Lightbulbs! (EUC Humor)

Discussion in 'EU Community' started by CmdrMitthrawnuruodo, Sep 29, 2001.

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  1. CmdrMitthrawnuruodo Force Ghost

    Member Since:
    Jul 1, 2000
    star 6
    Jerj: Lord Bulb, this is an unexpected change. We're honored by your illumination.

    Bulb: You may dispense with the pleasantries, Commander. I'm here to put me back in my socket.

    Jerj: I assure you, Lord Bulb, my electricians are working as fast as they can.

    Bulb: Perhaps I can find new ways to illuminate them.

    Jerj: I tell you, this flood light will be operational as planned.

    Bulb: The Burnt Bulb does not share your optimistic appraisal of the situation.

    Jerj: But he asks the impossible. I need more electricians.

    Bulb: Then perhaps you can tell him when he arrives.

    Jerj: The Burnt Bulb is coming here?

    Bulb: That is correct, Commander. And he is most displeased with your apparent lack of illumination.

    Jerj: We shall double our changes.

    Bulb: I hope so, Commander, for your sake. The Burnt Bulb is not as forgiving as I am.
  2. Thrawn05 Jedi Knight

    Member Since:
    Aug 8, 2000
    star 1
    Ben: That lightbulb is our last hope
    Yoda: No, there is another one at sears.

    - And my sig -
    Through you will, of course, be ultimately illuminated by the lightbulb, your electrical and socket systems will remain under your control. Provided your electrons behave themselves, of course."
  3. Darth_Destructo Jedi Master

    Member Since:
    Oct 2, 2001
    star 4
    I like Warm Lightbulbs myself, though Energy Saving ones are good too...
  4. Rogue_Starbuck Jedi Master

    Member Since:
    Oct 29, 2000
    star 4
    Yoda: "Luminous bulbs are we...not this crude glass and wiring."
  5. Rogue_Starbuck Jedi Master

    Member Since:
    Oct 29, 2000
    star 4
    Luke: "What is it?"

    Ben: "It's your fathers light bulb. Not as clumsy or random as the sunlight, an elegent light source, for a more civilised age."
  6. JacenHornSolo Jedi Knight

    Member Since:
    Jan 29, 2002
    star 3
    OK, this isn't following the same pattern, hopefully everyone will like it though:

    What's the difference between Padme <(accent mark), and a lightbulb?

    You can unscrew the lightbulb.

    Har, Har, Har, laugh your heads off.
  7. Alderaan_ Jedi Master

    Member Since:
    Aug 14, 2001
    star 4
    Burning bulbs!

    (instead of vaping moffs!)
  8. GrandAdmiralJello Moderator Communitatis Litterarumque

    Manager
    Member Since:
    Nov 28, 2000
    star 10
    "Governor Tarkin? I could smell your burnt lightbulb when I got on board."

    "Shining to the last. You don't know how hard I found it hiring the worker to illuminate your life."

  9. CmdrMitthrawnuruodo Force Ghost

    Member Since:
    Jul 1, 2000
    star 6
  10. Tchewbacca Jedi Knight

    Member Since:
    Feb 19, 2001
    star 1
    who needs lightbulbs when you have light sabres?
  11. Doikk-Na-ts Jedi Knight

    Member Since:
    Feb 20, 2002
    star 2
    Han: That's what I thought, lightbulbs. Screwing into the power couplings.

    Frank Palpatine: You want this. Take your Jedi lightbulb, strike me down with it.

    Luke: But I was gonna go to Tachee Station and pick up some lightbulbs!

    Leia: I am not a lightbulb!
    / I'd just as soon kiss a lightbulb.

    Han: Sorry your highness, but we haven't got time for any lightbulbs.
  12. Doikk-Na-ts Jedi Knight

    Member Since:
    Feb 20, 2002
    star 2
    Han: What an amazing lightbulb you've discovered!
  13. SECRETSISTER Force Ghost

    Member Since:
    Nov 18, 2001
    star 8
    Wedge: What about those lightbulbs?

    Luke: You worry about those florescents, I'll worry about the lightbulbs!

    Biggs: Luke! are you sure you can hit the socket?

    Luke: Sure! it'll be just like the bathroom one back home!
  14. Playa_numero_1 Jedi Knight

    Member Since:
    May 6, 2002
    Luke: Master Yoda, You can't burn out!

    Yoda: Strong am I in the lightbulb, but not that strong.

    *****

    Hey maybe if stormtroopers had lightbulbs in their helmets they'd be able to see and shoot better. Then the rebels wouldn't have won!
  15. Trell Jedi Grand Master

    Member Since:
    Apr 11, 2002
    star 6
    The lightbulbs... why the lightbulbs... ?[face_plain]
  16. Innle_of_Obernewtyn Jedi Knight

    Member Since:
    Jun 11, 2002
    star 3
    Because there are no spoons. Why else?
  17. Jedi_Ben_Skywalker Jedi Master

    Member Since:
    Apr 19, 2002
    star 4
  18. Yomin_Carr Force Ghost

    Member Since:
    Jan 12, 2002
    star 4
    "What a wonderful light bulb you've discovered!"

  19. TIEPilot051999 Force Ghost

    Member Since:
    Mar 27, 2002
    star 7
    "Dangerous and disturbing, this lightbulb is. Only a Jedi could have blown it out."
  20. Lank_Pavail Jedi Grand Master

    Member Since:
    Sep 26, 2002
    star 7
    "If you will not turn to the dark side of the lightbulb, then perhaps she will."
  21. TIEPilot051999 Force Ghost

    Member Since:
    Mar 27, 2002
    star 7
    "It seems this contest cannot be won by our knowledge of the Force, but by our skills with a lightbulb."
  22. trianiigirl Jedi Grand Master

    Member Since:
    Jun 21, 2002
    star 5
    "Perhaps with just your presence, the darkness surronding this lightbulb will be revealed..."
  23. DeJade_Vu Jedi Master

    Member Since:
    Jul 29, 2002
    star 4

    VADER: Obi-Wan never told you what happened to your lightbulb.

    LUKE: He told me enough. He told me you broke it!

    VADER: No, Luke....I am your lightbulb.

    LUKE: NOOOOO!!


    Yoda: How do you get so big, using lightbulbs of this kind?

  24. Lank_Pavail Jedi Grand Master

    Member Since:
    Sep 26, 2002
    star 7
    Han: Horizontal Booster?

    Chewie: Rawr!

    Han: Alluvial Dampers?

    Chewie: Roraw!

    Han: That's not it, bring me the lightbulbs!
    (mutters) Don't how we're gonna get get out of this one (disappears in crawlsapce. Ship shudders, sound of breaking glass) OW! Chewie!
  25. MoronDude Jedi Grand Master

    Member Since:
    Nov 1, 2000
    star 6
    How many Jawas does it take to change a lightbulb?







    Four! Three to stand on each other's shoulders to reach the socket and one to give you the good one after it ironically blows out 30 seconds after selling it to you.

    ~~~~~~~~~~

    How many protocol droids does it take to change a lightbulb?







    None, they can?t stretch their arms that far, and even if they could, they?d spend the whole time whining about this ?not being part of their programming? and mopeing about this being their ?lot in life?.

    ~~~~~~~~~~

    How many Tuskens does it take to change a lightbulb?







    Two. [face_laugh]

    ~~~~~~~~~~

    How many Yodas does it take to change a lightbulb?






    None, because he?ll tell you the bulb is ?too old, yes, too old to light up?
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