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  1. In Memory of LAJ_FETT: Please share your remembrances and condolences HERE

SWRPF Archive *~*-Lord-Vader- RPG-*~*

Discussion in 'Star Wars Role Playing Archive' started by -Lord-Vader-, Jul 14, 2004.

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  1. darth_nemisis

    darth_nemisis Jedi Grand Master star 6

    Registered:
    May 15, 2004
    IC: Nemisis

    Pulls out both his lightsabers, but doesn't ignite the beam of energy. "Hey...are you threatening me? I am trained by the most dangerous man alive. Okay?"

    He turned and walked faster, then stopped and said," Hey Bu..uh..Spidey, sorry. We need to work together."

    tag:Spidey
     
  2. Evil Incarnate

    Evil Incarnate Jedi Grand Master star 6

    Registered:
    Aug 18, 2003
    IC: Spider-Man

    "Yes! we do"

    Spider dtarts to walk with Nemisis...

    "By the Way! If your master is a Retard, then how is he the most deadly man alive?"

    TAG: Nemisis
     
  3. darth_nemisis

    darth_nemisis Jedi Grand Master star 6

    Registered:
    May 15, 2004
    IC: Nemisis

    "He ain't always like that. Just most of the time. Watch this, I love having control of my own ship"

    He walked over to one of the commanders, "WHAT ARE YOU LOOKING AT? PLOT A COARSE FOR HOTH YOU PIECE OF CRAP! GET GOING! NOW!"

    The commanders face went white and he squirmed away and gave the orders. "Hehehe"


    TAG: Spidey
     
  4. Evil Incarnate

    Evil Incarnate Jedi Grand Master star 6

    Registered:
    Aug 18, 2003
    IC: Spider-Man

    "You treated him like dirt!.... I like it!"

    TAG: Nemisis
     
  5. -Lord-Vader-

    -Lord-Vader- Jedi Knight star 5

    Registered:
    Jan 15, 2003
    IC as Winston Churchill:

    Winston managed to sqeeze through the door after smearing several pounds of lard all over his body. But when he did finally squeeze through, he fell onto his back with his legs in the air.

    "I seem to have fallen and I can't get up!"


    Tag: Anyone


    IC as Frodo Baggins:


    Frodo came back to life after being killed by Mon Mothma twice.

    "She isnt very nice is she?" he whispered to Pot. After Frodo re-attached some of the limbs, he started looking around for his lost ring while whistling that fat dwarf's song, "hi-ho".

    As soon as he had started whistling that awful song, seven fat, grey bearded men came marching in and started looking for the ring of power. They looked under everything, including NP's bottom. (hehe)

    After each one came up empty handed, they walked over to the ugly Frodo, shrugged their shoulders, and filed out of the room as quickly and quietly (which wasnt very quiet) as they entered.

    "That was interesting..."



    Tag: 7-7-7, Pot, Naboosprincess

    ooc: Now 7-7-7, thats the kind of role playing that I recently told people not to do.
     
  6. ConcordDawn

    ConcordDawn Jedi Master star 4

    Registered:
    Jun 28, 2004
    IC as Mr. T

    After parking his ship in a nearby valley, Mr. T crawled commando-style up the ridge to the entrance to the Rebel base. Suddenly, seven short, fat people walked out of the base. Mr. T could hear them talking:

    "...really sucks that we couldn't find the ring. Dangit, now we'll never rule Middle Hoth..."

    Once the little people were gone, T crept into the concrete structure. He snuck to the doorframe of a large room and heard talking inside.

    "That was interesting..." said a squeaky, high voice. Who the helluva's got a helium tank in there? Mr. T thought.

    Then he remembered that Loser Baggins or whoever Orange was talking about. It must be that hobbit!

    Mr. T readied his gold chain whip and pulled out an Explosive Mr. T Chia Pet (c). Then he slid the Chia Pet (c) into the room, straight toward Loser Baggins and the others.
     
