Saga In the Shadow of the Chosen: Episodes I-III (Obi-Wan, Anakin, TPM/post TPM) - - End of III, March 2!

I didn?t expect Sala to be so vicious. Neither did Obi-Wan, he started with a bit too much confidence and underestimated her. Jedis can?t see everything. It just dawned on me writing this post who she?s related too. Looks like I underestimated her too.

That was fast and furious. It?s more reaction only from me. I?m at a loss for words, visually wonderful to read... I?ll throw in an major for Obi-Wan. When I thought she could not get worse she did! He did get a few hits in on her.

His last strength being to get his saber was classic. Talk about hair-raising! Agrees, Bond action is good description.

Was this anything like pulling the ears off a Gundark? (watching too much OT this week)

 

What is it with you two? "Coincide", indeed! Between the two of you I shall be queasy for at least a week! My poor, darling Obi-Wan! If I wasn't so nauseated, I'd be indignant!

Oh, man! That Kala -- insulting his masculinity! That ***** -- I hope Obi broke her leg! Better yet -- I hope there's nothing but DNA left (or whatever passes for DNA in GFFA)!

Honestly, the two of you get me so worked up! Wait, wait for it...yup, here it comes! You two have me officially in a tizzy!

Can't wait to see what you've got up your sleeve...

 

<Han>It's not my fault!</Han>

Actually, I don't know whether to feel flattered or . . . guilty. I'm corrupting the young! I'd claim I was going to hell, but writing a fanfic novel is already the most hellish thing possible, so I guess technically I'm *staying* in hell.

You can check out any time you like, but you can never leave . . .

It wouldn?t do to slice up haphazard passers-by.

Quite so. Dismembering bystanders is terribly unsporting.


The blue light of the blade was the only illumination in the dingy room, save for the faint neon glow of street signs filtering in through the broken window.

I like that--nice fusion of Noir and the GFFA, done solely with the light. Again, most writers just don't do enough with lighting effects.

Did I mention that when I was in high school, I shut myself in my aunt's furnace room with various types of lighting sources, and wrote down what they looked like? It was the beeswax candle with the loong, untrimmed wick that could have killed me. Interesting lighting result though--these long "flags" of flame spring up and kind of "flap" regularly as the melting wax almost puts it out. It creates a kind of pulsing effect--like a strobe at a pre-Industrial rave. (Yet what's a rave without the Industrial music? And what does pre-Industrial music sound like, people screaming and banging on jacquard looms?)

Fortunately, there were no angry tweakers occupying the space at the moment.

Another nice GFFA slang term. Good slang is really difficult to come up with, but it can make or break a gritty non-earth-based scene.

?All right, now you?ve had your go at escaping,? Obi-Wan said in a low, commanding tone. ?It?s time you surrendered yourself before you get hurt.?

I can *so* hear Sean Connery saying that. Are you sure he's not Obi-Wan's dad, too?

The Jedi barely had the time and presence of mind to turn his torso away from the liquid droplets flying towards him. But he couldn?t get out of the way completely; with a terrible hiss, the corrosive chemical splattered onto Obi-Wan?s back.

::shudders:: Brutal, but an elegantly effective way for a non-Jedi to take a Jedi down fast. Lightsabers don't block cups of acid. It also doesn't need a page and a half of explanation earlier in the story, the way my anti-midichlorian-drug does.

Obi-Wan swung his weapon arm in a wide arc in Kala?s direction, only to find that the blade had gone out. It was still switched to ?on?, but some of the acid had burned through the metal casing and shorted out the interior wiring.

Ooh . . . that's *bad.* Nice extension of the acid idea--believable and ugly.

He was only vaguely aware of the pressure of Kala?s body against his as she whispered tauntingly, ?Not so bold now, are we??

Ever see the movie version of "Watership Down?" This reminds me of, "Can you run? I think not."

Also, I have just decided that Gillian Anderson would play a spectacular Kala.

Thankfully, he had hedged his bets correctly, and the water began flushing out the wounds rather than causing the chemical to ignite.

Yes, yes . . . ignition would be bad.

