Saga It Takes Two - RotS AU, Anakin & Obi-Wan, Chapter 8 up 11/8!

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Title: It Takes Two
Author: amidalachick
Timeframe: Episode III
Characters: Anakin Skywalker, Obi-Wan Kenobi, various other people whose names I'm too lazy to type right now. Besides, they'll show up soon enough.
Genre: Insanity. That's not a genre? OK, then...humor, mostly
Summary: Yet another RotS AU. Right from the start, Anakin and Obi-Wan aren't getting along. The Jedi Council is forced to take drastic measures to keep their best fighting team together...
Notes: This was inspired by the TV shows Family Guy and The Simpsons. I think it's my first time writing action. I need sleep.

And now, I would like to say a HUGE thank you to VadersMistress for beta-ing this. You're the best!

Now, on to the story!

Chapter 1
The space above Coruscant was packed with ships attacking each other.

Hundreds of clone starfighers battled Separatists forces. In the middle of the mess was General Grievous' ship, with the Republic's kidnapped Chancellor, Palpatine, somewhere on board.

Two Jedi fighters were making their way through the battle, as well. Anakin Skywalker and Obi-Wan Kenobi were on their way to rescue Palpatine.

"This is where the fun begins, eh?" Anakin said over the comm as several Separatist droid ships headed towards them.

"Maybe for you!" Obi-Wan retorted.

The two Jedi fired, shooting down most of the droids. But two more came in from behind, locking onto Obi-Wan and firing at him.

"Anakin? A little help here?" Obi-Wan said.

"Just a second," Anakin said. "Move right...aha!"

Obi-Wan saw the explosions behind him and sighed.

"Flying's for droids," he mumbled.

"What?" Anakin said.

"Nothing," Obi-Wan said.

They continued to fly towards Grievous' ship, surrounded by almost-constant laser fire. Suddenly, a new threat hit them.

"Buzz droids," Anakin warned.

"I know," Obi-Wan said, just as several droids latched on. They began scurrying around and destroying his ship methodically.

"Don't worry, I've got them," Anakin said. He began firing on the droids.

"Hold your fire!" Obi-Wan yelped. "You're not helping!"

"Sorry for trying to save you," Anakin snapped. "Now hold still!"

"Anakin!" Obi-Wan exclaimed as Anakin brought his Interceptor alongside and scraped its wing along the wing of Obi-Wan's own ship, knocking the droids off into space.

"They're gone," Anakin informed him, sounding pleased with himself. "Let's go get the Chancellor."

Leaving the clones to fight the space battle, Anakin and Obi-Wan made it the rest of the way to Grievous's ship before trouble struck again.

"The shields are still up!" Obi-Wan called.

"Oh, yeah," Anakin said. He fired, destroying the shield controls. The shields fell, and they slid into the hangar.

The moment they slithered into the hangar, they jumped out of their ships, lightsabers ignited.

"Now we just have to find the Chancellor and get out of here," Obi-Wan said.

"No kidding," Anakin said.

They watched in silence while Anakin's astromech droid, R2-D2, plugged into the ship's computers and located Palpatine.

"I sense a trap," Obi-Wan commented.

"There's no trap," Anakin said impatiently.

"There is," Obi-Wan said.

"Let's just get Palpatine," Anakin said, rolling his eyes and marching away.

Obi-Wan hurried after him.

 

Hmmm...so its ROTS with more tension and bickering....

I'm loving it already!

So Anakin and Obi are gonna fall apart..and the Council is gonna try and keep them together..
if this is inspired by the simpsons and the family guy, well wow, the possibilities will be endless.

My only complaint? You need to post more!! Chapter One was simply not enough.

Pleaaaase PM me when you update.

 

I'm always the last to know! She didn't tell me this was coming up! Bad girl! But I loved it! Bravo!

 

Inspired by the Simpsons and the Family Guy? This is going to be fun!

Actually, I didn't need to know that to know it was going to be fun--reading the first post was enough of a clue for me.

 

JOINME: Yep! That's pretty much what'll happen. But I'm not saying any more. Thanks for reading, and I will definitely PM you.

VaderLVR: Well, she actually read it for me about a month ago, and I only got around to posting...uh, now. Thank you so much for reading!

TrinityDay: Oh, thank you! I hope you'll continue to enjoy it!

I know I sound like a broken record, and you're probably all bored now, but thanks again to everyone who's read this! I really do appreciate it.

OK, OK, I'm shutting up. Here's the next part!!!

Chapter 2
Because Palpatine was being held at the top level of the ship, Anakin and Obi-Wan found an elevator and talked Artoo into activating it. The droid soon had it going, but in the wrong direction.

