Just a fun little story to get me over writer's block.

Discussion in 'Fan Fiction Stories--Classic JC Board (Reply-Only)' started by Amidolee, Sep 10, 2000.

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  1. caet1 Jedi Knight

    Member Since:
    Jun 29, 2000
    star 1
    are ane and anakin the same person?
  2. Amidolee Force Ghost

    Member Since:
    Jan 8, 2000
    star 5
    No, Ane is a Padawan from the USJS thread. Guess I should have thought that Ani and Ane might get confused. Sorry.
  3. Anakin's Angel Jedi Master

    Member Since:
    May 3, 2000
    star 4

    Well, that was hilarious! I loved the line about the manicure sets! lol! And, as for my..*cough* knowledge of Ani's virginity....maybe all that chocolate Ami's been eating is just a sign that Ani hasn't really...well. Oh dear, I should stop RIGHT THERE! lol

    aa :D
  4. Senni_Arava Jedi Knight

    Member Since:
    Sep 22, 2000
    star 3
  5. Amidolee Force Ghost

    Member Since:
    Jan 8, 2000
    star 5
    Odd. Studying the last post, half of it is cut off. The first half.

    Is this Darth Server attacking????
  6. Senni_Arava Jedi Knight

    Member Since:
    Sep 22, 2000
    star 3
    page 10. UP!!!!!!!
    post, please! :)
  7. Amidolee Force Ghost

    Member Since:
    Jan 8, 2000
    star 5
    Weird. Darth Sever's attacking this thread. I posted last night, and it's not here. And the last post that is showing has cut of the 1st half!

    This thread was to get me over a block. I'll finish it, but it's sort of a pet project now that I'm working on Child. I'll still get posts up, they just won't be at a regular basis.
  8. Alderaan21 Jedi Master

    Member Since:
    Jul 24, 1998
    star 4
    ROTFL!!! I can't believe I didn't find this story before. This goes right up there with Melrose Naboo, in the milk-squirted-from-nose-from-too-much-laughing department. :)

    I don't think I want to know any more than that, AA. ;)

    (And, unfortunately, I do know what it's like when a woman at her certain time of the month is deprived of her chocolate... all too well...)
  9. Senni_Arava Jedi Knight

    Member Since:
    Sep 22, 2000
    star 3
  10. Amidolee Force Ghost

    Member Since:
    Jan 8, 2000
    star 5
    Melrose Naboo is this awesome satire! I don't have the link, but I think Alderaan 21 does! :)

    Anakin froze when he heard the voices and the hum of a lightsaber. They would surely head for the laundry room. He had to find an escape. Quietly, he opened the back door and entered another empty voice of darkness. Swallowing hard, he felt along the wall. He was in some long corridor. The voices drew closer and he picked up his pace. He had to rely wholly on the Force for guidance.

    ?Oh,? Sabé?s voice carried over. ?Obi-Wan, isn?t this arousing? Hunting down Ani for a sacrifice. It?s too bad Ami had to get sick.?

    Anakin could hear Obi-Wan clear his throat as the Naboo girl continued. Padme was sick? Well, serves her right for wanting to behead him! He crept along, and the voices faded. They were heading in the opposite direction. He paused, then took a step back.

    MEEEEEOOOOOW!!

    ?AAAHHH!? Anakin screamed, jumping at the horrendous yowl. Sharp claws dug into his legs, and he felt something very feline climb his body, wrapping it?s warm fur around his face. Sabrina!

    ?Listen! I hear him!? Ane shouted gleefully. ?This way!?

    ?Oh, Jedi Hell,? Anakin swore, choking on black fur. He gathered the Force and hurlerd Sabrina away. ?Get Obi-Wan! Not me!?

    There was the scuttling of paws, then a far-off hiss, and Obi-Wan?s scream echoed down the hallway. Laughing, Anakin turned and ran.





