**HUMOR** Star Wars Quotes in Game Terms

Discussion in 'Games: RPG & Miniatures' started by Jedi Merkurian, Jun 14, 2006.

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  1. Rogue_Thunder FanForce CR, Edmonton, Alberta, Canada

    Chapter Rep
    Member Since:
    Jan 7, 2003
    star 6
    "That boy was our last hope."

    "No, there is another with the Skywalker Special Quality"
  2. Jedi_Matt Force Ghost

    Member Since:
    Jul 11, 2002
    star 4
    Threepio! Get Artoo to use computer use to shut down the garbage compartment in the detention level!

    "Oh no... listen artoo, they failed their fortitude rolls"




  3. Koohii Jedi Grand Master

    Member Since:
    May 30, 2003
    star 5
    "Using my 8D of command, I'm going to make you all coordinate efforts to evacuate the most people in the least time. Your x-wings will combine sensor ops rolls to get the transports past the blockade while the ion cannon crew will incapacitate the star destroyers in your path. In the meantime, here's more strategic babble to that you'll be willing to risk your lives for strangers. Good luck." (grumble) "npcs"

    "Listen to my calm soothing voice while I make a series of sneak movements to shoot you under the table where you can't see. And no, you don't get to shoot first."

    "A lightsaber... it's a separate weapon skill under dexterity that no-one but a jedi would develop. An elegant weapon for a more civilized age. Carefully, now. Roll less than a 10 and you'll have to resist 5D+your control of 1D damage, never mind what it would do to my furniture."

    "Is the Dark Side stronger?"
    "No. Quicker. Easier. More seductive. For each DSP you gain, your effective force powers are 1d stronger, but each time you gain one, there's an ever increasing chance of going to the dark side permanently. Oh, 1DSP isn't a problem for a short-term boost early in your career, so long as you repent it later. But after that there's a 16.67% cumulative chance each time you gain another of being lost to the dark side. Of becoming an NPC that your replacement character will have to fight...
    If once you start down the dark path, forever will you be an NPC"

    "He has a lot of points in gambling and con, and a high PER attribute. You'd like him."
  4. MercenaryAce Force Ghost

    Member Since:
    Aug 10, 2005
    star 5
    "This superlaser +1 is now the ultimate power in the universe. I sugest we use it."

    "That attack of opertunity came from the Death Star!"

    "Your sad devotion to that anceint skill path has not given you enough bonus points to farsee the location of the rebels hidden fortress or conjure up the stolen datatapes."
  5. Koohii Jedi Grand Master

    Member Since:
    May 30, 2003
    star 5
    "The 16 I rolled to identify alien races tells me that your a Gungan, an aquatic race that cohabitates my planet."
    "uh HUh!"
    "What's your backstory?"
    "I don't know. I was having a pleasant day with brea--"
    "IN CHARACTER"
    "Ah crap. Moi no know. Moi was having nicey okeyday with brisky morning munchies when--"
    "Forget it. I failed my languages roll. Can you just talk normally?"
    "NuhNuhNo. Required by the GM, it is."


    "No givingk up, JarJar"
    "Oh, moi failed morale roll. Moi give up."


    "Here, a kiss for the +2 morale bonus"

    "Luke!"
    "Carrie!" (oh, I should have called out your character's name, huh?)
  6. Gry Sarth Ex 2x Banhammer Wielding Besalisk Mod

    Member Since:
    Jun 24, 1999
    star 5
    -"Physically she is in perfect health but for reasons we can't explain we are losing her."
    -"She's dieing?!"
    -"We don't know why. She has simply lost the will to play. She's missed four gaming nights in a row and I'm sick and tired of her character droning around in the culmination of my campaign. So I've decided to kill her character off. There, she lost the will to live. We must roll (A)Medicine quickly if we are to save the babies."
    -"Babies?"
    -"She is carrying twins. I thought we could maybe use them as PCs on a future campaign I'm planning."
  7. Rogue_Thunder FanForce CR, Edmonton, Alberta, Canada

    Chapter Rep
    Member Since:
    Jan 7, 2003
    star 6
    Sebulba (after crashing during the podrace): "Poodoo! I failed my pilot check"

    Qui-Gon Jinn (during the final duel, when the shield wall goes up, seperating him from Darth Maul): "Do I have time to use Heal Self, and 're-cast' Battlemind?"

    "I am a Jedi, like my father before me... but I don't yet have the Block class feature, so you can fry me with your Force Lightning."

    "That is why you fail... your Move Object check."

    "Artoo, use Repair to lock down the stabalizer"

    "Well, I'm not detecting any cities or technology, but maybe I failed my Computer Use."

    "I can't see a thing in this helmet!"
    "You don't need to see to use the Deflect class feature"



  8. Koohii Jedi Grand Master

    Member Since:
    May 30, 2003
    star 5
    She's missed four gaming nights in a row and I'm sick and tired of her character droning around in the culmination of my campaign. So I've decided to kill her character off. There, she lost the will to live.

    [face_laugh] [face_laugh] [face_laugh]
    Ah, so true, so true...
    How many times that has happened...
  9. Gry Sarth Ex 2x Banhammer Wielding Besalisk Mod

    Member Since:
    Jun 24, 1999
    star 5
    Thanks, I always thought Padmé in Ep3 was very similar to a PC with an absent Player. All of a sudden she's missing all the action and acting out of character, and in the end she just dies for no better reason.


    Qui-Gon: "Roll Perception, not Knowledge. Use your instincts."
  10. Nktalloth Jedi Knight

    Member Since:
    Sep 5, 2005
    star 1
    This wasn't in the movie, but it's assumed.
    I'm also assuming it's The Accuser under Admiral Piett which is taken out by the rebel Kamekaze in ROTJ...

    PIETT: Well, ****. Does anyone here have skill in repair?
    EVERYONE ELSE: No.
    PIETT: Hm. Well, someone go get the rulebook so we can figure this out before-
    ****

    **** is of course the sound made by the Accuser crashing into the Death Star version 1.5.
  11. Donp Jedi Knight

    Member Since:
    Mar 5, 2003
    star 1
    "These federation types have low Will saves. The opposed diplomacy checks will only take a few rounds"

    "A Jedi uses the Force for Knowledge checks and to enhance his defense, NEVER for Battlemind"
  12. Jedi Merkurian Episode VII Thread-Reaper

    Manager
    Member Since:
    May 25, 2000
    star 6
    "That damage reduction is too strong for blasters!"


    "What junky hull dice!"
    "She may not look like much, but she's got it where it counts. I've even made a few modifications to her engine dice myself."
  13. Koohii Jedi Grand Master

    Member Since:
    May 30, 2003
    star 5
    **** is of course the sound made by the Accuser crashing into the Death Star version 1.5.

    The Accuser? is this an alternate name for The Executor?

    I find it odd that some fans can't aggree on the pronunciation of the ship. Some make it sound like a leagal term, similar to executive, and some pronounce it like the guy in the black hood next to the gallows.
  14. TheTatooineRexTrader Jedi Knight

    Member Since:
    May 16, 2006
    star 1
    Yes it was the Executor (I say it like the man who kills the prisoners) which was hit by the A-Wing then crashed into the Death Star. However, Piett was the pilot.
  15. Koohii Jedi Grand Master

    Member Since:
    May 30, 2003
    star 5
    "At last, we will make opposed initiative checks against the Jedi. At last, we will have our plot development"

    "No more 1's on tactics checks. You are in command now, Admiral Piett. I suggest you add a few skill points to your command and tactics skills"

    "What's the matter, girl? Did you make a spot check?"

    "Their speed dice are higher than my fire control!"
    "Stop complaining kid, and lead your targets."

    "What are you doing? R2-D2, you know perfectly well that droids aren't allowed to modify other droids without supervision. Besides, the GM isn't watching you roll--he may arbitrarily decide your result is a failure that could blow up this poor droid."

    "Threepio? Who is threepio? with all these weird names George has been throwing at me, I can't tell for certain whether it's a jedi with a silly moniker or a droid."

    "I was thinking of transfering the the Academy this year"
    "What? You want to bargain with me? I have 3 more dice than you do. Give over your daydreaming and spend a few more points until you've upped your skill by a full D. Maybe then you'll get lucky enough to get the recursive 6 to work in your favor. Now tomorrow you'll take those droids to Anchorhead, make a moderate tec roll, and wipe their memories. That'll be the end of it. They belong to us now."
  16. Zarm_Rkeeg Jedi Knight

    Member Since:
    Jan 9, 2003
    star 3
    Much as I hate to say it... though it's a common misconception (one I labored under until just last year or so,) there is no such killer-man as an 'Exectuor.' The word is 'Executioner.' An Executor, (like the legal team,) one who carries out the will of another, is the word (and general purpose) of the Super Star Destroyer that crashes into the DSII.

    Crummy.

    But not as bad as Timothy Zahn's pronunciation... "Joar-uss Sab-ae-awth?" :oops:
  17. Koohii Jedi Grand Master

    Member Since:
    May 30, 2003
    star 5
    "This battle station has the highest damage dice codes as well as a higher scale modifier than anything else in the galaxy. I suggest we use it."

    "The empire doesn't consider starfighter scale weapons to be a serious threat, or they'd have tighter defenses."
    "What good's a 9D starfighter scale weapon going to be against that thing, which has 4 extra dice, just because of scale difference?"

    "Han, BE careful. Take extra time for the +1D bonus."
    "Hey, it's me."

    "Only the Sith speak in such extremes. At least 4 sides, the dice have. Sometimes 20, there are. 30-siders, have I seen."

