I'm dressing as a fake Sith Lord for Eppy 2 opening night

Discussion in 'Attack of the Clones' started by C Creepio, May 11, 2000.

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  1. C Creepio Force Ghost

    Member Since:
    May 25, 1999
    star 3
    Remember the week or so before TPM came out? How everyone would be in line for tickets and people would be dressed like Luke & Vader & Darth Maul.

    Well, you know E2 will have a new Sith, and everyone will be dressing like him before Episode 2. That's why I plan to show up at the theater on E2 opening night, dressed as some fool in some phony costume that I make up the night before. I'll have a toy lightsaber that I paint yellow. And when I stand in line, all the SW freaks will say, "Wow! Who's that? I didn't see that character in the trailer, or hear about him on the JC. Who is he?"

    And I'll smile and say "Darth Kimball"

    And everyone in line will say "Darth Kimball?"

    And I'll say, "Yeah! What are you nuts? You're a Star Wars fan and you've never heard of Darth Kimball?????"

    Then I'll shed my robes and watch the movie. Meanwhile, all the people in line will be watching Ep2, constantly scanning the screen for this mysterious Darth Kimball- who never shows up.

    Then all the Ep2 basher can say "Episode 2 sucked because Darth Kimball barely got any screen time!"


    Unlock and Bump
  2. IronParrot Manager Emeritus

    Member Since:
    Aug 2, 1999
    star 5
    A work of genius.

    Of course, some people might just dismiss you as another EU nut... I mean, I certainly didn't see any people dress up as Exar Kun for TPM, even though I did know some people that heard about the double-bladed lightsaber and thought, "Ah! That must mean Exar Kun is in it."
  3. Vertical Former Head Admin

    Member Since:
    Apr 6, 1999
    star 6
    I've notified the local media of your plans, Creepio. They're going to do a piece on you.

    You need to come up with some fake lines.

    Vertical
  4. C Creepio Force Ghost

    Member Since:
    May 25, 1999
    star 3
    Hey guys! Long time no threads.

    Darth Kimball is a dark Jedi who learned his skills by imitating what he sees on Jedi Battle Dome. He doesn't really have the force, but he has a lightsaber and makeup, so he's tough.

    Some of his more famous lines from Episode 2:

    "If I only knew the power of the Dark Side!"

    "At last, I will meet a real Jedi...."

    "Yes, Greedo, I was just going to see your boss."

    and

    "The Force??"

  5. IronParrot Manager Emeritus

    Member Since:
    Aug 2, 1999
    star 5
    Creepio, what theatre are you going to be at? I have to see you do this with my own eyes... LOL
  6. No blasters! Force Ghost

    Member Since:
    Feb 14, 2000
    star 4
  7. C Creepio Force Ghost

    Member Since:
    May 25, 1999
    star 3
    He'll also drive a broken landspeeder.

    This exact landspeeder will be the subject of debate for years and years as thousands of SW fans wonder if Darth Kimball's landspeeder ends up being used by Luke on Tatooine. Is that the same speeder? And if so, did Luke get it from Kimball himself? Is Uncle Owen Darth Kimball?

    And the answer to all these questions will be:


    no
  8. Vertical Former Head Admin

    Member Since:
    Apr 6, 1999
    star 6
    That's freakin' great. You should push people around in line.

    Vertical
  9. IronParrot Manager Emeritus

    Member Since:
    Aug 2, 1999
    star 5
    You'll need something more memorable than just an ordinary lightsaber that happens to be a rather unique saber color... something that will make the other people in line say, "WOW."
  10. Vertical Former Head Admin

    Member Since:
    Apr 6, 1999
    star 6
    Darth Kimball could hold his saber by the blade, and bash people with the handle.

    Vertical
  11. C Creepio Force Ghost

    Member Since:
    May 25, 1999
    star 3
    Hmmm...you're right. A lightsaber's not going to hack it. I want something that will churn the rumor mill for a good decade or two.

    How about I bring that Kaibur Crystal whatever-its-called?

    "Oh yeah, this? This is what Emperor Palpatine rubs every morning to be able to do those electric shocks. Seriously."


