Jedi Dreams (Thread II): Critiques welcome as per usual

Discussion in 'Fan Fiction Stories--Classic JC Board (Reply-Only)' started by Alli-Wan, May 14, 2000.

Thread Status:
Not open for further replies.
  1. borjis fett Jedi Knight

    Member Since:
    Sep 25, 1999
    star 3
    What I did was submit my plot and a few concept art screen shots last January. After thinking it over, TFN accepted my submission and I kept them up to date as milestones in the film progressed.... As of a few weeks ago I have a test trailer under the "coming soon" area. It's "Tales of a Black Sun Vigo" if you are interested.

    If anything you might just want to give them a heads up.
  2. Jedi Gryph Grin Jedi Master

    Member Since:
    Sep 25, 1999
    star 4
    I just cannot put into words how much I love this story!!

    Someone needs to drop Jude Watson down a very deep, very dark hole and let Alli Wan start writing the JA books!!

    Waiting patiently for more.
  3. Alli-Wan Jedi Knight

    Member Since:
    Dec 21, 1999
    star 3
    Sorry about there being no post last night everyone. My university's entire network was down. (Attack of the MAC users. Mac Networks are amazing things until they stop working, but never in my life had I seen so many computers rendered utterly useless so quickly. I couldn't even log in!) Anyway, I head about the big move and shutdown tommorow, so I will try to post before then. If I don't get it done soon enough, well that's what e-mail is for. Hope everyone gets through the transfer okay, and a small reminder, when you call up your old threads to be transferred, don't forget to call up the originals too if they're on a different thread. --AWK
  4. Jaya Solo Jedi Grand Master

    Member Since:
    Jul 12, 1999
    star 5
    Wow! Thanks for emailing us the posts. At least the new board will let us post more wihtout screw ups (hopefully). Great story. Continue to post.
  5. Alli-Wan Jedi Knight

    Member Since:
    Dec 21, 1999
    star 3
    Dear all,

    We seem to be back, somewhat. I'll e-mail Force support in a few days if the bugs don't fix themselves (like why half my posts are cut off in the middle- don't worry too much, I have the whole thing saved) and why we're hearing stuff about TFN films on pages 5 and 6. In any case, here's the posts that have been written up if you aren't on the e-mail list.

    Enjoy, AWK

    *******

    (Jedi? Why would a Jedi be here?) Ev Loki looked up in confusion. And kept looking up. Whoever was questioning him was rather tall. And rather strong-looking.

    "Jedi?" he squeaked. (Why would someone be looking for a Jedi around here?)

    "Yeah," the tall man answered with a sneer. "A Jedi. Big, strong, carries one of them lightsabre-things. Defends justice and rights wrongs." (Rights wrongs?) Ev's eyes narrowed. He had been gaining control of his muddled thoughts and emotions and as his mind came to order, he found he was . . . angry! He had been made to look stupid IN FRONT OF AXIN! He had been made to look stupid by that girly boy IN FRONT OF AXIN! Axin's mother had seen it happen! That coward-lady Gantos had seen him look stupid too. And now this man, this tall, nasty man was treating him like an idiot too. Ev glanced down. His pants were dry. And with the kelp manure he had walked through and the slight breeze in the air, this man could have known . . . what happened. He didn't even come from the same direction as Ev had. The brook was behind him and this man's pants were still wet. There was no reason for this man to think he was stupid. At least he had a reason to make Axin feel stupid. (Of course there was a reason, wasn't there?)

    "Why do you want to know?" Ev did his best to sound innocent and confused. He was confused; it was the innocent part that gave him trouble. It made little difference however, as innocence was a quality quite alien to his interrogator. The tall man gave him another sneer.

    "Because I need a wrong righted. Get it?" Ev nodded dumbly. (Creep.) Inside he was grinning. (He is so full of poo-doo.) Even so, Ev decided this man could use just a little more poo-doo in his life. Oh yes. And with delight, he found the perfect way to bring poo-doo into another person's life at the same time. (Two wellets with one stone.) They were going to pay for making him look stupid. All of them. Ev schooled his features to look as one awed. It wasn't difficult; he was quite the young con man.

    "Do you mean the great Jedi, Master Muse?" The man frowned down at him.

    "Maybe." Ev tried not to squirm in delight.

    "Oh you must. He's the only Jedi around here. He has a great big lightsabre and a long flowing robe. If you need any wrongs righted sir," Ev blinked up at him, seemingly with all the truthfulness of naïve youth. "Then he's your man." The man raised an eyebrow.

    "So where is he now, kid?" (Oh, he's buying it!) Ev desperately resisted the urge to laugh. It was so perfect. So absolutely perfect. He wished he could be there to see the look on this man's face when he met the 'great Jedi warrior.' (Pathetic dolt!)

    "Oh, he's staying at the Gantos' house now." The man's eyes lit up. "I'm sure he's fighting evil or something. He wouldn't tell me what when I saw him." In a flash, the man leaned down and grabbed Ev by the forearms.

    "The Gantos' house! Where is it?" Ev gasped. Suddenly the man had gotten a look in his eye that the boy did not like at all.

    "A-across the kelp field!" he blurted out. "Third house past the recycler!" Ev's eyes grew wide as the man shook him once.

    "And is the kid there too?"

    "Kid?" (What kid? Mr. and Mrs. Gantos don't have any kids.)

    "The Jedi kid. The one with the braid?" (Jedi kid? Braid?)

    "Th-there was a kid with a braid." (How does he know about the kid with the braid?)

    The tall man's face suddenly broke into a grin so cold and evil Ev's heart skipped a beat and his stomach heaved. Ev himself was mean, he was cruel, he was compassionless and unkind . . . but he was not evil. A
  6. Alli-Wan Jedi Knight

    Member Since:
    Dec 21, 1999
    star 3
    And another one? ;)

    Enjoy some more, AWK

    ********

    "Speaking." (Who else would be here? No one else knows how to program this thing!)

    /I know you're speaking. Put Guff on the line./ (What?)

    {They're not recognizing your voice.} Guff gave the Wookie a puzzled look. (Why?)

    {You're not stuttering.} (I'm not?) Guff replayed the last few minutes back in his mind. No, he hadn't been. He turned back to Sinew.

    "Oh."

    "Gu, Guff here." It was kind of amusing. Most of the time he struggled to make himself understood. Now he was intentionally garbling his speech to avoid suspicion.

    /Guff! I found them! Some local village idiot saw them, gave me an address. Saw the master and the kid!/

    (SITH!) Guff channeled the call onto the cabin's speakers and tapped Sinew's elbow to get his attention.

    /Jinn's using a different name and all, but they're at Gan--/

    "Do, do you thugh, think you can, an, use more name, names? He, he won't nee, need special powers to figh, find you, if he heh, hears you on the c-c-comlink." As his tight control began to lose it's focus, Guff's stutters became more genuine.

    /Uh, right. So, uh, Guff--/ Guff sighed. It was beginning. He had known it would be soon, but he still didn't feel ready for it. (Oh you know you'll never feel ready for it. Just get on with it.)

    "G-go to th-the street ad-address. Con-confirm they are th-there. W-wait for in-instructions. DON'T k-k-kill them." (Please, just obey the directions for once in your life!)

    /Yeah, yeah, the Boss has plans, I KNOW Guff./

    {Everybody knows.} Guff gave Sinew the 'HUSH' look. No that it mattered; his finger had been off the transmit button.

    "T-take someone w-with you. D-don't g-g-go alone." (All we need is the men MORE scattered about.)

    /Yeah, sure Guff./ The line was cut off.

    {So now it begins.} Sinew checked the engines (still in readiness) and the weapons (still charged to full capacity). He also rechecked the targeting systems, then reached overhead to be sure his personal blaster was still charged and hidden from sight. It was. Not to mention the two blasters he carried besides his native crossbow.

    "Y-yes."

    {You said it would be soon. I'd call this soon.}

    "N-not this s-soon. Some-thing isn't right."

    {What? They know Gantos's address. Do you think they left already?}

    "I don't know. It has begun, but something's not right."

    {They've got the wrong house?} Guff shrugged slightly, all expressions becoming muted as his trance reasserted itself.

    "Maybe. But something's not right."

    Guff pulled the headset back on his ears and turned to the console to deliver the news to the Boss. Sinew turned back to his own console with concern, hoping whatever was wrong righted itself.

    (A wrong to be righted?) He smiled a bit ruefully. Wasn't that what Jedi were for anyway?