Obi-Wan?s free right hand blocked it only an instant short of landing a highly painful and unscrupulous blow.

Nice dodge around a potentially non-family-friendly topic, and suitably civilized for Obi-Wan.

His eyes widened in indignation, and his notions of chivalry immediately snapped.

I can see how that could happen in this situation.

If he was going to bleed and suffocate, at least he wasn?t going to forget his lightsabre.

That's right, dammit. No need to add insult to injury.

A few baffled and curious onlookers standing on the pedway bravely jogged in his direction, snatching him up by either arm and dragging him out of the way as the vacant building exploded.

Yaaay . . . something exploded! Oh, and some good Samaritans saved Obi-Wan. It's good to see that not *everyone* on Corusc

 

altaira
he started with a bit too much confidence and underestimated her

Definitely. He was going into it thinking he was absolutely going to cream her. His image of her was her as a stupid blonde. It never occurred to him that she might not be willing to fight him without some skills.

It just dawned on me writing this post who she?s related too. Looks like I underestimated her too.

Mmm, well, there?s quite a bit to be explained yet. Hopefully everything will be clear in the end. At least to the readers. Obi-Wan is hopelessly clueless

I?m glad you liked the action. I just re-read the chapter and felt like there were a lot of rough spots that I need to edit. Whoops.

watching too much OT this week

Not possible.


Liza
Between the two of you I shall be queasy for at least a week! My poor, darling Obi-Wan! If I wasn't so nauseated, I'd be indignant!

Hey, she?s done far worse than me. And you know, it?s not really *our* faults that Obi-Wan is such a pain magnet. I mean, there?s a whole section of AotC that has to be at least 4 days long where I?m pretty sure he never eats or sleeps

That Kala -- insulting his masculinity! That *****

An adequate description, I think. She knows he thinks nothing of her fighting abilities at first, so she gets quite a kick out of proving herself. Kind of humiliating. To be fair, though, I don?t think anyone would be in a fighting condition were his back being eaten up by acid and smashed into a wall.

Except Mace of course. Mace drinks hot acid for breakfast.

Honestly, the two of you get me so worked up! Wait, wait for it...yup, here it comes! You two have me officially in a tizzy!

An *official* tizzy. Well, that?s quite something. Honestly, ophelia has me beating my brains out to see what happens next, so you?re not alone.



ophelia

I'm corrupting the young!

Nonsense. Just because I read a great deal of a manual by a former Marine entitled Kill or Get Killed in research for this chapter doesn?t mean I?m corrupted. I kind of feel enlightened. Now I know a lot of ways to murder people with your bare hands!*

*but it?s not cold blooded murder if they shoot first.

Quite so. Dismembering bystanders is terribly unsporting.

And think of how his insurance premiums would have gone up. Force knows how much the Jedi Insurance Agents are already charging him for Anakin?s collateral coverage

I like that--nice fusion of Noir and the GFFA, done solely with the light.

Merci. Like I said, theatre techie. I just really like lights.

Did I mention that when I was in high school, I shut myself in my aunt's furnace room with various types of lighting sources, and wrote down what they looked like?

No, you failed to mention your pyromania before now That?s interesting, though. That?s the kind of thing I?d do if I really wanted to use one of those lights as a source. I have this habit of always researching everything. I don?t like to just BS. Plus, it would give me an excuse to play with fire. When I was younger, I used to spray hairspray on my hand, turn off the lights, and light my hand on fire

Fortunately, there were no angry tweakers occupying the space at the moment.

Another nice GFFA slang term. Good slang is really difficult to come up with, but it can make or break a gritty non-earth-based scene.

I?m glad you liked it, and I wish I could take credit for it, but actually, it *is* an earth slang. It?s just not one a lot of people know. It?s a slang for meth addicts, who tend to twitch a lot. But I decided that, since it?s not one a lot of people know, it would sufficiently work as a GFFA slang for druggies in general?I can?t believe I actually learned something in health class! This made it worth it. This, and the fact that I did a presentation on heroin and used pictures from Trainspotting.

