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Speculation In this thread, please fabricate "scoops" for Episode 7-9!

Discussion in 'Star Wars: New Films - No Spoilers Allowed' started by BigAl6ft6, Dec 15, 2012.

  1. I Are The Internets

    I Are The Internets Force Ghost star 8

    Registered:
    Nov 20, 2012
    Billy Dee Williams will be the only one returning.
     
  2. Darth Gumby

    Darth Gumby Jedi Youngling

    Registered:
    Mar 8, 2013
    Luke finally goes back to Tosche Station to pick up some power converters. But all he finds is an inappropriate hologram of Camie in the shower. Oh wait that already happened...
     
    DarthRelaxus and BigAl6ft6 like this.
  3. I Are The Internets

    I Are The Internets Force Ghost star 8

    Registered:
    Nov 20, 2012
    Luke goes to the Tosche Station but finds out that it has been turned into a pizza palace. He then loses the will to live.
     
    Ryus and furcifer like this.
  4. furcifer

    furcifer Jedi Master star 2

    Registered:
    Jun 30, 2004
    .
    The "first 10 minutes" of Episode VII will screen in select IMAX theaters in late 2014.

    (Coincidentally, that is around the same time when Christopher Nolan's Interstellar is reportedly scheduled to be released. One noted critic who doesn't like Interstellar will declare: "The ten minute preview of SW Episode VII is more fun and engaging than the entirety of Interstellar.")

    In January 2015, an additional 5 minutes of Episode VII will be released (initially as a series of five 1-minute mobisodes available exclusively on select mobile devices).
     
  5. furcifer

    furcifer Jedi Master star 2

    Registered:
    Jun 30, 2004
    ...operated by Pizza the Hutt from Spaceballs.
     
  6. DarthRelaxus

    DarthRelaxus Jedi Grand Master star 5

    Registered:
    Apr 23, 2007
    In an unexpected twist, David Prowse will play all the roles.
     
  7. I Are The Internets

    I Are The Internets Force Ghost star 8

    Registered:
    Nov 20, 2012
    Will Smith will play Lando, thus confirming the usage of time travel in the ST.
     
    BigAl6ft6 and lbr789 like this.
  8. Orochi Oni

    Orochi Oni Jedi Knight star 2

    Registered:
    Mar 8, 2013
    AW, HELL NAH!!!

    Tommy Lee Jones will play Lando, causing Billy Dee to go on a rampage through Hollywood, yelling: "Jones did it to me AGAIN!!!" at anyone who'll listen.

    Also, it will be revealed that Shmi knew all along who Anakin's father was, but the guy was so ugly she made up the virgin birth thing out of embarrassment.
     
    BigAl6ft6 likes this.
  9. BigAl6ft6

    BigAl6ft6 Force Ghost star 6

    Registered:
    Nov 12, 2012
    Hel-ow! Best scoop ever! I just got reports from Google that Camie googling just went way up!
     
  10. The_Coon

    The_Coon Jedi Youngling star 1

    Registered:
    Feb 11, 2013
    all the trekkies are wrong

    John Harrison is PALPATINES SON!!!!

    he got accidently blasted form the galaxy far far away into our own as part of a fialed expiremnt long ago to turn his skin back to normal after maces attack in episode III

    the film will end with a huge showdown between him and kirk in which we will fake death then his ship will explode creating a black hole which transports him back home where he will learn what has become of his fathers empire Cue Episode VII
     
  11. Sum-Wan

    Sum-Wan Jedi Master star 4

    Registered:
    Feb 16, 2013
    Sources not so close to Michael Arndt swore on their mother-in-law's lives that in Episode 7 there will be a new "most powerful Force user of all time" and that this character will achieve this feat by bio-engineering their midi-chlorians into the new fully-chlorians, with 2X the Force sensitiveness...
     
    Ryus, Darth Claire and DarthRelaxus like this.
  12. TK-77

    TK-77 Jedi Youngling

    Registered:
    Mar 9, 2013
    Sauces advise that Episode VII will be shown from a certain point of view.
     
  13. I Are The Internets

    I Are The Internets Force Ghost star 8

    Registered:
    Nov 20, 2012
    "The Big 3" actually is referring to Shatner, Stewart, and Nimoy. They're all going to return(?!) to SW.
     
    BigAl6ft6 likes this.
  14. Leias_Left_Bun

    Leias_Left_Bun Jedi Master star 4

    Registered:
    Feb 18, 2013
    The main characters will be Ben Skywalker and Jaina Solo, as Episode 7 will adhere very strictly to the EU. The opening crawl will take 45 minutes.

