Before Jedi Snapshots *New story 15/06/06* 'These Boots Were Made For Walking'

Discussion in 'Fan Fiction- Before, Saga, and Beyond' started by Jemmiah, Mar 17, 2003.

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  1. Jemmiah Jedi Grand Master

    Member Since:
    Mar 5, 2000
    star 5
    The original snapshot thread got very large indeed - and contained a mix of JA and 'during the saga' snapshots. I guess I'll repost the pre-saga ones, although I'm hoping this thread will be mainly for new snapshots once the bunnies bite!)

    ***********

    TITLE: Food for Thought
    Author: Jemmiah
    Era: JA
    Characters: Obi-Wan, Qui-Gon, Padawan Tanni Welasa and Master Vernice Ashdal.
    Summary: When hunger takes control Obi-Wan decides to do a little late night fridge-raiding.

    ***


    "Are you sure we should be doing this?" hissed Obi-Wan, furtively looking around the shiny chrome surfaces and polished worktops.

    "It was your idea! What do you mean are you sure we should be doing this?" The Togorian's reply came back in the form of an indignant growl, issued by felineoid vocal chords. Padawan Tanni Welasa was an intelligent, loyal individual - but as was so characteristic of his species did not suffer fools gladly. There was no time to argue over who was to blame: all that anyone needed to know was that it was all Obi-Wan's fault! As he ducked beneath a large metal ladle, Tanni cast an annoyed look at his companion.

    Kenobi was a good friend, but a little headstrong. It HAD been Obi-Wan's idea to go snooping about the place regardless of what he said - against his master's wishes - but now that they were actually in the thick of things the padawan appeared to have lost all of his nerve, and that irked Tanni tremendously. In his book, you either did a thing wholeheartedly or you did not do it at all. So far, during their early exploration of the darkened room, Obi-Wan had spent a surprising amount of time skulking in the shadows just a few steps behind Tanni's silver striped tail?

    Obi-Wan stopped beside what looked like some kind of colander for draining vegetables.

    "It seemed like a good idea at the time." He ventured timidly.

    "But now you've remembered what your master will say to you when he finds out you've been sneaking about inspite of all his warnings, yes?" Tanni rumbled, instinctively flexing his claws. He wasn't really in a position to insult Obi-Wan, for there was little doubt that his own master Vernice Ashdal would be every bit as severe on him as Master Jinn would be on his apprentice. "What can I say? Maybe you should have thought of that before you dragged me along for the ride. One of these days Obi-Wan, your penchant for spying will get you into serious trouble?"

    "I am NOT spying!" Obi-Wan's voice became heated, and even although the room remained darkened save for the glow of Tanni's green lightsabre, the Togorian could see the disgust radiating from his friend's eyes. "How is this spying? I'm just trying to help everyone! Is it my fault that we arrived on this planet during a week of national fasting?"

    Tanni felt his insides begin to rumble at Obi-Wan's timely reminder of their predicament, and willed his innards to compress and stifle the noise. The problem had been exactly as Obi-Wan described: there was no food to be had! Four days of living on ration bars had left Tanni believing that his beautiful coat would start to shed through a combination of stress and lack of nutrition. He was a carnivore! That meant that he had to eat meat at regular intervals or else his body would start to lose its natural abundance of springy energy! He'd even started to wonder what Obi-Wan might taste like with a little bit of seasoning and perhaps a caramelised Papyri fruit stuck in his mouth, surrounded by a bed of wild rice and sea truffles?

    "Sorry." He muttered, his whiskers drooping. "You are right, of course. Although I cannot help but feel the jedi council might have advised us as to the situation on this planet! We might have brought more rations with us..."

    Obi-Wan nodded, and straightened up, narrowly avoiding hitting his head off a low-hanging frying pan.

    "I'm surprised my master hasn't considered this already." He gestured around the eerily empty room. "I've no idea why he was so adamant that we keep to our rooms."

    "Well, at least the fasting stops tomorrow." Tanni smiled
  2. KenobisGirl Jedi Master

    Member Since:
    Jul 10, 2001
    star 4
    LOL! That was very funny! [face_laugh]

    Nice job!
  3. mouse2 Jedi Master

    Member Since:
    Oct 29, 1999
    star 4
    Tee-Hee!

    It sure is hard to eat when your food fights back, isn't it Obi??

    Hmmmm... New snapshots... Is that a hint?? ;)
  4. Jemmiah Jedi Grand Master

    Member Since:
    Mar 5, 2000
    star 5
    Title: If you can't stand the heat?
    Author: Jemmiah
    Characters: Obi-Wan, Qui-Gon Jinn
    Timescale: Obi-Wan is 14
    Summary: Ever had one of those days when nobody will listen to you?

    ***************


    "Now, please pay attention to my lead, young Obi-Wan. It would not do to become separated in a place such as this."

