Before In the Shadows, Darkness lies. (Updated 5/4/03)

Discussion in 'Fan Fiction- Before, Saga, and Beyond' started by Kit', Mar 15, 2003.

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  1. Kit' Manager Emeritus

    Member Since:
    Oct 30, 1999
    star 5
    Two black eyes gleamed in the roaring fire light. His eyes widening and hands fluttering, the story teller wove his enchantment through the awe-struck audience. They sad quietly still as the words poured from his mouth and whisked their minds away to the softer, calmer time before theirs.

    So enchanted were they, that they didn?t hear the distant low hum and whine of powerful engines. Nor did they notice the sudden silence and hush that fell over the normal night-time chirping of small insects and the hurried huffing noise of the little mammals that hunted them. The stories of their gods and ancestors had enchanted them. And the rhythmic rise and fall of the storyteller?s voice and hands had simply woven that enchantment deeper.

    It was the storyteller who noticed first. His hands stopped ridged in mid-flutter and his nostrils flared. His words dribbled away into the wind that was suddenly roaring across the vast savanna. With the last of his words the crowd came alive. Blinking their dark eyes in confusion at the abrupt ending of the story and the sudden awareness that something was definitely wrong. In the midst of the crowd a woman turned, her dark coils of hair twisting around her face. Her eyes widened in despair and fear as somewhere else someone gave a half-startled scream of panic. In her confusion the young dark-skinned women tried to both scramble to her feet and untangle herself from the young baby that she had been nursing during the story. The baby came awake with a jerk and began to scream its little mouth opened wide as it sensed the fear of the tribe ripple through it.
    ?Harrakka? the cry stampeded through the herd of terrified villagers. As they watched the low heavy lumbering ship that had been the source of all the fear slowly opened large flap-like hatches and scores of smaller faster ships shot out like insects. The top of the long savanna grass bent low and the dust trembled as these little ships streamed towards them. Women and children began to scrambled through the long, sharp grass in a desperate and hopeless attempt to flee.

    Long brown legs flashed through the fire light as many people leapt the roaring campfire in an attempt to get away from the slave ship. Long thin spot lights fell from the tiny black insect-like ships. They fastened onto one of the running tribesmen, tracking them as they fled. Small nets fell from the ships as they passed over the top of the running figures. Most of the tribesmen stood no chance and clutched and screamed as they were hoisted aloft in their rope prisons. Many of the ships carried several of this bundles below them and the terrified tribesmen knotted fingers with their kin as they were carried aloft.

    Then, as swiftly as it had come the raiders left and the village fell unnaturally silent. Slowly the insects began to chirp again and small rodents could be seen running quickly through the undergrowth. In one of the thickest grass bushes, the young woman cuddled her child and whimpered and shook in fear. As she stared wild-eyed and terrified into the darkness the little plump baby began to wail again.

    *
  2. Kit' Manager Emeritus

    Member Since:
    Oct 30, 1999
    star 5
    Hey Everyone :)

    After a long drought that happened the end of the black sheep triology, I've decided to start another story.

    The posting may be sporadic due to uni, but I'll try and make it as regular as possible.

    Kithera
  3. PaddyJuan Force Ghost

    Member Since:
    Nov 15, 2002
    star 4
    eeek! an intriguing beginning. can't wait for more.
  4. katha Force Ghost

    Member Since:
    Jan 30, 2002
    star 2
    Great start Kit' looking foward to more.. and bookmarking this one as soon as I'm on my own computer :)

    Keep it up
  5. Calamity Jinn Jedi Master

    Member Since:
    May 23, 2000
    star 4

    Hooray! A new Kit story! :D

    I can't wait to find out what's happened to everyone. A great start... it certainly captures your interest.

    Another reader here for you Kit! :)
  6. SHADOW13 Jedi Knight

    Member Since:
    Jan 20, 2003
    star 1
    I like this :D Mysterious beginning :confused:
  7. Monica_Skywalker Jedi Master

    Member Since:
    Jul 10, 2002
    star 4
    Wow, what a wonderful start! :D

    I can't wait to read more! :)
  8. Healer_Leona Manager Emeritus

    Member Since:
    Jul 7, 2000
    star 9
    Well, I know this split of the boards can only be a good thing if it's brought bunnies back to you and the urge to post again Kit!!

    Quite like the storyteller in your thread, you're weaving an intriguing spell over your audience. A suspenseful start that will certainly bring me back for more.

