Jedi attachment and marriage...

This just kind of popped up in another thread and I am sure it has probably been brought up before...but why is it Jedi are not allowed to marry?

I have often wondered why it is that Jedi are not allowed to love...Does it cloud the mind?!? In part this is probably the biggest reason the Republic age Jedi fell.

In older era games like KOTOR...it doesn't appear that Jedi of that age are not allowed to love.

Just curious as to why the republic age Jedi are not allowed to marry, other than Ki Adi.

 

Exceptions have been made for beings of many a species whose race demands as many marriages as possible for survival, but, in general, it comes down to focus. As Anakin says, love is encouraged by the Jedi mandate. "Attachment is forbidden. Possession is forbidden."

Yes, it would tend to cloud the mind, because I would think the Jedi would realize the serious implications of marriage: the family comes first. Remember that the Jedi Order is similar in many respects to a monastery (and many monks take vows of celibacy). The Jedi do not marry so that nothing will come between them and the lifestyle to which they have been sworn. It's the same reason a master will only have one padawan; the more commitments a man makes, the more limited his focus on any one can become. The life of the Jedi, as Qui-gon said, is not an easy one. They devote their whole selves to the keeping of the Code and the guarding of justice in the galaxy. They're "married to the Force," as it were.

It's also suggested that the rule didn't apply to masters, but came from a restriction placed on padawans, so that nothing would interfere with their relationship to the knight or master training him.

According to the EU (I haven't read any of it, but I'm going by things like the TFN timelines), the idea that marriage is discouraged within the Order is a fairly new idea; I've seen a few fanfics that explain why this is... poke around a bit, and I'm sure you'll find some. It's easy to see, though, how a thing like unrequited, unreturned love could lead to a falling-away from the Light, and what effect would losing a SPOUSE on a mission have to a Jedi Knight?

Of course, there are just as many fics with children of Old Republic Jedi, too, or love stories within the Order. Be it a sect that downplays archaic traditions or just two star-crossed lovers facing the implications of a forbidden relationship, you're going to get people who view restrictions like that the same way the Pirates of the Caribbean viewed the restrictions on them: "Besides, the Code's more actually what you'd call 'guidelines' than rules."

 

Thanks TGJ...LOL the line from POTC...

Your explanation sums up what i was wondering about. I was really just curious as to when the marriage thing became a part of the code as I think it was a strong reason why the Republic age Jedi fell...but as you pointed out..."The life of a Jedi is not an easy one."

As far as monks go...yes they take vows, but they also are not in everday situations around many members of the opposite sex, so they are not directly tempted everyday because they live in a monastery and rarely leave it. Yes Jedi live in the temple, but most are constantly out of the temple...Just trying to make a point...

 

Yes Jedi live in the temple, but most are constantly out of the temple...Just trying to make a point...

But they aren't necessarily in one place for very long.

Now picture being married to a Jedi Knight... who then has to go to the other side of the Galaxy. Is gone for 8 months or so. You get one message. Find out later he was being held captive & tortured by a pirate gang. He escapes. Stops in for a two-day visit on his way to the treaty negotiations on planet J. Is gone for another month. You hear a few sly rumors about how what he might have done to get randy Queen Zoola to agree to Point number 4. You get a message; he'll be at the Jedi Temple for 6 months. You gather up your life, move to Coruscant, try to find affordable housing and a job (Jedi don't exactly get salaries) and find he's been sent on an emergency mission to the Corellian Sector. He's guarding Senator Velda, who's 21 and gorgeous with no stretchmarks or post-pregnancy pounds, and who wears her native apparel consisting of two strategically placed scarves and a lot of jewellry. She's also got the Sakra Prize for Science, an enormous fortune, and founded the Velda Foundation for the Protection of Orphaned Kittens. He's gone 3 months, and is wounded when he prevents her assassination, sent to Dantooine to recover. So, you pull up stakes, go to Dantooine. Get two weeks together. Then back to Coruscant. By the time you get to Coruscant...