  12. C Creepio Force Ghost

    Member Since:
    May 25, 1999
    star 3


    Vertical- you're killin me!
  13. No blasters! Force Ghost

    Member Since:
    Feb 14, 2000
    star 4
    Hey, Creepio, just to let you know? I've seen you around thousands of time now. Can't believe how many places an average height, middle of the road clothes, regular car driving guy (in his 20's) can be at.

    Hey, we actually could be at the same theater! I want to see Darth Kimball, too!
  14. Vertical Former Head Admin

    Member Since:
    Apr 6, 1999
    star 6
    Yes, push people around, bashing them with the handle of the Yellow Saber, while screaming something like "Show me the Jedi!!"



    Vertical
  15. C Creepio Force Ghost

    Member Since:
    May 25, 1999
    star 3
    Really blasters? You need to stop me and say hi. I thought I saw you once, but the hair was kind of on the green side, ya know?

    Maybe Darth Kimball can throw candy into the crowd of moviegoers. Only it won't be candy- I'll use rocks instead
  16. No blasters! Force Ghost

    Member Since:
    Feb 14, 2000
    star 4
    HAHAHAHAHA.

    Don't know if you're serious, Creepio, but my hair was briefly pale green. It's flaming red now, like the lead singer of Bush or the girl from Run Lola Run. Actually it looks alot like hers. I'm trying to look a little less, how shall we say, odd? LOL
  17. Vertical Former Head Admin

    Member Since:
    Apr 6, 1999
    star 6
    Rocks! That's great. You'd have to wrap the rocks up in candy wrappers. That way people wouldn't immediately run screaming. They'd try to catch the rocks. Maybe a few would try to eat them.

    Vertical
  18. No blasters! Force Ghost

    Member Since:
    Feb 14, 2000
    star 4
    I can see the debates now.

    Why didn't Darth Kimball show up in the movie? He was really there as someone else!

    Boba Fett=Darth Kimball, I have proof!

    Aurra Sing is really Darth Kimball!

    Panaka IS Darth Kimball!
  19. Vertical Former Head Admin

    Member Since:
    Apr 6, 1999
    star 6
    Darth Kimball has the ability to cloak. He was there all along. He was actually in TPM, too. Remember in the final duel when Obi-Wan goes "Ungh!" and gets pushed back? That wasn't Maul using the force, that was Darth Kimball!

    "Always two, there are... a Master, and an apprentice. And there's this cloaked wannabe named Darth Kimball, but we can't worry about him"

    Vertical
  20. Darth Heinous Jedi Master

    Member Since:
    May 10, 2000
    star 1
    Darth Kimble is Yaddle's father. He turned to the Fake side of the force after Yoda Dumped her. His first name was Yodel. He was a singer at Jabba's Casino, known to Fraternize with Gamorrean Guards.
  21. No blasters! Force Ghost

    Member Since:
    Feb 14, 2000
    star 4
    Yoda was lying when he said there are only two. Where do you think Obi Wan got his "certain point of view from"?

    GL changes his mind all the time. Just cuz he tells us anything doesn't make it true!

  22. C Creepio Force Ghost

    Member Since:
    May 25, 1999
    star 3
    Heh.

    Eppy2- the final climax, in which everyone is in some big battle.

    The doors open with Duel of Fates and Darth Kimball stands in his robes. Obi-Wan & Anakin ignite their lightsabers as Kimball removes his cloak. When Kenobi sees his face, he shuts off his saber.

    Obi-Wan: Oh, you?

    Kimball: What?

    Obi-Wan: (to Anakin) Come on, this guys a chump.

    Obi-Wan and Anakin run right past Kimball to fight a real challenge- leaving Kimball watching them disappear, a look of alienation on his face.


    Kimball: Hey guys! Where ya going?...Guys?
  23. Vertical Former Head Admin

    Member Since:
    Apr 6, 1999
    star 6
    Hehe, the "Fake Side of the Force"...
  24. C Creepio Force Ghost

    Member Since:
    May 25, 1999
    star 3
    Oh- blasters, are you going to SW weekends at MGM? I'm going this weekend and on the 27th. I'll be looking for flaming red hair...
  25. Vertical Former Head Admin

    Member Since:
    Apr 6, 1999
    star 6
    I am laughing my A$$ off right now, picturing that scene, Creepio. Would Darth Kimball then become angry, and throw rocks?

    Vertical
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