  7. Protege-of-Thrawn

    Protege-of-Thrawn Manager Emeritus star 6 VIP - Former Mod/RSA

    Registered:
    Mar 14, 2001
    In teh Plot house of PoT with teh princess and hobbits and ambigous other guy whose character I forgot to read about but is controlled by 777 who seems quite a jolly fellow so he can stay

    Pot was worried at all the people in his house were he kept his PLOT. He especially didn't like this hobbit fellow who looked, sounded and acted in a way Pot knew was synonymous with SIN. This could not be tolerated in the lands ruled by the Empire: the terrible institution atop now ruled the evil military rulers so like the godsquad enemy of old.

    But Huggard would rise up soon. His followers would rule these lands, smashing the power of the enemy, dashing their spirits and crushing their spines until they snivelled and squirmed in servitude to their new divine Huggardic rulers.

    But not yet, not yet. And until the day of reckoning came, he could not let in ire or suspicion fall on his innocuously named Plot house of Pot. and as this hobbit limply wristed his way through the house - dividing pot's attention between he and the strange fellow playing ping pong in the corner - pot vaguely wondered how they had bloody found their way into his house anyway.

    "You!" he thundered, looking around in fear. "What if they come damnit? What if they come and demand their money?" he looked around feverishly, eating some more of the yard mushrooms he had picked last evening. Strange and terrible things were occuring all around him. He felt a creeping, paralyzing fear as the blood dripped down the falls and onto the floor, and the hobbit sprouted wings and began to fly like a scorpion wouldn't, confusing the poor huggard even more.

    "G*dd*mn animals!" he cried, choked with fear, gathering his bag. "I'm going to go go and buy some damned golfshoes. I'll destroy the railroads yet!"

    Fear grasped at his heart, followed by a rush of intense loathing. Had he spoken outloud? Had they heard him?
    Were they coming?

    "Err...forget it. It never happened...you...you take care, of everything! you hear me?!" he turned to the princess nearby.

    "You empress, you can take care of my house? yes? good. GOOD! good." he was disturbed somewhat by what the empress looked like, as he looked closely she changed into a horrific creature.

    [image=http://www.acad.ca/2002GraduatesCatalogue/visualcommunicationsdesign/olson_copy.jpg]

    The imperative to leave was immeadiate. Gathering his bag, his nuclear bomb disguised as a typewriter, gardening utensils, money, hat and evil cane of doom and despairTM, he dashed out of the room, leaning against the door to gather his bearings and allow the camera to get a shot of his profile.

    [image=http://www.thespiannet.com/actors/D/depp_johnny/fllv.jpg]

    Getting into the car, he found a friendly samoan, and began to drive.

    Knowing that samoans were inheritly a trustworthy lot, his fear about the coming mission began to diminish. If you can't trust a samoan, who can you trust? The answer had disturbingly been answered back at his plot house with the strange minority activist hobbit, ambigious ping pong player and seemingly innocent princess that had morphed into a warped miasma of color and despairing evil.

    It was a plot. They were onto him. He knew it.

    "But...we must destroy the railroads!" he declared, thundering to the universe.
    He looked to his left, and noticed that the samoan was asleep, or in a coma. A good man, he thought. It was important to sleep and get rest before such a big operation.

    [image=http://www.cnn.com/SHOWBIZ/Movies/9805/21/fear.loathing/5.JPG]

    checking his typewriter bomb, he sighed satisfied, as they continued to drive.

    Soon, he'd find the railroad. Soon, everything would change.

    TAG: Anyone.
     
  8. darth_nemisis

    darth_nemisis Jedi Grand Master star 6

    Registered:
    May 15, 2004
    IC: Nemisis

    "You treated him like dirt!.... I like it!"

