Green Eyed Monster (JA short fic)

Discussion in 'Fan Fiction Stories--Classic JC Board (Reply-Only)' started by Jedi Susie, Aug 21, 2001.

Thread Status:
Not open for further replies.
  1. Jedi Susie Force Ghost

    Member Since:
    Mar 12, 2000
    star 4
    I wanted to post this before the next JA book incase something happens to Tahl. Enjoy!

    ~*~

    Disclaimer: Not mine, never will be, no money made, and no permission granted.

    Rating: G

    Timeframe: Takes place right around the time of Deceptions- Obi is 13.

    Spoilers: JA books

    Archive: Wolfie, Gimpy, and Telly. Anyone else I've also given previous premission to that I forgot :) If anyone else wants this (or, heck, any of my stories) just let me know.

    Author's notes: This little story is all thanks to Kelly, who, unbeknownst to her until now, got this little plot bunny to start biting. Although, I would have liked it if she had written this, for some reason, unknown to me and I'm sure a great many people, she doesn't feel she could write fanfiction. I have to disagree, but like trying to get a bantha to brake-dance, trying to get Kelly to write is proving more difficult than I thought. However, I am no daunted so?Kelly, you really should write fanfiction. There, I've said my peace.

    So, this is dedicated to Kelly, whose wonderful friendship and kind words have always made me want to write more stories. Thank so much! So, without further ado?

    ~

    GREEN EYED MONSTER
    By: Susie (Ari82@aol.com)

    ~

    I try not to let it bother me, but some how I can't help it. It bothers me *so* deeply. So much, that every time I see them together my stomach drops because I know that I am forgotten. When he sees her, she becomes his whole world. Whatever he can do to help her, he will. Whatever she wants, he'll get her. Even when she doesn't want him near her, he'll stay by her. My Master and Tahl have a bond that I am envious of.

    I know what I feel is wrong- I know that jealously is unbecoming of a Jedi Padawan, but I just can't help it. I am envious of Tahl- there's no other way to say it. I want what she has with my Master. I want to be the one that Qui-Gon will bug until I relent and tell him everything. I want to be the one that he will go great lengths to help, but I'm not.

    I'm only his Padawan.

    The boy that he never wanted and tried so hard never to get.

    I'm to blame solely for the lack of a bond that my Master and I share. After Melida/Daan, everything we had started to have was shattered and I know he turned to Tahl for guidance. She became the person in his life that didn't betrayed him- she became his life when I left. Once I came back he couldn't let go of her and hasn't.

    She's the person that Qui-Gon can trust. He knows he can't trust me, no matter how badly I let him know he can. He already knows that I am quick to betray and who would want to hold someone like that close to his or her heart?

    Of course, my Master cares for me- I know this, but I'm second in his heart. I know, even if he doesn't, that he loves Tahl. Whether as a lover, or a close friend I can't deceiver, but he loves her. He only cares for me.

    Many times I've seen how deeply he cares for her. Every time he watches her sightless eyes focus on a task before her that she cannot see, but still attempts- his heart swells with pride. Every time he sees her misstep on account of not being able to see- his heart breaks. Every time that she pushes him away- his heart pursues her. His heart is hers and it's breaking mine.

    Every time I see him looking at her with pride for some small task she completes, I feel my breath stop in my throat. Why can't I be the one that he has that gaze for? Why can't I be the one that gets his praise, his devotion, and his love?

    Tahl may be flawed, her sightless eyes will forever remain unseeing, but I am flawed, too, and mine is not physical. I am an unworthy Padawan of Qui-Gon Jinn, he deserves so much better than I can ever do.

    He deserves Tahl.

    One day, I'm certain he and Tahl will complete each other and Obi-Wan Kenobi will slowly fad into the night. I'm ready to accept that because he loves her and I love him. Anything that will make him happy, I will give him. He is my world and only should be given the best that can be offered
  2. greencat336 Jedi Grand Master

    Member Since:
    Jan 27, 2001
    star 5
    That was very sad, poor Obi. Our little self doubting padawan would react that way. I liked that even though he was jealous, he still wanted his master to have whatever made him happiest.

