JCC How do I deal with SharpSpring

I'm a graphic designer. I got an unsolicited email the other day.

"Hi Emmanuel!

You don't know me, but please let me have a moment of your time to introduce myself. I'm Whatever Whatsisface from SharpSpring and I have a wonderful marketing automation tool for marketing executives just like you!"

The email went on to try to sell me on some website that sends bulk emails and records the data. Or something like that.

I didn't reply, but a couple of days later, the same guy sent me a reminder. "We know you're extremely busy, but we looked at your website again and we really think we could be a great match!" And bla bla bla.

I was tempted to reply with the strongest words possible, but I deleted it again and forgot about it. Now I get their third email. An invitation to a seminar. From Whatsisface's colleage. "You don't know me, but..."

Now, question is: how best to reply?
What's the reply to end all replies? The one that makes them want to abandon their business and find a better way to spend their days? JCC, the world needs your help.

 

Go to the seminar and burn the building down.

 

Diggy's answer would get me in jail, and PG's answer would still keep them bothering other people. I need more.

These people send spam to sell a spam machine. They must be stopped.

 

Just rickroll them and move on with your life.

 

Change your email address.

 

I want their sense of purpose demolished. Nothing less will do

 

Only if you get caught.

Send them an email stating that you will be contacting your lawyer to file a harassment lawsuit should they email you again.

 

"This would be a huge help to my unsolicited email business, please send more info and the SharpSpring company contact list"

 

soitscometothis wins the thread; I rickrolled them.