Saga Halloween Challenge - The Odd Jedi Couple - Humour

Title - The Odd Jedi Couple
Author - cdmcc
Genre - Humour
Characters - Obi-Ani
Notes - For the Halloween Challenge, also taken from the Obi thread. I threatened it and it wouldn't let go. Anyways, the worst opening sentence and a 1000 word vig.

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The deep fat fryer was playing up again for the third time in a week and employee 1138 (or Obi to his friend) again got the grisly job of fixing it. As his fingers touched the surface he also received his third electric shock of the week. He felt the blazing eye of his boss burning a hole in the back of his head as he pushed his hand into his mouth.

?Kenobi,? the slug sighed, ?go and serve.?

Obi-Wan straightened up, carefully ensuring that the small paper hat was at the regulated sixty-two degree angle. He had already been docked around a weeks wages for tardiness. Sighing heavily, he moved to the counter and faced the customers with a fake smile.

?Who?s first??

A large woman and a huge child pushed their way to the front.

?Four nerf burgers!? shouted the child in a voice which could have knocked a Bantha off its feet. Kenobi surmised that the child would probably have eaten it once it was down.

?Salad?? enquired Obi-Wan helpfully. The child looked as if he were about to pass into a state of shock. The Mother dutifully fanned what Obi-Wan assumed to be a boy.

?I?ll just have the two,? she said as she fanned wildly.

***

The place had been heaving all day and Obi-Wan was about to get off shift when a few shifty looking students burst into the Gulp?n?Blow. They stood sniggering for a while as the boys pushed each other about. The girls sighed and rolled their eyes as a pile of napkins spilled across the floor.

I aint picking those up, he thought.

They were taking an age to go through the menu. He had foolishly taken up the offer of a free lunch once and had come to the conclusion that he had probably taken three years off his life.

?Erm, can I have??Xermaaue, make it two?.a Muja-Juice and?..a Hoi-Broth.?

Obi-Wan winced. The last time he had went near Hoi-Broth he had scared away several children attending a birthday party. He waved a hand.

?Hoi-Broth is off. You?re not hungry anyway. Go home and study.?

?I?m going home to study,? said the group loudly.

The weak minded indeed, thought Obi-Wan.

****

?Are you certain of your information Anakin?? asked Obi-Wan as he threw off his hat.

?Of course,? replied Anakin as he watched the holo news.

Obi-Wan gazed at the mess surrounding him as he made his way to the kitchen.

?Can?t you clean up? I?m out working all day and the last thing I want is to come back to a hovel.?

Anakin rolled his eyes.

?And don?t roll your eyes Anakin. What?s for dinner??

?I had mine. I didn?t know what time you?d be back.?

Obi-Wan stopped dead in his tracks.

?I finish at the same time every day, the same time as I have done for the last three weeks.?

?Oh.?

?Oh indeed. I take it as read that the cupboard is bare. You were supposed to go shopping.?

?It started raining.?

Pushing the magazines and litter from the only other chair, Obi-Wan sat down.

?Let?s go through this again Anakin. We arrive, you get information pertaining to the Sith, claiming that the Gulp?n?Blow is a front for their activities. I take on work there to find out such information while you??..what is it you actually do Anakin??

?I do stuff,? Anakin replied defensively. ?Hey, you really should see the girls who?ve moved in upstairs. Absolute stunners and they?re students! What I was thinking was, we could invite them down here for a meal?.?

The open mouth of Obi-Wan gave him his answer.

?Well, it?s boring here. You?re out all day and there are only so many soaps a guy can watch. Anyway I asked them to come down tomorrow.?

?You did WHAT??

Anakin picked up the cards.

?Sabacc??

***

Obi-Wan had phoned in sick so that he could tidy up. He had set Anakin to pot stirring duties, which consisted of the younger Jedi yelling, ?Is it s

 

Great response to the challenge

 

cdmcc Wrote: ¡°Four nerf burgers!¡± shouted the child in a voice which could have knocked a Bantha off its feet. Kenobi surmised that the child would probably have eaten it once it was down.



what is it you actually do Anakin?¡±

¡°I do stuff,¡± Anakin replied defensively.



Could this evening possibly get worse? he thought, with some venom.

The girls were clutching small bottles.

¡°We brought Hoi-Broth,¡± smiled Stella.



Very good! Poor Obi-wan, I wonder if he ever got the moons for his badge!

 

Obi-Wan straightened up, carefully ensuring that the small paper hat was at the regulated sixty-two degree angle.

LMAO! Odd couple, indeed!

 

They brought Hoi broth! Was it aged? Poor Obi.

 

Oh my!! This was hilarious!! Way to go cdmcc!!!

Loved this:

Obi-Wan winced. The last time he had went near Hoi-Broth he had scared away several children attending a birthday party. He waved a hand.

?Hoi-Broth is off. You?re not hungry anyway. Go home and study.?

?I?m going home to study,? said the group loudly.

The weak minded indeed, thought Obi-Wan.

Great job! And what does the girls bring??

Thanks for sharing this!

 

Obi-Wan winced. The last time he had went near Hoi-Broth he had scared away several children attending a birthday party. He waved a hand.

?Hoi-Broth is off. You?re not hungry anyway. Go home and study.?

?I?m going home to study,? said the group loudly.

The weak minded indeed, thought Obi-Wan.



I really needed that, thank you!

Wonderful entry to the challenge, Chris. I truly enjoyed it!

 

How can you not like a fic that starts out with 'The deep fat fryer...'? LOL! Very funny!

I think this was my favorite line:

Obi-Wan straightened up, carefully ensuring that the small paper hat was at the regulated sixty-two degree angle.

 

The mother fanning her child when Obi-Wan suggested a salad!

Great job!

 

?Let?s go through this again Anakin. We arrive, you get information pertaining to the Sith, claiming that the Gulp?n?Blow is a front for their activities. I take on work there to find out such information while you??..what is it you actually do Anakin??

This was hilarious! Too cute. I love Obi-Wan getting made that he slaves away at a fast food place while Anakin sits around on his behind.

Great job.

 

I love the name of joint where Obi is working. Oh, and Anakin getting a tummy, too funny.

 

Big thanks to Kelia,Brentus,Jade,Jaira,Leona,Kynstar,VM,Jedi 2B,Pony,AF and Buddy for the kind words.

I just couldn't get the Obi clearing his sinuses bit in, although Walter Mattheu as Anakin is stretching it a bit.