  7. Alli-Wan Jedi Knight

    Member Since:
    Dec 21, 1999
    star 3
    And yet more. Okay, now wer're caught up, assuming it goes through. --AWK

    *******

    "And what else do you do at a Gourd Festival?" Obi-Wan asked, genuinely curious. Coruscant was definitely not an agricultural world, and agrarian holidays he had attended on other workds often had religious overtones to them. It was unusual to hear about a festival in which the sole purpose seemed to be overindulging and having fun. Nowhere was there any mention of animal sacrifice (unless you counted the available grilled items), meditation and deep thought (unless you counted the trivia bowl), devout artistry (unless you counted the village dancing), or prayer (although this year the local minister was the first volunteer for something called "the dunk tank.") It was . . . intriguing. (Too bad we can't stay.) He would just have to enjoy it vicariously. (Besides, Master Qui-Gon would NEVER go to something like this unless it culminated in the signing of a peace treaty, or was the only possible way to avoid Phlegmian Flu.) Obi-Wan smirked slightly. According to Master Yoda, Qui-Gon would do ANYTHING to avoid catching that bug again.

    "Lot's of stuff." Axin frowned. There was so much to tell the droid, and he couldn't remember what he was forgetting to say. "Like . . . " He flipped through his reader frowning. (Like what?)

    "What about all the contests, Axin?" Tebla prompted. "Your father won all those ribbons."

    "Ribbons?" the droid asked, obviously confused as to how a grown man would win ribbons, and what he would do with such a thing should he win them. Axin found a picture to explain.

    "See?" he said, pointing out an image of a grinning little girl holding a brael berry pie as older woman pinned a bright yellow ribbon to her collar. "She has the best pie in the pie-baking contest, so she gets a ribbon." The droid nodded in comprehension.

    "Did your father bake a pie?" Axin giggled. Tebla snorted.

    "No!" He laughed harder. "He can't cook like Queen Bauble or Mr. Master." The droid smiled at the memory of many good meals. "He won ribbons for his porcins." Axin pointed to another picture of a variety of livestock. "And one year he won a green ribbon for some kelp lambs. They were really good, but Mr. Kupkil's were better. But he owns a whole ranch of kelps so he has a lot more chances." The small boy scrutinized the droid. "Do you have any contests like that on Chorus-kant?" Obi-Wan frowned in thought as he perused the list of contests and events in Axin's reader.

    "Well, we don't really grow much of anything on Coruscant, other than houseplants, and even that can be a little expensive when you first start out because you have to buy imported soil, so we really don?t have giant gourds. But there is the Horticulture Society, and they have contests every year for crossing different flowers. We used to go on field trips to see all the flowers they made when I was your age." Axin sat, entranced. He never thought droids would get to go on field trips. That had to be more fun that just getting programmed. Maybe it was a special treat in droid school. "And we would have tournaments and fairs in, uh, school. My friend Garen and I once made a volcano for the Terra Science Fair, but Reeft kept eating all of our lava." Axin's eyes widened.

    "Didn't that hurt?" The droid laughed.

    "No. It was only muja-flavored gelatin." Axin relaxed. "Unfortunately, we had had to add special food coloring so the lava would be the right color. Poor Reeft's tongue turned fluorescent pink!" Axin started giggling. So did Tebla and Obee-one. (Axin's laughs were notoriously infectious.) "He, his tongue actually started glowing just like the lava. Ha ha ha! He couldn't sleep for three days because he, ha ha , sleeps with his mouth open, ha, and the light kept waking him up!" Axin was nearly convulsing.

    "You're fibbing!" he accused, happily. Obee-one shook his head.

    "No, I'm not. You just haven't met Reeft." His mood grew solemn, but he tried not to let it show on his face. (And you mos
  8. Jaya Solo Jedi Grand Master

    Member Since:
    Jul 12, 1999
    star 5
    Yay. The forums are back up. I don't like the new look for now. I'll get used to it. Like I said in all my emails, wonderful post!
  9. JediKnight-Obi-Wan Force Ghost

    Member Since:
    Jan 13, 2000
    star 5
    Awww now thats a mean place to leave off. I'm VERY curious. What is this mailing list you all keep referring to? How does it work?
  10. Alli-Wan Jedi Knight

    Member Since:
    Dec 21, 1999
    star 3
    The "mailing list" refers to my practice of e-mailing out the posts when the server is down to whoever had replied back on this page or whoever requested had requested this "free-of-charge" service either on the thread or over email. If you would like to be on the "Jedi Dreams Emergency Fanfic Distribution List," email me at Bionerd77@aol.com, and I will send posts directly to you via e-mail whenever the boards are down, or refuse to let me log in, so you won't have to wait. Hopefully, this service will be less necessary in the future. ;) (finger's crossed.)