"No, Artoo," Obi-Wan said into his comm. "We want to go up, not down."

"I've got a better idea," Anakin said. He pulled out his lightsaber.

"What are you doing?" Obi-Wan asked.

"Getting Palpatine," Anakin said, cutting a hole in the ceiling and jumping out.

"Anakin," Obi-Wan said warningly. But Anakin had already disappeared. Obi-Wan gave an exasperated sigh. "Always on the move."

Finally, Artoo got the elevator going the right way. Obi-Wan wondered where Anakin was. A loud thump gave him his answer.

"You're back," he said as he turned to see Anakin picking himself up off the floor.

"Who were you expecting?" Anakin asked. "Count Dooku?"

"I think he's here, you know," Obi-Wan said.

"Oh please," Anakin grumbled. "You think this is a trap. You think Count Dooku's here. Why are you always such a worrier?"

"I'm a realist, not a worrier," Obi-Wan said. "You should try it sometime."

"Do you have to turn everything into a lecture?" Anakin groaned.

Before Obi-Wan could reply, the elevator stopped with a slight lurch. Emerging from the elevator, they found themselves on a balcony overlooking a large, sparsely furnished room. Palpatine was sitting in a oversized chair, staring out the window.

"Chancellor, we've come to rescue you." Obi-Wan called as the two Jedi jumped lightly to the floor below and started running towards Palpatine.

Palpatine spun around.

"Count Dooku!" he called.

"No, Chancellor, I'm Obi-Wan Kenobi," Obi-Wan said, afraid the Chancellor was suffering head injuries.

"Yes, but he's Count Dooku," Palpatine said, tossing his head to indicate the elderly former Jedi, who had appeared on the balcony behind Obi-Wan and Anakin.

Anakin held back a snort of laughter.

"Master Kenobi, Knight Skywalker," Dooku called. "It's a pleasure to see you again."

"Let's do this together, shall we?" Obi-Wan said to Anakin.

"My powers have doubled since last time," Anakin said smugly. "I can handle it myself."

"No, you can't," Obi-Wan said.

"Yes, I can," Anakin said.

Dooku chose that moment to attack, taking the two Jedi by surprise. They recovered quickly, though, and a long, hard battle began. Despite his age, Dooku was an expert swordsman. Anakin and Obi-Wan fought furiously, but Dooku kept countering their attacks.

"He's...he's too dangerous!" Palpatine called suddenly from his chair. "We need to leave! Now!"

Palpatine's voice startled all three of them. They all paused, just in time to feel the ship lurch. Anakin and Obi-Wan suddenly remembered that the original purpose of their mission was to rescue Palpatine. Quickly, they devised a plan.

Obi-Wan turned back to Dooku, who had recovered his composure, and renewed the battle while Anakin went to free Palpatine. But Dooku was too powerful. He raised his hand, using the Force to fling Obi-Wan against the far wall, then drop a piece of the balcony on him.

"You've lost again," Dooku said pleasantly. He somersaulted up to the balcony and waved. "Good day."

Anakin hesitated for just a moment, torn between catching Dooku, keeping Palpatine safe, and seeing if Obi-Wan was injured. He decided that whatever Obi-Wan's condition was, a few

 

I don't think I can walk," Palpatine whined.

ha ha!

the image of Anakin lugging along both of them is hilarious.

Great update! Can't wait for more...

 

"Who were you expecting?" Anakin asked. "Count Dooku?"
"I think he's here, you know," Obi-Wan said.
"Oh please," Anakin grumbled. "You think this is a trap. You think Count Dooku's here. Why are you always such a worrier?"

You're characters are LOL hilarious!

 

Adding my voice to those who think your characters are funny and just all-around fun.

 

Funniest lines:

"Count Dooku!" he called.
"No, Chancellor, I'm Obi-Wan Kenobi,"

I dunno why, but that just hit me as hilarious.

Best lines:

"Let's do this together, shall we?" Obi-Wan said to Anakin.
"My powers have doubled since last time," Anakin said smugly. "I can handle it myself."
"No, you can't," Obi-Wan said.
"Yes, I can," Anakin said.

Ah, the way it should have been! Yer doin a great job with this amidalachick, and I look forward to reading more in the future!

 

Great job! Can't wait for more.

 

good work keep it up PM me for updates

 

This is a good chuckle. Always nice to have a laugh among the angst and mush. I could so see the two of them bickering. Please PM me with updates.

 

Love it! PLEASE, UPDATE!!!!

 

Oh, my word! The banter between those two was priceless! Perfect Obi and Anakin was perfect. And him having to carry both was awesome.

