How to Make the Love Story More Believable

Discussion in 'Attack of the Clones' started by Binary_Sunset, May 18, 2002.

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  1. Binary_Sunset Force Ghost

    Member Since:
    Oct 28, 2000
    star 5
    Have Obi-Wan and Anakin arrive on Coruscant with Padme. Instead of having Anakin and Padme have a 5-day relationship and then get married, make it known that the two Jedi had been stationed on Naboo for the last few years. This way Anakin and Padme can know each other.

    When it's time for Padme to flee Coruscant, have Anakin take her directly to Tatooine. ("Where can we take her that no one will expect? Everyone will expect Naboo... I know! Tatooine! Most people haven't even heard of it!")

    On the ship to Tatooine, cut the entire wretched conversation they have and replace it with this excerpt from the movie's Naboo meadow scene:


    PADME: You really don't like politicians, don't you?

    ANAKIN: I like two or three, but I'm not really sure about them. I don't think the system works.

    PADME: How would you have it work?

    ANAKIN: We need a system where the politicians sit down and discuss the problems, agree what's in the best interests of all the people, and then do it.

    PADME: That is exactly what we do. The trouble is that people don't always agree. In fact, they hardly ever do.

    ANAKIN: Then they should be made to.

    PADME: By whom? Who's going to make them?

    ANAKIN: I don't know. Someone.

    PADME: You?

    ANAKIN: Of course not me.

    PADME: But someone.

    ANAKIN: Someone wise.

    PADME: That sounds an awful lot like a dictatorship to me.

    ANAKIN: Well, if it works?



    Then, when they arrive on Tatooine and are in the rickshaw, have that small exchange about "negotiations with a lightsabre". That's a funny exchange.

    All the other dialogue from Naboo needs to be cut.

    After Shmi dies, it is imperative that Anakin not tell Padme that he slaughtered the Sand People. Instead, have the exchange in the garage go like this:


    PADME: I brought you something. Are you hungry?

    ANAKIN: The shifter broke. Life seems so much simpler when you're fixing things. I'm good at fixing things, always was. But I couldn't... Why did she have to die...why couldn't I save her? I know I could have.

    PADME: Sometimes there are things no one can fix. You're not all-powerful, Anakin.

    ANAKIN: Well, I should be! Someday I will be the most powerful Jedi ever! I promise you.


    Then Anakin breaks down into tears and Padme rocks him in her arms.


    By not having Padme know about Anakin's mass murder, it removes a serious impediment to the believability of their marriage at the end of the movie.

    But Anakin does need to tell someone. Who? Owen Lars. Have Anakin, in a stony, cold voice, tell Owen about the massacre. Have Owen look at him in disapproving shock, but say nothing. Then have Anakin walk away. This could play off of Owen's line in SW: (Beru had just said, "There's too much of his father in him.") "That's what I'm afraid of." (Which is said in a dark tone of voice.)

    So when do Padme and Anakin first express their love for each other? As they are being led into the arena. It is more believable this way for three reasons:

    1. She has known Anakin for a few years instead of a few days.
    2. Anakin hasn't been stalking her and feeding her awful lines.
    3. She doesn't know Anakin massacred women and children.
  2. bed_speling Jedi Knight

    Member Since:
    Jan 9, 2002
    star 1
    Hmmm...I like the deletion of the Naboo scenes. More economical, yet possibly tells the same story. Helps to reduce all this travelling-from-one-planet-to-another business during the middle portion of the movie. I always felt the Naboo scenes to be the weakest scenes in both TPM amd AOTC.

    Hey wait a minute, on second thoughts, if Anakin and Padme don't go to Naboo, then their love story would have to develop on Tatooine, wouldn't it? This might 'overload' the Tattoine sequences, because you have both the massacre AND the love story to contend with.

