Before Hauntings from the Past: OC, Qui-Gon, Obi-Wan (40 BBY AU) Chapter 14 Posted 3/16

Discussion in 'Fan Fiction- Before, Saga, and Beyond' started by Book-Geek, Oct 28, 2011.

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  1. mavjade It's so FLUFFY Fanfic & New Movies Manager

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    At least she's gotten to move up. Gifted children who aren't allowed to do what they need to learn tend to make a lot of trouble. ;)

    She activated the blade. Smiling as she heard the hum, she gripped the saber in both hands and begun practicing her footwork, striking imaginary foes.
    :eek: [face_worried] That was a little scary as to what could have happened!


    =D=
  2. Book-Geek Jedi Master

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    May 28, 2011
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    Hazel: And the Masters don't regret giving her a chance to prove herself. :)

    Shira_Adola: Welcome to the party! You're on the list!

    AzureAngel2: Jane won't be lonely for much longer, thankfully!:)

    Luna_Nightshade: The library is my favorite part of the Temple. If I was a Jedi, I'd be working for Madam Nu.

    mavjade: Jane has a slight mischief streak in her, but it's more a cross between being smart and being three.
    That was a little scary as to what could have happened!

    I didn't realize that was scary till you pointed that out. And you're right, that could have been bad.

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  3. Book-Geek Jedi Master

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    May 28, 2011
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    I'm breaking my posting schedule because this is such a short chapter. Hope you like it!



    Chapter Four: Welcome Home Surprise


    ?It feels so good to be home,? Seventeen year old Obi-Wan Kenobi said with a sigh.

    ?I agree,? His Master, Qui-Gon Jinn, said as he took in the Coruscant scenery.

    ?After all those weeks on ration bars, I can?t wait to dig into the cafeteria food,? Obi-Wan said.

    ?Our own beds to sleep on,? Qui-Gon said as they started to climb the stairs leading up to the Temple.

    ?Clean clothes and warm showers,? Obi-Wan said wistfully.

    ?No more 2 AM wake-up calls,? Qui-Gon said as they stepped inside the Temple. ?Sleep as long as we want.?

    ?No more-? Suddenly Obi-Wan stopped talking.

    ?What is it, Obi-Wan?? Qui-Gon asked. But then he noticed it. ?Why is everyone staring at us??

    ?Actually, Master, I think they are all staring at you.?

    ?What did I do?? Qui-Gon asked, very confused.

    ?I don?t know,? Obi-Wan said, then grinned. ?Hey, there?s Bant! Maybe she can tell us what?s going on.?

    ?Hi guys!? Ban said, giving both Jedi quick hugs. ?How was your mission??

    ?It was successful,? Obi-Wan answered. ?Bant, why is everyone staring at Master Qui-Gon??

    ?Oh. That.? Bant said, her smile dropping some. ?Well, uh, you need to go see the Council. Come on, I?ll take you!?

    As they headed toward the Council Room, they passed a classroom whose students were just getting out for the day, chatting about the lesson. Obi-Wan and Qui-Gon were very surprised to see among the young teenagers a very small girl about three years old.

    The little girl stopped discussing the Sith War with her classmates and stared at Qui-Gon. They both had looks on their faces that clearly said ?Who are you??

    ?Jane, I think you should come with us,? Bant said calmly, though her eyes were panicking slightly.

    The little girl?Jane?nodded and took Bant?s hand.

    Together, the four went up to the Council Room.

    Bant opened the door and they all filed in, Jane still clutching Bant?s webbed hands.

    Qui-Gon knew it was a bad sign when all the Council Members exchanged glances and shifted awkwardly.

    Then, Mace gestured to the small girl and said,

    ?Qui-Gon, Obi-Wan, this is Jane Mago. She is the daughter of Jedi Knight Jocelyn Mago.?

    Both Master and Padawan gazed down at the little girl, amazed. Could she really be the missing Jedi?s daughter?

    ?Then where is Knight Mago?? Qui-Gon asked.

    ?She died a few months ago. Jane then was escorted to Coruscant for the continuation of her training.? Mace explained.

    With no one watching her, Jane shifted. She hadn?t been exactly honest about how she ended up at the Temple, but she wasn?t about to mention that.

    ?Qui-Gon,? Adi said softly. ?Before she died, Jocelyn named Jane?s guardian, who is to train her and encourage her to follow Corellian traditions.?

