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  1. In Memory of LAJ_FETT: Please share your remembrances and condolences HERE

Saga Lenny and Luke--A Holiday Showdown

Discussion in 'Fan Fiction- Before, Saga, and Beyond' started by BlindMan, Dec 19, 2004.

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  1. BlindMan

    BlindMan Jedi Master star 2

    Registered:
    Nov 25, 2001
    LENNY AND LUKE--A HOLIDAY SHOWDOWN

    CHAPTER ONE:


    'Twas the night before Boonta, and on Coruscant,
    a fanboy named Lenny was throwing a rant.

    "I just can't believe it!" he shouted and raved.
    "How could he do this? I feel so...betrayed!"

    He stormed 'round his home, with his arms flailing wide;
    while loudly, profanities and curses he cried.

    And what was the cause? What had got him so pissed?
    Why, the trio of holovids clutched in his fist.

    A gift from his kindly Aunt Gertrude, they were--
    he'd opened them gladly, quite gladly, for sure.

    But joy turned to rage once he'd finished them all,
    and once-mellow Lenny now bounced off his walls.

    And the contents of those holovids, you might ask?
    Hold tight--exposition's my very next task:

    At Endor, near thirty years prior, you see,
    the Rebels had finally achieved victory.

    The Empire was vanquished, the future was bright!
    Decisions were made--both the wrong and the right.

    The smuggler, the princess--they hooked up at last,
    there 'neath the glow of the Death Star's great blast.

    While Luke, the last Jedi, he chose a new path--
    the one that eventually earned Lenny's wrath.

    Rather than study the Force anymore,
    Luke changed the history of holofilm lore.

    He picked up a camera and filmed his life's tale:
    Tatooine, Hoth...he filmed all his travails.

    From days on the farm, to the Emperor's fall,
    he shot every scene, recreated them all.

    A trio of films, Luke eventually had,
    and as a director, he wasn't half-bad.

    The movies were hits, the cash rolled right on in.
    And legions of fans, well they made quite a din.

    (And if it seems crass to cash in on his fame,
    honestly, reader, wouldn't you do the same? ;) )

    And Lenny, dear Lenny, had grown up with those;
    he loved them straight through, from his head to his toes.

    He'd bought all the figures and playsets galore;
    posters and models and more, more, more!

    His home was near bursting with all of that stuff!
    And Lenny...that fanboy could not get enough.

    Commemerative plates and prop replicas, too...
    Magnets and postcards and costumes--woo hoo!

    But one thing was missing--the biggest thing yet.
    The one thing that every fan wanted to get:

    The movies themselves, for fans' holovid gear.
    But now that had changed--the vids finally were here!

    And Lenny had opened that gift box with glee,
    so very excited he near had to pee.

    The sound was amazing, the video great!
    It seemed that they really were worth all the wait.

    But then Lenny frowned, and that frown, it did grow.
    These weren't the movies he'd long come to know!

    Things had been added, and dialogue tweaked;
    and "Jedi Rocks"? Man, that whole sequence just reeked!

    Where were the films he so loved and adored?
    'Cause some of these changes were really quite poor.

    When finally the third movie's credits rolled by,
    Lenny, poor Lenny, just wanted to cry.

    From sadness to rage was a quick, easy hop;
    and once the hate came, it was quite hard to stop.

    Changing the movies? How dare Luke? How dare???!!!
    What of the fans? Didn't Skywalker care?

    Eventually, the madness, it started to wane,
    but deep in his heart, Lenny still felt some pain.

    He thought of the movies that once were so fun,
    and realized that something just had to be done.

    He hopped on the Holonet quick as he could,
    logged in as username "Palpatine's_Hood".

    To his great relief, he saw others mad, too.
    He wasn't alone--but now...what could they do?

    The fans, they did gripe, and the fans, they did mope;
    then Lenny came up with a bright ray of hope!

    He outlined his plan, which was really quite bold.
    It hadn't been tried yet; it sure broke the mold.

    Other fans thought it was perfect, indeed.
    And Lenny, brave Lenny, was chosen to lead.