    Interesting idea to make Anakin confess not to Padme but to Cliegg. I'm sort of on the fence on this one, because I wonder if Padme's knowledge about the massacre have bearing on a plot point of Ep3?
  3. baggles Jedi Master

    Member Since:
    Jun 18, 1999
    star 4
    What's wrong with having Padme know about the killing???
    Tuskens are "vicious mindless monsters" that killed and tortured innocent people. Its no different than killing the Geonosians.
  4. bed_speling Jedi Knight

    Member Since:
    Jan 9, 2002
    star 1
    Binary, I re-read your post, and realised what you meant. You meant to have Anakin and Padme's love story develop off-screen (by being on Naboo together all these past years before the actual events of AOTC)?

    Your post certainly has me tinkering in my mind with the editing/story of AOTC. But I'm not sure if we could a better job than GL. But it's certainly fascinating to toy around with alternative story sequences.

    If people here have alternative ideas for story sequences I guess this would be the appropriate thread to share them.
  5. QuiGonJinn84 Force Ghost

    Member Since:
    Aug 20, 1999
    star 2
    One of the points of the love story is that it IS rushed. It does develop too quickly - yes they love each other. Do they belong together? Maybe, probably not - but they went in too quickly and this is one reason why it ends in tragedy. By the way - How long did Romeo and Juliet know each other?
  6. JediStrider Jedi Master

    Member Since:
    Feb 18, 2002
    star 3
    Agreed, Padme falls in love with him because of the events happening around them and the fact that she's never been with anyone else who's quite so honest, brash, and skilled (remember, she deals with politicians day in and day out, so Anakin is a breath of fresh air). That there romance is so quick is a testament to Anakin's decision to act on emotion rather than rational thought, and that leads to their undoing. Like Qui Gon said, Romeo falls in love with Juliet in ONE day, from the moment they meet. No one has a problem with that. Why? Because one is Shakespeare and the other is George Lucas.
  7. Binary_Sunset Force Ghost

    Member Since:
    Oct 28, 2000
    star 5
    Bed speling wrote: "Interesting idea to make Anakin confess not to Padme but to Cliegg."

    Not Cliegg. Owen. That can give a new significance to Owen's dark look and line in SW ("That's what I'm afraid of.") The old Owen would be thinking, "Anakin was a woman- and child-murdering monster. I don't want Luke to be anything like that.")
  8. Binary_Sunset Force Ghost

    Member Since:
    Oct 28, 2000
    star 5
    Baggles wrote: "What's wrong with having Padme know about the killing???"

    That is a huge obstacle to the believability of the love story. Padme isn't a complete and total idiot. Why in the world would she marry someone who took out children a couple days before?
  9. Corusca-Gem Jedi Padawan

    Member Since:
    May 18, 2002
    What was wrong about killing the Tuskins (in the context of this discussion) is the fact that he killed the women and children as well. In the novelization he admits that they are not the fighters, only the males. In fact they were running away for cover and he chased them down.

    But even forgetting the novelization, is it a stretch to see that killing women and children is warped? Perhaps some people thought that the women and children were attacking him? While watching the movie I took it to mean that he struck them down when they were defensless - thus the term slaughter.

    This really made the love story seem shaky to me. Would Padme have really have stayed. The longer she would have been in love with him, the more of a chance of it.

    The suggestions that started this post are interesting. I do agree with the concept of a longer cortship, but would have rather had the movie start the same way, but then have something to let us know that months had past. Mabye some time did pass before the marriage.

    And I would have extended the scene with Anakin showing more remorse for what he had done. I mean a couple scenes later he is smiling.

    However I do see the merit as well in Anakin not telling Padme at all, and instead telling someone else. Now here I could say that he could tell her in EPIII, but who knows what Lucas has to fill the scenes in EPIII, so mabye it wouldn't work there.

    But again, was the reaction of Padme realistic? I mean this was a shocker.
  10. Binary_Sunset Force Ghost

    Member Since:
    Oct 28, 2000
    star 5
    Bed speling wrote: "You meant to have Anakin and Padme's love story develop off-screen (by being on Naboo together all these past years before the actual events of AOTC)?"