    Post often, post soon!
  9. Jemmiah Jedi Grand Master

    Member Since:
    Mar 5, 2000
    star 5
    Kit, it's so wonderful that you are writing something! :) :) :) What a fabulous begining - and a great way to kickstart the new boards into life! But who is the woman with the baby???

    You've left me wanting more! :D

    -Jem
  10. Sara_Kenobi Force Ghost

    Member Since:
    Sep 21, 2000
    star 7
    This looks really good Kit. :)
  11. Jane Jinn Jedi Grand Master

    Member Since:
    Jan 12, 2000
    star 5
    Quite an intriguing beginning, Kit', which leaves the reader with lots of questions. I'll be interested in seeing where you're taking this.
  12. mouse2 Jedi Master

    Member Since:
    Oct 29, 1999
    star 4
    COOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOLLLLLLLLLLL!!! ;)

    Kit's posting a new story! Quite an intense and mysterious start! Can't wait for more! :)
  13. Agent_Jaid Jedi Grand Master

    Member Since:
    Feb 21, 2003
    star 5
    *eyes wide in shock*

    That's it?.....................
  14. Just_Jill Jedi Knight

    Member Since:
    Jul 17, 2002
    star 3
    Interesting beginning. Can't wait to see how it goes.

    Just Jill
  15. Kit' Manager Emeritus

    Member Since:
    Oct 30, 1999
    star 5
    Hey Everyone..... you'll have to excuse the non-postiness today. I've picked up the flu from a party the other night and now I feel awful. I promise to try and get time to post another bit up tomorrow for you all.

    I have to say though that all the responses and comments are making the sniffles and everything else feel much better.

    Hugs :)

    Kithera
  16. Monica_Skywalker Jedi Master

    Member Since:
    Jul 10, 2002
    star 4
    I hope you get feeling better soon! :)
  17. Mistress_Renata Manager Emeritus

    Member Since:
    Sep 9, 2000
    star 4
    Ooo...flu and computers don't mix. You might hit the wrong key and delete your hard drive or something. Don't worry, we'll wait 'til you get better. [face_love]

    (Of course, she would have to get sick at a cliffhanger! ;) )
  18. Kit' Manager Emeritus

    Member Since:
    Oct 30, 1999
    star 5
    Forgive the delay and the shoddyness of the post.

    ****

    ?Tara!? The note of urgency of Davin?s voice echoed through the small corridors of the tiny spacecraft. Tara paused in quiet thought, her nimble fingers still braiding her long hair. She closed her green eyes briefly and sighed.

    ?Under *your* pile of clothing next to the bed.? She yelled back after a minute. Her concentration back on braiding and untangling her hair, she almost missed the muted sounds of thrown clothing as her Master dug through his scattered belongings.

    A thumping noise came from behind her in the corridor, sounding rather like a desperate bantha hopping on one leg. Tara turned slightly to see her venerable master clinging desperately to the wall with one hand while trying to force a boot onto his socked foot.

    ?You moved it.? He accused stomping his foot down hard onto the deck and pulling at the back of the boot at the same time.

    ?No Master. Your nasty re-entry moved everything.? Tara countered, "Don't blame me if you can't fly straight." Finishing with her plait she stood up and faced him her light green eyes almost level with his brown ones.
    "It was those damn birds." Davin made a huffing noise like his pride had been offended on some deep level and tossed her a bag of clothing. ?You?ll need this for the night,? he added, ?you can come back for everything else when we move on tomorrow.?

    Tara nodded and shut the ship off at the control panel and activated the security code. ?You hardly need that.? Davin said, ?We are in the middle of the Eracian savanna and its hardly likely that anyone is going to steal a space-craft let alone know how to pilot one.?

    ?It?s a habit, Master.? Tara replied dutifully adding a battered data pad to her bag of belongings. "It's on the same level par of unjedi like activity as your driving skills."

    With a flip of her plait the younger jedi raised her nose in the air and stalked off towards the exit. Her point made, and her master grinning ruefully behind her.

    The two Jedi stepped from the ship and into the broiling heat of the dusty savanna. The area was dotted with sharp, spiky grasses and the occasional small stunted bush. The dust rose shimmering into the horizon and the air was dry and thick.

    Davin strode away through the thick grass, not caring how it dragged and ripped at his robes. Tara followed him, her long legs managing to keep up with her Master?s stride despite their gangling and awkward appearance.

    Within minutes both were drenched with sweat and Tara?s mouth felt drier then the desert itself. They crested a small rise and then for the first time Tara saw the small village. Earthen huts rose sleepily out of the dry ground like small white and brown mushrooms. Their grass patched rooves a mottled hybrid of green and yellow against the otherwise colourless desert.