  11. PadmeCoen1138 Jedi Knight

    Member Since:
    Aug 12, 2000
    star 2
    This story is so cute.
    People like to torture Obi wan, too? See, I'm an OT LA (Original tril. Luke-abuser) and I'm doing some research into the art of LA-ing. IF people ever have similar "encounters" with Obi wan, I must know.
  12. Alderaan21 Jedi Master

    Member Since:
    Jul 24, 1998
    star 4
    Melrose Naboo: http://www.fortunecity.com/lavendar/casablanca/76/mn/index.htm

    I get a kick out of torture of both Obi-Wan and Anakin, so this story is perfect for moi. :)


    "?Oh, Jedi Hell,? Anakin swore, choking on black fur. He gathered the Force and hurlerd Sabrina away. ?Get Obi-Wan! Not me!?

    There was the scuttling of paws, then a far-off hiss, and Obi-Wan?s scream echoed down the hallway."

    Teehee! I get a huge kick out of that for some strange reason. Up! :)
  13. Amidolee Force Ghost

    Member Since:
    Jan 8, 2000
    star 5
    I LOVE your sig, Alderaan! :-D

    I'll get more posts up, but I'm preoccupied at the moment :) But don't worry, I love Obi-torture, so this will contain muy mucho!
  14. PadmeCoen1138 Jedi Knight

    Member Since:
    Aug 12, 2000
    star 2
    Cool!
    See, I'm attempting to figure out why everyone gets such a kick out of abusing their favorite male Jedi. I've already discussed it with a friend of mine who's into phsyology.
    This is a really nifty story.
  15. Amidolee Force Ghost

    Member Since:
    Jan 8, 2000
    star 5
    Hmm, I wonder why as well? Is it sensual, arousing? Or just plain fun?? :-D I think us females just like to see a hot guy squirm under our sometimes vicious stories :)
  16. Anakin's Angel Jedi Master

    Member Since:
    May 3, 2000
    star 4

    Yes, and you dear can torture Obi-Wan like no one else! I think we do like seeing the big, brave man squirming and helpless...it's twisted, it's sithly...but it's DAMN fun! ;)

    aa :D
  17. Alderaan21 Jedi Master

    Member Since:
    Jul 24, 1998
    star 4
    Thanks Ami. :) It's one of my favorite quotes, actually...

    Why do I like torture? For me it's just the idea of seeing this formerly only-seen-as-heroic, strong character suddenly squirming like a paranoid worm. And having that squirming be the result of something so seemingly innocent *snicker* as a kitten makes it all the more deliciously satisfying and hilarious. :-D

    The last two lines of that last story post still really get this truly demented laugh out of me. Hehe. :)
  18. light_sabe_r Jedi Master

    Member Since:
    Feb 11, 2000
    star 4
    Why am I just finding this now?

    This is stupendous!

    I don't usually enjoy the company of cats. I'm like Obi-Wan with them. But I think Animals torturing humans is Hilarious! There's so many silly things animals do to cheez people off.

    I think Obi'll wind up being a dog person like me... Unless they end up biting him too, or worse using his lightsabre as a fetch stick.

    Okay. Amidolee your Plot bunnies are pure breed!

  19. light_sabe_r Jedi Master

    Member Since:
    Feb 11, 2000
    star 4
    Why am I just finding this now?

    This is stupendous!

    I don't usually enjoy the company of cats. I'm like Obi-Wan with them. But I think Animals torturing humans is Hilarious! There's so many silly things animals do to cheez people off.

    I think Obi'll wind up being a dog person like me... Unless they end up biting him too, or worse using his lightsabre as a fetch stick.

    Okay. Amidolee your Plot bunnies are pure breed!

  20. light_sabe_r Jedi Master

    Member Since:
    Feb 11, 2000
    star 4
  21. Senni_Arava Jedi Knight

    Member Since:
    Sep 22, 2000
    star 3
  22. Amidolee Force Ghost

    Member Since:
    Jan 8, 2000
    star 5
    I'll work on another post tonight. I'm just so busy with reports, research, other stories, and chores :-(
  23. Amidolee Force Ghost

    Member Since:
    Jan 8, 2000
    star 5
    ?GE? Um OOF MA!!?

