Grudge Match, 8 Jul 2005, Chewie VS. Worf

OK, so despite the Kirk-Factor, the Death Star still *spanked* the Enterprise.

After Kevin's wonderful suggestion (I know it's Worf and not Spock), I pulled this grudgematch next. I was going to save it, and do a non-Star Wars one this week, but we'll save that for next week.

*Remember to read the entire scenario before you vote*

The Setting

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Captain's log, Stardate 2324.7. After travelling through an Unknown Energy Field (tm), we have found ourselves in a strange new locale. According to our computers, we have been transported over 1 billion light-years across the universe. The ship chronometers also indicate that we have travelled back in time approximately 10 million years. The general consensus among the crew is that the Enterprise is in a place a long, long time ago, in a galaxy far, far away.
Captain's log, Stardate 2325.2. We have encountered a great deal of trouble after beaming down to a desert Class M world, known to the inhabitants as "Tatooine." We were graciously invited to the home of a jovial fellow named Jabba. Upon our arrival, we were ambushed by Jabba's agents and imprisoned in his dungeons. I fear he plans to use us for entertainment this evening. He has selected the strongest of us, Worf, to fight in unarmed combat against a fearful opponent. We have not yet seen the opponent, but know only his name, "Chewbacca", and his situation. It seems if Chewbacca wins, the life of his friend "Han Solo" is spared. Worf must win if we are to regain our freedom. Chewbacca must win if he is to save the life of his friend. We can only wait for the outcome.




Chewbacca
vs.
Worf

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The Commentary

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BRIAN: Well, I'm going with Chewie on this one, Steve. Truly the Wookies and the Klingons are two of the strongest humanoid creatures known to this universe (along with Vulcans, of course), but I think the Wookie has the upper hand here. I hate to beat a horse to death, but it comes down to motiviation again. Chewbacca is always fired with emotion, even when nothing significant is happening. Now he's in a battle to save both his life AND the life of the one person he truly cares about: Han Solo. Everyone knows that an emotional wookie is a dangerous wookie. Plus, we have seen several examples about how Chewie HATES to lose.
What is Worf led by? While he occasionally shows anger, rage, etc., Worf is primarily led by an emotionless sense of duty. He will be fighting mainly to save his fellow crewmembers. Why this is noble, yes, his desire will fall well short of what is required to defeat the wookster. As the two competitors circle each other, sizing each other up, Worf is calculating the best possible approach. While he is busy evaluating the best strategy, Chewbacca steps up and literally knocks his head off.

(BTW, If this were Worf and the crew from TOS, Worf would undoubtedly win since Kirk would say f*** the Prime Directive (tm) and get everybody out of there. Picard's too much of a pansy to get involved.)

STEVE: That last point is definitely true. However, your earlier arguments show that you lack some basic insight into this duel. Let's start off with training. Worf practices his fighting daily in the Holodeck. Every day his skills are honed to that of an awesome fighting machine. What does Chewy do? He hangs out in strange alien bars with his buddy Han. When he's not doing that, he's sitting in a cockpit flying the Millenium Falcon. That's just not a healthy lifestyle! Although he is a big Wookie, under all that fur there is just a bunch of flab. Hans and Franz could do a whole show about him.

Another issue here is that Chewy just can't seem to do anything on his own. He always needs help from Han, Leia, or Luke. When was the last time he showed some initiative? He'll probably just mope around until the fight, and then Worf will come

Chewbacca has the rage factor, plus his Life-debt to Han. He's also bigger, and has more reach (longer arms).

Rage
+ Life Debt
+ Bigger
+ Longer Arms
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= Chewbacca ripping Worf's arms out of his sockets in 30 seconds or less.

Game over!

I have to go with Chewie on this one.

I can see it now. Chewie holding Worf back at arms length with Chewie having one of his big hands on Worf's head while Worf swings and swings at Chewie's belly. Worf gets tired, sits down and pouts. This is when Chewie stomps him into the dirt, and then scraps his foot off on the edge of a step or something

Kevin

Well, I must say this is a much more fair fight than one ship vs. a huge space station. Unarmed? It would be a pretty good match, maybe Chewy would win. But give them a weapon (a blade of some sort, NO blasters or phasers!) and it's Wookie Stew for dinner.

Again, no contest. It took a moon to kill Chewbacca, and Worf aint no moon.

Chewie, no doubt.

I'm wondering who voted for Worf, and why???