    Qui-Gon pulled his robe closer to him even though the sun was beating down overhead. The market place was bustling with life, different species of creatures and sentient beings, with all the sounds and smells that accompanied such places. Rug makers, ornamental candle sellers, glass blowers, jugglers, acrobats, pickpockets?it was as if every corner of the galaxy had been represented within the narrow market place and teeming streets. You couldn't step three yards without having someone trying to sell you some kind of weird, exotic fruit or an exquisitely embroidered shirt?

    "I always pay attention." Obi-Wan found himself becoming more and more disgruntled with his lot in life. He hated the burning sun. He hated dust. He wanted to be back on Coruscant where he had his own very serviceable bed and a clean change of clothing. He missed Jemmy. At the back of his mind Obi-Wan wondered how she was getting along in the care of G'emela Lothric, Qui-Gon's first padawan. He'd never met the woman but by all accounts she could be a bit on the overbearing side, and something told him that Jemmiah was not the kind of person who would appreciate that.

    "You sometimes lack focus." Counted Qui-Gon, waving his hand in the face of someone trying to sell him a newly crafted lucky Nargot shoe. "No, thank you very much."

    "It is for luck." The old man smiled toothily back at him.

    "Thanks again, but I am in rather a hurry. If I ever own a one legged Nargot you'll be the first person I think of, I promise."

    Even although he didn't actually tug Obi-Wan away by the sleeve, the fourteen-year-old padawan felt the request to move through their bond just as insistently as if it had been a physical command. Sighing, Obi-Wan took great care as they moved past the brazier where the old man had been heating the metal for the Nargot shoes.

    "Wasn't that a bit?" he hedged for a moment, "?impolite, master?" he suggested respectfully, trying to catch up with his master's long stride.

    "Padawan, you will learn in time that the difference between being rude and being decisive can be very thin indeed. In this instance I believe it to be necessary. If we stop and buy everything we have offered to us then we will be both exceedingly poor and also?" he grabbed hold of Obi-Wan's robe and this time literally dragged him along past the next booth, where five rather garishly painted females of varying shapes and species were stood, smiling and winking lustfully. It became patently obvious what they were trying to sell - and it was not the sort of thing Qui-Gon wanted Obi-Wan to experience?

    "Master?" Obi-Wan began to say something.

    "Come along." Qui-Gon hastened the boy straight past the Twi'lek female before she could do anything but coyly twitch her lekku at him. "You would do well to observe me in this type of situation. I have been to a lot more places of this nature and seen a lot strange things?"

    "Are we talking about the planet or the Twi'lek, master?" wondered Obi-Wan with a dry little smile.

    "I shall ignore that remark because I know that you are still in a foul mood from that little 'dispute' that we had yesterday evening, and you are deliberately trying to exasperate me with your behavior." Qui-Gon actually smiled at him and Obi-Wan eyed his master with suspicion. "But what I am saying is perfectly grounded in truth. I have experience in this kind of subterfuge."

    "Yes master." Nodded Obi-Wan.

    "And you do have an unfortunate tendency on occasions to dwell on possibilities far in the future."

    "Yes master."

    "What is important is focusing on what is going on all around you."

    Qui-Gon patted the teenager on the shoulder to show that there were no hard feelings. What Obi-Wan suffered from most was impe
  5. Jemmiah Jedi Grand Master

    Member Since:
    Mar 5, 2000
    star 5
    Title: The Master Plan
    Author: Jemmiah
    Characters: Obi-Wan, Qui-Gon, Jemmiah Gleshan
    Timescale: Obi-Wan is 14/15
    Summary: What happens when a padawan dares to challenge his master's rule?

    ******

    "Master, that's not fair."

    "You have to learn some discipline."

    "But I am disciplined."

    "Not enough, it would seem. Where's that Geography assignment I asked for?"

    "Well?"

    "Have you finished it?"

    "Not exactly." Obi-Wan replied sullenly, fixing Qui-Gon with an openly rebellious look.

    "And why is it not finished?"

    Obi-Wan sighed. There would be no point in lying because Qui-Gon would read him like an open book.

    "I wanted to sit out in the gardens. It was such a lovely evening and?"

    "You decided that chatting with Simeon Cates and Zak V'Aladee was of more importance."

    "Not more important. I just felt I had to?" Obi-Wan's voice trailed off. "I'm not winning, am I master?" He mumbled ruefully.

    Qui-Gon straightened up. "You're too old for physical discipline, so I am going to teach you a lesson you will remember. That trip to the amusement park?"

    "M-master?" Obi-Wan stammered.

    "Guess what. CANCELLED." Qui-Gon smiled at his padawan. "It might teach you to prioritize in future."

    "But master," Obi-Wan protested as Qui-Gon walked towards the refrigeration unit, "That's not fair!"

    "Are you questioning my judgement?" Jinn replied with a glint in his eye that told the apprentice to back down a little.