    ?What?? Sabé asked, leaning forward in the dark. She hadn?t understood what had just happened, only that Obi-Wan had started screaming and something was banging against the wall.

    ?Obi?? Ane questioned, shining his lightsaber further down the hall. ?Obi-Wan Kenobi! Leave that cat alone!?

    The tiny black form of Sabrina was curled around Obi-Wan?s face, clawing desperately to his hair and braid. The Padawan was shouting something quite incoherent while shaking his head and trying to pull it off. He banged his head back against the wall, hoping to dislodge the furious kitten, but she was too agile and escaped the beating, digging her claws deeper into his flesh.

    ?Leave her alone!? Sabé cried, racing up the corridor. Angered by the boy?s outright cruelty to the cuddly kitten, she kicked Obi-Wan in the shin. ?LET HER GO, you, you MEAN-MEAN BOY!?

    ?OW!? Obi-Wan cried, stumbling over the girl?s foot, blind with Sabrina tangled in his hair. ?HEP ME! A naw dooo ta err!?

    ?What?s he saying?? Ane asked, frowning as Obi-Wan hit another wall and Sabrina let out a yowl.

    ?I don?t know. Maybe it?s Huttese,? Sabé shrugged.

    ?Come on, Obi, stop playing around!? Ane said impatiently. ?We have a future Sith Lord to sacrifice!?

    ?Really?? Sabé asked, eyes wide.

    ?Well, Yoda yaks on about it. But he?s such a senile old toad no one listens to him. He senses much fear in everything. The lilies Master Depa sent her were apparently part of the Dark Side.?

    ?How interesting. What?d he do with them??

    (Meanwhile, Obi-Wan is still stumbling into walls)

    ?Well, killing something living is part of the Dark Side, and lilies can?t attack us, so we couldn?t kill them. Yoda gave them to Qui-Gon as a joke or something. I remember Obi talking how Sabrina attacked them.?

    ?Hmm.?

    There?s a loud thump. Both turn to see Obi-Wan, scratched and bleeding, grinning madly down at the curled ball of Sabrina. His eyes glittered in the light of his saber as he raised it, ready to let it fall.

    ?NOOOOOOOOOO!? Sabé screamed, running down the hall and pushing the Padawan into the wall. ?Don?t hurt the kitty!?

    Obi-Wan recovered, growling as he rubbed yet another large bruise to add to the collection. Don?t hurt the ?kitty-? Sith Hells, look what that evil lifeform did to me! I say to the dark side with it! TO THE DARK SIDE!!!?

    ?Yup, he?s lost it,? Ane said.

    Sabé sniffled, giving Obi-Wan a dirty look. ?I thought I liked you, Obi, but you?re so mean to animals.?

    ?And he made the Jedi disappear,? Ane added.

    Obi-Wan glares at Ane, whom shrugs. ?What? It?s true, isn?t it??

    ?Shut up, Ane.?

    ?See? You?re mean!? Sabé picks up Sabrina, who mews weakly, then purrs under the girl?s caresses. ?There, there, you pretty thing. I won?t let that mean old Padawan hurt you anymore. Come on, Ane.?

    They both turn to leave. Obi-Wan glares at both of them, bleeding and looking as if he had fought a Sith Lord. Then as Ane and Sabé disappear around a corner in hunt for Anakin, he realizes their leaving him in the dark. Alone.

    ?Um, guys? Guys? I love Sabrina, too! She?s so pretty! . . . Ah, ****.?

    @@@@@@@





  24. Amidolee Force Ghost

    Member Since:
    Jan 8, 2000
    star 5
  25. Amidolee Force Ghost

    Member Since:
    Jan 8, 2000
    star 5
    Oh, shavit, I post a new post and everyone's given up on me!
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