Before Jemmy's Diary: an observation of the galaxy, the Jedi and sundry other strange people! * 24/10/06*

Discussion in 'Fan Fiction- Before, Saga, and Beyond' started by Jemmiah, Jan 25, 2005.

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  1. mouse2 Jedi Master

    Member Since:
    Oct 29, 1999
    star 4
    But Simeon's a loveable idiot, right? ;)

    But I loved the fact that Dexy was there too! :D Hmmmm... having to learn an instrument that she doesn't want too... I can't wait to see hot G'emela handles that!

    Faboo post Jem!!
  2. DarthIshtar Chosen One

    Member Since:
    Mar 26, 2001
    star 9
    Of course this list doesn't apply to Quiggy, because he's not a man: he's a proper Jedi. So he doesn't count.

    And neither does Gethin because I really think he's pretty - and I'm a shallow kind of girl!


    Awww, well, around Gethin, I think we're all shallow kinds of girls!

    I love the buffoon being a musical instrument idea. As for the drooling thing, that's not just wind instruments--I started violin lessons when I was 3 and concentration was a very difficult thing for me to master. When I did concentrate, I would lose control of everything else and as a result, my violin teacher put a towel beneath me during each lesson so when I drooled in concentration, I wouldn't get her carpet wet.
  3. Healer_Leona Manager Emeritus

    Member Since:
    Jul 7, 2000
    star 9
    Sorry for not posting more regularly, I am indeed reading and enjoying more than I obviously say. :D :D

    Ferdi Xadaani (who eats the patients who don't make it through the night - allegedly


    That is too funny!! I can imagine what this humongo womann looks like to a kid the size of 10y/o Jemmiah. LOLOL
  4. Jemmiah Jedi Grand Master

    Member Since:
    Mar 5, 2000
    star 5
    ENTRY TWO HUNDRED AND THIRTY SEVEN:


    I sat at the side and watched Master J and Ben go through sabre practice in the training rooms this evening. Ben said it was just basic stuff but it looked pretty difficult to me! It's so?fast! Even with the force to guide them, how do they not make the occasional mistake? What's to stop them from accidentally taking a swing at each other and chopping off an arm or a foot? And they're not even really trying like it was a real fight or something, but it still looked pretty vicious to me!

    I don't usually accompany Quiggy or Ben for practice because I don't want to distract them or get in the way of important Jedi business, but on this occasion Quiggy seemed quite pleased, like he was glad I was taking an interest in what they did. I think he hoped that if I saw how easy it was to them and how good they were then it might stop me from worrying that Ben's going to come back with a hole in his guts, but if anything it had the opposite affect. This fighting business is dangerous! I know that nobody other than Jedi uses a lightsabre anymore so it's not likely they'll every have to fight blade against blade outwith the training rooms, but it's still awful to think about! I mean, would you send a man armed with a column of light to take on an army of destroyers? It would be like taking away somebody's blaster then asking them to defend themselves against a Reek with a peashooter!

    Lightsabres are scary. I think I want one!

    Well, okay?maybe just to borrow from time to time. Or to see what it feels like to hold one. I have no real ambition to play at being a Jedi and risk cutting my own head off with a mistimed swing. I was tempted to ask Quiggy (as Ben has already made it perfectly clear that he'd rather swallow his sabre than let me pick it up) if he would let me, under supervision, allow me just to switch one on for a few seconds - so I can imagine how it feels to wield one. I think he knew I wanted to ask him. I even think if I'd had the courage to ask then he'd have let me, but I didn't have the nerve. I could see Quiggy looking at me in the same curious way he often does, like he has a suspicion that I might go and do something silly behind his back.

    Which is true. Well, it would be stupid to do something silly in front of him when he could see me, wouldn't it?

    I had my last swimming lesson with Quiggy as well until - SEE? I SAID UNTIL, NOT IF - he comes back. I felt really sad about this as I think I'm slowly getting better at it. When I slide in the water I no longer feel as if I'm staring certain death in the face. I don't splash about so much now which means there's now more water left in the pool to swim in, rather than it jumping out when I jump in?