?All right, now you?ve had your go at escaping,? Obi-Wan said in a low, commanding tone. ?It?s

 

All right, I was writing this section but obligations pulled me away before I could quite finish. As I have a plant biology test to study for, I decided just to post the first 2,000 words since it was getting long

So this is whatever chapter this is, part 1 I should hopefully finish up the other part tomorrow, but I might make you wait a few days (mostly so I don't have to write since I'll be gone over the weekend )

Also *pathetic snare drum roll*, with this post, the word count of SotC has officially reached...

[image=http://www.zalibethe.com/jedicouncil/images/alertepicobi.jpg]

The 100,000th word, boringly, was 'of'. However, the 99,999th word was 'duration'. That's quite fitting. We're all in for it. No excuses.

Thanks to Arin_Atona for the button and the wonderful epic support group for their shared insanity!


*****

Not a sound. No light to reflect in his eyes. The air was tasteless and still as a tomb. His nerves were numbed to uselessness. There was nothing but the Void. It always returned to him. Every time he reached the sub-conscious, he was back here. His very soul communed with the Force, listening, watching, feeling for it. It was different for everyone, he knew, but this was his. Ageless, faceless, he floated in an empty state of anticipation.

It was coming. He couldn?t remember what it was, though he knew he?d experienced it before. On some level, he was aware of this place that could be found only in the recesses of the mind, in the stillness of the abyss. Here he was, and all else was gone except for the Force. It drew him closer and closer, and he wondered what its message for him was. A vision? A purpose? A reflection of fault? He could guess, but only guess.

And then it happened. As it had many times before, though he had forgotten, the Force spoke. In a voice that was at once painful and soft, commanding and pleading, a high clear bell and a low rumble, it whispered and shouted not to the man but to the soul it knew intimately.

He listened. It said-

The icy stab shot through Obi-Wan, from his forehead down through the rest of his body. His rush into awareness obliterated his subconscious; it faded quickly back into the spirit. Obi-Wan?s eyes snapped open. Still in a surreal, hazy state of mind, he could not register his surrounding fully. All he saw was Chancellor Palpatine leaning over him, staring out through impassive eyes, his hand on the Jedi?s forehead.

Obi-Wan started at the unexpected sight, jerking his head back reflexively. Unfortunately, there was nothing beneath it but the gritty, wet surface of the pedway. The scratching feeling on the back of his neck opened up a flood of sensory images. The surrounding alleyway came back, the cold dampness of the air returned, and with it, the pain. Obi-Wan didn?t have time to make sense of Palpatine?s inexplicable presence. He barely had time to stop himself from screaming. The Chancellor disappeared out of view as a man dressed in the light yellow garb of a state medic moved to crouch down over the Jedi.

The medic might have said something, but to Obi-Wan the man was something of a blur. The Jedi?s attention was turned to blocking what pain he could with the aide of the Force. It came out as something like a silent prayer for help rather than a self-driven effort, but sometimes that was all one could do. It worked, though, to the extent that his shock faded and the paralysing pain he?d been feeling in his whole body was now confined only to the areas that were actually wounded.

Unfortunately, however, Obi-Wan was still lying with his scorched back on the ground. Before further attempts at trivial things like blocking pain or breathing properly, he had to get his body weight off his back, and quickly. The initial reaction of rolling to his left side proved a bad idea; the inflamed ligaments of his left shoulder had apparently swollen and stiffened rather painfully. Obi-Wan hissed quietly through his teeth, half in frustration and half from the throbbing pain that pulsed its

 

Hehehe that was great! Palps being on the scene hehehe how ironic?

Loved the layout of this chapter! Great job!! All for PR oh yeah

Congrads on making it over the looooong word count post!

 

Awww, Anakin came to make sure Obi-wan was all right!

Palpatine on the scene, huh? Seems fishy to me. (Plus, we all know. Obi-Wan doesn't. He he!)

Love the bit between Obi-Wan and the guys who saved him--that was cool. Too bad OW's so dazed and hurt that he didn't reply as much as he probably would have, knowing OW.

Unkillability, huh? I like the word--I like James Bond and Indy as well, so this is all good.

Great post. Congrats on the word count.

