LINGERING FROST - A POSTSCRIPT TO AUF - COMPLETED - 8/24/02

Discussion in 'Fan Fiction Stories--Classic JC Board (Reply-Only)' started by CYNICAL21, Aug 11, 2002.

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  1. CYNICAL21 Jedi Master

    Member Since:
    Jul 8, 2001
    star 4
    OK - here it is, as promised. Although written as a response to that famous fic-that-shall-remain-nameless (AKA the 400,000+ word magnum-opus) I think it will stand alone fairly well, and become clearer as time goes by.

    You, of course, are free to disagree (and I'm sure at least some of you will. :D )

    As always - all recognizable SW material is the property of the Bearded One - and no copyright infringement is intended.

    * * * * * * * * *


    In the aftermath of the battle of Naboo - and the defeat of the Sith apprentice - Anakin Skywalker returns to the Jedi Temple with his new Master, after spending several months in the city of Theed, at the invitation of Queen Amidala, as both the city - and the Jedi - recuperated from their damage at the hands of the Trade Federation - and the Sith.


    Almost six months have passed - - and they have finally come back to Coruscant - to begin new lives together. All is going very, very well. Astonishingly well. Unbelievably well.

    There are virtually no shadows in their lives.


    LINGERING FROST - THE AFTERMATH OF AUF



    Every day that goes by reaffirms my belief that our decisions were ultimately correct - that finding this treasure tucked deep into the sandy wastes of Tatooine was the will of the Force - that to refuse his training would have been the height of folly. For knowledge once learned can never be unlearned - and potential once unlocked cannot simply be willed into non-existence.

    I sit and watch him - watch the raw power and unschooled abilities - and know that I am in the presence of a limitless strength that can barely be contained; it will require utmost skill and diligence to channel it and mold it - and direct it so that it can avoid the chasms of darkness that seem to decimate the landscapes of tomorrow - but I have every reason for renewed confidence now. There is no cause to fear the danger prophesied by some timid voices. Though a lingering weakness in my body - a holdover from the Sith-spawned battle in the Theed power station - precludes me from physically participating in his training, I choose his trainers with great deliberation; he will become a swordsman of astonishing skill in a very short time. He will be as gifted as - the best ever to take up a lightsaber within the halls of the Temple.

    Despite the fact that the other students of his age have many years of training and a wealth of experience behind them, he has already surpassed the skill level of most of them, and, as I watch him leap and twist in the final fluid movements of the Thermal Currents kata, my heart is full and aches with pride.

    His athletic abilities are virtually unprecedented at his age, and his grasp of fundamental science and mathematics - indeed of all courses that are not of an abstract nature - is quite satisfactory. And if his comprehension of the more esoteric protocols - philosophy and the liberal arts - is not so complete or so facile as - that of some others - it will all come in time. There is, after all, no rush, as he is still only nine years old.

    He will learn it all, as time goes by. I will see to that.

    He will never be rejected - or left to his own devices - or made to doubt his place in my life or in the Order of the Jedi. He will know what he is meant to be and to do. He will be my greatest achievement - and the vindication for all who opposed his training.

    He will silence all the clamoring voices.

    And if I occasionally find that Master Yoda watches my apprentice with a supreme sadness in his eyes - or occasionally regards me with dark questions for which I have no answers - I choose to reinforce my determination - and ignore the connotations.

    Anakin Skywalker - my padawan. The Chosen One.

    I confess that I am hardput not to allow myself just the smallest trace of pride - although I know it is unseemly. The accomplishments, after all, will be his own - not mine.

    Yet, I find that I cannot quite suppress a slight smugness in the knowledge that my name will forever be linked with his - t
  2. Siri_Z Jedi Knight

    Member Since:
    Jun 16, 2002
    star 3
    ...... :eek:

    Couldn't stop reading AUF and I am so luvin this!