Can't wait for more, dudette.

 

*bangs head on keyboard* How did it get to be over a month since the last update? I'm sorry. Anyways...

JOINME: Yeah, poor Anakin always has to do all the work. Thanks for reading!

correllian_ale: Thank you!

TrinityDay: Awww, thanks!

JediMindTrick000: I'm glad you liked those parts! Thanks so much for reading!

KELIA: Thank you!

Master_Jedi_Singh: Thanks, and I will!

PadawanKayla: Thank you so much! I'm always glad when someone gets a laugh from my writing.

Discorpor8: Thanks! Update coming soon!

RK_Striker_JK_5: Thanks for stopping by, and thanks so much for the comments!

Thank you again, everyone! Now, I'll shut up and update.

Chapter 3
Unfortunately for them, the clones had been doing their own job. The Republic forces damaged Grievous?s ship, and nothing was working right, including the gravity generators. The elevator shaft had turned into a horizontal corridor, so Anakin decided to take advantage of the situation. With Obi-Wan still on his back and Palpatine at his side, he started running along the shaft. But, an abrupt gravity shift returned the shaft to its proper upright position. Anakin slipped, knocking Palpatine down, too. Palpatine fell past him, managing to stop himself by grabbing Anakin's ankle. Anakin caught hold of a ledge, stopping his own fall. Now they were dangling over a seemingly endless drop, with only Anakin's mechanical hand to keep them from falling.

"Why am I always the one?" Anakin muttered.

"Help me!" Palpatine exclaimed.

"I'm trying," Anakin said through gritted teeth.

At that moment, Obi-Wan was regaining consciousness. The first thing he noticed was Palpatine's voice saying, "I'm slipping! Help me!"

"Chancellor? Are you alright?" Obi-Wan asked, blinking to clear his vision.

"No, I'm-" Palpatine began.

"He's fine," Anakin said in an annoyed tone. "We'll all be fine, if we stay calm. Chancellor, take a deep breath, hang on, and don't look down."

Obi-Wan suddenly realized that he was holding on to Anakin, who was holding on to a ledge. Then he looked down and saw that Palpatine was hanging off Anakin's ankle.

"How did we end up here?" Obi-Wan asked.

"Never mind," Anakin said.

"Where's Dooku?" Obi-Wan said.

"Gone," Anakin said.

"You mean a mere Sith lord was too much for the great Knight Skywalker after all?" Obi-Wan said in an amused tone.

"I'll drop you if you don't shut up," Anakin said in a warning tone.

"Temper, temper," Obi-Wan said. He looked up, then down. "Did you have a plan for getting out of here?"

"Yes, a plan would be wonderful," Palpatine said anxiously.

"I was working on it," Anakin said.

"Was?" Obi-Wan repeated.

"I can't think with you breathing down my neck all the time," Anakin said. "Now just shut up and let me handle it."

"Well, why not, since you've obviously done such a fine job of handling it so far," Obi-Wan said sarcastically.

"Alright, you want a plan? Here's a plan!" Anakin snapped.

He released the ledge, and the three of them fell several floors before hitting the sides of the shaft and sliding. Then gravity shifted again, making the shaft go horizontal once more. They scrambled to their feet and started running along it until they came to a door and fell out into a hallway.

"Oh, that was brilliant," Obi-Wan said sarcastically as he stood up. "You know, this is some rescue, even for you."

"I should have left you back there," Anakin said, walking away as fast as he could.

"I should-" Obi-Wan suddenly glanced back over his shoulder. "Wait a minute. Where's Palpatine?"

Anakin stopped and turned. Involuntarily, his eyes met Obi-Wan's. He quickly averted his gaze to the empty hallway.

"I'll be right back," he said curtly, brushing past Obi-Wan.

He found Palpatine just around a bend, sitting on the floor and

 

"Ray shields," Obi-Wan said. "How'd that happen? We're smarter than this."

I loved that line in ROTS! Ewan's delivery was perfection. Man, I'm getting an Abbot and Costello vibe from those two. And even though I know Palpatine's the bad guy, I do feel sorry for him. Listening to those two...

And of course, R2 saves the day.

 

I can't think with you breathing down my neck all the time ... Anakin says with Obi-Wan on his back.

"I am not a vetoer," Obi-Wan said.

"Are too," Anakin said.

"Am not," Obi-Wan said, folding his arms defensively.

"Are too," Anakin said, folding his own arms.

Now boys, boys. Behave yourselves! Perfect!

I loved all of it. Great job!

 

This sounds like some conversations I have overheard my boys having! Loved it!