    In any case, here is a short post, as I have to get up early in the morning and learn how to make collagen gels and play with my cells.

    Enjoy, AWK


    ******

    I knew it. I knew I felt you coming, Jinn. Or rather, I felt your doom coming. So soon. So very, very soon. My grip is tightening on the dwindling moments of your life. A thrill goes through me. Is it that Force I've taken for myself, or is it just my natural delight? I don't care. Soon I will smell your blood. Does Jedi blood smell different? Do you bleed more red than mere mortals do? What do all those midi-chlorians do to your blood? What have they done to mine? I have them now, Jinn. Magic in a tube. How many more do I have then you?

    My team surrounds me. Too bad we lost Gantos. He was a fool, but at least he could give us numbers, odds. "Significance." Something we could throw in the face of the Senate. But on second thought, this is better. Nothing gets a point across so well as a good, old-fashioned demonstration. A ship blown out of hyperspace. A missing scientist and his wife suddenly found and killed. And a dead Jedi master and his dead Jedi apprentice. Dead, dead, DEAD. And so much more.

    And then I can relax, spend my time on lighter things as the galaxy recognizes our sudden power and the Senate begins to panic. It's been a long time since the Sith Wars, when the Jedi last had to battle without their precious Force advantage. When they didn't have a monopoly on them. Grown soft over the centuries? Too bad.

    They have no idea what they're up against.

    True, they know about the plasmid. They may have even studied it; breaking their precious Senate's laws to save their own necks. But it won't help them, . . . because it is too late. Already taken, already in the blood, already in the genes. And I'm sure your Jedi Code won't let you take it yourselves. Besides, how many more midi-chlorians could you possibly get?

    But for now, other matters to think of. Such as what will be the name of my new ship? And how will I kill you Guff? Maybe I really should kill you quickly; after all, you did find your successor for me, you loyal dimwit. But you know I won't. Too much fun the other way.

    What do I know about you Guff? What can I do to destroy you? I know you are loyal; I'll definitely have to kill the Wookie first. I know your skull's been cracked; I'll have to go easy on that lumpy little head of yours. Don't want it to be over too quickly. I know--

    But wait, this isn't about you. It's about me. About my time to enjoy myself. About enacting revenge for a the little things you do that annoy me. It's dangerous to annoy me Guff. Almost as dangerous as it is to entertain me. Either way, you end up dead sooner or later. A dead assistant, and a dead Jedi.

    This will be a day to remember.

    And Guff, before it's over, I will never have to listen to your stuttering again.
  11. Alli-Wan Jedi Knight

    Member Since:
    Dec 21, 1999
    star 3
  12. mouse2 Jedi Master

    Member Since:
    Oct 29, 1999
    star 4
    Another great post from Alli-Wan!

    Please post more soon. The tension is getting to me. I must know what happens next!
  13. Alli-Wan Jedi Knight

    Member Since:
    Dec 21, 1999
    star 3
    Gosh, even I'm starting to wish I'd stop writing these little posts and get on with it. Sorry, I'm still trying to figure it all out. :) I thank you all for your patience.

    Enjoy!

    (Actually, prepare to be confused.) ;)

    --AWK

    *********

    Sleep. Sweet sleep. Sleep now. That's what he told her to do. Sleep now.

    Annoying little boy he is, always telling her to do things. Reminding her of things. He doesn't talk about the Bad Things like the big man does, but he talks about Less Bad Things. Not Bad, but Things She Doesn't Want to Think About Things. Why does he keep doing that? What doesn't she want to think about?

    He told her she promised. She did promise, but he wasn't there. How does he know? What did she promise?

    He told her the big man can save her. Save her from what? The Bad Things?

    And what Bad Things? There are no Bad Things here.

    There isn't much of anything here.

    He told her to go here. 'Sleep now,' he said, and she had obeyed like a small pup. Why does she listen to him like that? He's just a little boy, too little to do anything about . . about what? What would he have to do anything about?