    Qui-Gon?s brow furrowed. Why was the Council explaining all this to him? What did he have to do with this girl?

    ?Who is her guardian?? Qui-Gon asked.

    ?Qui-Gon,? Yoda said. ?Jane?s godfather, you are.?
  4. Hazel Force Ghost

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    Nov 9, 2010
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    Definitely a surprise for Qui-Gon!

    Can't wait for the reactions. :)
  5. Nyota's Heart Combos & Paragraphs Host

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    Hi, Book-Geek! I like your OC. =D= She's a precocious little munchkin ;)

    And the fact that Qui-Gon is her guardian just adds a whole new -- yumness factor LOL

    (Shira_Adola has reintroduced me to the =P~ that is Qui-Gon) [face_laugh]

    Jane's past is wonderfully mysterious; i.e., her mother left the order suddenly [face_thinking] and chose Qui-Gon as the guardian -- has someone been up to some shenanigans? [face_laugh]

    Kudos for starting a big! fic-writing project :cool:

    And I'd very much like PMs when you update. @};-

  6. Shira_Adola Jedi Master

    Member Since:
    Feb 15, 2011
    star 4
    *Sniggers* He is a wonderfully attractive man ^^ although, I will admit I would rather take Obi-Wan.

    Very good chapter. I love the banter between the two after their mission :D Although I hate cliffies. You couldn't have shown us Qui's and Obi's reactions before you ended?
  7. Lady_Misty Force Ghost

    Member Since:
    Mar 21, 2007
    star 4
    Jane seems slightly Mary Sueish to me but I can stand it though, because sooner or later I will discover that she isn't a Mary Sue at all and it was just my imagination. :)

    I still can't believe that I missed an update. But then I am rarely on this board so it is understandable how I managed to miss an update.

    May your Muse never abandom you in your work.
  8. AzureAngel2 Force Ghost

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    Jun 14, 2005
    star 6
    Qui-Gon?s brow furrowed. Why was the Council explaining all this to him? What did he have to do with this girl?

    ?Who is her guardian?? Qui-Gon asked.

    ?Qui-Gon,? Yoda said. ?Jane?s godfather, you are.?


    Unwilling and surprised guardians. Sounds familiar somehow. :D

    I bet Qui Gon would prefer a 2 AM wake-up call to this mess!
    ;)
  9. Gkilkenny Force Ghost

    Member Since:
    Mar 27, 2004
    star 4
    Interesting,=D= doesn't look like Anakin will get a look in seeing as Qui-Gon has to train Jane as soon as Obi-Wan is knighted.
    If he's seventeen and she's three she'll be old enough to be a padawan when Obi is knighted.

  10. Luna_Nightshade Manager Emeritus

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    Jan 25, 2006
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    Dun dun duuuuun.

    Looking forward to seeing how Qui-Gon reacts to this! Great update.
  11. mavjade It's so FLUFFY Fanfic & New Movies Manager

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    Well I bet that is a shock! LOL!

    ?After all those weeks on ration bars, I can?t wait to dig into the cafeteria food,? Obi-Wan said.
    [face_laugh] I don't think it's often people look forward to cafeteria food... any cafeteria! But after ration bars I'm sure it would be wonderful!


    Good update! Looking forward to more!
  12. Book-Geek Jedi Master

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    May 28, 2011
    star 3
    Hazel: Reactions are coming, I promise! [face_peace]

    Jade_eyes: I?m glad that you like Jane.
    (Shira_Adola has reintroduced me to the =P~ that is Qui-Gon) [face_laugh]

    Oh, that he is! And I hate to be redundant but =P~

    Shira_Adola:
    *Sniggers* He is a wonderfully attractive man ^^ although, I will admit I would rather take Obi-Wan.

    That?s perfect! Jade_eyes gets Qui-Gon, you get Obi-Wan and I get a teenaged Han Solo. It all works out in the end! ;)

    I?m glad that you liked the boys? banter. Banter is always fun to write.

    Although I hate cliffies. You couldn't have shown us Qui's and Obi's reactions before you ended?
    For better or for worse, this made me burst out into a peal of evil laughter. Either I?m doing something right, or I?ve officially joined the Dark Side.

    Lady_Misty: May your Muse never abandom you in your work.
    And may the Muse be with you, too!

    AzureAngel2:
    I bet Qui Gon would prefer a 2 AM wake-up call to this mess!

    Oh yeah, he would. ;)

    Gkilkenny: We shall see? [face_whistling]

    Luna_Nightshade: Thanks! I promise, I will post the Qui?s reaction to this bit of news in the morning.

    mavjade: You?ve got to remember, Obi-Wan is a teenage boy. He especially is looking forward to ?real? food after weeks of ration bars, whether it comes from a cafeteria or not!


    The next chapter is going to be posted in the morning, then I shall return to normal posting schedule. Thank you all for reading! [:D]

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  13. Book-Geek Jedi Master

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    May 28, 2011
    star 3
    Chapter Five: Decisions, Decisions



    ?Wh-what?? Qui-Gon sputtered out, looking between Master Yoda and Jane.

    But his question went unanswered as stunned silence hung in the air.

    ?Obi-Wan, Jane,? Bant said quickly. ?How about I take you down to the cafeteria while the adults talk??

    Not giving either a chance to respond, Bant ushered the tiny girl and stunned older apprentice out of the room while Qui-Gon continued to attempt to meet the eyes of the Council members, who were all either staring out the window or at their hands in their laps.

    Now the silence was just awkward. Qui-Gon was trying to decide which type he liked better.

    ?Qui-Gon,? Ki-Adi Mundi started. ?We know this is sudden, but you are the girl?s guardian, and you must train her.?

    ?I will respect Knight Mago?s wish,? Qui-Gon said. ?As soon as the girl is of age, I will train her.?

    ?No. You are to start her training immediately.? Joruus C?boath said.

    Qui-Gon stared at the Jedi Master in shock.

    ?But she is a youngling,? He said, stunned.

    ?She is young, yes, but she is very talented,? C?boath informed him. ?Upon testing her, we have discovered that she has a very high IQ and that many of her skills are advanced. She has an accelerated vocabulary, a high reading level, excels in math and science, and in history?a subject she has only been studying for merely a few weeks?she can recall the date of any battle or event. She is also advanced in many Force and saber techniques that no child her age has done before. If her formal apprenticeship training begins now, she can easily become a Knight in ten years or so.?

    ?A thirteen year old Knight?? Qui-Gon questioned.

    ?Yes, but then her training will continue on. She will train with different weapons, master the different fighting forms, and study with the best tacticians and military geniuses in the galaxy. She could do whatever she wants.? C?boath explained with a maniac gleam in his eye.

    As long as whatever she does is approved by a committee, Qui-Gon mentally finished, struggling not to grimace. He was appalled at what C?boath was alluding to:

    That the Council was planning on grooming a talented but innocent three year old girl into a super-solider Jedi.

    Qui-Gon had known that there were several members of the Jedi Order?led by C?boath?who believed that the Jedi should be the rulers of the galaxy, as they were ?supreme? beings because they had the Force. He was afraid that they were going to use Jane to get the power they thought they deserved.

    I need to find a way to figure out how serious they are about this, Qui-Gon thought hastily.

    ?What about Obi-Wan?? Qui-Gon asked. ?While he is indeed nearing the end of his apprenticeship, he still needs a few more years of tutelage and I would like to be the one who sees him off to Knighthood.?

    Qui-Gon had the brief satisfaction of seeing all of the ?Live by the Code or die? members of the Council have dark looks on their faces as Yaddle said, ?Two Padawans, you are to have, though against the Code it is.?

    All it took was one sentence spoken without proper grammar to confirm Qui-Gon?s fears.

    Qui-Gon found himself in a conundrum. On one hand, he felt he would doom the child if he said that he would take her on. But on the other hand he felt he would doom her if he declined, and she was sent off to another Master, one who would blindly follow the Council?s orders.

    But? if I take her on, I can at least protect her?

    ?I will take Jane as my apprentice.? Qui-Gon said after a brief moment of thought.

    ?Then we have no more to discuss,? C?boath said, a satisfied smirk on his face.

    And, with that, the Council members filed out of the room, except for the three Qui-Gon wanted to talk to.

    ?You want to turn the girl into a weapon.? Qui-Gon stated, not accusingly.

    ?They do, Qui-Gon,? Mace said softly. ?Unfortunately, it was put to a vote. Master Yoda, Master Gallia and myself were the only votes against. We were outnumbered.?

    ?Is she even my goddaughter?? Qui-Gon asked.

    ?She is,? Adi
  14. Valairy Scot Chosen One

    Member Since:
    Sep 16, 2005
    star 5
    Super Jane!