    Another leading character will be Jar-Jar's grandson, Zha-Zha Binks, who will be force-sensitive. He will reveal his power by making a Bodooka and proclaiming "Meesa berry good Jedi!"

    Lando's daughter will be played by Zoe Saldana, resulting in further confusion between the Star Wars and Star Trek universes.
     
  15. A Chorus of Disapproval

    A Chorus of Disapproval New Films Malleus Maleficarum star 8 Staff Member Manager

    Registered:
    Aug 19, 2003
  16. Darth Claire

    Darth Claire Force Ghost star 5

    Registered:
    Dec 21, 2012
    Episode 9 climax to include an army of invincible force ghosts who brutally slaughter over 100,000 of the enemy's army. Will include cameos from all the dead jedi. Scene is said to be like this


    At least its not a bunch of silly teddy bears killing a whole legion of Storm Troopers. ;)
     
    Sum-Wan likes this.
  17. T-R-

    T-R- Chosen One star 5

    Registered:
    Aug 13, 2003
    Lando's daughter, played by Rhianna, is married to Han's son, played by Shia
     
  18. furcifer

    furcifer Jedi Master star 2

    Registered:
    Jun 30, 2004
    Nobody will like the irritating mosquito-like sounds of the "new" lightsabers.
     
    DarthRelaxus likes this.
  19. Ryus

    Ryus Jedi Master star 4

    Registered:
    Feb 25, 2013
    An angry former LFL employee revealed to me that Mara Jade will be the mother of one of the new main character (it wasnt revealed to me she ever married Luke or not though) and she will appear late in the movie revealing the main character is Lukes child. Neither Luke or his son are surprised though, apperently Mara left him a few years after he was born, the minor twist here though being Mara had a daughter after she left.

    Though what caused this person to be disgruntled is apperently Mara left Luke after discovering the Emperor was her father. She finds this out from a vision from the force after discovering an old recording of Palpatine and was shocked to find out he has red hair too. In this vision she saw his plans for her as a possible replacement for Vader due to his lack of progress after becoming mostly cyborg and for Luke too should either Vader beat him or he remain on the light side. Though it wasnt fear of this that caused her to flee, it was her sensing a new Sith sharing her vision and she realizing he plans to turn one of them to the darkside due to there ancestory of two Sith Lords.

    At first Mara just planned to hide the kids and kill this sith lord, problem was she was never able to find him and out of concern of protecting her kids as best she knew how, so she remained in hiding from Darth Jar Jar and his apprentice Darth Wicket.
     
  20. BigAl6ft6

    BigAl6ft6 Force Ghost star 6

    Registered:
    Nov 12, 2012
    I am currently being inhabited by the soul of Warwick Davis who is making me type this Episode 8 spoiler: Darth Wicket is actually Darth Plagueis!
     
  21. Ryus

    Ryus Jedi Master star 4

    Registered:
    Feb 25, 2013
    I had a vision. In it the news was annoucing the other big three returning too. Mace Windu, Ahsoka, and Starkiller... apperently Lucas conviced Igner this would be great so they can sell more toys of them rather than having them all die.
     
    BigAl6ft6 likes this.
  22. The_Coon

    The_Coon Jedi Youngling star 1

    Registered:
    Feb 11, 2013
    the mediclorians will be the villains!!!!
     
  23. Leias_Left_Bun

    Leias_Left_Bun Jedi Master star 4

    Registered:
    Feb 18, 2013
    To get around the advanced age of the OT cast, Disney has decided to do Episode 7 as an animated musical.

    One featured new character will be "Widget," a tiny and irrepressibly cute flying droid who tries to help Luke but is always getting into trouble. Han and Leia will also have a son who, in a cruel reprisal of his father's fate, will be frozen in carbonite as a guinea pig for Luke as stormtroopers dance and sing to the tune of "Be Our Test."

    Other musical numbers include "Colors of the Force" sung by force-ghost Yoda, "I Just Can't Wait to be a Jedi" sung by Luke's son, and in a touching love song, Luke's wife reassures him that she never cared about Luke's mechanical hand as they sing the duet, "Can You Feel the Glove Tonight?"
     
    Sum-Wan likes this.
  24. furcifer

    furcifer Jedi Master star 2

    Registered:
    Jun 30, 2004
    Nobody will like the glitter and sparkle of the "new" lightsabers.
     
  25. LAJ_FETT

    LAJ_FETT Tech Admin and Collecting/Lucasfilm Ltd Mod star 9 Staff Member Administrator

    Registered:
    May 25, 2002
    I've heard through the grapevine that most of the dead characters are returning and the working title is Star Wars - the Zombies Strike Back.
     
    lbr789 likes this.