    A sequel is definetely needed, one with lots of mush as Qui-Gon assures Obi that he is also very much loved and valued. Please don't keep us waiting too long!
  3. Jemmiah Jedi Grand Master

    Member Since:
    Mar 5, 2000
    star 5
    Wow, Susie! You captured Obi-Wan's sense of melancholy and his own intense sadness at his 'lack' of a bond compared to the one that Tahl shared with Qui-Gon superbly well! I would loved to read a sequel, if you ever write one! :) :)
  4. Cow_Girl Chapter Rep Niagara ON, CA

    Chapter Rep
    Member Since:
    Jun 15, 2001
    star 5
    Awww thst was sad...
    I did notice in the special edition book how Qui-gon did choose to look out for Tahl instead of helping Ob-wan at his own Murder Trial! So course he would feel that way, I think that a little sequel for this would be great.
  5. Albion Jedi Knight

    Member Since:
    Sep 18, 2000
    star 3
    I liked that a lot, and I hope you write some from young Obi's POV. Getting inside a character's head and sorting it out so well is quite a talent. :D
  6. Padme_the_Angel Jedi Knight

    Member Since:
    Jul 18, 2001
    star 1
    That was, so sad, but really good. Why don't you write a sequel about Obi-Wan and Anakin?
  7. Jedi Susie Force Ghost

    Member Since:
    Mar 12, 2000
    star 4
    Thank you everyone!!! I'm glad everyone thought I did a good job of handling Obi-Wan's thoughts. I normally don't stray in 1st person just cause I don't do as well.

    Glad to see I did okay.

    As for a sequel, I'm thinking about waiting until the next JA book- then I can see what happens and go off of that.

    Thank you all again. You've made my day ;)

    Hmm, Obi and Anakin...could work... :)
  8. Obi the Kid Jedi Master

    Member Since:
    Apr 13, 2000
    star 4
    I already replied to this on a list..but WOW! Just had to reply here! This is wonderful Susie! Just amazing!

    Obi
  9. ewen Jedi Master

    Member Since:
    Jun 11, 2001
    star 4
    I don't blame obi.I hope you have a sequel,so maybe master will straighten him out.As far as Tahl goes,I hope she is killed off in JA 15 so Ms.Watson can include Obi in the apprentice series.PEACE Ewen
  10. Healer_Leona Manager Emeritus

    Member Since:
    Jul 7, 2000
    star 9
    Susie, that was exquisite!!! The emotions conveyed were painfully real and beautifully written. I too hope you write a sequel and would feel honored to read it! :) :)
  11. Abbi_Cee Jedi Master

    Member Since:
    Jul 3, 2000
    star 4
    What a lovely story, I felt so bad for poor Obi. I'm sure he's mistaken about how Qui-Gon feels for him, but teens feel things so deeply. (I should know, I've got one) ;) Yes, a sequel would be nice.
  12. Jane Jinn Jedi Grand Master

    Member Since:
    Jan 12, 2000
    star 5
    Lovely, Susie. Just lovely.
  13. Jedi Susie Force Ghost

    Member Since:
    Mar 12, 2000
    star 4
    Oh, guys, thanks so much :) Now I really have to start thinking about that sequel cause you all have been so wonderful.

    Thank you again...now you've made my night ;)
  14. Ginger_Jedi Jedi Grand Master

    Member Since:
    Jun 4, 2001
    star 6
    I imagine that's exactly how Obi would feel in such a situation. Poor lil guy!

    Wonderful stuff Susie and a sequel would be great! :)
  15. Kaylla_Norn_II Jedi Knight

    Member Since:
    Jun 4, 2001
    star 2
    um just adding my voice to the clamor already here.... and upping this so more can find it.
  16. greencat336 Jedi Grand Master

    Member Since:
    Jan 27, 2001
    star 5
    Just stopping in to see if you had written anymore Jedi Susie. . .

    Hey ewen, some of us read JA for Qui, not Obi. Not that there is anything wrong with the boy, but I just find the man much more interesting. And, there will be lots of Obi in Ep II & III, but JA is all we get of Qui! Besides fanfics, of course. I'll be very sorry if Tahl is killed off (although I'm willing to bet that she will be :( )
  17. Healer Apprentice Lina Force Ghost

    Member Since:
    Jun 1, 2000
    star 4
    Oh, that was wonderful Susie! So touching and heartwrenching. Beautifully written.
  18. Jedi Susie Force Ghost

    Member Since:
    Mar 12, 2000
    star 4
    Well, y'all might be getting your wish fairly soon. I've slowly begun to think of plots for a sequel. However, it has yet to be written or even put into complete thoughts.

    Just wanted to let you all know that something is stiring in my head :)

    Thanks to everyone who has been so wonderful with FB. I never thought this would be so well recieved. I'm happy that it was...very much so.
Thread Status:
Not open for further replies.