    Wonder how Obi-Wan will react - not favorably at first, I'm sure, having to share his master with a super star, incredibly talented, fated-to-be the youngest ever knighted padawan... or Obi'll be just as bespelled as Jane as everyone else.

  15. Hazel Force Ghost

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    Nov 9, 2010
    star 4
    Considering the Council's general attitude, I'm very relieved Qui-Gon accepted his charge. :) I hope Obi-Wan will like Jane and I hope she can ajust to both Qui-Gon and Obi-Wan.


    *

    On a little side note, Joruus C'baoth was the name of the clone in the Thrawn Triology. The one you want is Jorus C'baoth, with one u.
  16. Nyota's Heart Combos & Paragraphs Host

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    VEry nice details on Qui-Gon's reactions ;) and very nice summary of the different jedi schools of thought/philosophy. Personally, I like the realistic, balanced, nurturing stance of the Correllians. @};-

  17. Shira_Adola Jedi Master

    Member Since:
    Feb 15, 2011
    star 4
    his apprentice of many years who many days nearly worshipped the ground Qui-Gon walked on
    *sniggers* Isn't that just like Obi-Wan ^^
    Poor Padawan. He isn't going to like this arrangement.

    Leave it to Qui-Gon to thwart the plans of the Council[face_laugh] [face_laugh]
  18. mavjade It's so FLUFFY Fanfic & New Movies Manager

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    Good update!

    It's sad they wanted to make such a young child a weapon. I'm glad Qui-gon is the type to disobey that order. :)


    =D=
  19. obimom Jedi Grand Master

    Member Since:
    Oct 31, 2010
    star 4
    ok, finally read chapter two...very intriguing! And I agree with the others...she is very precocious - I can't wait to see how Obi-Wan, and not to mention Qui-Gon reacts to her.

    Will have to catch your other updates later... :) But good story so far...
  20. Lady_Misty Force Ghost

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    star 4
  21. AzureAngel2 Force Ghost

    Member Since:
    Jun 14, 2005
    star 6
    I love the Corellian support system a lot. They seem to produce more stable and balanced jedi personalities this way.

    What I do not like is the scheming and ploting of the council.

    ?You want to turn the girl into a weapon.? Qui-Gon stated, not accusingly.

    ?They do, Qui-Gon,? Mace said softly. ?Unfortunately, it was put to a vote. Master Yoda, Master Gallia and myself were the only votes against. We were outnumbered.?


    [face_worried]
  22. obimom Jedi Grand Master

    Member Since:
    Oct 31, 2010
    star 4
    Ok. all caught up, and liking this.

    I enjoyed the history of the Temple Jedi and Correlia Jedi and their differences. I wonder how Obi-Wan is going to react to suddenly having a "little sister"...this should be fun!

    Poor Jane, I hope Qui-Gon and Obi-Wan will be able to protect her from the schemes of those who want to "use" her....
  23. Luna_Nightshade Manager Emeritus

    Member Since:
    Jan 25, 2006
    star 5
    Yes, Super Jane! I like how Qui-Gon has come up with a way to work through the problem...but what about Obi-Wan? Interesting update!
  24. Book-Geek Jedi Master

    Member Since:
    May 28, 2011
    star 3
    Valairy_Scot: We shall see what one Mr. Kenobi thinks of Miss Jane soon enough.:D

    Hazel: On a little side note, Joruus C'baoth was the name of the clone in the Thrawn Triology. The one you want is Jorus C'baoth, with one u.
    Thank you![:D] I had tried searching him on Wookieepedia with the two U?s, but it said nothing about Outbound Flight, which confused me. I had only seen the original?s name once in a novel I read way too long ago.

    Jade_eyes: Personally, I like the realistic, balanced, nurturing stance of the Correllians.
    I do too. Learning about the Corellians was one of my favorite parts of I, Jedi and they were very fun to research.

    Shira_Adola: Qui-Gon does tend to get a kick out of messing with the Council?s heads, doesn?t he? [face_laugh]

    mavjade: I'm glad Qui-gon is the type to disobey that order.
    Qui-Gon will always disobey if the Council contradicts his morals. He doesn?t follow blindly. And that is my favorite part about him.:D

    Lady_Misty: This could get messy.
    Yeah, it could.[face_mischief]

    AzureAngel2: What I do not like is the scheming and ploting of the council.