 

"I can't think with you breathing down my neck all the time," Anakin said.



This is great! They're just like two little kids. Or teenagers, depending on the people you know. Palpatine's whining, oh lord.

PM me when you update, please.

 

Love the banter!


Man, I'm getting an Abbot and Costello vibe from those two

Ha ha, I agree!

Can't wait for more of this AU!

 

Hahahahah...He called Obi "Mr. Veto"...hahahaha...give me a minute...

 

I'll drop you if you don't shut up," Anakin said in a warning tone.

"Temper, temper," Obi-Wan said


haha this is rediculous..


funny stuff

 

This is great, please PM me. Thanks.

 

Update time!

RK_Striker_JK_5: Sympathy for Palpatine? Cool! I've never actually seen or listened to Abbot and Costello, but I have looked to the Three Stooges for inspiration... And, yes, Artoo's always the hero. Thanks so much for reading, and I'm glad you enjoyed it!

PadawanKayla: What better time for him to say it? Thanks very much!

VaderLVR: Thank you!

JadeSolo: Now how am I ever going to top that line? I'm glad you're liking bratty Ani and Obi and whiny Palpy! Thank you so much for reading, and I will be sure to add you to my PM's!

JOINME: Thank you so much! More is coming very soon!

Jaira: Thanks for reading!

light-: Thank you!

Darth-Buddy: Thanks! You shall be PM'ed!

Also, thanks again to VadersMistress for betaing, and thanks again to everyone for reading (lurkers included)! Now, the next chapter!

Chapter 4
"Oh dear," Palpatine said nervously as they approached the bridge doors. "What if we run into General Grievous? And isn't Count Dooku still around somewhere?"

"Anakin and I...or one of us, at least...will take care of them," Obi-Wan said.

"Why don't you go ahead," Anakin said. "You can talk to them and negotiate us out of here."

"I've had about enough of you and your sarcasm," Obi-Wan said. "Now would you stop with your childish insults and concentrate on the mission?"

"I thought you weren't speaking to me," Anakin said.

"And I thought you weren't speaking to me," Obi-Wan retorted.

"I'm not," Anakin said.

"Good," Obi-Wan said.

Behind them, Palpatine cleared his throat. They looked back at him.

"It would be nice to get back on planet today," Palpatine said with a little shrug.

The two Jedi mumbled apologies and concentrated on ignoring each other. With their lightsabers in hand, they burst onto the bridge and found it empty.

"Who's flying this thing?" Anakin asked idly.

"It must be on autopilot," Obi-Wan said in a low voice. "Keep your guard up. This could be a-"

"Don't say it," Anakin said. He pointed at Obi-Wan in a warning gesture. "If I hear one more time that you think something's a trap...hey, what's that?"

Obi-Wan noticed at the same time. A datapad was lying on the control panel. Both of them reached for it, and they managed to grab opposite sides of it.

"I had it first," Anakin said, trying to yank it away from Obi-Wan. "Let go."

"You let go," Obi-Wan said, tugging at his end.

Palpatine came up behind them and snatched it out of both their hands.

"May I?" he said with a little smile.

Glaring at each other again, Anakin and Obi-Wan turned to face him. Palpatine cleared his throat and read aloud, "Dear Jedi, Ha ha! We've escaped! You lose! Sincerely, Count Dooku & General Grievous."

"Those-" Anakin began, clenching his hands into fists.

"Anakin, calm down," Obi-Wan said.

"Don't tell me to calm down!" Anakin snapped.

"Well, you need someone to tell you, since you'd never do it yourself," Obi-Wan said.

"In case you didn't notice, they're our enemies," Anakin said coldly. "They've gotten away again. Meaning this war will go on even longer. Why exactly should I be calm?"

"You're a Jedi, that's why," Obi-Wan said in the same cold tone. "You should be able to control your emotions." He lowered his voice so that Palpatine couldn't hear. "Then again...you've never been good at controlling your emotions, have you?"

"What are you talking about?" Anakin snarled.

"You and Padmé know exactly what I'm talking about," Obi-Wan said.

"What?" Anakin gasped. "How did you...I never...how dare you!"

Before Obi-Wan could reply, the ship gave a violent lurch that knocked everyone to the ground.

They all looked towards the viewscreens and saw that the back half of the ship had broken off. Flames licked at what was le

 

OMG!!!!!! That was hilarious, amidalachick! Yes, I can see Three Stooges in the work. Actualy, Abbot and Costello are a famous comedy team from the same era. they did the 'Who's on first?' routine. Here is more info on them.

And love the note! Awesome! I can see Dooku and Grievous snickering as they wrote it.