    It wouldn't be easy, he knew that for sure,
    but some things were worth it--yep, some things sure were...



    And now, my dear readers, I must change the scene,
    and turn your eyes now out towards old Dantooine.

    There on the plains a big building did stand,
    a ranch built by Luke w
     
  2. VaderLVR64

    VaderLVR64 Manager Emeritus star 8 VIP - Former Mod/RSA

    Registered:
    Feb 5, 2004
    [face_laugh]

    That was hilarious!

    But one thing was missing--the biggest thing yet.
    The one thing that every fan wanted to get:

    The movies themselves, for fans' holovid gear.
    But now that had changed--the vids finally were here!

    And Lenny had opened that gift box with glee,
    so very excited he near had to pee.

    The sound was amazing, the video great!
    It seemed that they really were worth all the wait.

    But then Lenny frowned, and that frown, it did grow.
    These weren't the movies he'd long come to know!

    Things had been added, and dialogue tweaked;
    and "Jedi Rocks"? Man, that whole sequence just reeked!

    Where were the films he so loved and adored?
    'Cause some of these changes were really quite poor.

    When finally the third movie's credits rolled by,
    Lenny, poor Lenny, just wanted to cry.

    From sadness to rage was a quick, easy hop;
    and once the hate came, it was quite hard to stop.

    Changing the movies? How dare Luke? How dare???!!!
    What of the fans? Didn't Skywalker care?


    [face_laugh]


    I can't wait to see what you do next!
     
  3. Katla

    Katla Jedi Knight star 1

    Registered:
    Aug 13, 2004
    [face_laugh] Loved it! [face_laugh]
     
  4. DarthBreezy

    DarthBreezy Chosen One star 6

    Registered:
    Jun 4, 2002
    [face_laugh] [face_laugh] [face_laugh]


    More please!!!
     
  5. BlindMan

    BlindMan Jedi Master star 2

    Registered:
    Nov 25, 2001
    Thanks, gang! :)

    More on the way...



    :) Blind Man

     
  6. JediNemesis

    JediNemesis Jedi Padawan star 4

    Registered:
    Mar 27, 2003
    Oh, dear [face_laugh]
     
  7. ThePariah

    ThePariah Jedi Padawan star 4

    Registered:
    Jan 24, 2003
    [face_laugh] [face_laugh] [face_laugh] [face_laugh] [face_laugh]

    Best. Poem. Ever.

    *jumps in starship and joins Lenny's legion* [face_devil]
     
  8. VadersMistress

    VadersMistress Jedi Knight star 6

    Registered:
    Apr 7, 2004
    [face_laugh] I liked the changes! *ducks the rotten fruit being thrown at her*

    This was hilarious! You have a way with comedy. :D
     
  9. BlindMan

    BlindMan Jedi Master star 2

    Registered:
    Nov 25, 2001
    Thanks, folks! :)

    New post should be here within the next few days...



    :) Blind Man
     
  10. Laura_Anu

    Laura_Anu Jedi Padawan star 4

    Registered:
    Jun 27, 2002
    Oh. My. Gosh. Insane! I love it! I can't wait to see what Lenny and his gang do to Luke!
     
  11. rhonderoo

    rhonderoo Former Head Admin star 9 VIP - Former Mod/RSA

    Registered:
    Aug 7, 2002
    I'm a change fan also!

    You have got the fanboy thing down pat!!!! Please tell us...does Lenny work at the Coruscant Best Buy, live in his mom's basement and have a dog named Chewbacca??? [face_laugh]

    Great poem! I'm still cleaning wine from the keyboard!
     
  12. Falcon

    Falcon Chosen One star 10

    Registered:
    Feb 7, 2002
    [face_laugh] [face_laugh] [face_laugh] good one :D more soon
     
  13. Miana Kenobi

    Miana Kenobi Admin Emeritus star 8 VIP - Former Mod/RSA

    Registered:
    Apr 5, 2000
    LOL!!! Excellent job, BM! :)
     
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