Men are like.....Mascara. They usually run at the first sign of emotion. Men are like.....Bike helmets. Handy in an emergency, but otherwise they just look silly. Men are like.....Government bonds. They take so long to mature. Men are like.....Copiers. You need them for reproduction, but that's about it. Q: How do you know when a woman's about to say something smart? A: When she starts her sentence with "A man once told me..." Q: Why do men pass gas more than women? A: Because women won't shut up long enough to build up pressure. Q: Why were shopping carts invented? A: To teach women to walk on their hind legs. Women are like guns, keep one around long enough and you're going to want to shoot it.