    Oh well, he must be a smart boy, even if there isn't anything he could possibly do if . . if what? If the sun stopped rising? If the milk went sour? If . . . ? If a Bad Thing happened? No, there are no Bad Things here. He wouldn't send her to a place with Bad Things because he is here to protect me. . .

    ?

    That didn't make sense.

    No matter. This place is very nice. Yes, he sent her to a very nice place. It's warm, and safe and gentle. Comfort in the ground, happiness in the wind, protection in the sunlight. Yes, protection . . but that's silly. What would she need protection from here? Here where it's safe?

    Voices. So far away, happy voices. Laughing very hard. Children and a woman. A mama? Was she a mama? No, she can't be a mama. My children would never be safe.

    What?

    This is a very confusing place. But it's still very nice.

    The sky is blue and the sunlight is yellow and the grass is green and the clouds are pink. Must be sunset, but can't see the sun. Must not be in the yard. Her yard is near the kelp field, and the sets in one corner of it and the ground is all flat and she can watch the sun slip below the horizon bit by bit as it paints the sky in ways I always tried to capture but never could.

    Well, it's hard to paint a sunset when you're not a sun. And when you've never seen one really well. All those buildings in the way.

    What buildings in the way?

    There are no buildings . . . here . . .

    Someone's here. Who's here?

    Tebla? Tebla, what are you doing here?

    Did you come to watch her too? Where'd she go? Don't know. No matter.

    Where did the grass go? Now I'm on the grass-couch. Green grass couch.

    What are you saying, Tebla? You're going to get the boy? Don't. I don't want to see him. He's too bossy. But he did tell me to go to that nice place. Where are you going Tebla?

    You'll be back? Yes, right back.

    More voices. Happy voices?

    NO! NO! BAD VOICES! I KNOW THAT VOICE!

    I!!! I KNOW THAT VOICE!!!

    Voice gone.

    Pounding! Pounding! Stop the pounding!

    Voices! Scared voices. So scared. She was scared too. Tell them to go to the nice place Little Boy. They won't be scared there.

    Silent.

    What are you doing here Little Boy?

    Did you tell them to go there?

    "It isn't time to wake up yet."

    It isn't time to wake up yet.

    "You should go back to sleep."

    I should go back to sleep. She should too.

    The couch is grass again. Back at the nice place. Why do I keep listening to you, Little Boy?

    "You are very tired. You must go to sleep."

    Do you hear that? She does. We are very tired, and we must go back to sleep.

    The sky is blue and the sunlight is yellow and the grass is green and the clouds are pink.
  14. Alli-Wan Jedi Knight

    Member Since:
    Dec 21, 1999
    star 3
    Anybody out there? Sorry I wasn't in last night, but I had to clean my bathroom. Sad, isn't it? In any case, I'm just popping this up so I can find it later tonight. Will try to be back then. ;) --AWK
  15. JediKnight-Obi-Wan Force Ghost

    Member Since:
    Jan 13, 2000
    star 5
    Yes, listen to the sweet, cute, little boy. He knows best. :) LOL
    That wasn't too confusing Alli Wan. Can't wait for more. Is Obi-Wan going to be forced to defend them all in front of Axin and show that he IS a JEDI?
  16. Jaya Solo Jedi Grand Master

    Member Since:
    Jul 12, 1999
    star 5
    He's going to kill Guff? Why? I can picture Axin saying that Obi-Wan's lightsaber isn't pretty enough. Post soon!
  17. Alli-Wan Jedi Knight

    Member Since:
    Dec 21, 1999
    star 3
    Greetings. Sorry this isn't edited like it should be, but I need to go to bed, and I promised I'd post, so here it is. As for the speculation, can't tell you what Obi-Wan will do. (Not sure yet. ;) ), but the Boss is planning on killing Guff because Guff knows too much, he finds him annoying, and he want's Guff and Sinew's ship, "Serenity's Treehouse." Okay, long post to tide you over. Enjoy, and I hope there isn't too many mistakes. --AWK

    *******

    Evel started. (He's doing it again.) Making an attempt to center himself in hopes of tracking whatever it was that seemed to be bothering the master, Evel closed his eyes and began to breath deeply.

