Lions and tigers and padawans, oh my!

Great Story!

 

I agree with the whole zip file proposal. I think it would be very beneficial. Especially to me.

My computer is slow and it would take almost literally forever to download the movies. As you can guess I haven't even seen any of them yet.

And if it isn't possible to zip them due to quality issues then I guess I am just SOL.

 

When I used to have my 56.6, that was a major problem and I only got TROOPS off it because I read the script and I loved it. It still however took me the better part of 2-3 hours to download it. Even so, if zipped, it would still take a long time anyway for any of the big high-quality files.

Thats when I switched to cable........

 

"...and this is the Murrit enclosure." the keeper indicated with a general sweep of his arm.

Mace Windu felt as if he was glowing. Infact, he felt positively radiant. In many ways, this was his greatest triumph since he had gone from Padawan to knight.

The kids were quiet!

He'd cracked it! The little horrors were listening attentively to the animal keeper, literally hanging on his every word, excited at the chance to actually mingle with the creatures and see them face to face instead of behind a force barrier. It had taken a little persuasion on Mace's part for the eight strong private party of master and initiates to be allowed into the enclosure itself, but the keeper had taken pity on him and agreed, on condition that everyone was silent and well behaved.

The keeper had stressed the well behaved part, Windu had noticed, before fixing him with an "OR ELSE" kind of look. But then again, if you can't trust a jedi to remain calm and placid in times of chaos, who could you?

If only Qui-Gon were here to see this wonderous transformation, from hellions to little angels in one fell swoop. Mace wondered if his friend had had any luck with locating the little boy, and found himself glancing at his wrist chrono. He hoped he'd find him soon, he thought, hissing through clenched teeth. Yoda would have them dismembered if they didn't. Or worse still, assisting the temple cooks for a month...


He was brought back to the present by a quite deliberate kick to the shin. "You're not listening." the little girl hissed at him. Frowning, as he rubbed his injured leg, Mace tried for appearances sake to look interested. After all, if the kids could stay quiet, he could stay awake.

Maybe.

It appeared that they were just past the Murrit breeding season, but for as yet unexplained reasons the egg production of the impossibly hairy creatures had been extremely low.

"It's probably because we had to move them to a larger enclosure earlier in the year." explained the keeper in hushed tones. "Murrit's are very teritorial creatures. They don't like a lot of disturbance to their surrounds. We think that by moving them we may have stressed them slightly, hence the low egg production."

Sabra-Ni held up her hand to ask a question. "Why do they lay eggs? They've got fur."
The keeper smiled. "That's a good question. Usually, it's birds and reptilian creatures that lay eggs..."
"And spiders." whispered one of the older girls.
"Yes." agreed the keeper, slightly annoyed at the interuption.
"And fish." muttered another girl.
"Yes, thank you." glared the keeper, with a just-who's-the-expert-here-anyway look about him. "However, this is a prime example of how truly diverse nature is. Murrits, are warm blooded, lactating animals that just happened to lay eggs. Nobody knows why."
"Because eggs go better with toasted bread!" giggled Sabra-Ni.

Mace recalled Obi-Wan and Qui-Gon's earlier urge to hit their heads off various walls and supporting structures and found that it was all he could do to stop himself from walking over to the nearest tree to do likewise.
"Why are they so far away?" little Kelda Rosset asked in disapointment, pointing to a group of suspicious looking Murrits hovering some forty feet away.
"Well, because they don't know who you are," the keeper tried to console her gently, "They're used to myself and the other keepers, infact they're quite tame. They're hanging back to see if you're a threat to themselves and the few eggs they've managed to produce."

As he spoke, one of the male Murrits started to edge its way forward out from the tall grasses where they were congregating. For some reason Mace couldn't fathom, it seemed to have fixed its beady eyes firmly on himself...

The keeper continued cautiously, "Murrits make very protective parents. They have special grips on their feet like suckers, that help to grip hold of their eggs. They secrete a rather foul smelling glue-like substance from glands in their paws that allow them to do this. Once the Murrit father has attached himself in this way, it becomes almost impossible to remove

 

ROFLOL SERIOUSLY. That was SOOOOOOOOOO FUnny!
he thinks he is an egg. I love the slow stalking. ROFLOL I could just see it coming!