    I'm going to master swimming by the time that Quiggy and Ben come back. I will practice in the pool with the float every day. Then won't Master J get a shock when I cast aside the float and show him I can swim all on my own! I won't even need the force to support me anymore!

    ENTRY TWO HUNDRED AND THIRTY EIGHT:


    I should be used to saying goodbye to Ben and Quiggy, but it's made all the more difficult this time by the fact that according to Ben he's going to either a) not come back at all b) be shipped home in a casket or c) have a hole the size of a large wasps nest punched through his stomach. I don't find his smiling and 'will of the force' garbage at all comforting. There's a limit to how many times you can say 'there is no death, there is the force' without it losing some of its meaning?

    Still, at least this time I have one consolation. I'll be so busy worrying about Ben that I won't have time to worry myself sick over Quiggy.

    I still think Master J suspects I'm going to do something that might cause him terminal embarrassment. As if I would! Just before he left he gave me another one of those odd little glances. Was he gazing into the future? Or trying to read my mind to see if I had some sort of plan for causing mayhem and mischief? I g
  5. DarthIshtar Chosen One

    Member Since:
    Mar 26, 2001
    star 9
    Lightsabres are scary. I think I want one!

    So classically Jemmy. :) And poor G'emela probably has no idea what she's getting herself into...
  6. mouse2 Jedi Master

    Member Since:
    Oct 29, 1999
    star 4
    This, of course, is downright devious and as such worthy of a Corellian's admiration.

    That's because Jemmy is probably doing the same thing back to her. It's amazing how a Corellian's mind works. ;)

    So, after a moment's consideration I have decided that I like her.

    But she does look like a Bantha.


    You can always depend on Jemmy to tell you the truth about such matters. Except of course when it's Quiggy and Ben and she's wanting them to come back saftely. Or borrow their lightsaber. [face_whistling]
  7. Jemmiah Jedi Grand Master

    Member Since:
    Mar 5, 2000
    star 5
    ENTRY TWO HUNDRED AND FORTY:


    If you can't beat 'em, pretend to join 'em until you can.

    G'emela's certainly good at talking! I've learned one thing very quickly: steer her onto a topic she's enthusiastic about and she'll not only forget what she's asking you but will spend the next few hours recounting all the stuff she's done and all the places she's gone to over the years. It's quite interesting, because knowledge is power. I'm hoping I will learn enough about Quiggy so that if the moment ever arrives when he tells me to do something that he's already done himself, I can then blackmail him with it and truthfully tell him that G'emela snitched on him!

    I'm sure this sounds underhand, diary. It is I suppose, but I would never do anything deliberately horrible to Quiggy. Except maybe shave off his beard whilst he was asleep just to see what he looks like under that thing. I mean, what has he got to hide? I guess he looks kinda smart with it (although don't tell him I said so) but I'm so desperate to see what he looks like without it!

    I asked G'emela if he's always had a beard. She said that when he was first searching for a padawan he didn't have any facial hair at all, but soon after she'd been padawaned he started sporting the dead vrelt look, so she can barely remember him without the chin fuzz. Oh, well?if there are no holos of a denuded Quiggy to be had then I'll just have to dream of the day when I can con him into removing it!

    I've learned a lot about Quiggy from G'emela. She obviously cares a lot about him coz she smiles whenever his name is mentioned. It's an odd little smile that curves up wickedly at the corners, as if she's remembering something she perhaps shouldn't. Whenever I mention Dex her left brow does this half-frowny thing like she's pretending to be unimpressed, but I can tell she doesn't really dislike him. And when I mention old Master Shiny her eyes narrow like a snapper fish about to strike. I get the impression she genuinely has a low opinion of Mace. Have they ever had a row, I wonder? And if so, what was it about?

