If Star Wars gaming was representative of the Star Wars Universe...

The multitudes of randomly placed crates would get shot to bits, just to see if there was a battery inside. {DF, JK, MotS, JO)

Arming yourself would be rather easy, as all sorts of guns and ammo is just left laying about the place. {DF, JK, MotS, JO)

 

If you drove your pod racer into rocks, the rocks would just blow apart and disappear. (Episode 1 Racer)

If you were incredibly strong in the dark side of the force, but couldn't force jump, see, pull or speed, you would have as a bonus FORCE DEADLY SIGHT. (JK Multiplayer)

 

If Star Wars gaming was representative of the Star Wars Universe...

...then you'd have to fly within 1/2 a kilometre of a stupid blue buoy to initiate a jump to hyperspace. (XWA)

 

Arming yourself would be rather easy, as all sorts of guns and ammo is just left laying about the place. {DF, JK, MotS, JO)

Being picky and OT, but you can probably scratch JO from the end of that list. The devs did an unusually good job of removing haphazard item placement last time around.

Look at the numerous imp installations Kyle visits for the best examples; instead of ammo and shield belts sprinkled on the ground in a non-sensical fashion like they were in the previous games, JO featured many mounted racks positioned to aid in the dispersion of ammo, shield and health packs to troopers guarding an immediate area. Quite logical and utlitarian in placement when compared with the previous three, where you might think troopers were playing some kind of shield soccer in random hallways.

Also [removed] for your amusement[/removed] a jkii.net thread relevant to this topic and specific to JO, especially multiplayer.

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[color=indigo]Yeah, actually it was that thread that gave me the idea for this one, as Aragorn says below. Feel free to pass it round via PM or whatever, but it's against policy to allow direct linking to pages linked with profanity, so I have to remove the link. :( [/color]

 

I'm pretty sure TFN policy doesn't permit links to cursing, but whadda I know?

I've seen that thread before though. Hilarious stuff!

 

You could only have 200 troopers at once.(Battlegrounds)

Your ship would always spin out for ten meters and explode if destroyed. (XWA)

Even though you kill someone, they could reply to you once they're dead. (JK)

Thermal detonators would only affect 4 feet of space. (JK)

10 stormtroopers would mysteriously appear from an empty room. (JK)

You'd be able to carry 9 weapons, 500 of two types of ammo and 18 det packs, 20 mines, lots of batteries, 8 shield packs, a datapad, 5 bacta tanks, and a grappling hook. (JK)

And finally...

MODS! (JK)

 

I've seen that thread before though. Hilarious stuff!

You talking about the one on JK.net boards? With the little air ballons and SW pics? If so yes funny stuff. My fav. one is the one with Darth,Boba,and Lando. Lando is shouting woohoo woohoo woohoo ect., then the other two say shut the "bleep" up.

 

Guess you had to be there.










Pat.

 

Enemy fighters would have floating red targeting lines surrounding them not on your targeting computer, but out your viewport.

After flying straight forward in one direction you hit an invisible shield and are repelled back the other direction. Dang energy shields.

 

Which game is that second one from?

 

SithForceLord,
Examples are Rogue Squadron, Battle for Naboo, etc. You can only go so far before hitting an invisible boundary.

 

ah, havn't played those.

 

You could pick up Security Keys by simply running over a dead Imperial's body.(JO)

As an Imperial you'd have to have a very good memory as all of your installations are basically big rat mazes with new signs on the walls giving directions.

There would be doors all over that never lead anywhere and were just there for looks...try "NoClip" on JO and see what I mean!

To open certain doors you'd have to climb 2 floors, walk accross a long rampway over a bottomless pit, figure out a Red/Green/Blue code system, and flip a switch in a room guarded by a dozen troopers. (JO)

 

All Imperial facilities would feature doors/ledges that can only be accessed by jumping on crates/flying yet are still somehow smothered in stormies - (JK JO)

The dialogue would consist of two phrases: "Hey, you there!" and "Hmmm, locked." - (JK JO)

 

Everyone who died would dissapear after a few seconds
Many worlds (including Endor, Coruscant and Geonosis) would be small, square and flat (GB, GB: CC)
A small group of ewoks, all of them called Simon, would be able to destroy dozens of enemy troops and buildings (GB)
I would have destroyed the first Death Star instead of Luke
There would be Death Stars smaller than a fortress and instead of destroying a planet with one shot it would take them three or four shots to destroy a big building (GB: CC cheat)

 

> A small group of ewoks, all of them called Simon, would be able to destroy dozens of enemy troops and buildings (GB)

Have you not seen Return of the Jedi?

 

Bib Fortuna would be able to shoot lasers out of his lekku. (Super ROTJ)

 

SoloC would get his backside handed to him time and time again in Lightsabre duels

 

If Star Wars gaming was representative of the Star Wars Universe...

anyone shot with a sticky rocket would not attempt to pull it out / off their body, but would instead

a) run around like a headless chicken
or
b) run toward the nearest or largest group of enemies in a half-assed suicide bombing attempt.


(JK & MotS)

 

If Star Wars gaming was representative of the Star Wars Universe...

...then you wouldn't need a stupid little blue buoy to jump into hyperspace. You'd use a nav computer or an astromech like in the movies. (XWA)

 

... then stortroopers would running around like headless ibis's when you yank their weapons off them, not realising that they have comlink to call for backup, thermal detonators on their belts, and supposedly other hidden weaponry (JO)

... then Rebels would run around screaming "the Empire's atacking" when you pull their guns off them (MotS)

 

Reborns would be waiting for you and if you shot at them with a disruptor or blaster they wouldnt even get fazed.
Jedi Outkast.

 

TIEs always fly around in neat pack in the middle of a massive battle, except wen u shoot their leader, in which case they crash into each other. (RL)

Stormtroopers and Imperial Officers can survive being run through with a lightsaber indefinately, unless the owner of the lightsaber actually swings it.(JO)

The favourite phrases of a stormtrooper are:
When someone throws a thermal detonator at them -"Is someone there?"
When they see a Jedi Knight- "Get out of my way" (JO)

 

...every imperial facility would be riddled with locked doors, making it next to impossible for Imp troops to get from one side of the base to the other - letalone a Jedi who'd snuck in. Yet AT-STs would be at their docking station, fully fuelled and charged up with their keys in the ignition ripe for a chickenwalkerjacking!