    "No?not really. But there must be some times when you are wrong. I mean, even a Jedi can't be right all the time."

    Qui-Gon regarded the misery on his padawan's face. Maybe the punishment was a little severe but the boy had to learn. He was fifteen years of age and mostly well-behaved and studious, but recently Qui-Gon had felt the need to draw attention to Obi-Wan's wavering attention span.

    He was hitting that age. The one that caused hormones to rage out of control. Qui-Gon remembered it all to well himself?

    "Nobody is perfect, Obi-Wan. Not even myself. On a few rare occasions I have been known to make mistakes."

    "Well, no disrespect intended master, but I think this may be one of them."

    Qui-Gon was about to open his mouth when he became aware of another presence in the room.

    "Master Jinn is ALWAYS right, aren't you?" Jemmiah grinned at Qui-Gon. "Do you really think you could do any better?"

    Obi-Wan frowned at the Corellian girl. She was normally his staunchest ally in all matters and to see her back up Qui-Gon in this way left Obi-Wan feeling strangely vulnerable.

    Until he saw her slow wink.

    "Er?yes." Obi-Wan said suddenly, talking Qui-Gon by surprise. "I think so. I'd be a really good master."

    "Sounds like a challenge, Master Jinn," Jemmiah walked over and held onto Qui-Gon's arm, "so why don't you take him up on it?"

    "Pardon?" Jinn wondered if he'd heard right.

    "Swap roles for a day. See who copes with it better. Obi-Wan can be the master and you can be the padawan again."

    Qui-Gon was astonished at the suggestion but it did present him with the perfect opportunity to show Obi-Wan what hard work and discipline really was. If he were a betting man he would take odds at his padawan getting down on his knees before the afternoon was over and begging forgiveness. The idea was very tempting?

    Jemmiah watched as Qui-Gon's thoughts were relayed to her by a series of subtle facial gestures. He was thinking just how easy this would be.

    He obviously hadn't put her in the equation at all.

    "Very well. I accept." He reached out a hand to shake on the deal, which Obi-Wan took suspiciously. His master looked altogether too confident.

    He hoped Jemmiah knew what she was doing.

    "Maybe we'll all learn something from this." Jemmy smiled impishly.

    ******************************

    "What in blazes do you think you are doing?" Qui-Gon ran through to the living area, bleary-eyed. The thump-thump-thump of some sort of modern music had woken him up from what had been a very pleasant dream. He'd been recollecting the time when he and Dex had bought Mace
  6. Healer_Leona Manager Emeritus

    Member Since:
    Jul 7, 2000
    star 9
    A fresh look at my fave snapshots! Yay!!!
  7. Jemmiah Jedi Grand Master

    Member Since:
    Mar 5, 2000
    star 5
    Title: Sleepless in Coruscant
    Author: Jemmiah
    Timeframe: J/A, Obi-Wan is 17
    Characters: Obi-Wan, Bant, Dimallie Melbra
    Genre: Humor
    Keywords: Infirmary
    Summary: Whilst languishing in the infirmary Obi-Wan finds it very, VERY difficult to sleep, much to the distress if his friends!

    **********


    "I can't sleep!"

    Dimallie watched the miserable patient before her as he tried his best to toss and turn (in as much as he could with his leg hanging up in a suspended sling) so that he might make himself more comfortable. She'd had the report earlier that day from Bant, which had confirmed one thing she'd already known deep in her heart:

    Obi-Wan Kenobi was NOT a good patient.

    "Your mind is too lively." Dimallie smiled sympathetically. "Perhaps if you were to meditate on higher things?"

    "The only thing that is higher than my head is my leg." Obi-Wan scowled, nodding ungratefully at his hoisted limb. "Can't you lower it a little?"

    "Well, I'm not supposed to." Dimallie answered apologetically. "You see, it's like that to stop your leg from swelling and we wouldn't want that to happen, would we?"

    "No." Obi-Wan agreed stiffly. "We wouldn't. But what about my lack of sleep? I've been stuck like this for a whole day!"

    Dimallie regarded the morose padawan for a moment, at a loss for what to say.

    "All I can do is ask An-Paj about giving you more pain meds." She shrugged ineffectively. "But I can give you another blanket."

    "Di, I don't need another blanket. I need sleep!" Obi-Wan tried to get through to the apprentice healer.

    "Maybe you're cold?"

    "I think I'm the best judge of that?and yes, I am cold. But that has nothing to do with it!" Obi-Wan declared. "All that's wrong with me other than the broken leg is the lack of sleep?"

    But Dimallie had already gone on her quest to locate another blanket for Obi-Wan.