 

LOL!!! ::Holding sides:: oh my gosh I needed that laugh!! Oh man, this is HILARIOUS...what will Obi-Wan think when he finds out his master is being held for kidnapping and Master Windu is...well, waiting to hatch!! ROFL!! oh man

 

Encore! Encore! This story is great.
But I have a question. Who's going to clean up after the male murrit sitting on Mace' head?

 

ROTHFLMBO!!!! This is beyond hysterical!!! ::Hyperventilates:: *WHEEZE* *WHEEZE*

Poor Mace! Being incubated by a skunk with suction cups! I can just imagine the lost initiate being found curled up asleep with a newly adopted family of wampas...

 

Hee-hee-hee! Ah, amusement. La-lalalala-la-la!

Going nutty in shadows,
http://members.aol.com/_ht_a/phantasiav/nn5.gif

 

I don't believe this..

 

Sits reading post and begins to laugh so hard her soda comes out her nose

Well...not really...but I did almost spit it back into the glass. I pretty much choked there. The image of Mace Windu, very dignified of course, standing there with a furry animal, which I picture somewhat resembling a cross between a lemur and my cat, sitting on his head caused me to loose all control.

I love it!!!!!!

More! More!

 

"Our sneak-thief has taken the bait."

An-Paj shot out of his seat is if burned. Grabbing his cloak, he hastily made his way alross the marble floor, footsteps echoing as he moved towards the direction of the store room.

Got you now Cates, he thought, you thieving little vrelt.

Not that An-Paj didn't like Simeon. He was in most respects a hard working, indeed almost over-zealous individual, whose first concern was usually with his patients. Except that recently, his mind had been elsewhere altogether.

The healer had no direct proof that Simeon had been stealing the medicinal alcohol from the stores, but it did seem a likely bet. There was no telling how long it had being going on for, as whoever was responsible covered their trail fairly maticulously. But this time, An-Paj would put a stop to it once and for all. He grinned.

It had been one of Yoda's more enterprising ideas.

Hurrying towards his colleague who was awaiting An-Paj's arrival, he subconciously rubbed his hands in glee. He would need proof of guilt.

And this time he would have it.

I'll show you what true misery's really like, Simeon. By the time Yoda and I are finished with you, you'll be begging to go to Bandomeer.

Ferdi Xadani met him by the door. "Look. He's replaced it with a flagon of water." she smiled. "Oldest trick in the book."
"Hmmm." nodded An-Paj. "He won't be up to playing tricks of any kind for a long time, let me tell you."

She looked at him suspiciously. "What have you done?"
"It was Yoda's idea, really. I can't take any credit." He smiled enigmatically. "I informed our resourceful friend that we had a thief in our midst, and he suggested that we add a little something to make his drink a bit more interesting. Oh, nothing harmful, I asure you. In small doses, it'll just give him a bit of a green-ish coloring. And maybe a slight belly ache."

She stared at An-Paj. "How did you know he'd take the right one?"
"I doctored the lot." An-Paj said simply. "There's plenty more where that came from."

Padawan Healer Dimallie caught up with them outside the door. "Did it work?" she breathed in anticipation.
"Apparently so. Provided you dosed them as I said, I think we'll have no problems picking the guilty party out."
"Oh, yes," she smiled, delighted at being able to assist the great An-Paj, "I put in three heaped spoonfuls of Sandolamide, just as you said."
"Between all the flagons?" An-Paj somehow felt the need to reassure himself. He had a very bad feeling...
"No...in each of them. Wasn't that what you wanted?" Alarm seemed to root her tongue to the roof of her mouth.

"In each of them." repeated An-Paj.
"Yes." she swallowed.

An hour seemed to pass as An-Paj stared ahead of him at nothing in particular.

Finally, he pulled out his com-link.

"Master Yoda? I think we have a problem."
****************

"Bad news, this is." Yoda frowned.
"Indeed, Master."
"Harmful, it is?"
"Master, not to put too fine a point on it, if he drinks the whole lot he's going to be up there flying with the Mynocks. I warned you how strong it was."
"True, this is."
"Not to mention the fact that the coloring will probably take months to fade from his skin."
"Serve him right, it will!"
"Maybe. But Master, I am a healer. I'm supposed to make people better, not make them ill. I'm sure the jedi council has rules against poisoning padawans."
"Know some who would benefit from it, I do." muttered Yoda.
"Master?!"
"Joking, I was."

