Beyond His Eyes (Fear Factor Friday) Angst/Horror

Discussion in 'Fan Fiction- Before, Saga, and Beyond' started by Raphire, Nov 7, 2011.

Moderators: Briannakin, mavjade
  1. Raphire Jedi Grand Master

    Member Since:
    Dec 19, 2008
    star 4
    Title: His Eyes
    Author: Raphire
    Summery: Someone has their very own stalker and unfortunately her husband has his very own murderer.
    Additional Notes: This is for Fear Factor Friday. Also I don't own this that would be George Lucas


    She looked soooo peaceful. The way she lay all stretched out on the couch, her hair in disarray.

    His hand trembled as he pressed it against the glass. The cold of the window woke his mind, gave him the clarity to do what he knew needed to be done.

    He wanted nothing more to reach through the window and brush her hair from her face but HE was there. Her Husband was in the other room cleaning his guns.

    So he would wait? He would wait as long as it took for her to be alone. Then he would come to her? He would take her from this mundane existence; take her away to a life with him. That was where she belonged.

    But she wouldn?t see that, not with her Husband in the picture. Oh, how that man filled him with disgust. He had swooped in and took her right from his arms. Even after all of the things they had been through.

    They had been so close; all of them but then everything went wrong. People started to notice her and she did nothing to stop them.

    She brought all the attention to herself, getting in trouble and needing to be rescued? He had even saved her on multiple occasions but she never saw that. But of course she wouldn?t; she was an ambassador and he? He was nobody. Just another rebel for their cause.

    But that would all change soon.

    Soon her precious Husband would be gone from the picture and she would be desolate. With only him to turn to, for a comforting hug, a reassuring squeeze, a strong hard man to hold on to. One who would never let her down.

    They would be together forever? But first? The Husband.

    His eyes slowly shifted from the couch as The Husband entered the room. The Husband strode up to her and knelt before the couch. He gently stroked her cheek and whispered in her ear.

    She laughed and a shiver coursed through him. He watched The Husband?s lips move and his face darkened. The thought of that man?s breath caressing her ears made him sick. His fists tightened in anger and he felt like punching something.

    But he needed to relax? Follow the plan and then? Then she would be his.

    The Husband kissed her on her cheek and then stood to his feet. Then The Husband headed towards the door, he wouldn?t be home until late.

    Which left her home alone. But however tempting that was The Husband came first. He couldn?t have her until The Husband was dead. Then she would mourn and after words turn to him. Only then would they find true love.


    He slowly trailed behind The Husband as he wandered down the streets. The man would probably go to a bar, have a couple drinks, gamble, and then head home.

    Or at least that?s what he would do on a normal night. This night however? He would be lucky to even make it to the bar.

    The Husband was humming as he walked and seemed blissfully unaware of his stalker. Which was very good. Soon he would make it to some of the rougher neighborhoods and then he would strike. Then the man?s blood would be spilled before him.

    Then the Husband would die at his feet. Then The Husband would see his attacker and despair. Then The Husband would know that he was the superior man, that he was the one who deserved her. Not him, never that pitiful excuse of a man. He could barely afford to buy her that apartment. If anything he was living off of her money.

    The Husband paused and looked around. Then The Husband looked back and smiled. He strode back towards his stalker.

    ?Hey! I haven?t seen you around in a while! You want to have a drink or something? I?m buying tonight.?

    He stared at the man in surprise but then managed to force out a strangled.

    ?Ummm. Sure. Where are you headed??

    The Husband grinned happily. ?Just planning on club hopping until I find someplace interesting.?

    His stalker grimaced and then replied. ?Yeah I think I will join you.
    Kingsdaughter613 likes this.
  2. Maggy Force Ghost

    Member Since:
    Oct 2, 2004
    star 4
    *claps hands* awesome - an entry for FFF :D

    Oh sweet Force! I didn't see that coming :eek:
    Considering that she is his sister - this even makes him more twisted and not right in his head

    really awesome :D well done!!! =D=
  3. Jedi_Lover Force Ghost

    Member Since:
    Nov 1, 2004
    star 5
    Oh wow, I really hope Luke doesn't know Leia is his sister...otherwise this story will be twice as disturbing. Great fic. Very dark and creepy.
  4. Ceillean Force Ghost

    Member Since:
    Nov 13, 2001
    star 5
    This was awesome. Could have been an episode right out of Criminal Minds. :D

    And you know, since Luke used a knife, it supposedly means he really, really, REALLY hated Han.

    Thoroughly enjoyed this!

    =D=
  5. Briannakin Grand Moff Darth Fanfic Manager

    Manager
    Member Since:
    Feb 25, 2010
    star 5
    Luke! You creeper! I really hope that in this, Luke and Leia didn't know that they were twins.

    Very twisted. Bravo!
  6. Luna_Nightshade Manager Emeritus

    Member Since:
    Jan 25, 2006
    star 5
    Eeeeek! Very creepy. I like how you kept the characters' identities secret through the whole thing...and Luke and Leia? Just... yep, there's the horror! Great job!
  7. Jade_Pilot Force Ghost

    Member Since:
    Dec 10, 2005
    star 5
    Evil. [face_devil] And you had me sooo fooled.

    Woot! =D=
  8. mavjade It's so Fluffy Fanfic & New Movies Manager

    Manager
    Member Since:
    Sep 10, 2005
    star 5
    Very disturbing but very good.

    You kept me guessing as to who it was going to be and I didn't see that coming! I just kept thinking, most people are killed by someone you know!
    :p


    Good job! =D=
  9. DaenaBenjen42 Force Ghost

    Member Since:
    May 15, 2005
    star 5
    I'm still not sure what to say here... but I loved the twist there, because it wasn't who I thought it would be.


    Well done, Raphire. :)
  10. Kingsdaughter613 Jedi Knight

    Member Since:
    Feb 26, 2013
    Amazing. Simply amazing. Such a twisted Luke... Now the boards had better get fixed - so many great stories I want to read!
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