Speculation In this thread, please fabricate "scoops" for Episode 7-9!

Discussion in 'Star Wars: New Films - No Spoilers Allowed' started by BigAl6ft6, Dec 15, 2012.

  1. Jabari Force Ghost

    Member Since:
    Jun 25, 2007
    star 1
    My friend who lives in Wyoming met Harrison Ford, and he told her that in a surprise twist, the Empire somehow won the war after all, and the movie opens with Han finally being captured and executed for desertion, sedition, treason, inciting rebellion, first degree murder, aiding in the escape of criminals, property damage, bribery, theft, grand theft spaceship, impersonating a stormtrooper, impersonating an Imperial Officer, possession of illegal weaponry, unlicensed modifications to a starship, drug smuggling, gambling, association with organized crime, resisting arrest, and failure to pay docking fees on 57 worlds.

    On a side note, all of the Jedi Academy extras will be chosen by combing YouTube for videos of people doing lightsaber spins in their back yards.
    Last edited by Arienne_Darklighter, May 2, 2013
  2. BigAl6ft6 Force Ghost

    Member Since:
    Nov 12, 2012
    star 5
    Michael Ardnt just sent me a PM on the TFN boards, he says he's extremely thankful for the "make up your own Ep. 7 plot" thread because he's been literally looking at a blank computer screen for about 6 months straight now, randomly breaking out crying. The stormtroopers that keep him locked in just took away his shoes as punishment. I asked him since he has internet access and is clearly being held captive against his will, why doesn't he just inform the police. His response was a link to the wookiepedia article about Waru.
    DarthRelaxus likes this.
  3. A Chorus of Disapproval New Films Riot Deterrent

    Manager
    Member Since:
    Aug 19, 2003
    star 7
    SCOOP: There will be an announcement about Episode VII on May 4th, 2013!!! [face_dancing]
    BigAl6ft6 likes this.
  4. Sith-Mullet Force Ghost

    Member Since:
    Aug 2, 2003
    star 3
    My cousins therapist knows a veterinarian who swears up and down that Chewbacca will get space rabies and will have to be put down.
    DarthRelaxus likes this.
  5. The_Coon Jedi Master

    Member Since:
    Feb 11, 2013
    star 1
    WARNING THIS ONLY MAKES SENSE IF U HAVE SEEN NIGHTS ONCE ON A TIME AND IF YOU SEE IT LATER IT HINTS AT A SPOILER



    disney has shared alot with Abc over the years perhaps neil/baelfire landed in a galaxy far far away?
  6. chris hayes Jedi Grand Master

    Member Since:
    Nov 13, 2012
    star 4
    Sorry but the announcement is now May the 4th 2014!!![face_dancing]
  7. A Chorus of Disapproval New Films Riot Deterrent

    Manager
    Member Since:
    Aug 19, 2003
    star 7
    There are probably odds in favor of that not being as "fabricated" or outlandish of a scoop as it would appear on the surface. [face_plain]
  8. chris hayes Jedi Grand Master

    Member Since:
    Nov 13, 2012
    star 4
    Michael Ardnt is secretly scrolling through our treatments , plots & title threads looking for a story he can write for EP7.......
  9. I Are The Internets Chosen One

    Member Since:
    Nov 20, 2012
    star 7
    Michael Arndt has Writer's Block.
  10. Chewgumma Chosen One

    Member Since:
    Apr 14, 2009
    star 7
    EDIT: Wrong thread
    Last edited by Chewgumma, May 5, 2013
    furcifer likes this.
  11. BigAl6ft6 Force Ghost

    Member Since:
    Nov 12, 2012
    star 5
    Michael Arndt is literally Gary Kurtz in disguise.
  12. Sistros Force Ghost

    Member Since:
    Jul 24, 2010
    star 6
    we will finally see why Boba Fett hates the Skywalkers! (Mccallum is happy)

    Max Rebo's middle name is to be revealed as Dumbo (an executive note from Disney HQ)

    Han will have a 10 minute rant saying he shot first

    we will still have no news by April 2014, it is all a April Fools hoax

    Mara Jade will be played by Megan Fox, she refuses to dye her hair for the role

    a jumping lamp will squash the letters THX at the beginning of the films

    Princess Leia will sing "someday a rogue will come" since Han is now super nice

    C-3PO is the new Sith apprentice, while R2 is revealed as the master in ep IX

    instead of rockets to fly around, R2. domed head will open up and he will fly using rotary wings

    Lando will have had a shave
    BigAl6ft6, Darth Valkyrus and Sum-Wan like this.
  13. chris hayes Jedi Grand Master

    Member Since:
    Nov 13, 2012
    star 4
    Disney buys the Enders Game movie & the movie will never be released ...Disney decided that Harrison Ford looked so good in the trailer that they will edit him from the Enders Game & insert him in Episode VII as Han Solo ....Bob said it going to be so much cheaper than paying Harrison to reprise his role .......
  14. Sum-Wan Jedi Grand Master

    Member Since:
    Feb 16, 2013
    star 3
    The Solo - Organa family will form a music band to travel the galaxy singing upbeat songs of peace and love in a yellow school bus space ship. For realz.
    BigAl6ft6 likes this.
  15. Darth Valkyrus Force Ghost

    Member Since:
    Apr 12, 2013
    star 4
    The main villain is an extremely powerful Sith lord by the name of Darth Viridis.

