i am the ultimate battlefront 2 fan

Discussion in 'Games' started by jacktherack, Dec 13, 2012.

  1. jacktherack Force Ghost

    Member Since:
    Mar 19, 2008
    star 4
    i own all of the 4 versions of battlefront 2 released (legit copy's) the ps2,xbox,psp, and pc... i also am wearing an exclusive star wars battlefront 2 t shirt... anyone else think they are a bigger fan?
  2. Exomnius Jedi Padawan

    Member Since:
    Nov 30, 2012
  3. jacktherack Force Ghost

    Member Since:
    Mar 19, 2008
    star 4
    Family guy is so funny. Oh wait...
  4. jp-30 Manager Emeritus

    Member Since:
    Dec 14, 2000
    star 9
    I have 2 copies of each game, one unopened, and a Battlefront 2 keyring attached to my nipple.
    Last edited by jp-30, Dec 17, 2012
    RC-1991 and Ender_Sai like this.
  5. Ender Sai Chosen One

    Member Since:
    Feb 18, 2001
    star 9
    You're proud of being a fan of a terrible, terrible game?
  6. son_of_skywalker03 Force Ghost

    Member Since:
    Dec 7, 2003
    star 4
    The 1st and 5th posts in this thread are awful. I think I'm done here.
  7. Legolas Skywalker Force Ghost

    Member Since:
    Sep 3, 2012
    star 6
  8. Anonymosity Jedi Padawan

    Member Since:
    Dec 19, 2012
    I do not apologize for the amount of space in this letter that I intend to devote to telling you about Battlefront 2. Here's how this letter works: I'll offer ideas and a theory to explain things. You bring your own experiences to bear on the matter of Battlefront 2's domineering self-fulfilling prophecies, supplementing them where necessary with information from this letter. Together we will get us out of the hammerlock in which Battlefront 2 is holding us. For those of you out there who don't know what I'm talking about, let me give you a quick explanation: Somebody has to denounce those who claim that Battlefront 2 has the linguistic prowess to produce a masterwork of meritorious literature. That somebody can be you. In any case, Battlefront 2 occasionally writes letters accusing me and my friends of being the worst classes of stubborn rascals there are. These letters are typically couched in gutter language (which is doubtless the language in which Battlefront 2 habitually thinks) and serve no purpose other than to convince me that it sees itself as a postmodern equivalent of Marx's proletariat, revolutionizing the world by wresting it from its oppressors (viz., those who bring fresh leadership and even-handed tolerance to the present controversy).

    I'm sticking out my neck a bit in talking about Battlefront 2's surmises. It's quite likely it will try to retaliate against me for my telling you that some day, its small-minded minions may ask you why you think it's a good idea to challenge Battlefront 2's claims of exceptionalism. If you're too stunned to answer immediately they'll answer for you, probably stating that it is Battlefront 2's moral imperative to trick our children into adopting unconventional, disapproved-of opinions and ways of life. You should therefore be prepared to tell these stupid bed-wetting cowards that if it would, just once, demonstrate real and genuine concern for others, Battlefront 2 might begin to realize that it craves more power. I say we should give Battlefront 2 more power—preferably, 10,000 volts of it. Battlefront 2 pretends to have the solution for everything. In reality, it creates more problems for the rest of us to solve. Consider, for example, how if you were to try to tell Battlefront 2's cringers that it is incapable of looking with an open mind at anything that doesn't strictly endorse its views, they'd close their eyes and put their hands over their ears. They are, as the psychologists say, in denial. They don't want to hear that I want to institute change. I want to do this not because I need to tack another line onto my résumé but because I would never take a job working for Battlefront 2. Given its besotted outbursts, who would want to?

    Battlefront 2 uses all sorts of psychological jujitsu to brainwash people into believing that we'll be moved by some heartfelt words on the glories of frotteurism. So, since the burden lies with me to tell you that, I suppose I should say a few words on the subject. To begin with, when I was a child my clergyman told me, "By following Battlefront 2's suggestions, we have become such poor caretakers of the tree of liberty that it has wilted and is sagging dangerously close to the ground." If you think about it you'll see his point. We've tolerated Battlefront 2's mean-spirited, dour principles long enough. It's time to lose our patience and chill our kindness. It's time to establish a "truth commission" whose charter is to investigate some of Battlefront 2's more narrow-minded cop-outs. It's time to shout to the world that it has spent untold hours trying to change this country's moral infrastructure. During that time, did it ever once occur to it that its lamentations have served as a powerful weapon with which prurient, besotted drossels can rally for a cause that is completely void of moral, ethical, or legal validity? Here's the answer, albeit in a somewhat circuitous and roundabout style: Its brain-damaged forces fundamentally believe that it has the trappings of deity. Alas, this deeply held belief is fiction from start to finish. Every piece of evidence I can find makes it abundantly clear that Battlefront 2's orations promote a redistribution of wealth. This is always an appealing proposition for Battlefront 2's habitués because much of the redistributed wealth will undoubtedly end up in the hands of the redistributors as a condign reward for their loyalty to Battlefront 2.

    The only weapons Battlefront 2 has in its intellectual arsenal are book burning, brainwashing, and intimidation. That's all it has, and it knows it. For Battlefront 2's foul-mouthed plans to succeed, it needs to dumb down our society. An uninformed populace is easier to control and manipulate than an educated populace. Before you know it, schoolchildren will stop being required to learn the meanings of words like "undiscriminatingness" and "microclimatological". They will be incapable of comprehending that throughout history, there has been a clash between those who wish to provide people the wherewithal to weaken the critical links in Battlefront 2's nexus of vicious, inhumane jujuism and those who wish to fortify a social correctness that restricts experience and defines success with narrow boundaries. Naturally, Battlefront 2 belongs to the latter category. Still, the issue of what to do about Battlefront 2's obdurate artifices is far from settled. The letter you just read should be seen as a starting point for dialogue on this controversial issue.
    Exomnius likes this.
  9. jacktherack Force Ghost

    Member Since:
    Mar 19, 2008
    star 4
    The ultra rare battlefront 2 nipple ring chain? Where did you find that, i heard they destroyed all the copies of that due to the great battlefront 2 massacre of 2006...
  10. DarthMak Force Ghost

    Member Since:
    Jan 4, 2001
    star 5
    I changed my middle name to Battlefront 2. Beat that!
    Admiral_Volshe likes this.