Amph List your favorite movies of 2013

Discussion in 'Community' started by Jabbadabbado, Dec 3, 2013.

  1. I Are The Internets Chosen One

    Member Since:
    Nov 20, 2012
    star 7
    Alright here goes:

    The Excellent (4.5-5 stars)
    12 Years a Slave
    Captain Phillips
    The Hunger Games: Catching Fire
    Gravity
    Despicable Me 2
    Monster's University
    Man of Steel
    Prisoners
    Thor: The Dark World
    Oblivion
    The Wolverine
    Quartet
    The Way Way Back

    The Great (4 stars)
    Iron Man 3
    Star Trek Into Darkness
    Fast and Furious 6
    The Conjuring
    Pacific Rim
    Pain and Gain
    Jack the Giant Slayer
    Oz the Great and Powerful
    The Last Stand
    Ender's Game
    This is the End
    The Heat

    The Good (3-3.5 stars)
    Now You See Me
    The Hangover Part III
    Side Effects
    World War Z
    Elysium
    Olympus Has Fallen
    Don Jon
    Carrie
    G.I. Joe: Retaliation

    The OK (2-2.5 stars)
    Gangster Squad
    Epic

    Abysmal (0-1.5 stars)
    Identity Thief
    A Haunted House
    Only God Forgives

    I'll continue to update this as I go.
  2. Rogue1-and-a-half Manager Emeritus who is writing his masterpiece

    Member Since:
    Nov 2, 2000
    star 7
    Okay, I wanna do five at a time and I'm going to use my ten-word movie review format. And, oh, yes, I consider my "year of movies" to be all movies I saw in a particular year, so there's a lot of old movies on this list. Starting at the bottom:


    Bad – “Nope.”

    Blue Caprice (2013) – Alexandre Moors - *
    Washington Beltway snipers terrorize public.
    Relentlessly shallow despite promising insights.

    Chopping Mall (Killbots) (1986) – Jim Wynorski - *
    Teenagers battle robots in mall.
    Occasionally funny-bad; mostly just bad.


    Awful – “No way.”

    Risky Business (1983) – Paul Brickman – ½
    Straight-arrow kid encounters hooker, chaos.
    Completely unfunny; offensive; incoherent message.

    The To Do List (2013) – Maggie Carey – ½
    Virgin seeks sexual experience, stat.
    Raunchy comedy isn’t either one.

    Horrendous – “Never never never oh God no.”

    Museum Hours (2012) – Jem Cohen – 0
    Two people connect in Vienna.
    Art-house cinema at its worst.
    CloneUncleOwen likes this.
  3. Chewgumma Chosen One

    Member Since:
    Apr 14, 2009
    star 7
    Indeed, who can forget such amazing dialogue like "OWOOOOOOOOOOOOO!! OW, OW, OW, OWOOOOOOOOOOOOO!!!"

    I liked Gravity for the ride it provided. However it was little more than the thinking man's dumb blockbuster. It had no real plot to speak of, and what little that was there was just an excuse to blow stuff up.
    Last edited by Chewgumma, Dec 6, 2013
    Bacon164 likes this.
  4. Darth_Invidious Chosen One

    Member Since:
    Jun 21, 1999
    star 5
  5. VadersLaMent Chosen One

    Member Since:
    Apr 3, 2002
    star 9
    Oh right, because that's all the dialogue there was and she displayed no emotion at all.
  6. Rogue1-and-a-half Manager Emeritus who is writing his masterpiece

    Member Since:
    Nov 2, 2000
    star 7
    Gravity would have been better with substantially less dialogue. Everyone apparently forgot that you can communicate information and show emotion without words in that last third of the movie. And that people completely and totally alone tend to use no words. The movie would have gotten a full extra half-star from me if they'd just not had Bullock spouting exposition into the empty air for the last half hour or so. God, she would not shut up.

    Case in point: she literally barked like a dog. When your damn characters are literally barking like dogs, you need to realize that they should probably just shut up for a while. You're reaching for something to fill silence at that point. God, barking like a dog. That scene made me feel literally humiliated for her. Bullock deserved better.
  7. Chewgumma Chosen One

    Member Since:
    Apr 14, 2009
    star 7
    Exactly. For all the incredible special effects within it, Gravity displays an inability to grasp the concept that film is a visual medium.

    I really wanted to love Gravity. I was incredibly hyped for it. I adored the concept and am a huge fan of Alfonso Cuaron's Children of Men. But it just fell incredibly flat thanks to the god awful script.
  8. I Are The Internets Chosen One

    Member Since:
    Nov 20, 2012
    star 7
    Hey I bark like a dog during stressful situations!
    Rogue1-and-a-half likes this.
  9. Sarge Chosen One

    Member Since:
    Oct 4, 1998
    star 4
    If you didn't get the pathos and desperation of the barking scene, I pity you. You missed out on one of the most emotional moments of the movie.
    Volderon and VadersLaMent like this.
  10. VadersLaMent Chosen One

    Member Since:
    Apr 3, 2002
    star 9
    Rather than just LIKE this I decided to LIKE and quote it too as a double wammy about its accuracy.
  11. Slowpokeking Jedi Grand Master