    Think of it like Han and Leia's love story. They knew each other for a couple of years before they fell in love. That's what I'd do with Anakin and Padme. I wouldn't have them be in love at the beginning of AOTC. I would, however, have the movie start with them knowing and liking each other. They would fall in love under the pressures of the events they are thrown into in AOTC.
  11. Sifo_Dyas Jedi Knight

    Member Since:
    Apr 11, 2002
    star 1
    I like that idea (the Owen confession and the cutting of the Naboo portion of the movie), but I like the fact that their romance was really rushed, so I wouldn't do the whole backstory thing where they've known each other for the past couple of years.

    Remember that this is a DOOMED romance. It's supposed to be a bad decision on both their parts. And therefore I liked the fact that it was such a rushed marriage based on a shared ordeal on Geonosis. But you're right, the Naboo thing was pointless; it didn't even make sense plot-wise, since Naboo is the FIRST place a potential assasin would look for Padme. Duh.
  12. Binary_Sunset Force Ghost

    Member Since:
    Oct 28, 2000
    star 5
    QuiGonJinn84 wrote: "How long did Romeo and Juliet know each other?"

    Not long, but Juliet was thirteen years old. Padme isn't a moronic girl in her first year of teenagerhood. She spent almost her entire teenage years being queen of an entire world! Since then, she's been a galactic senator. She's 24 years old, with ten years of maturity under her belt. It's out of character for her to act like a love-struck 13-year-old.
  13. Binary_Sunset Force Ghost

    Member Since:
    Oct 28, 2000
    star 5
    Also (in regards to the killing of women and children), if this wasn't an evil thing to do, then this pivotal scene had nothing to do with Anakin moving towards the dark side! That was the Emperor's theme playing in the background during the confession! Further, why would Qui-Gon's voice yell, "Anakin, no!" if all he was doing was killing some animals like rabbits or goats?
  14. Riley Man Jedi Grand Master

    Member Since:
    Dec 19, 1999
    star 5
    Cut Scenes. I actually think just adding the "More Remorse for Tusken Slaughter" scene is the only thing I would've added.

    I liked the way the love story pans out. Padme is so frustrated at the events and the fact she can't vote, and Anakin really takes advantage of that. He may not realize he's taking advantage in that manner, but he is. He uses that combined with a little bit of charm, some powerful eye contact (this is a big one for women!), and he even gets on her nerves on a few occasions. People quite often do fall for those that they shouldn't, and this whole scenario showcases that. These two ended up falling in love because of Anakin's obsessive behaviour, Padme's frustration (even panic), and even out of a twisted kind of convenience.

    Anyone watching this movie should've wanted to pull Anakin away from her. And that's the way it should be.

    The whole thing shows just how powerful Palpatine's manipulations are that he can have such an indirect affect on everyone. He was the one who suggested Obi-Wan protect her, and it's very possible he knew of Anakin's obsession with her.
  15. foxbatkllr Jedi Grand Master

    Member Since:
    Jul 27, 2001
    star 6
    Okay, okay I have a better Idea. How about you make your own version of AOTC with your own love story and see how many people come and see it.
  16. Binary_Sunset Force Ghost

    Member Since:
    Oct 28, 2000
    star 5
    Sifo Dyas wrote: "Remember that this is a DOOMED romance. It's supposed to be a bad decision on both their parts."

    Yes, and the fact that Padme is marrying a child-murderer (even if she doesn't know it) lets the audience know in no uncertain terms that this is a doomed romance.

    Also, why must the marriage be a bad decision on Padme's part? The PT is about the fall of Anakin. It is sufficient for him to make wicked choices. There is no need for Padme to make wicked choices. In fact, I will feel less sorry for her in E3 precisely because she knew what she was getting into. ("Anakin massacred some children yesterday, but I'll blow that off and marry him!") I'd have a lot more sympathy for her if she didn't know about his crime.
  17. Sifo_Dyas Jedi Knight

    Member Since:
    Apr 11, 2002
    star 1
    Okay, okay I have a better Idea. How about you make your own version of AOTC with your own love story and see how many people come and see it.


