If I were a character in SW, I would NOT want to be...

Feel free to post any character you wouldn't want to be here. I thought about this last night while watching Ep V.

I would not want to be a co-pilot of Luke Skywalker. Consider R2 gets fried once (Ep IV) and falls into a lake and almost eaten in Ep V. Also consider his gunner at Hoth gets cooked after Luke tells him not to worry about the fire control system, "naahhh... we won't need that! Let's just take our chances."

I tell ya... Luke is a freakin' jinx to his partners! If I was told I would be partnered with Luke, I'd be running the other way!

Who would you not want to be?

 

Anyone without a last name....Notice how they seem to not last long?

 

I wouldn't want to be an Admiral anywhere near Lord Vader in ESB.

 

I wouldn't wanna be that guy Obi-Wan slices up in the bar.

 

The Rancor Keeper. Man, that guy really let himself go. And his pet died.

 

Anyone without a last name....Notice how they seem to not last long?

I thought they all have last names. Unless you consider guys like Biggs and Daq as not having last names because the movie doenst mention them. Well the movie doesnt name Wedge's last name (Antilles), and he lasts two death star attacks

 

Greedo, Greedo, Greedo!

 

Bobba Fett and any others who fall into sarlaac

 

Jabba the Hutt. I've been skinny my whole life, and being that fat would lead to suicide.

 

I would NOT want to be anyone that dies!

 

Or anyone who fell in the sarlacc (technically, they didn't die in the saga, they out lived everyone as they sat inside the sarlacc for the next thousand years).

 

Well, being the Emperor wouldn't be too great after getting tossed down the reactor shaft...

 

I wouldn't want to be Vader being horrible scarred and not being able to breath on my own and all. That would suck. Plus you would also have to look at the Emperor's ugly mug all the time.

 

My wife says she would not want to be Oola - the dancing girl that got thrown into the Rancor pit.

I, naturally, had to disagree with her. I would hate to be Neela, the one that survived. She had to see it happen and contemplate it possibly happening all the way up until after our man Jabba died.

 

I wouldn't want to be Boba Fett. I wouldn't want to be involved in any shady dealings with Vader of all people.

 

I would not want to be Bib Fortuna. He's easily corrupted by the Force and eventually dies on the Sail Barge. What a shame.

 

I wouldn't want to be 3PO. I mean really - everyone is always putting him down and getting annoyed by him. Poor guy probably needs counseling now...

-Bjork.

 

...I wouldn't want to be the guy who empties Vader's phlegm cup.

 

...I wouldn't want to be the emperor's chiropractor.

 

...and I DEFINATLY wouldn't want to work at the laundromat where Ben Kenobi drops his wash.

 

Padmé. I wouldn't want to marry someone 4 years younger than me, who is a brat and turns to the dark side. And I would die young, never having the chance to see my kids growing up.

 

Porkins.

Or whichever nameless Rebel pilot it was that screamed "Loosen up!" just before their X-Wing exploded. They're the worst final words I've ever heard.

I mean really, it sounds like something out of "Saturday Night Fever" or something. I expect a musical dance number to immediately follow......

 

A Death Star gunner.
Impossible job: try to hit small, quick thingies with a cannon that's designed to target slow capital ships, while those small fighters are trying to blow your station to tiny bits.
Must be frustrating...

 

Grand Moff Tarkin or Jec Porkins, thye just didn't see it comming

 

I would NOT want to be...

... played by Jake Lloyd in the movie version.




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