  18. Jedi Merkurian Episode VII Thread-Reaper

    Manager
    Member Since:
    May 25, 2000
    star 6
    "Please, Master Yoda. Let me kill the Emperor."
    "Strong enough to face a 20th level Sith Lord you are not."

    "No more training do you require. Already have you enough experience points."
    "Then I am 7th level..."
    "No, one thing remains. Vader, you must face Vader. Then, only then, will you get the Jedi Knight bonus feat."

    "Confer upon you a 7th level of Jedi Guardian the Council does. But agree with you taking levels of Jedi Master I do not!"
  19. Nktalloth Jedi Knight

    Member Since:
    Sep 5, 2005
    star 1


    Actually yes. I only know the name from a lucasarts game what called it that. Or I have a completely different ship in mind and I got the two names switched around.

    "I have the high ground, which gives me +4 to agility!"

    "In my experience, there's no such thing as unloaded dice." -(Obi-Wan regarding luck)

    "She's rolling two similar character sheets." -(Birth of Luke and Leia)

    "*Kiss* For a skill bonus." -(Leia, when Luke was jumping the gap in ANH)

    This has nothing to do with game terms, but I couldn't pass it up.

    "We can rebuild him. Make him taller, darker, and more wheezy." -(Palpatine, regarding burned Anakin)
  20. Darth_Laudrup Force Ghost

    Member Since:
    Jul 7, 2004
    star 4
    "You've never heard of the Millenium Falcon?"
    "Should I have?"
    "It's the ship that made the Kessel Run in less than 5 parsecs, she has a x½ Hyperdrive Multiplier and a x10 Hyperdrive Backup"
  21. Jedi_Rhysode Jedi Master

    Member Since:
    Jan 15, 2004
    star 2
    Luke: "Look Uncle Owen, this droid failed it's Fortitude save"
    Owen: "Hey, what kinda Bluff check are you trying to roll passed me?"

    Tarkin: Obi-Wan Kenobi? What makes you think so?
    Vader: A Tremor in the Force. The last time I felt it was in the presence of my old Master
    Tarkin: Surely he must be dead by now.
    Vader: Don't underestimate the See-Force class Skill

    Tarkin: Continue the operation, you may fire when ready.
    Leia: What!?
    Tarkin: You have far to little ranks in Sense Motive. Dantooine has too low of a reputation bonus to make an effective demonstration.

    Han: Great shot kid, that was a natural 20!
  22. Koohii Jedi Grand Master

    Member Since:
    May 30, 2003
    star 5
    "This one, long have I used Farseeing and Telepathy to watch...
    Always has he attmpting to Farsee using 1 pip of Sense and using perception rolls to scan the Horizon.
    Never making spot checks on where he was, using skill focus to assist with what he was doing.
    Experience and Skill Points, heh. Levels, bah. A Jedi craves not these things.
    You are a MunchKin!"

    "My father wasn't a PC Jedi Knight, he was an NPC on a space freightor with 4D in Astrogation."
    "You never made Sense Motive or Perception rolls against your your uncle's Con or Charisma modifiers, did you? He wanted you safe and home as a LVL1 NPC, not running arround the galaxy with old Obi-Wan on some damn foolish crusade for Experience or Skill points to make level."

    "Did you make that perception roll? They've shut down the main reactor. One more random hit in the aft quarter and the ship's hull structure points will be level 4 damage and we'll blow to pieces. This is a failed wisdom check, failed wisdom check. Where did the silver copy of me who was following right behind us go? Damn, I must have failed a perception roll against his Hide/Sneak."
  23. Jedi Merkurian Episode VII Thread-Reaper

    Manager
    Member Since:
    May 25, 2000
    star 6
    "You can't! He has to stand trial!"
    "He controls the Senate and the Courts! He has too many ranks in Bluff & Diplomacy to live!"

    (later)

    "Twenty!!! A natural TWENTY!!!!!!"
  24. Darth_Laudrup Force Ghost

    Member Since:
    Jul 7, 2004
    star 4
    "Unlimited FORCE POINTS, Unlimited FORCE POINTS!!!"
  25. Indigo_Jade Jedi Grand Master

    Member Since:
    Apr 23, 2002
    star 5
    "Track them!!! Make a Computer Use Check! They may come around for another pass!"

    "Captain Needa, the ship no longer appears on our scope."

    "They can't have dissapeared!! You must have rolled a 1 on your Computer Use Check because no ship that small has a cloaking device."




    "Great Chewie, great!! Next time you might want to spend a Force Point to make a Fortitude Save to resist hunger when we are on a mission to destroy an Imperial Installation!"




    "...and that, Lord Vader, was the last time they appeared on any of our scopes. Considering the Damage Reduction on our Star Destroyers compared to a tramp YT-1300, they must have been destroyed"

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