    *******

    And so it continued for the following twelve hours. Obi-Wan sat and complained about the fact that he couldn't sleep almost every time Dimallie or Bant or Simeon were in earshot in the hope that somehow there would be someone who could do something about it. The healers were going out of their way to be accommodating but they weren't able to help him! Every time he used the words 'sleep' and 'I can't' in the same sentence, all he got was another blanket thrown onto his bed! Soon Obi-Wan was being treated to a brand new phenomenon in the temple infirmary: actually feeling warm!

    Or perhaps Dimallie was hoping that it was a case of out of sight, out of mind. One thing was for certain, if any more blankets were placed over him he wouldn't be able to see his leg any more.

    He WAS a bad patient and he knew it. His mind WAS too lively. He had far too much in the way of restless energy at the best of times. Usually he could burn it off in the training rooms but for the moment he was stuck sweltering under a mountain of blankets, his mind refusing to be quiet.

    He'd been unceremoniously dropped by Sheria, the young lady padawan he'd considered as a sort of unoficial girlfriend, and that had done his ego no good at all. He'd been teased by Jemmiah, even though she'd made up for it by sneaking in some contraband chocolate which, alas, he'd forgotten about and had melted under his pillow. That was just a continuation of his Sithly luck in general and the ghastly infirmary in particular.

    Worse still, Qui-Gon and Master Berlingside had gone on a mission and had left both himself and Kryztan behind. The man hadn't said what kind of assignment, but Obi-Wan got the impression it was probably a mission to see who could empty a cantina of all its alcohol quickest of all. Once a year without fail, Dex and Qui-Gon found themselves on one of these 'tasks' for the council, which was rendered all the more suspicious by the fact that invariably Master Windu always managed to disappear at exactly the same time.

    Two years in a row could be coincidence. Six was not.

    "I need a night-cap." Obi-Wan announced. "That would get me to sleep. After all, if it's good enough for my master then i
  8. JediClare Jedi Master

    Member Since:
    Oct 8, 2001
    star 4
    "It looks like dinner's on me..."


    "Your robe's on fire."


    "This," Obi-Wan held up the item of headwear with the fluffy white pom-pom at the end, "is not exactly what I had in mind."

    [face_laugh] [face_laugh]

    "Good job." ;)
  9. Jemmiah Jedi Grand Master

    Member Since:
    Mar 5, 2000
    star 5
    Title: Sticky Moments
    Author: Jemmiah
    Timeframe: J/A, Obi-Wan is 20
    Characters: Obi-Wan, Qui-Gon Jinn
    Genre: Humor, hurt (with little comfort!)
    Summary: A hair-raising situation for Obi-Wan and Qui-Gon.

    *******


    Obi-Wan had never known pain like it.

    For what seemed like the thousandth time in the last five minutes his mind screamed in complete agony. It ripped through him; burning and searing like a red-hot flame. The heat radiated off his skin. And just when he thought he?d recovered sufficiently, dampening the residual needle-like sensation with the force, the torture would begin again.

    He didn?t know how much more he could take.

    At twenty years of age, Obi-Wan was in good physical shape. He had perfect musculature and was extremely fit; every one at the temple had said so. Even his torturer seemed to eye him appraisingly. But now he felt he was nearing the end of his tether. And as for his master?

    Qui-Gon was over thirty years older than his padawan, although he too was in excellent condition. But there were few occasions when he?d ever felt so tempted to give in to the darkside as he did now. The intensity and severity of the pain that lashed him was almost intolerable. He watched the well practiced hands descend upon his bare torso, and gritted his teeth.

    ?Sithspit!!!? He yelled.

    Obi-Wan gulped, turning his head round to face his beleaguered master who lay next to him.

    ?I can?t stand this.? Qui-Gon whispered, his face ashen. ?This is beyond agony.?

    ?I...I know, master. But we have to be strong.? Kenobi?s resolve began to crumble when he saw that it was his turn once more.

    ?It?s excruciating!?

    Obi-Wan nodded. ?I don?t understand how any being should be subjected to this indignity.?

    He watched and waited for the torture to begin again. The hands came down upon his chest, and there was a sickening, tearing sound. Kenobi thought he saw black spots appearing before his eyes.

    ?Hang on, Obi-Wan. We?ll get through this. We must.? Qui-Gon reached his hand out and laid it on his padawans' shoulder. Obi-Wan flinched. His skin felt as if it were being flayed and stabbed all at the same time. It was bad enough that he should suffer this torment, but to have to watch Qui-Gon go through it too was unbearable.

    ?Whoever thought this up has a sick and depraved mind.? Qui-Gon shouted, and then wished he hadn?t.

    His turn again.

    The swift, wrenching sound was almost as bad as the pain that accompanied it. Jinn felt as if he were going to throw up. ?You don?t really need both of us,? he said hoarsely, ?If you must torture someone then let it be me, but don?t make Obi-Wan suffer with me.?

    ?No, master.? Kenobi felt his strength bolstered by the courage of the man beside him. ?If you can endure it, so can I. Let there be no more talk of this kind. I shall not leave you to suffer alone. I will not have it.? Tears formed in his eyes.