 

Any time Palpatine shows up I get suspicious. But that's just me, I'm the suspicious type!

So glad to see an update!

 

"Pain magnet", indeed!

He listened. It said-

WAKE THE HELL UP!!!!! Loved, loved, LOVED this description -- like a "soothing" slap in the face! Wonderful!


All he saw was Chancellor Palpatine leaning over him, staring out through impassive eyes, his hand on the Jedi?s forehead.

And what a lovely sight that must have been! Certainly most unexpected on my part.

Obi-Wan started at the unexpected sight, jerking his head back reflexively.

Et tu, Obi-Wan?

A sharp twinge radiated from Obi-Wan?s left upper back as the Chancellor?s fingers accidentally dug into one of his blistering burns.

The man?s thin lips twitched in concern. ?Do you feel nauseous at all??

<Lisa raises hand> Yes, thanks for asking. Actually, I kind of smiled when I saw this. My high school English teacher (whom I admired and adored) used to hate that word as in: "The word 'nauseous' makes me nauseated." Ohmigawd! She used to torture people who used that word! So thanks for a very fond memory. Crazy, I know.

Detained, the Chancellor put on a smile and paused to talk with them for PR?s sake.

Yeah, bay-bee, yeah! We're all about the great spin! I absolutely *lurve* this!

Just as he was gently loading his patient up the short ramp, a young voice desperately called out, ?Master!?

Could it be?!!?!

Though growing increasingly tired and fairly certain of slipping back into unconsciousness at any moment, Obi-Wan could not help but smile in relief as he saw his padawan sprinting towards him from the garage now bustling with medics and authorities. So, the boy truly hadn't crashed his ship into anything. ?Anakin,? Obi-Wan said with a slow nod.

Awwwww, this is so great! What I wouldn't have given to see something like this in the PT! I prolly wouldn't despise Ani as much as I despise him now...


To be continued...

Damn straight, little girl! Ha! Forget about school, it only gets you into trouble!

BTW, a great big mazel tov on your word count! All except for the "nauseous", of course! No, wait! I take that back! It reminded me of something wonderful so it's alllllll good!

 

Thank goodness I read those last two chapters one right after the other because that was an evil cliffhanger you left us on lady!

All he saw was Chancellor Palpatine leaning over him, staring out through impassive eyes, his hand on the Jedi?s forehead.
Oh my, that alone would cause me to want to go back to being unconscious. That's probably the last thing he was expecting to see.

And Kala, sneaky woman that one. She's still out there so Obi-Wan still has that to worry about, poor guy.

P-F

 

As always, you give me more stuff to ponder sj. I loved everything you had going on in this chapter. The "jester" thing was quite funny. This particular passage caught my interest though:

Suddenly, Chancellor Palpatine had re-entered Obi-Wan?s view, crouching once again along his left side. He made a rather clumsy attempt at aiding the Jedi. A sharp twinge radiated from Obi-Wan?s left upper back as the Chancellor?s fingers accidentally dug into one of his blistering burns. Obi-Wan grunted in reaction, prompting Palpatine to pull away.

Now sly old palpy, *never* does anything unintentionally I think. I've always felt that the odd byplay with him in the movies is supposed to convey this fact, not just the idea that he's sneaky and is engineering the Jedi's and the Republic's fall.

For these reasons that little bit really got me. What were you meaning here? Is he so vindictive and full of malice that he is deliberately harming Obi-Wan in anyway that he can, even in such a trivial manner as this, or am I just reading way too far into what you wrote? I'm highly curious to know what that was about.

 

Just a brief moment to comment before I have to go hang out with the Fam --

I *loved* the vision sequence. Those are so hard to write, since they rely almost entirely on image and rhythm. Obi-Wan's vision here is appropriately ominous--he's been badly injured and his "rescuer" is Palpy--but there's also awe and wonder there too, as befits a man close to uniting with what he considers the universe's highest power. The shift back to reality was great, too--almost a lightning-fast Matrix-to-Real-World transition, all done with rhythm. Very cool.

All he saw was Chancellor Palpatine leaning over him, staring out through impassive eyes, his hand on the Jedi?s forehead.