    Siri
  3. CYNICAL21 Jedi Master

    Member Since:
    Jul 8, 2001
    star 4
    Sirs - do you like the format? I've never done first-person, present tense before - and to break it in doing it from Qui-Gon's POV - well, I think I might have just lost my mind. :eek:

    Is it working OK? I'm having a little trouble being objective on this one. Maybe I'm just a little too obsessive-compulsive over AUF.

    CYN

    BTW - more will be up in a day or so.
  4. sheleigh Jedi Master

    Member Since:
    Jan 31, 2002
    star 4
    Oh wow. [face_shocked]

    Qui-Gon's sure arrogant... pride indeed. [face_plain] I had always assumed that a Jedi wouldn't care if his name would go down in history. Apparently he does.

    As always, Cyn- excellent.
  5. ApprenticeM Jedi Master

    Member Since:
    Apr 10, 2001
    star 4
    Whoa, seems Anakin isn't the only prideful one!

    Good to see a new one from you so soon Cyn , before the withdrawal got really painful!
  6. Siri_Z Jedi Knight

    Member Since:
    Jun 16, 2002
    star 3
    Cyn the format is working perfectly. Ur lucky u can write in first! and soo well at that.

    And who ever said it was a bad thing to loose ones mind? ;)

    Keep it up... I really gotta find something new to say huh?

    Till Later~
    Siri
  7. Jedi_Nifet Jedi Master

    Member Since:
    Feb 8, 2002
    star 4
    Wow, first time I'm not late! :D

    Wonderful! The story from first person gives so much more insight into inner feelings.

    Waiting for more :)
  8. Chaos_Rose Jedi Knight

    Member Since:
    May 12, 2002
    star 3
    Oh, WOW! Now I have to go find AUF and read that...

    Great post, CYN!



  9. CYNICAL21 Jedi Master

    Member Since:
    Jul 8, 2001
    star 4
    Rose - you won't find it here - and I dare not post a link. But be warned - if you go looking (on ff.n) be prepared to invest some hefty time. When I said 400,000+ words - I wasn't joking.

    Oh, and BTW - despite the general tone and attitude of our favorite Jedi Master in this initial post (the arrogance, etc.) be aware that things are not necessarily as they seem. All will be revealed - in time. :D

    And, in case you're wondering, I do absolutely adore being the writer - and knowing in advance where this is going. [face_mischief]

    CYN
  10. CalaisKenobi Jedi Master

    Member Since:
    Jun 15, 2002
    star 4
    and to break it in doing it from Qui-Gon's POV - well, I think I might have just lost my mind

    LOL! Well, I must say, even though you have a professed dislike for Qui-Gon you are portraying him quite well. His actions and beliefs, though reprehensible, are actually understandable. (Even though I would like to injure him severely for his treatment of Obi in AUF). Speaking of that... at the end, weren't there 3 options available? Obi dies, Qui dies, neither dies? Or was it both die, as the last option? :confused:

    Here's hoping Obi lives... and I must admit, I am suspicious since someone who obviously loves Qui moved his stuff...
    Great post!
    CK
  11. CYNICAL21 Jedi Master

    Member Since:
    Jul 8, 2001
    star 4
    CK - I did mention three possibilities - Obi dies, QG dies - as per canon, and the third option was that neither dies. However, I should point out that the actual number of possibilities is infinite - and I may yet decide to write some of them.

    But, for now, I'll stick to this one - and we'll move further along with the next post. This will NOT be one of my marathon stories that drag on forever. Three or four posts should do it, I think - unless inspiration strikes and drags me all over that GFFA before letting go. :D

    Gotta run - I was late ten minutes ago. :eek:

    CYN
  12. obi_ew Force Ghost

    Member Since:
    Apr 14, 2002
    star 5
    Ok here's what I think. Not that any of you really care! Obi-wan sacrificed himself to save Qui-Gon and killed the Sith but also was killed himself.Qui-Gon's little mind has snapped from the trauma and guilt and he has completely blocked out anything to do with Obi-Wan.Hopefully the Council is going to drag him over the coals,he loeses it completely and has to be chained in a bleak,horrid mental institution for the remainder of his days! :D Oh and Yoda kills Anakin just to avenge Obi! [face_laugh] Ok I really need to go take a nap! But really Cyn I'm thrilled your posting this here.AUF was beautiful and the way it ended.. :_|
  13. Cascadia Jedi Master

    Member Since:
    Apr 15, 2002
    star 4
    Wonderfully written, CYN ! And the first-person, present tense is perfect. I was wondering about who moved Qui-Gon's things too. Could this be the ending with both Qui and Obi surviving?