    ?My brave padawan.? Qui-Gon murmured proudly, before facing his captor once more. ?Do you worst.?

    The torturer raised an eyebrow.

    Oh, Sith. Qui-Gon watched as the hands returned to the stricken body of his apprentice. The familiar wrenching sound was this time accompanied by a shriek.

    ?I take it back!? Obi-Wan yelled. ?Torture him instead, just leave me alone!?

    ?Padawan!?

    ?I?m sorry master,? he whimpered. ?Even a Jedi has his limits.?

    ?Fine.? Qui-Gon snapped. ?But just remember that this is absolutely the LAST time I ever let Jemmiah give me an all-over body wax to raise funds for the Temple.?

    Jemmiah smiled as she reached for another strip.

    ?You think this is bad?? She grinned deviously. ?I can assure you that it?s downhill all the way from here!?


  10. Healer_Leona Manager Emeritus

    Member Since:
    Jul 7, 2000
    star 9
    ?You think this is bad?? She grinned deviously. ?I can assure you that it?s downhill all the way from here!? --Would you believe I didn't get that the first itme around.... well Dah!!! *snicker, chuckle* :D :D
  11. Jemmiah Jedi Grand Master

    Member Since:
    Mar 5, 2000
    star 5
    Title: Ben
    Author: Jemmiah
    Timeframe: J/A, Obi-Wan is 14
    Characters: Obi-Wan, Qui-Gon Jinn, Jemmiah Gleshan
    Genre: Humor
    Summary: An ancient Corellian festival proves quite troublesome for Obi-Wan and Qui-Gon!

    **********

    "I don't like this place." Jemmiah scuffed her feet off the seat in the waiting room.

    "I don't much care for it either." Qui-Gon replied. "But I'm afraid it's for your own good. An-Paj will be able to tell us if you can stop the medication at long last."

    "I didn't like that much, either." The ten-year-old pulled a face. "Those tablets were horrible. We're talking major yuck!"

    "I appreciate that. That's why I had to prise your mouth open in order to get you to swallow them."

    "Probably rat poison." She folded her thin arms.

    Something about that statement gave Qui-Gon the shivers for no reason that he could put his finger on. The Jedi master shook his head.

    "Let's just hope all that torment is about to come to an end."

    "Thanks." Jemmy smiled.

    "Not for you, for me." Qui-Gon replied watching as Dex Berlingside made his way out of a side room with a scowling padawan in tow.

    "He looks happy." Jinn mumbled sarcastically as the blonde young man rubbed his arm in irritation.

    "Who does?"

    Qui-Gon nodded at the couple as they made their way over towards them.

    "You've not met Master Berlingside's apprentice, have you?" he mused. "That is padawan Kryztan Harkley."

    Jemmiah regarded him silently as the teenager ran his unharmed hand through his close cut golden hair. A slight smile crawled onto her lips, one that Qui-Gon mistook for something else entirely.

    "He tends to have that effect on the young females in the temple." He remarked casually. "It was the same with his master."

    "Effect?" Jemmiah puzzled. "He doesn't have any kind of effect on me. Looks like he fancies himself too much, anyhow."

    "You've not even met him." Qui-Gon chided gently.

    "Am I wrong?"

    Qui-Gon thought about it for a moment.

    "No." he said eventually.

    "There, you see! And anyhow he is far too pretty. A man should look like a man. That's what Nadine used to say. And she saw plenty of men so she should know what she was?"

    "Why don't we say hello." Qui-Gon nudged her, anxious to change the topic.

    Jemmy shrugged.

    "Qui-Gon!" Dex hailed his friend lazily. "No rouge today? No curlers?"

    "Very amusing." Jinn grimaced.

    "What a pity." Berlingside placed a hand on his padawan's shoulder. "I thought it added a little something."

    "Did you have something in particular to say, is that why you are here?" Qui-Gon raised an eyebrow, enjoying the battle of words. "Or was it just to insult me?"

    "No reason, just the insult." Dex smiled breezily. "I've been taking this one to have his medical. Guess who had to have his inoculations for Florizan Influenza?"

    "That explains the sore arm." Qui-Gon turned to the pouting figure of Harkley. "How does it feel?"

    "Painful, sir." Muttered Kryztan. "Very, very painful."

    "Good." Dex grinned. "Why should you get away with it? When we were padawans things were just as bad. There wasn't any kindly Healer Xadaani in our day with her gentle touch."

    "Gentle?" Kryztan's eyes rolled. "Master, she stabbed me!"

    "You shouldn't have asked her if she was properly qualified to give injections to anything higher up the evolutionary scale than an orange." Dex tutted ruefully.

    "I think she'd been drinking." Kryztan put a hand to his injured arm.

    "Probably. It's the padawans that drive her to it." Jemmy supplied.

