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JCC IMDB Parental Guide? HELL. YES.

Discussion in 'Community' started by Rogue_Ten, Dec 8, 2012.

  1. Juliet316

    Juliet316 Chosen One star 10

    Registered:
    Apr 27, 2005
    The Lindsay Lohan version of The Parent Trap?
     
  2. Aytee-Aytee

    Aytee-Aytee Jedi Master star 5

    Registered:
    Jul 20, 2008
    Hehehe. Noooooo.

    This movie has a more talented cast. :p
     
  3. Rogue1-and-a-half

    Rogue1-and-a-half Manager Emeritus who is writing his masterpiece star 8 VIP - Former Mod/RSA

    Registered:
    Nov 2, 2000
    A video game killing, a swimsuit dancing scene and a philosophy about the basic worth of life? I'm stumped.
     
  4. I Are The Internets

    I Are The Internets Force Ghost star 8

    Registered:
    Nov 20, 2012
    It sounds like the Greatest Movie Ever Made regardless.
     
  5. Suzuki_Akira

    Suzuki_Akira Jedi Master star 7

    Registered:
    May 13, 2003


    ...Adanna?
     
  6. Rogue1-and-a-half

    Rogue1-and-a-half Manager Emeritus who is writing his masterpiece star 8 VIP - Former Mod/RSA

    Registered:
    Nov 2, 2000
    I love how now it looks like it was Rogue_Ten who said that quote.
     
  7. Rogue_Ten

    Rogue_Ten Chosen One star 7

    Registered:
    Aug 18, 2002
    that best thing about this guy is how obviously intelligent he fancies himself. it drips from every paragraph. like an evangelical ender sai
     
  8. Aytee-Aytee

    Aytee-Aytee Jedi Master star 5

    Registered:
    Jul 20, 2008

    Video Game Death = Buzz getting blasted by Zurg in Rex's video game.
    Philosophy about Life = Woody's dilemma about going back to Andy or the toy museum.
     
  9. Guinastasia

    Guinastasia Jedi Grand Master star 6

    Registered:
    Jun 9, 2002
    On another board I visit, this guy was going on about how all movies nowadays have too much nudity and sex, and how he can't enjoy anything with his son (12 years old) with it being ruined by gratuitous sex. Then he talks about how they were watching a really good movie, but it was spoiled by a topless scene. The movie in question? The Godfather. :oops:

    Actually, the animation in Polar Express is kinda creepy.


    Did anyone find it funny that the CAP guy even bothered to review South Park: Bigger, Longer & Uncut? Dude, what did you expect?

    (I was hoping to find a review of Schindler's List, but alas, not.)
     
  10. Rogue1-and-a-half

    Rogue1-and-a-half Manager Emeritus who is writing his masterpiece star 8 VIP - Former Mod/RSA

    Registered:
    Nov 2, 2000
    Can I do one?

    Wanton Violence/Crime (W)- Zero out of 100
    • action violence of varying intensity, frequent
    • breaking and entering
    • physical assault with multiple slaps
    • reckless endangerment with knives, repeatedly
    • threat with knife and broken bottle
    • multiple firearms to control
    • reckless gunfire
    • prison break
    • fighting with weapons
    • multiple assaults on law enforcement personnel
    • attempted murder by drugs
     
  11. Rogue_Ten

    Rogue_Ten Chosen One star 7

    Registered:
    Aug 18, 2002
    alright who gave CAP alert a virus? chrome is wiggin' out on every page

    is that v for vendetta?
     
  12. Rogue1-and-a-half

    Rogue1-and-a-half Manager Emeritus who is writing his masterpiece star 8 VIP - Former Mod/RSA

    Registered:
    Nov 2, 2000
    Nope. Here's the next bit:


    • Impudence/Hate (I) - 31 out of 100
    • desertion
    • regurgitation in detail
    • rampant destruction of private property
    • lying, repeatedly
    • wielding a knife to intimidate
    • physical rudeness
    • child being forced up an elephant's anus or vagina
    • masking of the most foul of the foul words
    • masked profanity, twice
     
  13. Jabba-wocky

    Jabba-wocky Chosen One star 9

    Registered:
    May 4, 2003
    Ace Ventura 2: Nature Calls

    Though wasn't it a rhinoceros?
     
  14. Rogue1-and-a-half

    Rogue1-and-a-half Manager Emeritus who is writing his masterpiece star 8 VIP - Former Mod/RSA

    Registered:
    Nov 2, 2000
    Good guess, but no.

    Here's the rest. I'll do the last three together since there's not much under the last two.


    • Sexual Immorality (S) - 64 out of 100
    • vulgar innuendo
    • reference to performing in the nude
    • attention to and animated display of human-like posterior, repeatedly
    • pelvic thrusts
    • women as toys/ornaments
    • exaggerated female anatomy (clothed), repeatedly
    • rude gaze

      Drugs/Alcohol (D) - 88 out of 100
    • use of tranquilizers to control, repeatedly
    • smoking

      Offense to God (O) - 92 out of 100
    • gambling
    • devil imagery
     
  15. Aytee-Aytee

    Aytee-Aytee Jedi Master star 5

    Registered:
    Jul 20, 2008

    I so want to say "Operation Dumbo Drop" because the thought of Denis Leary shoving the Vietnamese orphan boy into Bo Tat's rectum is just too awesome.
     
  16. Rogue1-and-a-half

    Rogue1-and-a-half Manager Emeritus who is writing his masterpiece star 8 VIP - Former Mod/RSA

    Registered:
    Nov 2, 2000
    Another good guess. But it's more recent than any of the movies mentioned thus far.
     
  17. Jabba-wocky

    Jabba-wocky Chosen One star 9

    Registered:
    May 4, 2003
    Why is it listed as "anus or vagina?" There was no way to distinguish between the two? Or did you add that to make it more ambiguous, which would suggest their are multiple movies that feature human beings being shoved into pachyderm orifices?

    I am not really sure I want to know the answer to all this.
     
  18. I Are The Internets

    I Are The Internets Force Ghost star 8

    Registered:
    Nov 20, 2012
    Well now I'm dying to know what movie this could possibly be?
     
  19. Rogue1-and-a-half

    Rogue1-and-a-half Manager Emeritus who is writing his masterpiece star 8 VIP - Former Mod/RSA

    Registered:
    Nov 2, 2000
    It's an exact quote from the website, so presumably it's difficult to distinguish in the movie.

    The movie is, of course, Madagascar 3: Europe's Most Wanted!

    It is worth noting that he gives the movie a 0 out of 100 score in the violence category, which is the worst possible score, I think. Yes, Madagascar 3 is as violent as movies get. Here's a quote from the review: It is indeed equivalent to some R-rated films in violence (W) and impudence/hate (I).

    Yup, if you're going to let your kid watch Madagascar 3, you might as well cue up Reservoir Dogs and make it a double bill. What is this guy smoking?
     
  20. I Are The Internets

    I Are The Internets Force Ghost star 8

    Registered:
    Nov 20, 2012
    He has the devine powah of Jeezus inside him! PRAISE THA LAWD!
     
  21. Aytee-Aytee

    Aytee-Aytee Jedi Master star 5

    Registered:
    Jul 20, 2008
    You misspelled it.

    It's "Jaheezahus". And he's not Jesus. Jaheezahus was Jesus' egocentric Pharisee cousin whom he hated with a passion.

    Jaheezahus was all like "Yeah! Stone this bitch!"
    And Jesus was like "Dude, are you [f-bomb] INSANE?"

    But King James cut that story out.
     
  22. I Are The Internets

    I Are The Internets Force Ghost star 8

    Registered:
    Nov 20, 2012
    Because King James was a ****.
     
  23. Guinastasia

    Guinastasia Jedi Grand Master star 6

    Registered:
    Jun 9, 2002
    Here's a good one:

    Wanton Violence/Crime (W)
    • attempted eating of animal character
    • threat of violence, repeatedly
    • coercing to kill
    • planning murder
    • imagery of nazi-esque servitude
    • physical assault, repeatedly
    • order to kill
    • threat to kill
    • animal attack to kill, repeatedly
    • trickery to kill
    • fight to the death
    • animal killing

      Impudence/Hate (I)
    • deceit with the young, betrayal, repeatedly
    • adolescent lie to mother
    • sneaking to defy parents
    • song of freedom from accountability
    • defiance of parental authority endangering one's own health and the health of another
    • lies, repeatedly, especially to deflect accountability and to falsely place guilt
    • violence during protective actions
    • "It's to die for"
    • coaching to run away
    • gross-out humor: eating insects
    • "You don't deserve to live"

      Sexual Immorality (S)
    • Homosexual suggestion by "Want me to dress in drag?"
     
  24. Boba_Fett_2001

    Boba_Fett_2001 Force Ghost star 8

    Registered:
    Dec 11, 2000
    The Lion King?
     
  25. I Are The Internets

    I Are The Internets Force Ghost star 8

    Registered:
    Nov 20, 2012
    Yeah it has to be that.