    Other than Quiggy, G'emela's interests range from council policies, galactic affairs, snooping around in search of information and fast speeders! Well, I say yuck to all of that - except the speeders! Politics is boring, anyway, and so is the senate. It's full of people with no manners and no social life, who can't hold down a decent normal job and like the sound of their own voice, and want to feel more important than they actually are. You don't choose to be a politician any more than you set out to be a garbage skip driver. You sort of become one accidentally, I think, because you fail at all your other subjects at school and in desperation settle on politics to make it look like you're doing something constructive with your life. There might be a small amount of people who want to make a difference and help others less fortunate by representing them in the senate, but to be honest there's so much hot air in the chambers I'm surprised the building doesn't float away.

    Besides, I heard Ben say that the senate is composed of hundreds of separate mouths and one mind: the mouths are always open and the mind is invariably closed. That's a pretty smart thing to say, isn't it? Ben's so clever!

    Speeders however are a lot more fun! At least I think they are. I've only ever been on one a couple of times in my life and the last time we had to jump over the side to avoid being chased by Merdan's men. I did have a softish landing as I fell on Qui-Gon, so I can't complain too much. And Quiggy had a soft landing too?in a patch of nettles. That broke his fall a little. Or took his mind off any bruises his may have received.

    I've listened to G'emela now for ages telling me about this and that, and how she likes to tinker with mechanical stuff. Apparently one of her skills is making things out of virtually nothing. Like in those silly holo shows where the good guys are locked away in a garage and have to break their way out by creating an armored v
  8. DarthIshtar Chosen One

    Member Since:
    Mar 26, 2001
    star 9
    The description of G'emela's reactions to the mention of each name was hilarious, as was the explanation of how one becomes a politician. And Evla has a right to be concerned. :)
  9. mouse2 Jedi Master

    Member Since:
    Oct 29, 1999
    star 4
    Besides, I heard Ben say that the senate is composed of hundreds of separate mouths and one mind: the mouths are always open and the mind is invariably closed. That's a pretty smart thing to say, isn't it? Ben's so clever!

    Ben is quite clever and quite correct too! ;)

    Hmmmm.... Now I'm curious as to what the tension between Evla and G'emela is! But I like the thought that she doesn't think of Dexy as the idiot she let's everyone believe she thinks he is. As for Mace... Right on sister! :cool:
  10. Jemmiah Jedi Grand Master

    Member Since:
    Mar 5, 2000
    star 5
    ENTRY TWO HUNDRED AND FORTY TWO:


    Okay. I made a bit of an error of judgement this morning.

    I wish I wasn't so?so keen to throw myself into everything without thinking about it! But I was so determined to do something right for once. And I really want to do something that will make Quiggy proud of me?or at least impress him with my determination. I'm so bad at so many things that he must sometimes wonder if I'm as thick as a Hutt sandwich! I've seen the pained way he looks at me when I try to avoid doing my mathematics lessons. I want to be good at it, but my head hurts when I stare at figures too long and I just can't concentrate at all. My mathematical abilities match my physical age: never developing beyond the age of six. I think that's why I'm so good at writing and stuff: because it compensates for how awful I am at everything else.

    Well diary, as you know, I've been trying to learn to swim. Quiggy's been so good with me and I was beginning to feel that I could take on the whole galaxy. I decided not to wait for G'emela to appear this morning: I just told Evla that I was going for a walk and that I'd meet G'emela in an hour outside the temple swimming pool. Evla gave me a searching look but said nothing, so I finished breakfast and went.

    Have I got rocks in my head? Or a death wish? I spend so much time worrying about what, or rather who, is waiting to kill me outside the temple that I never even think of all the things that could kill me inside the building! Do I think things through? Do I stop long enough to think, 'hmm?that might not be such a good idea?' Of course not.

    I had what I think is called a 'revelation'. I got down to the pool, wearing my ridiculous costume (looking like a giant wader-bird) and collected my float. If you go down early enough there's usually nobody there to see you, which is good because that's the way I like it. I remember looking at the float and thinking to myself that I didn't really need it anymore. I felt so sure I could do it! I was bursting with confidence.

    So I threw it away.

    I mean, Quiggy had been telling me that very soon I wouldn't be needing the float. And he should know, because he's a Jedi and they tend to know all kind of things. It never actually occurred to me that he could be telling a white lie just to bolster my confidence until I jumped in and realized that I still couldn't actually swim.