    Kryztan looked at her for the first time, somewhat hurt.

    "I'm a nice guy." He smiled confidently. "I can charm any female in the temple, isn't that right master?"

    "Anyone except healer Xadaani." Dex answered as the boy's face fell.

    "Well, there has to be something wrong with her." He boasted much to Qui-Gon's amusement.

    Harkley noticed Jemmiah was staring at him in a funny way.

    "What's the matter?"

    "You." The Corellian girl relied. "Your voice is all funny."

    Kryztan bristled.

    "It is not!"

    "Yes it
  12. Miana Kenobi Costuming & Props Mod - Retired Admin

    Manager
    Member Since:
    Apr 5, 2000
    star 8
    Yay! I finally get to read the snapshots and not have to go through hundreds of pages at a time! ;)

    LOL! to all of them. Especially the waxing one!!! [face_laugh]

    "Probably rat poison." She folded her thin arms.

    Something about that statement gave Qui-Gon the shivers for no reason that he could put his finger on.
    Ah... foreshadowing!!! (too bad I read TLST first!) ;)

    Great job!!
  13. Jemmiah Jedi Grand Master

    Member Since:
    Mar 5, 2000
    star 5
    Miana! Do you know, you're the first person I know of who actually picked up on that line! :) :D
  14. Miana Kenobi Costuming & Props Mod - Retired Admin

    Manager
    Member Since:
    Apr 5, 2000
    star 8
    LOL, serious? *feels special now* ;)
  15. Jemmiah Jedi Grand Master

    Member Since:
    Mar 5, 2000
    star 5
    Title: In The Hotseat
    Author: Jemmiah
    Timeframe: J/A
    Characters: Qui-Gon Jinn, Jemmiah Gleshan
    Genre: Humor
    Summary: Power struggles in the Jinn residence take an unusual turn.

    ********

    Four.

    The chrono on the wall said it was four. Qui-Gon?s stomach said it was at least two hours later than that. The truth of the matter was that he couldn?t be bothered to fix himself any food, and anyway, knowing who he was living with made the chances of there being any food left in the place rather remote.
    Sighing, he let his tall frame sink into the chair. HIS chair. The really comfortable one that molded itself around your body. The master?s chair.

    The one that everyone wanted to sit in.

    Recently it was becoming a power struggle to see who would get to sit in it. Usually he won. Obi-Wan tended to defer to his master anyway, but Jemmiah would occasionally make a run for it and get there before he did. Once, when she had considered herself to be safely in possession he had picked her up using the force and deposited her on the carpet.

    ?That?s not fair!? The ten-year-old had growled at him. ?You?re bigger than me!?

    ?Tangles, I promise you faithfully that when you are bigger than me, you can sit in the chair all you want.?

    She?d stalked off in disgust.

    Well, today was different. Today he deserved this rest in his comfortable seat. He?d spent the last seven hours teaching the initiates how to swim. Not an experience he was keen to repeat in a hurry; infact he would be quite pleased if he never set eyes on another child ever again?

    The door chime went.

    Groaning, Qui-Gon pushed himself out of the chair?s comfortable embrace and made his way to the door.

    ?Hi, Master Jinn!? beamed Jemmiah as the door slid back. Her eye quickly caught sight of the vacant seat at the same time that Qui-Gon realized what she was thinking.

    ?Oh, no you don?t!? Jinn raced her back to the chair and got there just hundredths of a second before she did. He threw himself back down with an extremely smug expression.

    ?Better luck next time, Tangles.? He smiled.

    She wore a hurt look. ?You?re supposed to let me win now and again.? She mumbled.

    ?Not a chance.? Qui-Gon shook his head. ?Humility is a very good lesson for a child. Just think of it as another part of your education. Talking of which,? he watched her walk into the kitchen area, ?how was school??

    ?Good.? She replied airily. ?We started this mural on the classroom wall.? Jemmy frowned suddenly in thought. ?Then the teacher came back in the room and we went back to drawing on the desks.?

    Qui-Gon folded his arms. ?Are you aware of the money that goes towards getting you an education?? He asked her.

    She spread her arms in a generous sweeping movement. ?That?s OK. They can take it back. I don?t want to go anyway?? She stopped when she saw his annoyance. ?Why don?t I find something to stuff my face with before I say something even more likely to get me murdered?? Her hand reached into the refrigeration unit and came away with something extremely chocolatey.

    ?Put that back!? He scolded. ?That is for after meals and not before??

    Too late.

    ?Mmmm!? Jemmy walked back through and perched on the edge of the dining table, swinging her legs back and forwards. ?This is REALLY good.? She said between mouthfuls of cream, chocolate and pastry.

    Qui-Gon looked at her. ?Is it?? He said under his breath. His stomach began to growl ominously.