    Yeah. The Old Order Council didn?t scare me till I saw Episode III and read the books. Now they just continously scare me.[face_worried]

    obimom: I wonder how Obi-Wan is going to react to suddenly having a "little sister"?

    We shall see.[face_mischief]

    Luna_Nightshade: Obi-Wan?s in for a few surprises from his dear old Master. And Obi-Wan rarely likes his Master?s surprises.
  25. Book-Geek Jedi Master

    Member Since:
    May 28, 2011
    star 3
    Chapter Six: A Brand New Mission! (What?s It Gonna Be?)


    Qui-Gon sat down on the bench, grateful for a chance to catch his breath. He had made the mistake of asking Jane to duel him, despite the warnings from the lightsaber masters. Not only was she good, but she never seemed to run out of energy. She had given Qui-Gon?who had planned on going easy on the girl?a decent beating before Qui-Gon called an end to the match.

    ?You were warned, Master,? Obi-Wan told his master dryly as he handed the man a cup of water.

    ?I know, I know,? Qui-Gon said between sips, trying hard to ignore the laughter coming from the trainers, whom Jane was recounting the battle to, despite the fact that they had been present the entire time.

    Qui-Gon studied Obi-Wan, who was looking at Jane with pursed lips.

    ?You are questioning my decision,? Qui-Gon stated, not accusingly.

    ?She is three years old, Master. I know she?s smart, I know her training had begun before she arrived here and that you are her guardian. But do you know how many initiates older than her are still waiting to become apprentices? And when they aren?t taken, they are shipped away, not even to return to their families? Why is she different??

    ?It is a complicated matter of politics that I will explain to you when the time is right,? Qui-Gon said. ?I understand your feelings on this matter. And I also agree with you.?

    Obi-Wan turned to his Master.

    ?Just because an initiate is not chosen does not mean they are not capable. It?s not fair that those that aren?t chosen are sent to the AgriCorps. The Code and the Council say that it is voluntary, but we both know it?s not.?

    ?Obi-Wan, if I could change the code, I would,? Qui-Gon said. ?And that was what Jane?s mother wanted.?

    ?She wanted us to live as the Corellians do,? Obi-Wan stated bitterly.

    ?And it?s just a coincidence that, throughout history, there has been no Corellian Sith Lords?? Qui-Gon asked, an eyebrow raised.

    Obi-Wan had no retort.

    ?I thought so,? Qui-Gon said as he rose to his feet. ?Now, come, I have something to tell both you and Jane.?

    Upon seeing Obi-Wan approach, Jane ran over to him excitedly and he cringed. Despite that Obi-Wan was bitter and slightly jealous of the girl and generally treated her indifferently, Jane adored him as if he were her brother. She always wanted to talk to him or show him something.

    ?Obi-Wan, Obi-Wan did?ja see that slash-and-parry move I pulled on Master Qui-Gon? Huh? Did?ja?? Jane asked, her big hazel eyes looking up at Obi-Wan expectantly.

    Before Obi-Wan could respond, Qui-Gon spoke.

    ?Jane, Obi-Wan, this morning the Council informed me that tomorrow we shall be leaving for a mission to the Hapes Cluster.?

    ?Yippee!? Jane exclaimed, jumping up and down, clapping her hands excitedly. ?I?ve read all about the Hapes Cluster! There?s 63 planets and they are all ruled by a Queen Mother. Qui-Gon, do we get to meet the Queen Mother? She?s getting remarried soon, isn?t she??

    ?Yes, we will be meeting her and her suitor, who will soon become her consort,? Qui-Gon said. ?We will be trying to find out who is trying to kill him.?

    Jane was excited by the entire prospect while inwardly, Obi-Wan was groaning. Stuck for Force-only-knows-how-long in close proximity to the Galaxy?s smartest, most hyperactive Force-sensitive three year old? Well, at least it was a mission?

    * * *

    The trio left the next morning without a hitch.

    It took five days for the Jedi to get to Hapes. Jane was thrilled. This was the first time since her arrival on Coruscant that she could leave and see a planet other than Coruscant and Corellia. And it was also her first time being free to do what she wanted while traveling.

    So, after asking what every single button in the cockpit did, she proceeded to get out paper and crayons and drew picture after picture. She also played music on a headset and danced for hours. The first ?day?, Qui-Gon let her stay up later than she should have because he couldn?t bear to make her stop having fun. By some u
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