An-Paj pursed his lips. "I hadn't really expected to have to do another padawan stomach pumping exercise, which is what this is going to turn out to be if we can't get hold of Master Jinn and Master Windu."

He cut the connection off quickly. It was not one of the most glorious moments in An-Paj's glittering career.

Yoda snorted, annoyed. Yet another person had put him on their hit list. He decided that now would be a very good time to practise that cough he was trying earlier...
*************

"This thing's getting very hot." Windu complained.
"I don't know what to do."
The keeper wrung his hands. A small gathering had congregated around the s

 

"Our sneak-thief has taken the bait."

An-Paj shot out of his seat is if burned. Grabbing his cloak, he hastily made his way alross the marble floor, footsteps echoing as he moved towards the direction of the store room.

Got you now Cates, he thought, you thieving little vrelt.

Not that An-Paj didn't like Simeon. He was in most respects a hard working, indeed almost over-zealous individual, whose first concern was usually with his patients. Except that recently, his mind had been elsewhere altogether.

The healer had no direct proof that Simeon had been stealing the medicinal alcohol from the stores, but it did seem a likely bet. There was no telling how long it had being going on for, as whoever was responsible covered their trail fairly maticulously. But this time, An-Paj would put a stop to it once and for all. He grinned.

It had been one of Yoda's more enterprising ideas.

Hurrying towards his colleague who was awaiting An-Paj's arrival, he subconciously rubbed his hands in glee. He would need proof of guilt.

And this time he would have it.

I'll show you what true misery's really like, Simeon. By the time Yoda and I are finished with you, you'll be begging to go to Bandomeer.

Ferdi Xadani met him by the door. "Look. He's replaced it with a flagon of water." she smiled. "Oldest trick in the book."
"Hmmm." nodded An-Paj. "He won't be up to playing tricks of any kind for a long time, let me tell you."

She looked at him suspiciously. "What have you done?"
"It was Yoda's idea, really. I can't take any credit." He smiled enigmatically. "I informed our resourceful friend that we had a thief in our midst, and he suggested that we add a little something to make his drink a bit more interesting. Oh, nothing harmful, I asure you. In small doses, it'll just give him a bit of a green-ish coloring. And maybe a slight belly ache."

She stared at An-Paj. "How did you know he'd take the right one?"
"I doctored the lot." An-Paj said simply. "There's plenty more where that came from."

Padawan Healer Dimallie caught up with them outside the door. "Did it work?" she breathed in anticipation.
"Apparently so. Provided you dosed them as I said, I think we'll have no problems picking the guilty party out."
"Oh, yes," she smiled, delighted at being able to assist the great An-Paj, "I put in three heaped spoonfuls of Sandolamide, just as you said."
"Between all the flagons?" An-Paj somehow felt the need to reassure himself. He had a very bad feeling...
"No...in each of them. Wasn't that what you wanted?" Alarm seemed to root her tongue to the roof of her mouth.

"In each of them." repeated An-Paj.
"Yes." she swallowed.

An hour seemed to pass as An-Paj stared ahead of him at nothing in particular.

Finally, he pulled out his com-link.

"Master Yoda? I think we have a problem."
****************

"Bad news, this is." Yoda frowned.
"Indeed, Master."
"Harmful, it is?"
"Master, not to put too fine a point on it, if he drinks the whole lot he's going to be up there flying with the Mynocks. I warned you how strong it was."
"True, this is."
"Not to mention the fact that the coloring will probably take months to fade from his skin."
"Serve him right, it will!"
"Maybe. But Master, I am a healer. I'm supposed to make people better, not make them ill. I'm sure the jedi council has rules against poisoning padawans."
"Know some who would benefit from it, I do." muttered Yoda.
"Master?!"
"Joking, I was."

An-Paj pursed his lips. "I hadn't really expected to have to do another padawan stomach pumping exercise, which is what this is going to turn out to be if we can't get hold of Master Jinn and Master Windu."

He cut the connection off quickly. It was not one of the most glorious moments in An-Paj's glittering career.

Yoda snorted, annoyed. Yet another person had put him on their hit list. He decided that now would be a very good time to practise that cough he was trying earlier...
*************

"This thing's getting very hot." Windu complained.
"I don't know what to do."
The keeper wrung his hands. A small gathering had congregated around the s

 

So good she posted twice...sorry, friends. The Jemster messed up!