::Cue "Psycho" music:: Ahhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhh!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!

Meh--gotta go. More later.

 

Waking up to Palpatine would be a nightmare. Obi-Wan?s in bad shape, great job showing his pain, response and struggle to clear his head. Palps is a slimy one. He just reveals enough to cause caution but not enough to suspect. Yeah, right, like Palpy didn?t notice Obi-Wan?s hurt back.

I?d want the temple medics too. Poor Obi is whipped, can?t go forward or backward, only linger in ouch. At least he knows Anakin is safe. Good job with that painful post.

That was a rough mission.

 

Wow! So many replies I've been gone this weekend so I have some homework to attend to at the moment. My plan is to reply here and get the next chapter posted tonight. Got to get this pesky work out of the way first... whilst I watch playoffs

I'm so glad this is provoking such thought, though. This episode has been hard to write because the real emotional and character payoffs aren't until the end. So let's hope this all wraps up nicely, because I'm dying to write these last few bits

-sj loves kevin spacey

 

Let's try this again:

A sharp twinge radiated from Obi-Wan?s left upper back as the Chancellor?s fingers accidentally dug into one of his blistering burns. Obi-Wan grunted in reaction, prompting Palpatine to pull away.

Ooh, nasty! Palps can really stoop, can't he?

The state between ?rather serious? and ?all right? was, of course, most uncomfortable, though.

I hate feeling like that. That's like when you're feeling sick, but not too sick to go to work, so you have to go anyway. That sucks.

?Did Padawan Skywalker make it to you safely?? he asked the Chancellor.

?Yes, of course, Master Jedi. And with the rescued orphans, thank goodness. They?re in safe keeping now,? Palpatine assured him with a smile.

I'm glad Obi-Wan is concerned about Anakin. It's nice to see the soft spot of Mr. "I don't have a soft spot."

Also--nice smooth, seamless transition around all of the stuff you didn't want to get stuck describing.

Obi-Wan held out an expectant hand, and the Chancellor shot him an unreadable smile before returning the weapon.

This would be a "I could flay your entire skin off you with this in 2 seconds if I felt like it" smile?

?Not a problem, Jester. Not a problem at all,? the first man insisted with a smile that held admiration. Obi-Wan recognized the slang term for 'Jedi Master' as reflexive for the man rather than as an actual insult, as it had originated. It was probably simply the way he?d always heard Jedi Masters referred to.

I like that . . . Reminds me of the only part of the JA books that I liked--some villain or other persists in referring to Qui-Gon as "Jedi-Gon." Sounds like a "Not Sold In Stores!" Jedi repellant that they'd sell on TV.

Meanwhile, the medic continued to pull Obi-Wan?s sleigh towards the awaiting small yellow medical cruiser. Just as he was gently loading his patient up the short ramp, a young voice desperately called out, ?Master!?

Though growing increasingly tired and fairly certain of slipping back into unconsciousness at any moment, Obi-Wan could not help but smile in relief as he saw his padawan sprinting towards him from the garage now bustling with medics and authorities. So, the boy truly hadn't crashed his ship into anything. ?Anakin,? Obi-Wan said with a slow nod.

Aww . . . just like Timmy and Lassie, only . . . not quite.

I'm anxiously awaiting the bits you can't wait to get to, especially if they're better than this.

 

Kynstar
Palps being on the scene hehehe how ironic?[/i]

?how ironic?? indeed

Congrads on making it over the looooong word count post!

Thanks. It certainly has been quite a while, about 14 months now, but (un?)fortunately there?s still a lot to go.


Laine
Plus, we all know. Obi-Wan doesn't. He he!

It?s a beautiful irony of anything dealing with the Jedi and Palps in the PT era. Obi-Wan, unfortunately, is no exception to the rule of ignorance there I?m having way too much fun with it though

Too bad OW's so dazed and hurt that he didn't reply as much as he probably would have, knowing OW.

Yes, he would have liked to have been a bit more polite, I?m sure.

Unkillability, huh? I like the word--I like James Bond and Indy as well, so this is all good.