    ?There?s another one in there.? She said before taking a second bite, pausing only to lick the cream off her fingers whilst watching him out the corner of her eye. ?My word, this is good!?

    ?You are an evil young lady.? Qui-Gon grumbled.

    ?Yes, but I?m an evil young lady with a double chocolate Corellian pastry!? She grinned at him.

    ?That?s not fair.? He said.

    ?Well, all you have to do is go over to the refrigeration unit and??

    ?Let you have my chair? I don?t think so.? He was adamant. Jemmiah shrugged and made a great show of enjoying the last few mouthfuls of cream.

    ?Oh, well. I ha
  16. Healer_Leona Manager Emeritus

    Member Since:
    Jul 7, 2000
    star 9
    This time around I caught the reference too!! I really think had Qui-Gon not wanted to get busted as Benbeau he should have omitted the bells!! :D :D

    And still love In the Hotseat
  17. Calamity Jinn Jedi Master

    Member Since:
    May 23, 2000
    star 4

    LOLOL!!!

    It's great to read these. You've definitely got the humour down to a Tee!

    More!! :D
  18. mouse2 Jedi Master

    Member Since:
    Oct 29, 1999
    star 4
    I love being able to go back and reread all of these! They're wonderful even the second, third and sometimes fourth time around! LOL!! :D
  19. Jemmiah Jedi Grand Master

    Member Since:
    Mar 5, 2000
    star 5
    And now for something completely different...

    TITLE: I name this child?
    AUTHOR: Jemmiah
    TIMESCALE: Pre-JA
    CHARACTERS: Master Atur Agrikka, Master Samir and a cameo appearance by a special guest! :)

    **************

    The clerk peered short-sightedly over her wire-framed ocular lenses at the two officials seated before her and attempted to strike a dignified, serious pose. And well she might: it wasn't every day that you handed a child over to any passing stranger! Disposing of children was a very solemn matter indeed! And where there was solemnity there was paperwork to go with it - which was where she fitted in to the equation.

    Perhaps it might be prudent to frown? It leant the occasion a certain gravitas - and also drew away from the fact that she could hardly see the flimsy sheet before her. Short sightedness didn't really come into it any more. The ocular frames were there because they gave her an air of authority, and because she'd once been told they suited her otherwise boring, plain featured face. In truth she could see little without them - but virtually nothing with them!

    The two blurry, fuzzy shaped individuals waited silently, not so much as stirring a muscle whilst waiting for the clerk to tie up the legalities. To her left sat a thin, mousy assistant: a woman with so tiny a voice that ears were forced to strain so as to catch the almost inaudible words. Large, headlamp eyes stared fixedly back at the would-be adoptees: she'd never been so close to real life jedi before. The fact that one of them was a towering Togorian with large, gleaming teeth only fuelled her natural nervousness?

    "Now?" The clerk stared at the piece of flimsy before her, bringing her head closer to the document so that she might see it better. "I, er?think that just about everything is in order. I need to record a few things first of all before it becomes legit, if you know what I mean. Er?" She cast about, looking about the desk surface in search of her missing stylus.

    "What things would these be?" The deep, resonant voice of the god-like Master Agrikka enquired politely, his blue eyes regarding her with a projected calmness he did not really feel.

    "Well, er?you know." The clerk let her spectacles drop towards the end of her nose so that she might see better. "Details. Circumstances. Information that your temple might want as regards your little bundle of joy." She furrowed her brow in the direction of the infant sleeping obliviously in Master Agrikka's arms, totally unaware of the decisions that were being made as to his future. "Margee?are you sucking the end of that stylus? How many times do I have to tell you? You wanna suck a stylus - go suck your own!"

    The Togorian's ears twitched in displeasure at the lazy, drawling Corellian accent, his long white whiskers flattening back against the sides of his cheeks. It had been a long mission, and a tedious one. Corellian's always seemed to cause unnecessary fuss! Never had Samir encountered such an infuriating people in his galaxy-wide travels! Always there were complications?always rules and regulations - some of them made up on the spur of the moment just to cause problems, so he thought. And if there were no complications then they were invented just so as to give the Corellians something to moan about! Because it seemed to Samir that Corellians were very good at inventing rules for others to follow but invariably useless at following them themselves?

    The feather-thin Margee returned the stylus, looking suitably chastised, dropping neatly in front of her colleague, making sure to wipe the end with her hand before she did so.

    "I'll bet it's got your teeth marls in it." The older woman peered fruitlessly at the stylus, holding it within her chubby hand. "I dunno?right, where were we?"

    "You tell me." Master Agrikka muttered under his breath.

    "Pardon?" The clerk cupped her hand to her ear.

    "Don't prolong the agony, Atur." Samir begged his fellow jedi with a shake of his head. "Let's just sign the form, grab the child and go!"