    Looking forward to more!

    :)
  14. Padawan_Travina Jedi Master

    Member Since:
    Aug 5, 2002
    star 4
    CYN

    WOW! Another grest post..I really liked this..and you even made Qui-Gon seem a little bit more human...w/ the exception of his few head swelling moments..:)

    I really like the first person format here, and i am a little shocked to see it is written from Bubbleheads POV...

    I can't wait to see were this one is going to go and to find out were Obi-wan is?

    You didn't kill him now did you? Please tell me it isn't so :)

    PT
  15. TheFallen Jedi Master

    Member Since:
    Nov 27, 2001
    star 4
    :eek: I had to scroll down inch by inch because my eyes have this terrible habit of darting around during your stories and ruining the surprise.

    I just had this feeling that this was going to be posted and I darn near fell out of my chair when I saw this. Lead on, author, lead on. ;)
  16. PadawanKitara Force Ghost

    Member Since:
    Dec 31, 2001
    star 5
    Did I just hear you say that things are not as they currently seem?? Does this mean that Qui-Gon will be more (I don't think that's possible) or less arrogant than this first chapter? Or am I just suffering from lost weekend in Vegas syndrome and need about 20 hours of sleep before I re-read this 8-}
  17. Arldetta Jedi Master

    Member Since:
    Jul 19, 2002
    star 4
    Cyn, I am dying to find out which of your three options you chose for this particular piece. I like everything thus far. I just want to know what's happening with Obi-wan? PLease post again soon. :D please :_|
  18. Sugar_Bear Force Ghost

    Member Since:
    Dec 14, 2001
    star 3

    Beautifully done, but I must admit that it felt like a slap in the face and a punch in the gut everytime Qui-Gon gloated over his "chosen one", deeming him the sole worthy successor to his legacy without any thought, mention or lingering trace of Obi-Wan Kenobi.
  19. ObiLegolas Jedi Knight

    Member Since:
    May 15, 2002
    star 3
    My god! What a wonderful follow up to AUF. Although I would like it better if Obi showed up and kicked Qui's arrogant, stubborn, blind behind! That would be the ultimate payback. :p Can't wait for the next part (although I'm already ready to strangle Qui-gon). Hurry!
  20. Jovieve Jedi Master

    Member Since:
    May 19, 2002
    star 4
    Oh, Obi-ew - such an optimist.

    Yes, the Light side of me hopes Qui-Gon Dunderhead is really in psychic shock, and emotional shreds over Obi-Wan's loss and cannot bear to think of the past.

    Or hope Obi-Wan is still alive and is just - gone.

    But the Dark side of me comes from my opinion of Master Qui-Gon Jinn after reading AUF...[seethingly] "D--- him, d--- him, d--- him!!!!" :mad:

    Huff huff...oh sorry, Cyn. Forgot to add - wonderful post. 1st person is fine. Especially if a revelation is upcoming.
  21. CYNICAL21 Jedi Master

    Member Since:
    Jul 8, 2001
    star 4
    * * * * * * * * * * * *

    And we're off - with Part II. Lovely feedback, everyone - and I hope you'll continue to comment. It encourages greater effort. :D

    * * * * * * * * * * * *



    The fact that there was no one seated at the reception desk in the anteroom of the Council Chamber should have alerted me - but I was distracted, I suppose. Anakin is scheduled to begin a new round of classes just ten days from today - and I need to make sure that he is assigned to instructors who will understand and accommodate his needs. I am particularly concerned with the diversity between the two available classes on ethical theory.