Well, since ophelia and I have now established the familial relationships between the three of them, it makes more sense.

Congrats on the word count.

Thanks for fueling my insanity


VaderLVR
Any time Palpatine shows up I get suspicious. But that's just me, I'm the suspicious type!

I don?t know, I think a lot of this is owed to the fantastic Ian Everything he does, says, appears to think, etc. is suspect. It?s so wonderful.

So glad to see an update!

Thanks, I?m glad to see you as well! I got behind on In the Service of the Order comments again. Shame on me!


Liza

He listened. It said-

WAKE THE HELL UP!!!!!

Haha? well, no, not quite It does ?say? something, but if Obi-Wan doesn?t get to know right now then *you* don?t get to. Darn that Palpy for interrupting

Loved, loved, LOVED this description -- like a "soothing" slap in the face! Wonderful!

Well, it is something along the lines of the idea of the Force as an often firm-handed parent. I can say it was urging him not to just curl up and die, in a sense, though.

And what a lovely sight that must have been! Certainly most unexpected on my part.

I was hoping Palps?s appearance here with his hand on Obi-Wan?s forehead would feel like as much of a shock to the readers as it?s supposed to be to Obi-Wan

My high school English teacher (whom I admired and adored) used to hate that word as in: "The word 'nauseous' makes me nauseated." Ohmigawd! She used to torture people who used that word! So thanks for a very fond memory. Crazy, I know.

No, it?s encouraging! You see, ophelia- people really *do* remember their insane high school English teachers. So there?s hope for you yet

We're all about the great spin! I absolutely *lurve* this!

I really agree with Obi-Wan?s view of politicians on the whole, distrusting them naturally and all. I wanted to really play that up in all of its justified and unjustified stereotypical incidents. Well with Palps, he obviously *should* be suspicious of his incredible oilyness

Awwwww, this is so great! What I wouldn't have given to see something like this in the PT! I prolly wouldn't despise Ani as much as I despise him now...

Well I?m doing my best to remedy the unfortunate gaps there. I don?t think Anakin was ever intended to be despised as a kid. We all would have liked him more if we?d got to see how adorably headache-inducing he probably was to Obi-Wan as a child

BTW, a great big mazel tov on your word count!

Thank you very much And I?m glad I could bring up a nice memory of high school for you. Those are probably few and far between, as high school is mostly evil



Leida
Thank goodness I read those last two chapters one right after the other because that was an evil cliffhanger you left us on lady!

Shucks! Had I realized you hadn?t had sufficient time to be tortured, I would have waited on the update and just spent the time posting randomly in the WH instead. Much more productive than writing

Oh my, that alone would cause me to want to go back to being unconscious. That's probably t

 

I shouldn?t hype things up, not even to myself. Judging by this chapter and the things I was attempting to do, the conclusion is probably going to fall flat on its face and feel completely unbelievable and/or confusing.

Don't be too hard on yourself. Just because we didn't get it doesn't mean you didn't do it right.

Thanks for everyone?s honest responses, though. I?m glad you?re enjoying it but I?m sorry if it ends up being a letdown ultimately.

Not possible, sweetness. You couldn't let me down even if you sent me to hell in a handbasket.

Really, thanks for your encouragement and praise, though, however misplaced I may believe it to be.

You are a sad, strange little man. I really hope that you don't think our praise is misplaced. You are an immensely talented and entertaining writer and I can't tell you how much I have enjoyed reading your stories. After spending too much time on the 3SA board and having to swallow the swill from so many Darthikin apologists and Obi-Wan finger-pointers, it is a genuine pleasure to come over here and read about Obi-Wan from someone who seems to inhabit his personal space.

 

Thanks for the encouragement, Liza. I do appreciate it, it's just that I am also aware that I'm not perfect and I want to try to improve my writing. Right now I'm just making some objective observations. I love the story on the whole, but I've definitely made some mistakes.