    And other than splashing about in a panic that's about the last thing I remember, other than thinking how upset Master J was going to be to come home and find out that all his hard work had been for nothing. Especially if Ben's dream comes true and he gets shot in the stomach, in which case Quiggy's going to feel as if he's jinxed (which I understand completely because I am a jinx). Damn, wish I hadn't thought that about Ben: I'd forgotten about that for a moment! Now I'll be back to worrying about him now.

    My memories of what happened are sketchy, but I woke up with a really sore back. It appears that G'emela stopped off at Evla's place and then followed me down to the pool. Apparently she fished me out, and then spent the next few minutes squeezing water out of my lungs, which is why I feel as if I've been squashed in a vice! I mean, not to sound ungrateful for having my life saved but G'emela's pretty heavy handed at the best of times and she was certainly robust when it came to dechlorinating me! And there's not much of me anyway?are all my ribs still in place? Hang on, I'll check?

    Yeah, I think so.

    Looks like I have G'emela's nosiness to thank for rescuing me. If she hadn't followed I would have drowned for sure. The most galling thing is that it's so embarrassing! I mean it was a stupid thing to do and it's probably confirmed everyone's opinion of how pathetic I am. But at least Evla and G'emela seem a lot more friendly towards each other now. Evie was relieved beyond words and was so terribly reluctant to leave for the crèche that I felt really bad for her, but if it's helped to incr
  11. mouse2 Jedi Master

    Member Since:
    Oct 29, 1999
    star 4
    There are germs in swimming pools... EWWWWWWW!!! [face_sick] I don't want to think of what types of germs were in that swimming pool!

    I do sympathise with her G'emela induced brusing. That can't feel comfortable. And fingers crossed that Jemmy's better and out of bed before Qui and Obi get back! As for Jemmy and mathimatics... she just hasn't met the right teacher yet. ;)

    Great! I just gave myself another bunny.
  12. Calamity Jinn Jedi Master

    Member Since:
    May 23, 2000
    star 4
    Poor Jemmy! Good thing G'emela is nosey, otherwise think of all the fabulous stories about Jemmy & Co we would have missed out on!

    At least Evla and G'emela are on better terms.

    Thank you for posting!!! I've missed this story!!!! [:D]
  13. DarthIshtar Chosen One

    Member Since:
    Mar 26, 2001
    star 9
    Poor Jemmy, look where confidence gets you sometimes.
  14. Healer_Leona Manager Emeritus

    Member Since:
    Jul 7, 2000
    star 9
    Playing catch up here...awww, poor girl. First enarly dorwning and then getting squished by G'mela. [face_worried]
  15. maychorian Jedi Master

    Member Since:
    Jan 7, 2005
    star 4
    LOL! Poor Jemmy, so impulsive. I really enjoyed that story.
  16. Jemmiah Jedi Grand Master

    Member Since:
    Mar 5, 2000
    star 5
    ENTRY TWO HUNDRED AND FORTY THREE:

    Not sick yet. That's got to be good news.

    I'm not looking forward to this school camp thingy one little bit. Worrying about Quiggy and Ben actually takes my mind off worrying about my having to be stuck in a giant tent with Ms. Vram for days on end. Some people might think I'm over-reacting but when I mention that Ms. Vram nearly wiped out her class last year by setting the tent on fire you will understand why I am just slightly concerned.

    Some people get home schooled. I wish I were!

    Just think of the fun I could have in here all day! I'd never have to set foot outside the temple?never have to worry about being snatched off the street and being 'disappeared' by the likes of Rufus Merdan. I keep trying to tell Quiggy that it'll happen one day but all he does is smile at me in that affectionate Jedi way and ruffle my hair, and say that Merdan would never dare. But he doesn't know him like I do. The fact is that Merdan is clever. Really, really clever. If he decides he's going to do something then it means he'll do it, sooner or later. And Quiggy wonders why I'm so scared? Wasn't what happened to Nadine, Suzette and the others enough for him? What more proof does he want? Does nothing scare him at all?

