CT Let's have some fun with "Star Wars, Twisted Logic"

Zero. Light bulbs don't soil themselves.


What were some of Admiral Ozzel's previous failures?

 

Mrs. Ozzel can tell you about his many "failures" in the bedroom.

Does Obi-Wan not know that all Sith Lords are named Darth?

 

Obi-Wan is to busy drinking at a bar, than to be concerned with Sith like that.


What was the Real Boosh doing while Leia borrowed his body armor and helmet?

 

Probably chilling on Hoth.

There is what appears to be "Grape Jelly" on Obi-Wans tan robe. Didn't Obi-Wan wash his clothes?

 

Yes, he sand-scoured it. There happened to be a purple womp rat in the sand, but it had been previously crushed.

If anger leads to hate, and hate leads to the dark side, what does the dark side lead to?

 

Rising damp.

What happened to Salacious Crumb?

 

Salacious B. Crumb ended up escaping before the sail barge exploded. As we all know he was somewhat the court jester, however, he had the last laugh as he turned Jabbas palace into an interspace strip club.

If Palpatines best troops were defeated on Endor, just where were his most inefficient troops sent?

 

So the Ewoks take Threepio for a god and Luke & Han as yummy treats- what do they make of Chewbacca?

 

Fur-lined boots.

What does Palpatine wear underneath his robes?

 

Depends!!!


Does Vader have a toilet in his meditation chamber.

 

His helmet. The urine soothes his burns.

Before he got the Rancor, what did Jabba keep in that room?

 

Someone beat me to it.

 

It was a swimming pool from Jabba's failed resort spa concept.

Do Threepio and Artoo ever have a chance to dry out all of Leia's clothes?

 

No, if you notice, she wears the same clothes all the way to Cloud City. (Even for a Princess, they probably stink to High Heaven.)


Why didn't Lando just fly the Falcon into the unfinished portion of DS2?

 

As he would have seen a builder that recognised him and Lando is far too smooth to fly by builders!
Who's scruffy looking?

 

Anakin was pretty scruffy looking, Obi-Wan looked for a good barber but could't find any who hadn't gone to the Confederacy. (Asaji Ventress, Nute Gunray and Poggle the Lesser were all great customers) He was finally forced to do it the hard way on Mustafar. Does Darth Vader short-circuit when he takes a bath?

 

Darth Vader doesn't bathe. Leia was wrong - the foul stench she recognised when she was brought on board the DS was all Vader, not Tarkin.

Were there any female Imperial officers or stormies?

 

Yes, and they were all hot.


How do you tell the difference between male and female Ewoks?

 

Pink headdresses and eyelashes.

 

TCW SPOILER FOR THE END
Why does Ahsoka really leave the order?