Whatever that last chapter/post thing was, part deux:

*****

?I was looking for you, Master,? the boy said, sounding relieved. ?I got our cloaks from the roof. Here?s yours.? He looked around for a place to set it, but there wasn?t much room in the cramped ship, so he had to settle for placing it on the floor at Obi-Wan?s feet. It took the boy?s frantic brain a moment to realise there was a reason he?d found Obi-Wan in a medical ship. ?Are you okay?? he asked.

It was, under the circumstances, a daft question. But Obi-Wan, noting the boy?s honest concern, managed to reply without a hint of wryness, ?I?ll be all right, padawan.?

?Master Kenobi,? a scaled medic of unidentifiable planetary origin interrupted. ?We?ll need to lock you in a restraining field since we can?t secure you lying down.?

?That?s fine,? Obi-Wan conceded. It was not that he liked the idea, but he saw there was no other option. He had requested to be taken to the Temple, after all. The alien gently leaned him back a little into the path of a blue restraining ray. His limbs immediately went immobile, though he could still speak and could feel the pain in his back with each heartbeat. Obi-Wan could ignore his wounds, but he could not heal them, and they weren?t going away on their own.

Anakin looked concerned about his Master?s state on a whole, but Obi-Wan could also sense that the boy was uneasy for other reasons. He had fallen quiet and distracted as the medic worked, applying a few more sedative patches to Obi-Wan?s neck. Anakin?s eyes drifted away to the building across the blocked-off street, where medics were bustling to treat the Nikto slavers. Those who were still treatable, anyway.

Obi-Wan reminded himself that Anakin was not yet used to all of this. His realisation was particularly sharpened by the memory of Anakin?s shocked state after killing the human slaver. They hadn?t had any time to talk about it before, and now he wasn?t quite sure he was in a state to. His mind kept pulsing in and out of complete clarity, and he felt sure he wasn?t going to be at all coherent for much longer.

Nevertheless, Obi-Wan made an attempt. ?Anakin,? he said, able only to turn his eyes towards the boy as his neck was locked in place. ?Is there something bothering you?? he thought he?d give the boy a chance to approach the subject on his own terms.

Anakin looked down and shook his head. ?I really don?t want to talk about it, Master,? he mumbled. It was clear he knew what Obi-Wan was getting at. His Force signature was projecting his internal conflict.

?Padawan, it?s only natural to feel confused at a time like this. But we should talk.? Here Obi-Wan drifted out for a moment as the darkness edged back into his vision. He blinked it away, and continued, ?Remember, your motivations?? he blinked again, ?the reasons you do things are important. Jedi musn?t?? This time he closed his eyes and took a few deep breaths to center himself.

Anakin was now watching his master, but only half listening. He kept staring at Obi-Wan?s blistering back, aware that he could vaguely feel his master?s pain through their Force bond as well. It was distracting, but he was still willing to listen. But Obi-Wan said nothing more. For a moment, the boy waited for the young man to speak, but he quickly realised his Master had fallen unconscious. ?Hey,? he addressed the alien medic.

?I know,? he replied, checking the readouts from the sensors embedded in the restraining beam. ?We need to get him out of here.?

?Ok,? Anakin replied with a nod. He was not about to disagree that his Master needed aid soon. The Jedi healers would be able to help him.

?You?ve got to get out of here,? the medic continued. ?There?s not enough room once the doors are closed.

?But I

 

Bad Palpatine! If this was a setup just so he could get a chance at Anakin--ooh, that makes me mad.

Poor Anakin! Too bad Obi-wan slipped into unconsciousness. Nice plot device, btw.

Can't wait for the next postie!

 

Awwww how sweet! Well *snrk* most wouldn't think so, but I thought so hehehe Ain't Palps and Anakin so cute together?

Poor Obi.. passing out before he could finish stating what he was trying to to Anakin. Poor Anakin he couldn't ride with his Master to the Temple.

Great job! Palps telling Anakin that Jedi do feel anger what a reminder hehehehe

Hehehe I soooooooo love Palps in this stage of his life hehehe

 

That was terrible! Not the post, which was the opposite of terrible (splediferous, in case you're wondering) but palpatine was terrible! He's such a crafty old windbag! I love how you had him insinuate his own twisted values into jedi philosophies in order to taint anakin.