    I think he wants me to have a "normal childhood", but it's too late for that. There's nothing normal about my childhood: I wasn't really allowed to have one. Sometimes I think that's why he goes overboard and stuff?I read about it somewhere. It's called overcompensating or something like that. He wants me to interact with other kids and be normal, but I don't want to! I was brought up with adults. The only other kid I ever knew was my brother - oh, and Mrs. Dinfler's granddaughter Fiellah. I forgot about her. I didn't really like her either coz she and Todd used to throw stones at my Vampki to make him run around on his chain. I was so pleased when he bit her (my Vampki, not Todd).

    The other kids at school seem to sense I'm strange. They don't know why exactly but they know all the same. I try to be friendly and some of them smile at me, so I guess that's progress of sorts, but it's like they aren't comfortable with me. Some of them want to know why I live with the Jedi. Some of them want to know how come I don't have any parents like normal kids. I just shrug: it's easier than telling them.

    I could study with the Jedi, couldn't I? Couldn't I sit in with some of them when they're getting basic tutoring rather than the one-to-one stuff with their masters? I could be really quiet and sit at the back of the room and get in nobody's way?

    Even a droid tutor would be better than Ms. Vram! At least you can control a droid?but Ms. Vram is so unpredictable! I mean, you know she's going to stuff-up but never how exactly. I'm going to take a fireproof body suit with me on this trip. And a droid tutor wouldn't have the hots for Quiggy, either. I don't think droids do it for him.

    Actually, I don't think anyone does it for him. Or the Jedi in general. It's not really allowed, which is odd because if you scratch behind the surface they're all at it behind each other's backs. I think the council doesn't care as long as they can't see it, which is slightly naughty of them. I mean, I've heard that the fire breathing old Draigon known otherwise as Sal-Fina was once involved with Quiggy but she's obviously scarred him for life coz I've seen no other signs of him so much as looking at another Jedi in that way. Which is just as well, because Quiggy belongs to me and no other, and if any other girl says to the contrary I will scratch her eyes out!

    Then again, if he were being 'discrete', like the council says, would I know if he had eyes for someone else???

    I never thought about this before! This is alarming!!! Quiggy and some female?urgh! I'm not standing for that. I couldn't bear it! Someone slobbering over him?ewwww! Maybe he has got someone special and I don't know about it? How w
  17. DarthIshtar Chosen One

    Member Since:
    Mar 26, 2001
    star 9
    It's a miracle! Oh, wait, I shouldn't refer to a post that way first off. Very sweet her concern.
  18. Noelie Jedi Master

    Member Since:
    Jul 11, 2005
    star 4
    The Quiggy concerns are so darn cute!

    "He is not repulsive" had me cracking up.. and dear Jemmiah. the BEARD makes him :)

    I loved it.
  19. -DarkScorpion- Jedi Knight

    Member Since:
    Jun 22, 2006
    star 1
    This is VERY FUNNY keep up the good work

    Oh My,:eek: Oh My,:eek: a Still [face_laugh] LOL!
  20. Healer_Leona Manager Emeritus

    Member Since:
    Jul 7, 2000
    star 9
    Sweet to see more here. I can totally understand why Jemmiah would want to keep QUiggy all to herself. [face_love] [face_love]

    But she can't, He's all mine!! :p :p

    She's best be careful of what she wishes for in wanting to be sick. o_O
  21. mouse2 Jedi Master

    Member Since:
    Oct 29, 1999
    star 4
    And here too? We're getting spoiled here! Not that I'm complaining! :D

    It's called overcompensating or something like that. Why does that statement just give me chills?

    Quiggy and some female?urgh! I'm not standing for that. I couldn't bear it! Someone slobbering over him?ewwww! Although that's quite funny because despite Leona's protest from her post :)p) Jemmy's the one that was the most hellbent on getting them together! [face_batting]
  22. Jemmiah Jedi Grand Master

    Member Since:
    Mar 5, 2000
    star 5
    ENTRY TWO HUNDRED AND FORTY FOUR:


    Have you ever heard that phrase?the one about protesting too much?