    (Whoa!) Something was out there! He could only perceive it faintly, but judging his own weak skills (which had been waning further in the years since he'd left the Temple) it must seem like a blaring siren to a Jedi as powerful in the Living Force as the great Master Jinn. But, . . . somehow Evel didn't think this was it. This couldn't be what was bothering him, what could be drawing his attention so suddenly. Even though he hadn't sensed it before, Evel was subtly aware that whatever he was feeling had been out there for some time, and had been building steadily. (Essence of Jedi.) That was just what I felt like too. Like a bunch of Jedi, but fainter, shielded. Evel shuddered. (Ignorance is not bliss. Complete and utter ignorance is bliss.) He knew just enough to be aware that he didn?t know how afraid he should be. And that frightened him.

    But 'essence' or not, whatever he had felt was not what had roused the master. More curious than confused, Evel trailed the giant to Ield's workbench. Whatever it had been, it must have been something sudden (judging by Jinn's reaction) and quick (judging from Jinn's rapid response), and would have to be sufficiently strong for the master to notice, but likely too weak or subtle for Evel to sense it himself. (Which basically boiled down to the fact that whatever it was, it could be quite strong and obvious anyway; he still might not have noticed, even if he were meditating if the master hadn't been there.)

    "Ield?" The scientist started as sharply as Evel had, and turned to the Jedi Master, fearful questions in his eyes. "Is there an empty room nearby?" Ield nodded and directed Qui-Gon to his office.

    "Is something wrong?" Reese came to stand next to Evel; both boys shuddered at the quavering quality in Ield's voice. "What's happened?" Master Jinn placed a calming hand on Ield's shoulder and smiled gently. (He smiles?)

    "I don't know, Ield. I don't know what had happened. My padawan is trying to tell me something, but it is difficult at this distance. I will let you know as soon as I can." With that said, Master Jinn went inside and closed the door firmly behind him. Ield watched worriedly through the window as the large man walked two paces in and settled into a meditative posture. (I don't like this. I don't like this at all.) Abruptly, he turned away from the door, only to come face to face with two young faces.

    Two very confused, and very curious young faces.

    "Ield," Reese proceeded very gently and carefully. "Did Master Jinn just say what I think he said?" Ield stared at the boys, now confused himself. He wasn't Force-trained, but he thought he had gotten the gist of it. Master Jinn had 'Forced' something from Oobble-Wim but his reception was fuzzy because the boy was so far away. Was he missing something obvious? Was the Jedi hiding something? Had these two picked up on something? Ield knew Jinn was an impeccably honorable man, but rumor had it he was not above some, . . . well, less than completely honest behavior when he felt it was in keeping with the greater good. The hairs on Ield's arms began to stand on end. (What isn't he telling me? What does he know that I don't know?) Everything, apparently. He blinked. The boys were expecting an answer.

    "If you heard him say that he will let me know as soon as he can, then you heard what I heard. Why? Is he lyin
  18. Lwyn`nya Kenobi Jedi Knight

    Member Since:
    Oct 19, 1999
    star 2
    *laughs herself out of the chair*

    EVIL and RUSE!!! *lol* I LOVE it!!! :) Sounds like quite the mischievous duo!! :) And what must Qui-Gon be thinking? Oh this is great stuff!!!! May this story NEVER end!!! :) . . . but may the posts be written FASTER!! :)
  19. mouse2 Jedi Master

    Member Since:
    Oct 29, 1999
    star 4
    Wonderful!

    Towards the end I started to force myself to read faster so I could find out when they figured out who Jinn's Padawan was.

    Please give us more Alli-Wan! I love it!
  20. Jedi Gryph Grin Jedi Master

    Member Since:
    Sep 25, 1999
    star 4
    Oh Alli-Wan! That post was inspired!!! I laughed until I had tears in my eyes. This is such a great story, I can hardly wait for more.
  21. Bastet Jedi Master

    Member Since:
    Dec 30, 1999
    star 4
    Hahahahahahaha! That was so funny! I love this story!!!!!!!! Oobley-Wen. Hahaha! More soon please! :)
  22. Jaya Solo Jedi Grand Master

    Member Since:
    Jul 12, 1999
    star 5
    Great post! It was about time they figured out who his padawan was. Wonder when Axin will figure it out. :) (Save the smileys!)
  23. Jedi Igraine Jedi Knight

    Member Since:
    Dec 20, 1999
    star 1
    Great job Alli-Wan. What a neat surprise to come home from vacation and find all these wonderful posts waiting for me both on my computer and online her.