    Member Since:
    Sep 21, 2012
    star 4
    I really like Blue Jasmine a lot, then it's Pacific Rim and MoS.
  12. Sarge Chosen One

    Member Since:
    Oct 4, 1998
    star 4
    TRIPLE whammy!!! =D=^:)^[face_flag]
    FRAGWAGON, Volderon and VadersLaMent like this.
  13. Bacon164 Force Ghost

    Member Since:
    Mar 22, 2005
    star 7
    I don't think anyone critiquing that moment lacks the intellectual capacity to "get" what was conveyed.
    Chewgumma and Adam of Nuchtern like this.
  14. EmpireForever Chosen One

    Member Since:
    Mar 15, 2004
    star 8
    DID YOU GIUSE SEE THE BUDDHA? REINCARNATION! REBIRTH! HOLD STILL OR THE SLEDGEHAMMER WILL MISS YOUR SKULL
    Chewgumma likes this.
  15. Darth Guy Chosen One

    Member Since:
    Aug 16, 2002
    star 10
    I do agree that the script was lacking and the symbolism was heavy-handed, but God, after wading through things the Marvelverse and Star Trek Into Darkness and generic-dystopia-with-fading-star-in-the-lead for years it was nice to see a successful sci-fi film that tried something different and wasn't an assembly-lined cash grab.
    Last edited by Darth Guy, Dec 6, 2013
  16. Rogue1-and-a-half Manager Emeritus who is writing his masterpiece

    Member Since:
    Nov 2, 2000
    star 7
    I IS STOOPID :p

    I got what it was trying to do, but it just felt stupid to me. I loved the first third of the movie and quite liked the second third. But that last third is brutal. Bullock has the chops to sell all the requisite emotions without having to resort to speechifying. Surely no one will defend, "It's been a hell of a ride." I mean, really? And things like Bullock pushing a button that makes all the lights come on and the engine start AND informing us that it's the power button. I know it's the power button, thanks. Jesus.

    But I see what @Darth Guy is getting at. I mean, it was a bold film and, at least in part, my extreme dislike of the last third is exacerbated by just how good the first two thirds were. I mean, the special effects were amazing; and all the free floating stuff was incredibly suspenseful. It just petered out there at the end is all. I forget for sure; I think I gave it three stars in my year end review.
  17. duende Force Ghost

    Member Since:
    Apr 28, 2006
    star 5
    ok now i want to see this movie just so i can pass judgement on this doggie scene.
  18. epic Ex Mod / RSA

    Member Since:
    Jul 4, 1999
    star 7
    has anyone said blue is the warmest colour yet? i mean it does have lesbians in it.
  19. duende Force Ghost

    Member Since:
    Apr 28, 2006
    star 5
  20. Rogue1-and-a-half Manager Emeritus who is writing his masterpiece

    Member Since:
    Nov 2, 2000
    star 7
    I saw it. I give it a solid *** 1/2 stars. Out of ****. It was very, very good. Exarchopoulos and Seydoux were phenomenal in the leads. And, amazingly, at three hours, it never felt long. It didn't get a perfect four stars from me because some of the love scenes, particularly a really, really long shot of the two of them kissing, felt prurient, like the director was just kind of pausing to indulge his fantasies. The infamous sex scenes were definitely worthy of an NC-17. I'm no prude, but I'm an American and I can't help the Puritan streak that informs our culture. Suffice it to say, it was very awkward to watch two completely nude women perform seven minutes of very loud and very graphic oral sex on each other. The scissoring scene was mercifully shorter. I think they were supposed to be erotic and in France they probably were, but I was blushing into the darkness by the time some of the scenes were over.

    And here's my next five!


    Bad – “Nope.”


    No (2012) – Pablo Larrain - *
    Political ads turn the tide.
    Should have been a documentary.



    Below Average – "Don’t bother.”

    The Dark Knight Rises (2012) – Christopher Nolan - * ½
    Bane, Batman and Catwoman clash.
    Biggest movie disappointment in years.

    Elysium (2013) – Neill Blomkamp - * ½
    Social sci-fi considers wealth gap.
    Idiotic message, characterizations; fantastic effects.

    John Dies at the End (2012) – Don Coscarelli - * ½
    Aliens, monsters, demons use drugs.
    The title isn’t even true.

    Red 2 (2013) – Dean Parisot - * ½
    Retired agents into breach again.
    Sporadically amusing, but generally dull.
  21. Drac39 Force Ghost

    Member Since:
    Jul 9, 2002
    star 6
    I can't think of a single film released in 2013 which I have seen that I thought wasn't overwhelmingly mediocre. So choosing a favorite is going to be a tough one.

    I suppose if I had to narrow it down to what I thought was my favorite film of the year I'd go with the remake of 'Maniac'. I thought it's thematic conceit was shot brilliantly and the film tried to do new things which is more than can be said about pretty much every other horror film made these days. I also give it kudos for being brave enough to actually address one of the hugest detractions from horror films. People claim that horror fans want to subconsciously live through the horror. 'Maniac' actually does this and you get to see the warped mind of this character. It's not romantic or theatrical in many places.