    I had the most horrific thought. What if it's Sal-Fina that Qui-Gon still secretly hankers over??? What if he's just pretending to dislike her? I mean, from what I've heard from various sources (I can get Mace Windu to tell me anything if I can flutter my eyelashes pathetically enough) they were really keen on each other once. More than keen. It's horrible, isn't it? Poor Quiggy at the mercy of that harridan?at least that's the way I always thought about it. But what if he still fancies her?

    I want to test the water when he comes back. I could just casually drop into the conversation the tale of how Sal-Fina forced me to wander the streets in the pouring rain, and how I nearly got into a rather nasty situation with some drunken Glit-sniffer as a result. That way if he doesn't still fancy her he will go round to shout at her. And if he does then he'll just sit on his hands and shrug.

    Surely he's got more sense than to fancy Sal-Fina??? But that didn't stop him in the past, did it? If he's capable of such a terrible lapse in taste back then, it's probably a case of anything goes!

    That makes me wonder if - shock horror - Sal-Fina vaguely resembled a human being back in her wrinkle-less heyday. She must have had something going for her? It couldn't have been her personality. She's got no figure to speak of?all legs from top to bottom. Maybe Quiggy likes leggy people? Who else has legs?

    I mean long legs. I don't mean to infer that Quiggy goes for legless people. Although you'd have to be drunk to go for Sal-Fina, wouldn't you?

    Makes you wonder though, doesn't it? If someone as twisted and bitter as Sal-Fina can be normal once upon a time, it just goes to show how things can change people. How will I change as I grow up? Will I be important to someone the way Sal-Fina was to Qui-Gon? Will I become pretty? I think this is stretching credulity (another nice word) a little, but a girl can dream. I have quite a bad temper some times?will it get any better? Maybe I'll grow into a shriveled up, mean harpy like Sal?

    Well, there's nothing I can do about that. I've got to focus on the present, as Quiggy keeps telling Ben. So, I'm drawing up a list of all female Jedi who have longer than average legs, and then maybe I'll discover who it is that Master J has the hots for.

    ENTRY TWO HUNDRED AND FORTY FIVE:

    Well, it isn't Yaddle - that's for certain.

    Why is it that people are staring at me like I've gone strange in the head? You'd think they'd never seen anyone wander round the temple with a flimsy pad and stylus, taking notes on their leg length. Not to mention the fact that they seem to be cheating, hiding away underneath their robes! I can hardly see without bending over and trying to peer up their cloak! Which, I might add, looks decidedly odd.

    If anyone asks I'm doing a school project on boot/shoe fashions. Which again sounds odd because most of the Jedi have really boring clothes and boots. Ben's vainer than most, but even he is showing signs of turning into mister average Jedi with his cream tunics and matching cream accessories. Who decided that brown and beige were a good basic color scheme, hmm? I mean, own up! What kind of statement does that make? Could there be a more non-descript color than brown? Ben should be wearing greens and blues to bring out the shade of his eyes more. Unless he's sneaking a drink at a nearby cantina, in which case he'd have to be wearing red to match his bloodshot expression?

    There goes Vernice Ashdal! She's got legs that go on forever! And she has a shape, too. Maybe it's her that Quiggy loves?

    Nah, wishful thinking. I mean, Quiggy and Vernice? So much more preferable than 'the monster', but I'm beginning to clutch at straws. Adi Gallia has really long legs, too. And so does Master Ziz?except they're not so much legs as tentacles.

    But at least he'd have plenty to
  23. VaderLVR64 Manager Emeritus

    Member Since:
    Feb 5, 2004
    star 8
    Woo hoo! It's back! :D

    Have you ever heard that phrase?the one about protesting too much?

    I had the most horrific thought. What if it's Sal-Fina that Qui-Gon still secretly hankers over??? What if he's just pretending to dislike her? I mean, from what I've heard from various sources (I can get Mace Windu to tell me anything if I can flutter my eyelashes pathetically enough) they were really keen on each other once. More than keen. It's horrible, isn't it? Poor Quiggy at the mercy of that harridan?at least that's the way I always thought about it. But what if he still fancies her?


    [face_laugh] =D=
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