    Igraine
  24. Alli-Wan Jedi Knight

    Member Since:
    Dec 21, 1999
    star 3
    Greetings! Happy Independence Day to everyone in the US who celebrates it (and happy plain old ordinary day to everyone who doesn't or lives elsewhere. ;) ) Another post. Glad you all liked the last post. Here's another. Hope you didn't feel like the wait was too long. ;) Hope it was worth it. Enjoy. --AWK

    PS. Hope I edited this one better than the last one. Eeep.

    *******

    "She's sleeping again."

    "Are you alright?" Tebla was beginning to wonder if she was turning into a nurse, or a broken holoprojector. Obi-Wan tried to look reassuring and waved her away gently when she moved to pry herself from Ev's grasp to help him to the table. He didn't look like he needed help, but after the last time . . .

    "I'm fine. It was much easier to put her to sleep this time. Actually, all I had to do was convince her to put herself to sleep." Tebla nodded.

    "Will she be alright?" The boy nodded.

    "So long as she doesn't wake up at the wrong time, she should be. But we must move quickly. I don't know how long she will stay asleep." He turned to the soiled, sweaty boy sitting on a towel-clad chair, considering him. "Are you alright?"

    "I didn't mean for this to happen!" Obi-Wan's eyes flicked to Tebla's. She shrugged helplessly; that same statement had been the only information she had been able to glean from him. (At least I got him to sit on the towels.) Obi-Wan frowned, looking around quickly. He sensed time was waning, but the Force was telling him to stop. To listen to this boy. He really wanted to leave, but there was danger out there, and he didn't know how to avoid it. And something about this boy's desperate face told him he'd better find out what it was he didn't want to have happened. But first he had to calm the boy down. (And not into a coma!) Pouring the boy a glass of water, he sat in the opposite chair.

    "What didn't you want to happen, . . " He glanced at Tebla, hoping she knew this boy.

    "Ev."

    "What didn't you want to happen, Ev?"

    "I-I-I just wanted to get you back. And to get Axin back! And to get back at HIM! Because I looked stupid! And it made me feel stupid! And I didn't want to feel stupid anymore!" Obi-Wan nodded. (I didn't want that to happen either. I just didn't want him to push Axin around.)

    "Nobody likes to feel stupid. Who else made you feel stupid, Ev?" The Force was giving Obi-Wan a pretty good idea of what had happened, but he had to know how much this boy told him. And where they were now. He couldn't sense any imminent danger (the wood wolves weren't likely scratching at the door just yet) but 'hard to see the Dark Side is', and he was hardly a master.

    "A man! A big man, with, . . with blasters and grenades and, . . . and BLASTERS!" Ev had never seen a real blaster before. Projectile weapons, yes, blasters, no. "He, he was asking about Jedi, and where he could find them, and I was mad at you and mad at Axin and I told him!" Ev gulped the water, and Obi-Wan tried to decide which question to ask next. (What would Qui-Gon ask?) His master was much better at this sort of thing, using the Living Force to judge a person's mood, and using his instincts to ask the proper leading questions, sometimes with just a touch of the Force. (What is his mood?) Well that was obvious: panic and guilt. Finding the best method to calm the boy was less so.

    "What did you tell him, Ev?" Obi-Wan kept using his name. He had noticed Qui-Gon would often use a person's name when he was trying to reason with the hysterical. Of course, Qui-Gon also used the Force, but Obi-Wan felt he really couldn't spend his energies so freely right now. He didn't think Ev would be as difficult to calm as Zelle, but his control wasn't nearly as good as his master's, and he didn't want to think about what would happen if they were suddenly attacked while there were two people with Force-induced comas in the house and he was passed out cold on the floor. He would just have to calm Ev down by less direct means.

    "I, I told him Axin was a great Jedi ma
  25. mouse2 Jedi Master

    Member Since:
    Oct 29, 1999
    star 4
    Yes, Alli-Wan that was definately worth the wait! Please don't make us wait too long for the next one. Although if waiting gives us posts like that I don't mind a little wait.

    Poor Axin! Having to sort socks. Yes my dear Axin it is boring!
Thread Status:
Not open for further replies.