 

Ohh this just gets better and better. Obi-Wan isn't going to be feeling so well is he. OH I can see it now. Obi is flying high on drug overdose and they do all sorts of crazy things. ROFLOL

 

Tee-hee-hee

Green like Yoda they will be.

 

LOL!! Poor Obi-Wan's innocent and is going to need his stomach pumped again??? Priceless!!

 

"Look, I'm telling you the truth."

Qui-Gon Jinn could not believe the bizarre, not to mention downright embarrassing turn for the worse his fortune had taken in the last hour or so. His eyes were shut tight in a mixture of disbelief and frustration. No matter what he did, or how he explained it, his questioners were not interested in learning the truth. It was a closed subject; as far as they were concerned, he was guilty as charged.

And he was deep in Bantha dung.

At the back of his mind, several strains of thought seemed to crash off one another simultaneously, causing a dread to spill over into his present predicament. A lot was going on here... Mace Windu sometimes managed to find trouble in the most unusual circumstances. Obi-Wan seemed to attract it like a magnate! And Jemmiah...she had a tendency to court trouble as if it were a way of life! The thought made Qui-Gon edgy. The fact that she was here had to be more than a mere coincidence and he didn't like it one little bit. Then of course, there was the problem of the missing child. Yoda would be heartily displeased. The temple could not afford another scandal, not after that "indecent exposure" incident. Qui-Gon would never get onto the jedi council now.

He smiled. Something good had come from today's little escapade after all.

He brushed the thought away from his mind and reprimanded himself for allowing it to surface in such a potentially crucial situation. He was forever admonishing his Padawan for not focusing on the present, and here HE was, allowing the force currents not merely to guide him but to plague him with those infernal "bad feelings" his apprentice seemed to complain of on a regular basis. Qui-Gon wrapped himself within the living force and breathed deeply.

The bad feeling remained.

His tormentors looked at him scathingly from across a small table, clearly trying to intimidate him.

"Sure," said the burly, balding man who had helped to march him to the detention area. "You're a jedi. So you keep saying." He gestured to another of the on duty security men standing behind his shoulder, making little circular movements by the side of his head. "We've got a right lunatic here, Charnan."
"Looks like it." grinned the other man, who seemed to be enjoying the whole affair. The burly man leaned back in towards Qui-Gon. "Know what I think?"
"Tell me." sighed Jinn.
"I think that if YOU'RE a jedi", he waved to a nearby enclosure outside of the building, "I'M a pile of Gundark manure."
"Interesting point of comparison." Qui-Gon said neutrally.
"Don't get smart, mister. You're in plenty of trouble as it is without digging a deeper hole for yourself. We don't much care for child abductors on Coruscant."
"Nor should you. But I'm not a child abductor," Qui-Gon repeated for the umpteenth time, "I'm a..."
"A jedi knight." The security man interrupted. "Yes, we've heard it all before."
"And yet you don't believe me."

The man folded his arms and sat back in his chair, studying him. "No way are you a jedi. You're hair's far to long. Whoever heard of a jedi with long hair? Any longer and you could be mistaken for my sister. Minus the beard, of course."

Qui-Gon's irritation grew stronger at the flippancy. "Why won't you listen to me?"
The security man scratched an armpit, considering. "O.K. If you're a jedi knight, then you could say, for example...levitate that crate of frozen fish out in the yard there."
Qui-gon looked out the window to where two workers were helping unload a transport of its crates.
"I could." He replied placidly, looking directly at the man's face.
"Well, go on then."
Jinn shook his head. "That would be a frivolous use of the force."

The man smirked. "Is that right? All right, then. How about we contact the jedi temple and ask them if they're missing a jedi master?"

Qui-Gon tried to push down the growing bile he felt gathering in his stomach. There was no way he wanted ANYONE at the temple to find out. Especially not Yoda.

"I'd rather you didn't." He replied, some of the famous Jinn cool beginning to evaporate.
"I wonder why."

The man

 

"...one dancing girl short of a Hutt's harem..."

I love your use of language and the way the situations just keeping building up and building up and getting worse and worse! I can't wait to see what happens next!

 

LOL, this is a snowball if I've ever seen one! If Qui-Gon was worried about kitchen duty, he can forget it!! He, Mace, Obi-Wan, and Simeon are going to be changing little Jedi diapers in the nursery for years!! ROFLOL!!

