Jokes? Anybody?

That was great!

 

Ooopsies. But, funny.

 

A horse walks into a bar, and the bartender says "Why the long face?"

The bartender was fired a day later for letting a horse into the bar.

I thought of that one on my own. That's why it's so funny!

 

nice TK... LOL!

 

Its nice to know some people like my jokes

 

Since everyone likes a good Yankees joke, this is something I got in my email the other day so if you've heard it, so sorry. But I got a little giggle out of it.

Four baseball fans, each from a major league city, are climbing a mountain.
On the way to the top, each is arguing about how loyal they are to their team and what they would do for their team.

As the climb progresses, the odds increase. Upon reaching the top, the Mets fan shouts, "This is for the Mets," and hurls himself off the top.

Next the Brave fan yells, "I love Atlanta, this is for the Braves," and hurls himself off the mountain.

Suddenly the Red Sox fan yells "This is for everyone," and pushes the Yankees fan off .

hehehe, Enjoy

 

That's good!

 

Thats a classic...but still a good one.

Hey, did anyone here about the stamp recall that the Post Office had to make?

Yeah, they had pictures of Yankees players on them. People couldn't figure out which side to spit on.

 

Ok, how do you keep a idiot in suspense??

































I'll tell ya later

 

All righty...I got two in my e-mail today from my good old Mom.

The first one is a Yankees joke:

Two boys are playing hockey on a pond in Boston Common when one is attacked by a rabid Rottweiler. Thinking quickly, the
other boy takes his stick, wedges it down the dog's collar and twists, breaking the dog's neck.

A reporter who was strolling by sees the incident, and rushes over to interview the boy. "Young Bruins Fan Saves Friend From Vicious Animal," he starts writing in his notebook.

"But I'm not a Bruins fan," the little hero replied.

"Sorry, since we are in Boston, I just assumed you were." said the reporter and starts again.

"Red Sox Fan Rescues Friend From Horrific Attack" he continued writing in his notebook.

"I'm not a Red Sox fan either," the boy
said.

"I assumed everyone in Boston was either for the Bruins or Red Sox. What team do you root for? The reporter asked.

"I'm a Yankees fan." The child said.

The reporter starts a new sheet in his
notebook and writes, "Little Bastard from New York Kills Beloved Family Pet."

And this one is a toungue twister:

Edit: Deleted because of offensive language.

 

I just got that first one in an email today also,heard it before, but it still cracks me up.

The tongue twister is great!!

 

I love the first one.

 

lol!

 

Oh good...Rox didn't edit the toungue twister. I didn't really think about what it said before I posted it, I just thought it was funny. hehe

 

I didn't edit it because I just saw it now. This is gonna stop here and now! I like to have as much fun as the next guy but the offensive language will stop in this thread, period. The next person to post foul language or anything thing else even close is banned for a month. Plus I'll ban all your socks forever.

 

Righto. Will do, Rox.

 

I got this in an e-mail a while back, and I thought it was pretty funny:

You are a Bostonian if...

> > You've slammed on your brakes to deter a tailgater
> >
> > Your favorite adjective is "wicked"
> >
> > You remember when the "Fleet Center" was "The Boston Garden" and refuse
> To
> > refer to it as anything BUT "the Gahden"
> >
> > Know at least three Tony's, one Vinnie and a Frank(ie)
> >
> > You go to the "packy" not the "liquor store"
> >
> > Paranoia sets in if you can't see a Dunkin Donuts, ATM or CVS within
> > Eyeshot at all times.
> >
> > Know how to claim your space on the T
> >
> > Know what the T is
> >
> > You keep an ice scraper and can of de-icer on the floor of your
> car...year round
> >
> > You still try to order curly fries from Burger King
> >
> > You know how to pronounce Worcester, Peabody, and Cotuit
> >
> > You know where the Combat Zone used to be and still avoid that area
> >
> > You don't eat dinner; you eat "suppa"
> >
> > Pepsi, Coke, Sprite, etc are not called "soda", they are "tonic"
> >
> > You order iced coffee in January
> >
> > You can curse in Italian...only you don't say "curse" you say "swear"
> >
> > You don't understand the purpose of a crosswalk and therefore refuse to
> > Use them, even outside of Boston
> >
> > You know what candlepin bowling is
> >
> > You know about Evacuation Day
> >
> > You have tried to drive the measured mile in less than 45 seconds.
> >
> > You drive 45 minutes to New Hampshire to save $5 in sales tax
> >
> > The whole 'Big Dig' mess drives you nuts unless you are spooning it from
>
> > Brighams
> >
> > You know what Brighams is and it shows
> >
> > You've used the statement "not fa nuthin" in conversation.
> >
> > You serve bread with every meal.
> >
> > You feel compelled to hear at least one weather report a day.
> >
> > You've pulled out of a side street and used your car to block oncoming
> > traffic so you can make a left.
> >
> > You've bragged about the money you've saved at The Christmas Tree Shop.
> >
> > You've used the breakdown lane on 93 to pass someone.
> >
> > You think banana, vanilla, and idea all ends in the letter "r"...of
> course no otha word does though

 

The funny thing about that is...

I actually do most of the stuff on that list

 

lol. I'm definatly from MA, then.

 

LOL That was great!

 

Yup, I'm from Mass. alrighty.

And I do keep de-icer in my car year round. That, a scraper and an emergency repair kit.

 

The funny thing is, my cousins from New York think my name ends with an "r"..and it ends with a "a"...

Of course, my family's just strange. My mom's from New York, My dad's from New Jersey, and they both keep the quirks while us kids try not to seem embrassed.

 

I'm going to a college that's roughly half Bay Staters and half New Yorkers. It's going to be FUN!