    One of the courses will be taught by Knight Diartué - a Bothan adept, renowned for her facility with languages and interpretations of subliminal messages; also renowned for intimidating intelligence and a refusal to tolerate any effort less than maximum. Her students, invariably, exit her class - virtually every day - pale and discomfited. However, it is common knowledge that - at the end of the course - those self-same students exit the course with a comprehensive knowledge of the subject. She is a harsh mistress; of that, there can be no doubt - but she is also scrupulously fair, honest to a fault, and extravagant with her approval for genuine effort. She is inordinately fond of - some of her previous students - students that neither asked for, nor expected any quarter in her relentless pursuit of their learning.

    Students like . . .

    The second class will be instructed by Master E'shimavi, who is a Rhodian of advanced age - who, in fact, was my first instructor in this subject. He is a being of great gentleness - inclined to contemplation, slightly befuddled at times, but possessed of a great, compassionate heart. Understandably, he's a great favorite with the students, many of whom count on his tendency to absent-mindedness and disorganization to allow them to bluff their way through his classes. Few of his students ever receive anything less than extremely good marks.

    I suppress an urge to sigh - for I know perfectly well why this is true. As he has aged, Master E'shimavi has grown more absent-minded - and less demanding - and, while almost his entire class will complete the course with passing grades, few will have any real grasp of ethical logic.

    Admission into his class, therefore, is much desired - and is achieved on a first-come, first-served basis - unless, of course, one has some influence with the instructor - and Master E'shimavi always reserves a soft spot in his heart for prior students.

    Therefore - once I finish with whatever foolishness the Council has in mind - I will pay a call on my much-loved old teacher - and ask him to make a place for my padawan. Though some might argue that - as the Chosen One - Anakin should be able and willing to hold his own in the more rigorous of the two classes, those who would say so do not know him as I know him. It is far more important to reassure him of his place among the Jedi - to bolster his confidence in his abilities and avoid any hint of negativity - than to insist that he absorb such complex, abstract principles when, just months ago, the only ethics he concerned himself with were those necessary for staying alive and intact in the noxious belly of slavery that existed on his native world.

    I will not have him browbeaten - or cornered - or forced to concede any semblance of inferiority; his spirit is entirely too fragile to require him to deal with any of that.

    There will be time for overcoming such obstacles later, as he is still very much the young child we - I - found on Tatooine.

    I allow an image of Master E'shimavi to form in my mind - and smile to envision his gentle response to the quicksilver loveliness of my padawan. I remember how the elderly Rhodian was overcome with tender laughter at the last Winter Festival celebration, when a group of senior padawans - acting more under the influence of mulled wine than common sense - attempted to climb the monstrous jolliarcia
  22. TheFallen Jedi Master

    Member Since:
    Nov 27, 2001
    star 4
    So Obi truly is dead in this story. You chose that path, did you... I've become numb to some written words, but your writing always has the power to make my heart squeeze.
  23. Sugar_Bear Force Ghost

    Member Since:
    Dec 14, 2001
    star 3
    Honestly, it's moments like Garen facing down Qui-Gon that induce such an intense jolt of emotion from the reader that is truly the pinnacle of passionate, exquisite storytelling.
  24. Chaos_Rose Jedi Knight

    Member Since:
    May 12, 2002
    star 3
    Bloody...

    < blows nose, wipes eyes >

    Bright stars, CYN! That was wrenching - beautiful - but enough to rip your heart out. The pain of Obi's friends going uncomforted...

    I'd like to kick Qui Gon into next blasted week!

    More... PLEASE!

    And, I did find AUF and am printing a chunk of it out.



  25. Cascadia Jedi Master

    Member Since:
    Apr 15, 2002
    star 4
    :_| There are no words...

    Just can't understand the hardened heart, unless there's more than we can see.
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