[This message has been edited by Knight Obi Wan (edited 03-16-2000).]

 

"There's too much blood in my alcohol stream."
LOL!

Keep it coming!

 

Well, I agree that zipped files would make things easier, but there is other way?
One way is programs like Get Right, that make lager downloads very easier.
Take a look; I like this program very much.
It can be available at http://www.getright.comwww.getright.com

 

up!

 

Mace could feel rather than see the ever-growing presence of the onlookers on both sides of the Murrit enclosure, catching the hushed muttering and covert whispers from the gathering crowds.

And the laughter.

Oh, he'd heard THAT all right. It was extremely difficult, he thought, to retain any semblance of dignity when you had a large, smelly creature composed almost entirely of hair trying to win the Coruscant Zoo Parent of the decade award by taking up residence where he wasn't wanted. And Mace had to hand it to this fella'; he'd really forged a strong relationship with the top of his head.

Every few seconds, the jedi's thoughts turned to Qui-Gon Jinn. Like where was he now? Where was the missing child?

And how long would it be before Mace could give him a good kicking?

Damn him for leaving him like this! All he'd done was shown a little bit of enterprise, and what did he get for all his pains? A furry *** hanging over his face.

He hadn't realized initially which end was which, but any confusion on the matter ended very swiftly for him when the keepers had, after huddling in a tight scrum to discuss their plans - not that they seemed to have any - retreated round his back with a large stem of Dilarberries to tempt it off his head. But the greatest plans of Murrits and men seemed doomed to go spectacularly awry when the berries had produced the inevitable consequences. Yes, if he'd had any doubts about what end he was facing, they stopped there. His one consolation was that nobody could see his face.

That had seemed such a long time ago now, and Windu cursed with all his might his ill luck. It happened every time he and Qui-Gon went out socially. They would both get into trouble, yet Qui-Gon would always come out smelling of rose petals. He always came out smelling of...

In this case, quite literally.

More ruminations from the keepers drifted his way, but from what Mace could gather they didn't seem to have any new light to shed on the case. His nosed twitched, and he felt the urge to sneeze.

Trust me to be allergic to Murrit hair, he thought.

Despite his quivering nose, Mace thought he could smell something other than Murrit hair and excrement and the faint brush in his mind of another presence just by his shoulder. A non jedi mind.

"Why are you still here?" he spat, fury coloring his voice at the continued torment that only this particular being could bring.

Jemmiah pouted. "That's nice, I must say."
Ever since the keepers had let her in to the enclosure, Jemmy's inventive Corellian mind had been working overtime to come up with a solution to Mace's problem. She liked Mace. Even if she liked the new hairy Mace even better.

"I thought you could do with some moral support."
He swallowed, guilty for snapping at her. "I'm sorry for being abrupt. It's just that I'm not at my best at the moment."
"I can imagine the views not very stimulating either." he heard the muffled reply through his tangle of newly acquired hair.
"Not unless I was another Murrit, no." muttered Windu. "I mean it. Thanks for staying."

THAT'S MORE THAN CAN BE SAID FOR SOME PEOPLE, he thought.

"That's OK."

Mace heard the Murrit yawn. "It's getting rather settled, I'm afraid." Jemmiah tried to find a suitable level of gravitas in her voice, and failed miserably. Mace didn't answer at first. And when he did, he didn't sound pleased.

"Perhaps you should go and keep an eye on the kids." He stated. "Take them round the rest of the zoo."
"Why? They seem to be having a very good time as it is."
"Is that right."
"Oh, yes. Infact, young Sabra-Ni said she hadn't ever had such a good time."

Mace growled. "Weren't you meant to meet Obi-Wan?"
The young lady nodded, blinking those large copper eyes that seemed to have such an effect on everyone. "I'll find him. But this is much more entertaining."

Mace sighed. If only they'd taught him this sort of thing at the temple. But there had been no suggestions as what to do when a wild animal glued itself rear first to your face. He made a mental note to ask Yoda to include it in further survival train

 

ROFLOL That is SOOOOO funny. You are soo good at this Jemmiah! LOL I'm laughing right along with Qui-Gon. heeheeheeheeehee
Boy are they going to be a sorry sight when they all get back to the temple. heeheeheeeheehee
And is that girl Uh going to have a baby???