    While I have some trouble naming my favorite I can easily name the worst film of 2013 though and that is 'The Great Gatsby'. Here is my in-depth review from imdb

    'The Great Gatsby' lacks any subtly whatsoever. Baz Luhrmann has turned Fitzgerald's masterpiece into a showy cartoon with extravagance but no taste. One wonders if Luhrmann even began to skim across the surface of what Fitzgerald's masterwork was even about. Luhrmann's film is all about spectacle and superficiality, Fitzgerald's novel blatantly attacks such concepts in search of deeper significance.

    This film is a cartoon. That's all there is to it. Everything is so tremendously fake from the decor to the acting. I am of the opinion that 'Gatsby' is a work that cannot be successfully translated to the film without losing it's impact. The joy of Fitzgerald's novel is it's beautiful prose and symbolic poetry which a filmmaker like Luhrmann is not interested in. Luhrmann is in love with the exciting visuals of the roaring twenties. Fitzgerald is often considered the epitome of the roaring twenties but what is often forgotten is that 'Gatsby' does not celebrate such a lifestyle. It is a story about facades and the facade of the roaring twenties that Luhrmann is so interested in hides pain and insecurity. The film moves at a break neck pace too and Fitzgerald's words are brushed over before one has a chance to comprehend them. Luhrmann does however offer us plenty of time to absorb long drawn out party sequences which are loud but are never visually interesting or well choreographed.

    The actors buy into Luhrmann's vision to a tee. They are all very fake and superficial. I felt as if I were watching a Saturday Night Live episode parodying Gatsby. Every member of the main cast excluding DiCaprio gives a performance in the vein of some stock view of what these times and ideas represented. The actresses I feel are particularly bad as they seem to overplay the sexuality of these characters. All the actors throw everything out and there is nothing beneath the surface of any of these performances. They are just really playing flapper dress up. If Isla Fisher were playing a larger role than Myrtle Wilson than I would say her performance is bad enough to ruin her career.

    DiCaprio is good as Gatsby and saves the film from a bomb rating. He seems to be the only one to explore the nuances of his character. Luhrmann's only exploration of Fitzgerald's gift for metaphor and allegory is the obvious notion of the 'green light'. DiCaprio tries his hardest to give it weight and is wonderfully awkward and shy around Daisy. Any power this theme and character would have is ruined by how blatantly Luhrmann robs the metaphor of any mystery by his over the top sweeping shots of the distance between the two eggs.

    Tobey Maguire is too much of a boy to play Nick Carraway but to be fair Luhrmann's vision of the character is deeply flawed. Luhrmann already hinders the character by building a stupid dramatic conceit in having him tell Gatsby's tale from a mental institution. The experience of the story is a somber character building one and Carraway is supposed to become aware of the world through it. Luhrmann's choice really ruins the whole story as it suggests that Carraway's loss of innocence and faith in the world is unique. One of the joys of Gatsby is it's cynical view of the world and how Gatsby's hope is supposed to mean something profound in a world that crushes such ideas.

    The film will no doubt bring 'Gatsby' to a new audience but I fear that it is an audience that will not understand it's importance and lose it's self in Luhrmann's silly music video parties instead of Fitzgerald's epic. If Luhrmann's film inspires someone to pick up Fitzgerald's novel than I suppose it has some worth but otherwise this is a waste of celluloid.
  22. I Are The Internets Chosen One

    Member Since:
    Nov 20, 2012
    star 7
    I loved The Great Gatsby because it's so bizarre and gonzo, and the best adaptation of the source material thus far.
    Bacon164 likes this.
  23. AaylaSecurOWNED Force Ghost

    Member Since:
    May 19, 2005
    star 6
    While I think it's fair that the movie would have been more powerful with considerably less dialogue in the last act, I also don't agree that "people completely and totally alone tend to use no words" and I don't think it's necessarily true that it would have been more realistic if she had been more silent.

    I talk through things aloud when I'm on my own all the time, and I have friends and family that I've heard doing the same. Speaking out loud is really helpful for problem solving and critical thinking (one of the main reasons talk therapy is effective) , and I personally find it helpful just talking through what I'm doing when I'm stressed or trying to solve a problem. When trying to understand difficult concepts in school I definitely used to talk through the solutions to word problems out loud, a lot like Bullock's character did when she was reading through the instruction booklets and found the power button. I didn't think of that dialogue as useless exposition, I actually found it to be a signifier of just how much stress and anxiety the character was under. Okay, the barking and the "hell of a ride" were both weak moments, but I don't think the majority of the dialogue in that act was unmerited.
  24. EmpireForever Chosen One

    Member Since:
    Mar 15, 2004
    star 8
    I use words when I'm alone all the time. In fact I probably use more words when I'm alone than otherwise.
    MrZAP likes this.
  25. tom Chosen One

    Member Since:
    Mar 14, 2004
    star 6
    i actually got the feeling that bullock's character wasn't really that kind of person, but she kept talking because george clooney told her to and then he died.
    Rogue1-and-a-half likes this.