    ?Why couldn?t we have flown here?? Tara asked wiping sweat from her eyes.

    ?We?d have scared the Natassa.? Davin replied pointing with his fingers towards the distant crowd of four-legged beasts that were currently grazing amongst the huts. ?They shouldn?t be unpenned.? He said frowning at his own observation as he squinted into the harsh sunlight, ?And where are the herd boys??

    A worried look now gracing his usually smiling face, the stocky Jedi Master began to run down the hill towards the village. The Natassa looked around and lowed as he came towards them, Tara following close behind. Apart from the soft noises of the bovines there was no other sound. The village was deathly quiet.

    ?Watagi?? Davin called, ?Watagi? Hello?? His voice sounded flatly through the village but no answer came.

    Tara pushed one of the mud hut doors open and glanced inside. Clothes were neatly piled in a corner and the remains of a meal were going moldy in their pans.

    ?It?s empty, Master.? Tara called.

    ?This one too.? The Jedi Master replied pushing another door open, ?And this and oh mighty force.? The Jedi Master paused lost for words.

    ?What is it?? Tara asked worried
  19. Jane Jinn Jedi Grand Master

    Member Since:
    Jan 12, 2000
    star 5
    Glad you're feeling better! This is a nice introduction to Tara and Davin. Now, who's throwing spears at them, and where are the villagers?
  20. Agent_Jaid Jedi Grand Master

    Member Since:
    Feb 21, 2003
    star 5
  21. katha Force Ghost

    Member Since:
    Jan 30, 2002
    star 2
    wow..
    looking good Kit, keep it up :)
  22. Jemmiah Jedi Grand Master

    Member Since:
    Mar 5, 2000
    star 5
    Nothing wrong with that post, Kit! What a place to leave it, though! :) So, where did the spear come from??? Don't leave us hanging too long!

    (Hope you are feeling better, btw).
  23. mouse2 Jedi Master

    Member Since:
    Oct 29, 1999
    star 4
    Fabulous post Kit'!

    What a wonderful intoduction, but who is flinging spears??

    And I also hope you're feeling better! :)
  24. Kit' Manager Emeritus

    Member Since:
    Oct 30, 1999
    star 5
    Jane Thanks - it's taken about a week to get over this silly cold, but it is almost gone :)

    As for the villagers you're about to find out...sort of...

    Jaid Thanks :)

    Katha Thanks :) Where is my new story though? :p

    Jemm Thanks Jemm. It should all become clearer in the next post!

    Mouse Like I said to Jemm, it's all about to come clearer...

    I apologise for the irregular posting. I'm going to definitely try harder over the coming weeks to make it as regular as possible. Assignments and work asside that is :p

    Short post...

    Kithera
  25. Kit' Manager Emeritus

    Member Since:
    Oct 30, 1999
    star 5
    Tara made a run for the bush from which the spear had come calling her lightsabre to her hand as she did so. The green blade sprang to life menacingly bright even against the harsh glare of the sun.

    The bush rustled again and a lithe, long-legged figure sprang from the behind the bush. Chasing after her, Tara could see the girl had more then a good start, but the sun and the cracked dry ground were against the fleeing figure.

    Her ankle turned on a clod of grass and she fell yelling as she did so. Panting and out of breathe the young girl rolled onto her back and raised both hands in front of her palms out.

    ?Don?t hurt me! Please don?t hurt me!? She cried in Erani tears streaming from her eyes and down her dusty brown face.

    Reacting instinctively Tara reached her hand out to help the girl to her feet, but the young woman cringed and shied away as if the Jedi had been about to strike her. Puling her arm back, Tara went to step forward again, but strong fingers caught her shoulder. Davin stepped past her and knelt down by the girl, keeping his arms close to his side.

    ?My name is Davin Dor, we aren?t going to hurt you.? He said softly in Erani. The young woman?s opened her eyes and looked warily at the Jedi Master. She ducked her head, a wave of springy black and brown curls shielding her face momentarily.

    ?I?m Ramiii? She said softly in Erani. Davin reached out and took her hand and pressed the palm to the side of his face. After a moment he rocked back on his heels and stared up at Tara.

    ?This is Tara.? Davin said pointing up. Tara waved shyly, not knowing quite what to make of the situation.

    ?What happened to your village?? Davin asked gently.

    ?The Gods had their vengence.? Ramii whispered ducking her face so that I was hidden behind a sheath of spring-like curls. ?The came from the sky and devoured us.?
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