; it's time we started acting like it."
• "We'll get through this; I know we can."

 

"WILL SOMEBODY SHUT THAT TRASH COMPACTOR UP"-Kotor 2 Atton Rand talking crap about T3-M4

 

From WarCraft III - The Frozen Throne:

Blood Mage: My blood cries out for the vengeance of my people's blood, which can only be repaid with twice as much blood! Or maybe three times as much blood! Like, if you went to hell and it was full of blood, and that blood was on fire, and it was raining blood, then maybe THAT would be enough blood. But, uh... probably not.

Draenai: Who's that guy with the sickle? Why is he beckoning? Why is my grandfather with him?

Prince Kael'Thas: This is preposterous! Am I to assault the undead with nothing but sticks and harsh language?

Spell Breaker: I never stole ANY buffs! I got receipts for all of em!

Night Elf Runner: When you care enough to send the very best... Send someone else.

Varimathras: We're not a cult so much as a maniacal group of fanatical, blade-wielding zea lots.

 

I can't look for landmines, I'm drunk!!
-Terrorist, Splinter Cell: Pandora Tomorrow

Marine 1: Is it Safe???
(explosion)
Marine 2: You tell me!
-Halo 2 demo

 

Lol! My favorite games are ones with the memorable quotes that kept me laughing for several minutes. Good times.

 

Most of the script of Grim Fandango. Some of my favorites include:

Manuel Calavera: My boss is always giving me these motivational books - "They Bought the Farm, Now Sell Them the Cows"... stuff like that.

Manuel Calavera: She must have been beautiful with skin.
Celso: [wistfully] Weren't we all?

Manuel Calavera: Run, you pigeons. It's Robert Frost.

Manuel Calavera: There's a note next to this toaster: "To avoid further mishaps, PLEASE butter your English muffins AFTER you toast them. - Facilities."

Manuel Calavera: I bet Hector pauses here every day, and thinks to himself, "Boy, I wish I could see past my gut and enjoy my expensive monogrammed floor."

You can find a much more expansive list here.
http://imdb.com/title/tt0177822/quotes

Enjoy
Trap

 

Glottis - "You don't happen to have a breath mint, I suppose?"

 

All those poems that Manny says at the club


Which are promptly ripped off to rapturous applause by the owner

 

The scene in Final Fantasy VII when the party's threatening to do various extremely painful things to Don Corneo. And the scenes with Cloud as a girl that precede that, and the bit with Barret in the sailor suit...ah, hell, almost the entire first half of the game is comedy gold. The Choco/Mog summon is also pretty funny. Fun thing to do -- whittle down the health of a big, bad boss and then kill him with what basically amounts to a giant chicken. Very heroic, Cloud.

The KOTOR games and Republic Commando are also pretty hysterical, especially some of Revan's optional lines. Jolee and HK take the cake, and even Kreia gets off a funny line sometimes, like on Nar Shaddaa when the option's given to ask Kreia to dance in a thong for whatever that Hutt's name was.

 

Witch Doctor:
"Fukui-san,"
"Yes, go ahead."
"What the Iron Troll is doing right now is putting heads in the pot, they have to boil for 20 minutes so the eyes can be used in a second dish, and eye and raspberry sorbet."
"Mmmm, sounds good!"

Dreadlord:
"Yes? Oh, for the last time. I'm a DREADlord, not a DRUGlord."

Dryad:
"I'll attract the enemy with my Human Call: 'I'm so wasted! I'm so wasted!!!'"

Demon Hunter:
"Darkness called... but I was on the phone, so I missed him. I tried to *69 Darkness, but his machine picked up. I yelled, 'Pick up the phone, Darkness!' but he ignored me. Darkness must have been screening his calls."

Priest:
"Side effects may include dry mouth, nausea, vomiting, water-retention, painful rectalage, hallucination, dementia, psychosis, death and halitosis. Magic is not for everyone. Consult your doctor before use."

 

I forget what the name is, but there's this game where you have to go around picking up lost body parts that were stolen from you. Anyway, this was really funny:

Girl: Look, mister, there's your eye!

Guy: It's okay, pick it up...