    Atur nodded his agre
  20. Miana Kenobi Costuming & Props Mod - Retired Admin

    Manager
    Member Since:
    Apr 5, 2000
    star 8
  21. JediClare Jedi Master

    Member Since:
    Oct 8, 2001
    star 4
    LOL! Docks Buildingsite, Dex Berlingside [face_laugh]!
  22. Healer_Leona Manager Emeritus

    Member Since:
    Jul 7, 2000
    star 9
    ROFLOL!!!! Does the man know this was how he was name???? That is absolutely hilarious!! Docks Buildingsite!!! [face_laugh] [face_laugh]
  23. mouse2 Jedi Master

    Member Since:
    Oct 29, 1999
    star 4
    What a stat to life! LOL!! Of course you know that if he could have talked, when the woman asked sex Dexy would have answered; "Yes please!" :D ;) :D

    A fabulous snapshot Jem!!!
  24. Jemmiah Jedi Grand Master

    Member Since:
    Mar 5, 2000
    star 5
    TITLE: See no weevil, hear no weevil, speak no weevil...
    AUTHOR: Jemmiah
    TIMESCALE: JA
    CHARACTERS: Qui-Gon Jinn, Jemmiah Gleshan, Dex Berlingside, Mace Windu.

    *****

    "I'm bored." Jemmy complained. "I'm very, very bored."

    Qui-Gon could tell that the moment she had finished her breakfast. How he dreaded school breaks! Jemmiah had sat on the chair by the table, restlessly kicking her legs about and scuffing her feet on the floor out of sheer idleness. The worst of it was he had another eight weeks of it to go before she went back to school! How was he going to occupy her mind for all that time? It was only day one and she was already set to pull the place to pieces through frustration?

    A frustrated Jemmiah usually meant a destructive one.

    "Can I do some more baking?" she begged him.

    "No!"

    "But whyyyyyy?" Jemmy plumped her face down on her wrist, tracing her name on the table surface with one finger.

    "Because."

    "Because what?"

    "Because I say so." Qui-Gon picked up the plates, aware of the scowling face that was shooting invisible knives into the back of his head as he walked away.

    "That's not a reason." The legs began to kick at the wall again, this time much more pronounced.

    "Tangles, you have to learn something." The master replied as he placed the mugs in the basin of water. "When I say because - that is all the answer you are going to get. Understand?"

    He felt rather pleased with himself for explaining the situation so well to her. Children were such hard work sometimes! It was vital that he continue to lay down the law incase Jemmiah forgot just exactly whose apartment she was living in. HE was the master. HIS rule was law.

    "No." Jemmy blinked at him. "I don't understand. Are you sure I can't do some baking? Not even a tiny little, teensy-weensy sponge cake?"

    "I don't wish to find all my teeth lying scattered all over the floor, with Ethan Inkerson trying to put them all back together with a tube of plasti-bond and a large and unpleasant looking syringe." Qui-Gon warned her that she was on shaky ground with a stern raise of his eyebrow. "I haven't forgotten what you did to that girl. Putting rocks in those cakes?"

    "That 'girl' put me in the infirmary." Jemmy reminded him pointedly. "I just wish I'd used a whole brick instead of pebbles!"

    "In that case the answer is a most definite and resounding no." Qui-Gon caught the ugly looking thunderous expression and raised his finger. "And I don't want you sulking either! Master Windu and Master Berlingside are coming round this afternoon to discuss something with me and I want you on your best behavior."

    "I AM on my best behavior!" Jemmy replied indignantly.

    Qui-Gon studied the belligerent face and sighed deeply.

    "Force help us." He muttered.

    *********

    He'd gone out for just a little while to speak with Evla, to see if he couldn't palm her off on the crèche master no doubt. Jemmiah knew she ought to make more of an effort to not cause waves but it was difficult sometimes?Obi-Wan was always competing with her for Qui-Gon's attention. She relented because she knew that the padawan had been there before her, and besides she was very fond of the rat-tailed young man but it was still difficult?

    She felt fairly certain that Qui-Gon was regretting taking her in.

    Well, if he wouldn't let her bake then Evla would! But did Evla have any flour? Did she have any of the right kind of sugar? Surely Qui-Gon wouldn't mind if she had a look in the storage bins? Where was that chair?ah, yes!

    She dragged the chair along, scrunching up her face as it made the most ear-rending screeching noise against the floor, until she got infront of the cupboard space up at the top of the wall - where she couldn't usually reach it. Qui-Gon had underestimated her determination this time! Jemmiah planted her feet carefully on the chair and opened the cupboard door, peering within the darkened space.

    Sugar?yes! There it was?and flour! There were two kinds there. One was the kind that you used in cakes and things, the one that she was
  25. mouse2 Jedi Master

    Member Since:
    Oct 29, 1999
    star 4
    C'mon Qui-Gon! You would have done the same thing if only you had thought of it first! ;)

    I know Dexy was impressed! :D :D
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