I've always felt like it wasn't entirely anakin's fault he fell because he had to deal with scenes like you just described for most of his apprenticeship. With palpatine steadily emptying his poison into your mind, how long can anyone stand, especially when they're started upon very young.

Very Good

 

Laine
If this was a setup just so he could get a chance at Anakin--ooh, that makes me mad.

Mmm, just wait

Too bad Obi-wan slipped into unconsciousness. Nice plot device, btw.

Thanks Yeah, since my focus in on characters, I have the darndest time sometimes figuring out how to torture, or er, ?stretch them? properly and all to reveal parts of their personalities. I was quite proud of myself for concocting this little chat.


Kynstar
Ain't Palps and Anakin so cute together?

Sure, if you have a thing for wearing black, pale skin, wrinkles, and general evilness.

Poor Obi.. passing out before he could finish stating what he was trying to to Anakin.

He?s going to get a chance eventually, but well, he?s missed first crack that?s for sure.

I soooooooo love Palps in this stage of his life

I love Palps always. He?s so much fun to write. In fics, we don?t often get a chance to see any earlier influence he may have had on Anakin. I think AotC made it clear that they knew each other and had talked quite a bit, though. So I?m having fun showing that


Darth_Pixel
Not the post, which was the opposite of terrible (splediferous, in case you're wondering)

Thanks I admit I?m kind of a perfectionist, but still, everything really *can* be improved. I guess it works for this draft anyway though.

but palpatine was terrible! He's such a crafty old windbag!

Oh indeed he is.

I love how you had him insinuate his own twisted values into jedi philosophies in order to taint anakin.

He can?t just fly in the face of what Anakin has been taught and come to believe. It?s much better to slowly twist what?s already there. It requires great patience, though. Remember this in case you ever decide to slowly corrupt and children or anything.

With palpatine steadily emptying his poison into your mind, how long can anyone stand, especially when they're started upon very young.

It would take a very discerning person. It might also require having someone to counter that influence. Obi-Wan has the right idea but the wrong methods. This combined with Anakin?s life circumstances does indeed make it very tough for him. However, in the end, as GL says, he says yes. Luke says no, which is why he gets to be the inarguable hero And Obi-Wan, well, he?s? something.

-sj loves kevin spacey

 

Another superb post, sj.

Although it breaks my heart, I love how you had Palpidious insinuate himself into Anakin's life, especially at such a critical juncture. As you said, Obi-Wan did not get "first crack" with Anakin and I feel that this will have both an immediate and future negative impact on their relationship.

So sad, yet so clever! Well done.

 

Liza
Another superb post, sj.

Thanks. I still wish I had more time to edit these things and revise more, but I suppose that's what ''later'' is for

I love how you had Palpidious insinuate himself into Anakin's life, especially at such a critical juncture.

I'm glad you do. Really, it's one of the unfortunate things about the gap between TPM and AOTC. We miss so much conniving

I feel that this will have both an immediate and future negative impact on their relationship.

Since I'm obviously not going to be showing mission upon mission or instance upon instance, I wanted to try to pack into this one the basic jist of Palpatine's influence on Anakin in these first few years coming up. Each of these episodes is designed to kind of show one aspect of the Obi-Wan/Anakin relationship so far. Hopefully all together we'll get a kind of picture of most of the important aspects as well as an idea of how things have changed over the years... ideally, anyway


So sad, yet so clever!

Well, inspired clever really. I chalk it up to having the same birthday as Ian McDiarmid

-sj loves kevin spacey

 

I agree with everyone else, sj. This just gets better and better. I can't wait for more updates. I'm sorry I don't get to post as much as I'd like and comment on your wonderful story.

And having Palpatine there when he woke up, That was not what I was expecting. I loved that twist. It was great showing Anakin and Palpatine interacting. Well, great in a horrible way. I'm sure he took every available opportunity to get his claws into Anakin. The way you go about showing it is just perfect.

And on a side note, just from reading the posts between you and ophelia I had to go check her story out. The posts between you two are so entertaining. So now I have two great stories to keep up with. Of course I love reading the replies of everyone in this story, can't help but love Obi fans!!