    Shut. UP.

    When are you people going to realize that that ISN'T A POINT?
  18. Sifo_Dyas Jedi Knight

    Member Since:
    Apr 11, 2002
    star 1
    B_S, I agree that Padme shouldn't have known about the Tusken slaughter. However, what I was saying was that I didn't have a problem with the length of their relationship before the marriage.
  19. Binary_Sunset Force Ghost

    Member Since:
    Oct 28, 2000
    star 5
    Sifo Dyas took the words out of my mouth.

    EDIT: Oops. I misunderstood you, Sifo Dyas! (Regarding the length of the romance.) My bad. :)
  20. foxbatkllr Jedi Grand Master

    Member Since:
    Jul 27, 2001
    star 6
    Actually it's quite a point. The love story worked quite well for me. I am sick of so many people thinking they can do a better job. Fact is, they CAN'T.
  21. Binary_Sunset Force Ghost

    Member Since:
    Oct 28, 2000
    star 5
    Riley Man wrote: 'I actually think just adding the "More Remorse for Tusken Slaughter" scene is the only thing I would've added.'

    I'm very glad they cut that scene. When I first read that in the script, I was appalled at Padme sitting there making excuses for Anakin's mass murder spree. There was a thread here entitled "Padme is such an enabler!" (or something like that) in which I (and several others) expressed our complete disdain for Padme. By taking that out, her character ceases to be wicked and becomes merely unwise.
  22. PLO--KOON Jedi Master

    Member Since:
    Aug 3, 2001
    star 4
    Binairy , Why do you have to second guess like this? GL did the story the way HE wanted so except it and stop saying "well if I were in charge I would have done this" because your not in charge.
  23. Binary_Sunset Force Ghost

    Member Since:
    Oct 28, 2000
    star 5
    PLO--KOON, I'm trying to offer some constructive criticism here. Instead of just saying, "It sucks," I'm trying to find some ways that it could have been better.
  24. Corusca-Gem Jedi Padawan

    Member Since:
    May 18, 2002
    Binary Sunset wrote

    "I'm very glad they cut that scene. When I first read that in the script, I was appalled at Padme sitting there making excuses for Anakin's mass murder spree. There was a thread here entitled "Padme is such an enabler!" (or something like that) in which I (and several others) expressed our complete disdain for Padme. By taking that out, her character ceases to be wicked and becomes merely unwise."



    By adding a remorse scene in, I should have said a different one than the one that was apparently filmed and cut.

    I would like to see Anakin express more remorse, him saying he was so sorry, etc. But have Padme remain silent and shocked as he collases into her arms. I would not want to see her as an enabler, just a confused listener. No excuses from her, just a look of confused shock. The confusion coming from her feelings for him vs. the horrors she can hardly comprehend.

  25. ShaneP Ex-Mod Officio

    Member Since:
    Mar 26, 2001
    star 6
    "That is a huge obstacle to the believability of the love story. Padme isn't a complete and total idiot. Why in the world would she marry someone who took out children a couple days before?"

    Sorry Binary but gotta disagree with you strongly on this one.

    First, you cannot compare this love story with the Han/Leia one. That one was a happy ending. This one is a trajic love story.

    What you have in Anakin is a needy, obsessed, immature young kid basically.

    Padme is so dedicated to her job she doesn't give herself time to have a relationship.

    These are two inexperienced young adults basically thrown together due to other circumstances.

    You ever read Romeo and Juliet?

    C'mon Binary you're married and have kids. That's reality.

    This is two young lovers in a fantasy! Believability? How about Anakin sittin' in the Lars' garage with a six-pack of blue milk while Padme' shoeless and with no makeup sonders in:

    Padme: You pig!
    Anakin: Don't make me go darkside wench!

    What would you rather spend two hours watching at the theatre? :)
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