    He was created when a bunch of ill-advised Force cultists cloned Master Yoda. Things didn't go according to plan though, and without the background, grounding and guidance that Yoda had, the clone turned to the Dark Side of the Force.

    The result was a new reign of terror for the galaxy.

    [IMG]

    [IMG]

    Early on in Episode VII, Luke confronts Viridis but is struck down by him.

    It falls to the Solo kids and the Skywalker kids to take him down.

    An ageing Han scrapes together a ragtag bunch of mercenaries. Bossk is there, as well as his son, Bosssk and daughter, Bosska. Another of them is a mysterious Chiss female called Filonah'sok'auronis, who is a skilled Force-wielder. After a while it is revealed she is under the influence of those polyjuice nanites that Obi-Wan used in that one TCW episode, and isn't really a chiss at all.

    All of them die by the end. Eventually, R2D2 sabotages Lord Viridus's star destroyer, and it plunges into the supermassive black hole at the center of the galaxy.

    Ben Affleck is in the movie.
    Last edited by Darth Valkyrus, May 11, 2013
  16. A Chorus of Disapproval New Films Riot Deterrent

    Manager
    Member Since:
    Aug 19, 2003
    star 7
    After all of the creative thought put into that post, the best scoop is just the random tag of: Ben Affleck is in the movie.
    DarthRelaxus and Darth Valkyrus like this.
  17. Sum-Wan Jedi Grand Master

    Member Since:
    Feb 16, 2013
    star 3
    The phrase "I have a bad feeling about this" will be updated to reflect today's trends.. It will now be "I feel butt hurt about this"
    BigAl6ft6 and DarthRelaxus like this.
  18. Ryus Force Ghost

    Member Since:
    Feb 25, 2013
    star 4
    J K Rowling has exploded on Pottermore. She's demanding the british actors for Star Wars Episode VII not be the Imperials again or she'll rerelease Harry Potter, just so Star Wars can never become the top franchising series again.

    Lucas, Kennedy, Igner, and Abrams were spotted laughing at the free marketing over dinner.
    BigAl6ft6 likes this.
  19. Darth Claire Force Ghost

    Member Since:
    Dec 21, 2012
    star 4
    Plagueis to be villain in SW7 but will be a human. Tons of people on tumblr are now complaining about Lucasfilm being racist against Munns. :p
    Darth Chiznuk and Ryus like this.
  20. Ryus Force Ghost

    Member Since:
    Feb 25, 2013
    star 4
    JJ Abrams has just announced the casting choice for him... mostly since George gave him his number and he wouldnt stop calling him, at home in the middle of the night.
    [IMG]
    Last edited by Ryus, May 11, 2013
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  21. DarthRelaxus Chosen One

    Member Since:
    Apr 23, 2007
    star 5
    NSYNC to appear in EPVII.
    BigAl6ft6 likes this.
  22. Sum-Wan Jedi Grand Master

    Member Since:
    Feb 16, 2013
    star 3
    It has been confirmed that the Millenium Falcon will appear in the sequel trilogy, but it won't be piloted by Han Solo. Instead, it will be piloted by the main villain, who will use it to vanquish the New Republic. Turns out, the Falcon has exchanged hands many times since the OT, thanks to its owners gambling addictions... Damn Sabacc..
    BigAl6ft6 likes this.
  23. A Chorus of Disapproval New Films Riot Deterrent

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    Member Since:
    Aug 19, 2003
    star 7
    The Whills will appear in Episode I
    Jet Li has been cast as Boba Fett in Episode II
    Palpatine is revealed as a clone of Darth Sidious in Episode III
    DarthRelaxus likes this.
  24. chris hayes Jedi Grand Master

    Member Since:
    Nov 13, 2012
    star 4
    Breaking : As Episode VII is being filmed partly in Scotland - J.J Abrams has decided that the opening scroll will be bag piped in & the loch Ness monster will have a fight with Luke Skywalker much like the Rancor seen from EP6.................
    Last edited by chris hayes, May 12, 2013
  25. Darth Valkyrus Force Ghost

    Member Since:
    Apr 12, 2013
    star 4