JCC Improve the condom, get $100,000 from Bill Gates

Discussion in 'Community' started by jp-30, Mar 25, 2013.

  1. I Are The Internets Chosen One

    Member Since:
    Nov 20, 2012
    star 7
    How about one that emits painful electric shocks when you're doing it wrong?
  2. harpua Chosen One

    Member Since:
    Mar 12, 2005
    star 8
    Glow in the dark bubble bath was invented by jesus.

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  3. Diggy Force Ghost

    Member Since:
    Feb 27, 2013
    star 4
    [IMG]
    Juliet316 likes this.
  4. VadersLaMent Chosen One

    Member Since:
    Apr 3, 2002
    star 9
    Gates could set aside a billion of his 60 billion dollars towards the genetic research needed to cure STD's.
  5. Diggy Force Ghost

    Member Since:
    Feb 27, 2013
    star 4
    He's such a cheap bastard.
  6. VadersLaMent Chosen One

    Member Since:
    Apr 3, 2002
    star 9
    Just basic thinking, with what may be sillyness on my part. But still, let's say you had 50 billion and stuck it in a basic account and got 5% interest. That's 2.5 billion a year. I don't know that you can do that. How many account would one have to be insured for that much?
  7. jp-30 Manager Emeritus

    Member Since:
    Dec 14, 2000
    star 9
    :confused:
  8. VadersLaMent Chosen One

    Member Since:
    Apr 3, 2002
    star 9
    No really. Look at it this way. If you went treasure diving and found a 10 billion dollar sunken treasure. How do you secure it and get interest? Most stock brokerages insure in terms of tens of millions. Do you really need dozens of accounts to secure that much cash? Are you forced into stocks? How to you get the most basic/secure interest on billions?
  9. Jabbadabbado Manager Emeritus

    Member Since:
    Mar 19, 1999
    star 7
    Yes, you're forced into stocks. Start your own private equity firm and accumulate businesses.
    Last edited by Jabbadabbado, Mar 25, 2013
  10. Diggy Force Ghost

    Member Since:
    Feb 27, 2013
    star 4
    Are you wildy off topic or does this still count as a discussion about protection?
    Last edited by Diggy, Mar 25, 2013
  11. VadersLaMent Chosen One

    Member Since:
    Apr 3, 2002
    star 9
    It does, as an offshoot, because I am in the dark as to securing large sums of money and why this person is offering 100K when he could offer much more.
  12. anakinfansince1983 Chosen One

    Member Since:
    Mar 4, 2011
    star 7
    I was going to say that only on the YJCC can we go from a discussion about condoms to a discussion about investing money in two pages of thread.
  13. I Are The Internets Chosen One

    Member Since:
    Nov 20, 2012
    star 7
    I know! How about a condom that shoots out money at random moments!
  14. Jabbadabbado Manager Emeritus

    Member Since:
    Mar 19, 1999
    star 7
    I wish I could pleasure myself to cashgasm. I would be a wealthy man.
    anakinfansince1983 likes this.
  15. anakinfansince1983 Chosen One

    Member Since:
    Mar 4, 2011
    star 7
    And the woman gets to keep it if she comes first.
  16. I Are The Internets Chosen One

    Member Since:
    Nov 20, 2012
    star 7
    If I were a rich man dabba deeba dabba debba dabbo doo.
  17. Jabbadabbado Manager Emeritus

    Member Since:
    Mar 19, 1999
    star 7
    It's not condoms that need improving, it's people. We need to genetically engineer men so that they can produce different varieties of ejaculate at will. For example, if I needed to clean my car - I could cycle from prewash to soap to rinse to wax and save myself an expensive trip to the car wash.
    Last edited by Jabbadabbado, Mar 25, 2013
  18. Diggy Force Ghost

    Member Since:
    Feb 27, 2013
    star 4
    It would take a while to fill a bucket.
  19. Jabbadabbado Manager Emeritus

    Member Since:
    Mar 19, 1999
    star 7
    It would take away a lot of this unfortunate stigma against masturbating in public if we could use it to perform useful tasks, like fertilizing a lawn or painting the garage. Imagine how much more productive men would become if we could attach the pleasure receptors of the brain directly to power tools.
  20. Darth Guy Chosen One

    Member Since:
    Aug 16, 2002
    star 10
    That's exactly what he's asking for, actually.
  21. Jabbadabbado Manager Emeritus

    Member Since:
    Mar 19, 1999
    star 7
    It will be completely indestructible, yet breathe like Egyptian cotton.
  22. VadersLaMent Chosen One

    Member Since:
    Apr 3, 2002
    star 9
  23. CloneUncleOwen Force Ghost

    Member Since:
    Jul 30, 2009
    star 4

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  24. Darth Guy Chosen One

    Member Since:
    Aug 16, 2002
    star 10
    Anyway, my idea is to add "magnum" or "XL" to every condom name. It won't do anything for physical pleasure, but it will be pleasing to the ego.
  25. VadersLaMent Chosen One

    Member Since:
    Apr 3, 2002
    star 9
    [IMG]

    ^One of the faux marketing campaigns of all time that was very successful. "Regular" condoms are blown up like a balloon in testing. Any of them fit just about anyone. Notice there is no "small" version.