Not to mention that your kids are kidnapped on the way home from school by the evil scientist who thinks she can use the midichlorians in their blood for her experiments.

Or YOU are snatched on your way to the grocery store by afore-mentioned crimelord's gang, who want to use you as leverage against him.

Or your parents are furious at you because he's enforcing Republic Trade Sanctions against your home planet, and are pressuring you to get him to let up on them, because the politicos on Coruscant don't deserve your hard-earned tax dollars. And he hasn't seen the twins since they were born, though he thinks he may get to stop by for little Mari-Su's 6th birthday...

You get the idea. Think of the high divorce rates among police or military personnel, higher than almost any other projessions... Very, very sad.

 

Renata makes an excellent point, though I was laughing at loud at the description of the Senator and her kitten-foundation...

Yes, most monks rarely leave the monastery, but they do take the vows, meaning they'd remain celibate even if a woman decided the monastery was the safest place for her to seek clemency (actually not a bad choice in a lot of cases). No, they're not around much temptation... but that's all the more reason for the Jedi to make it a rule.

 

Very funny Mistress Renata

Um... here's how I handled it in the Obi-Wan romance fic I'm working on...

First off, I took "attachment" as far more literal than just emotional bond. I mean, clearly you can see that Jedi *do* have emotional bonds towards their padawans and masters and friends. Jedi are not stones, they do feel emotions and make friends (and how can one make a friend withouth attachment? You can't). So in my fic, "attachment", in *that* sense is not forbidden.

I took the meaning of attachment as the bond of matrimony (something that ties/bonds things together) and it's there for much the same reasons Renata stated plus I'll add one. A Jedi cannot vow his life to someone (as in marriage) or something (as in another cause) if he's already vowed his life to the Jedi. It would be a kind of bigamy, if you think about it. Why it started, I don't know but I think a combination of it being such a difficult and dangerous life for a Jedi's family, the danger of a Jedi's mind becoming clouded, and already having vowed his life to the Jedi Order, are all legit reasons why it happened. I'm not so sure the message will be in the end that this was correct though. I mean, it may turn out to all be part of how the Jedi Order went wrong... look at Luke. He's married and has yet to go all Sithy.

Quote from Chapter 18 of Coruscant Girl Episode I - Knightshift

"Don't you see?" Nahlia stood up in front of him and slowly stepped closer. As he remained there with his arms folded, a look on his face of someone tormented by his own feelings, she could see he still didn't understand. "They can't forbid you to love, it's against human nature. We all love something. It's what we do with that love, that can sometimes lead people to a dark place... but it can also lead to very wonderful things..."

sg

 

MR...after LMAO on your humorous reply, i have to re-iterate that my point is that Jedi are out and about a lot more than Monks are. Monks sit in their monastery chanting most of the time. Jedi are are more apt to encounter those emotions where as Monks have a more "Out of sight, out of mind" ability.

I can understand why, to an extent, the Jedi are forbidden to be in relationships. My point more or less is that it was because of this core value, the Republic age Jedi fell.

 

You don't know many monks, do you? They are frequently out of their monasteries; remember that one of their primary activities is missionary work. They also run hospitals (nursing orders -- the "Hospitallers?") and schools (many Catholic Colleges were founded and continue to be run by Dominicans, Franciscans and Jesuits). Other Orders (both male & female) run homeless shelters and drug rehab programs. Indeed, nowadays very, VERY few orders are cloistered. They can't afford it.

Most importantly (and I think Ty-Gon is taking the same inspiration), you've got the Knights Templar, warrior-monks of the Crusades, the professional army of the Pope who ended up being betrayed, hunted down and executed by the French King. They are so obviously the model for the Jedi Order. Indeed, no Templar Knight was allowed to travel or eat alone, there always had to be at least two.

Even in Asia, many Buddhist monks were not and are not cloistered, but play very active roles in their communities. And they all take vows of celibacy, too.

As to the loss of core values as their downfall... I dunno... I think that being willing to sacrifice your own personal comfort and happiness in order to love & serve a greater community is pretty admirable. Choosing the needs of the many over the needs of one is, too.