Speculation In this thread, please fabricate "scoops" for Episode 7-9!

Discussion in 'Star Wars: New Films - No Spoilers Allowed' started by BigAl6ft6, Dec 15, 2012.

  1. Ryus Force Ghost

    Member Since:
    Feb 25, 2013
    star 4
    Disney has just desided to build their first Star Wars Land. The choosen location though is Wyoming and completely surrounds Harrison Ford's house... as such he has fleed the country swearing never to return.
  2. chris hayes Jedi Grand Master

    Member Since:
    Nov 13, 2012
    star 4
    The entire plot for Episode VII is actually is Reclamation ( proposed animated series ) so the older cast will have to digitally altered to look younger as it's set 15yrs after ROTJ......
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  3. I Are The Internets Chosen One

    Member Since:
    Nov 20, 2012
    star 7
    Episode VII is actually an elaborate ploy to create Clone Wars II.
  4. Ryus Force Ghost

    Member Since:
    Feb 25, 2013
    star 4
    This time though *gasp* the clones are the bad guys from the start. They also are used to kill and replace enemies of theirs, so randomly an unbeknownst clone of senator x starts shooting up the senate chambers.

    The New Republic will use droids to fight them but hidden in their programming is order 67 to exterminate all Jedi.
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  5. T-R- Chosen One

    Member Since:
    Aug 13, 2003
    star 4
    and this time the Clone Wars are Jedi vs. Mandalorians, so the novel of TESB accurately descibes Boba Fett.
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  6. I Are The Internets Chosen One

    Member Since:
    Nov 20, 2012
    star 7
    Episode VII will be a faithful adaptation of the EU.


    European Union
  7. Ryus Force Ghost

    Member Since:
    Feb 25, 2013
    star 4
    So it's going to be about bankruptcy then? :p
    Last edited by Ryus, Apr 16, 2013
  8. I Are The Internets Chosen One

    Member Since:
    Nov 20, 2012
    star 7
    YES. Greece will be the Trade Federation.
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  9. BigAl6ft6 Force Ghost

    Member Since:
    Nov 12, 2012
    star 5
    I just bought a pack of smokes with a warning label that reads: "Luke, I am your father. Also! - Darth Plaguies" I'm still wondering how it got there.
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  10. Darth_Quintonis Jedi Master

    Member Since:
    Mar 31, 2013
    star 1
    Having been dancing and partying for 30 odd years, Star Wars Episode VII is said to pick up on exactly where we left off in Return of The Jedi, with our favorite characters still hanging out in the Ewok village on the moon of Endor. Hence, the EU is completely scrapped. A new animated series called "Ewok Party Nights" will fill us in on all the debauchery we missed out on.
    Jarren_Lee-Saber and BigAl6ft6 like this.
  11. bellatroll Jedi Master

    Member Since:
    Feb 21, 2013
  12. Immortiss Force Ghost

    Member Since:
    Mar 10, 2013
    star 4
    Darth Pire is the lastest Sith lord. He is undead and it's stars Robert Pattinson as Pire.
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  13. Toonimator Force Ghost

    Member Since:
    Aug 16, 2006
    star 3
    Patton Oswalt's got the biggest scoop on Episode VII:
  14. Darth_Zidious Force Ghost

    Member Since:
    Dec 3, 2001
    star 4
    The title has been revealed to be 'The Twin Buns', an allusion to Leia's hairdo.
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  15. Ryus Force Ghost

    Member Since:
    Feb 25, 2013
    star 4
    Sigh... appears Solo will die. Lucas just told me they writing him dying of cancer because he inhaled too many toxic fumes from all the times he blasted people...
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  16. DarthBreezy Chosen One

    Member Since:
    Jun 4, 2002
    star 6
    Breaking news - It seems that Han and Chewie have had a falling out - According to sources, Leia is 'Still spitting up hairballs'....
  17. Bobatron Jedi Grand Master

    Member Since:
    Sep 3, 2012
    star 3
    The interdimensional beings from Indiana Jones and the Kingdom of the Crystal Skull will be prominent in Episode VII, along with the overlords from Howard the Duck.
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  18. Sum-Wan Jedi Grand Master

    Member Since:
    Feb 16, 2013
    star 3

    that can't be good o_O
  19. Darth Claire Force Ghost

    Member Since:
    Dec 21, 2012
    star 4
    Benedict Cumberbatch to be in Star Wars but will once again play a high functioning sociopathic genius with the voice that makes girls swoon. Reports in are that the cumberb!tches are rejoicing.
  20. BigAl6ft6 Force Ghost

    Member Since:
    Nov 12, 2012
    star 5
    Lucas just sent me a candygram that says the opening scene is Han, Leia and Luke discussing their retirement planning portfolio. It goes on for 16 pages. There's cool stuff happening in the background, sure, Sith Lords and Stormtroppers and all that, but the script never leaves the Big Three's financial discussion. In a related scoop, Michael Arndt just took out a second mortgage on his house and the only way that happened was by allowing his financial planner to write 16 pages.
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  21. Ryus Force Ghost

    Member Since:
    Feb 25, 2013
    star 4
    All the while their very helpful banking clan retirement planner, Hego Damask, helps them plan it very gleefully.
    Last edited by Ryus, Apr 19, 2013
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  22. jasman Administrator Emeritus

    Member Since:
    Aug 29, 1998
    star 4
    In the "Han Solo" spinoff movie, the title role will be played by Shia LaBeouf.:_|
    Last edited by jasman, Apr 20, 2013
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  23. Sum-Wan Jedi Grand Master

    Member Since:
    Feb 16, 2013
    star 3

    Awww helllll naw! :eek:
  24. Ryus Force Ghost

    Member Since:
    Feb 25, 2013
    star 4
    No worries about Shia LaBeouf, my sources just told me Kathleen Kennedy just Jedi mind tricked Chris Pine to play a young Han Solo in that spinoff. Due to scheduling issues, like JJ Abrams, he wont be able to be in the third Star Trek reboot sequal. He then called Kathleen Kennedy a 'producing genius'.

    Will Shatner still hasnt gotten a phone call for a roll from either LFL or Parmount.
    BigAl6ft6 likes this.
  25. Darth_Quintonis Jedi Master

    Member Since:
    Mar 31, 2013
    star 1
    CONFIRMED:

    Episode VII to be sequel to both Star Wars Episode VI AND Back To The Future III !

    TRAILER: