Before - Legends Guilty, a vignette with Qui-Gon and master Dooku

Discussion in 'Fan Fiction- Before, Saga, and Beyond' started by earlybird-obi-wan, Sep 20, 2009.

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  1. earlybird-obi-wan Jedi Grand Master

    Member Since:
    Aug 21, 2006
    star 6
    Title: Guilty
    Author: Earlybird-obi-wan
    Timeframe: 76 years before ANH
    Characters: Dooku, Jinn, OC?s
    Genre: HC adventure vignette
    Summary: Qui-Gon helps a boy and feels guilty when the boy disappears.
    Disclaimer: Star Wars is owned by G.L.
    Note: links to [link=]DNA I.D. a CorSec mystery[/link]


    ?Where is that delegate master??

    ?Patience padawan,? the Jedi master answered.

    The 16 year old teenager was sitting on one of the benches in the great arena and watching the Phoebos Memorial Run. ?Observe and you will learn my padawan,? Qui-Gon Jinn remembered the words spoken by his master only half an hour ago. But he hadn?t spotted the delegate yet and he had seen quite a lot of men that could fit the description given to his master and him during the briefing for the mission.

    Master Yoda had told them that that they had to settle a trade dispute between the Garinola and Kaldaba clans of Ghoranan a planetary system quite near Malastare. Both the clans are fond of podracing and have their teams sent to the great event. Garido has one of pods in the race and you will meet him there.

    A smile passed his features when he saw and heard the noise of the pods heading to the finish line. He was sitting next to a little boy with smiling intense blue eyes and raven black hair. The boy had joined him after walking up and down the rows of chairs to get a better view.

    Qui-Gon was responsible for this and he sensed that the boy was very curious about Jedi. A slight Force suggestion to the sleepy man that was only interested in getting his ale and making remarks to the vendor had the man leaving and the boy could take the seat. ?That boy likes to see podraces and I have seen his parents quite near.?

    - - -

    One red and gold striped pod with two big engines was headed to the finish-line when it happened. Debris from another pod was still swirling down and entered through the big intake of the left engine. Flames could be seen spewing out of the engine and smoke almost obscured the pod with its pilot frantically reaching for the controls of the power-line.


    The engine disintegrated and the right engine still working headed to the surface of the arena.

    Qui-Gon admired the skill of the pilot when the pod came free from the runaway engine and came to a stop. A small smile passed his features when he saw the boy hopping on his seat and swaying with his feet that couldn?t touch the ground.
    The right engine exploded and debris fell down on the arena floor.

    Qui-Gon gave a sigh. ?No one is injured.? He observed and listened to his little companion.

    ?Lira did you see that big engine go kaboom?? The boy turned in his chair and looked up to the row where his parents and sister were seating.

    ?I did and I am glad the pilot could crash-land his pod. Look he is alive.?

    Craning his neck the boy couldn?t see that much because a big man with a voluminous belly and sparse hair on a gleaming skull was standing up. He climbed on the seat and perched precariously on it he could see where the last pod making it to the finish in the Phoebos Memorial Run had crashed in a dirt and pebble strewn field still stirring up dust.

    ?Grethil be careful!?

    ?He is and he can take care of himself.?

    Balancing on his seat Grethil turned towards his sister and smiled ?I am glad too that he survived and came in to finish the race. But that dug was fantastic. He won the race.?

    ?We are leaving soon Grethil. Come and join us.?

    But Grethil had again turned towards the arena and the platform where officials were directing the pilots to their places.

    ?He will Elisa, there is only one exit. I can still see him and he is only a few rows away.?

    ?Ladies and gentlemen the jury has come to a conclusion after viewing the entire race. Kello ? yes you have seen him landing safe ? is last. Seluma, Corandos, Jakonos and Jeroos have placed for the next round and a holoshot of the finish revealed our champion of this round Seluma. Applause for Seluma. He has won the first round of the Phoebos
  2. MiralukaJedi Jedi Knight

    Member Since:
    May 15, 2008
    star 4
    Very nice little viggie. Well done!
  3. Gkilkenny Jedi Master

    Member Since:
    Mar 27, 2004
    star 4
    A nice story showing Grethil as a youngster.

    Well done.=D=
  4. AzureAngel2 Jedi Grand Master

    Member Since:
    Jun 14, 2005
    star 6
    I simply do love the way how fates meet one another in your stories. Well done!


    I just can´t help thinking about little pinguines when I read a line like this:

    Flames could be seen spewing out of the engine and smoke almost obscured the pod with its pilot frantically reaching for the controls of the power-line.


  5. Kynstar Jedi Knight

    Member Since:
    Mar 2, 2004
    star 5
    Thanks again for the link! Loved this :) The bit about Qui feeling guilty was touching. The Healer talking about the Eagle was pretty nifty :) reminds me of one of the Indian legends. Well done :D
  6. KELIA Manager Emeritus

    Member Since:
    Jul 26, 2005
    star 6
    ?Master that boy is Force sensitive and I have a bad ...?

    It's too bad Dooku didn't listen to his padawan

    :( :( :(

    Maybe if he had, Grethil would have had a better life.

    Great job on this

    =D= =D= =D= =D=
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