    "Darn right I did. You should try it too. It's fun. They have to listen, because we are in command of this ship." He walked over to a different guy this time. "HEY! WHAT ARE YOU DOING JUST STANDING THERE!?! GET ME SOME COFFEE!" He turned back to Spidey, "Want anything?"

    tag:Spidey
     
  9. OBI-BEN-KENOBI

    OBI-BEN-KENOBI Jedi Knight star 6

    Registered:
    Mar 13, 2004
    Darth Vader

    Darth Vader walked to the bridge of the executor as he hummed the song everybody hurts. Whenever he got to the lyric,"sometimes," he chopped off a crew member's hand, and then promoted them, or killed them, depending on thier reaction. He made 70 privates into captains on that walk. Soon he reached the large gray bridge of his ship.As he stepped upon it he was given a full salute.

    "At ease gentlemen. Except for you jimmy, you keep doing that"

    "um, ok sir"

    "Did I say you could talk yet ************?

    "no sir!"

    "Say something else! I dare ya! I double dare ya ************"

    The ensign stayed surprisingly quiet, though he was trembling with fear, but Vader chopped off his head anyway.

    "Captain, save that head, I have a really good practical joke planned"

    The captain just stared at the head for a second, but then he picked it up after he saw Vader's saber was still ignited. He then proceeded to run away screaming.

    "So admiral, are we on our way to naboo yet?"

    "Well sir, we were going to get new window wipers, and chromed sheild generators with hot pink rims but I suppose we could leave without them."

    "Well alright then! Admiral, take us to Naboo!"

    The Executor turned starboardly, and blasted into hyperspace
     
  10. -Lord-Vader-

    -Lord-Vader- Jedi Knight star 5

    Registered:
    Jan 15, 2003
    To speed the story up, Everyone that was going somewhere (ie Vader to Naboo) has just arrived.

    IC as Frodo:


    Frodo was sad that his friend Pot drove away from him with a nuclear typewriter. He was so sad that got into a Ferrari 355 and drove up right next to Pot and his nuclear typewriter. Then he put a brick on the pedal, The Club? on the steering wheel, and a magic gear switching hand on the gear switcher handle thing. Then Frodo took a leap of faith and landed in the seat next to Pot.

    "Hi! I'm Frodo! But you can call me loser! I love you!" Frodo said while hugging Pot.

    After a short while, the loozR got bored and he started playing with the seat adjustment lever.

    "Chair goes up! Chair goes down! Chair goes up! Chair goes down!" He continued to turn the lever like that and say the appropriate words with it.


    Tag: Pot
     
  11. OBI-BEN-KENOBI

    OBI-BEN-KENOBI Jedi Knight star 6

    Registered:
    Mar 13, 2004
    Darth Vader


    The Executor came out of hyperspace just above the green and blue planet of those annoying gungans.

    "Whoa admiral, that was some fast hyperspace travel. I didn't even have time to shower during the trip here."

    "But, sir...wouldn't you be electrocuted if you took a shower?"

    "what are you saying?"

    ".....nevermind. um, do you want to send a team to-"

    Darth Vader interrupts him mid sentence by shouting,"We must go to the surface! I, and a team of elite troopers, will head to the surface to find that damned star map. Ummmm, you, you, and that guy. I will await you in the docking bay. You have 3 hours to prepare."
     
  12. ConcordDawn

    ConcordDawn Jedi Master star 4

    Registered:
    Jun 28, 2004
    IC as Mr. T

    Mr. T was angry. The Chia Pet (c) had been a dud and two insane Rebels had escaped. But he still needed that data. He cooked up a daring plan to infiltrate the base.

    T went over to the local 31 Flavors and ordered a 10-foot hollow ice cream cake with a hinged hatch on top. When the gigantic confection was done, Mr. T slapped it into a shopping cart, climbed into the cake, and rolled himself into the Rebel base's conference center. He jumped out of the cake.

    "Ta da!" Mr. T said and started stripping.

    The Rebel leaders blinked in wonder.

    Then one said, "Ooooo... double fudge..."

    Mr. T gulped as the Rebels ran toward him and he covered his face.

    But it wasn't him they wanted.

    The sugar-starved Rebels, forced to live off moldy Nerf cheese for as long as they could remember, shoved the cake and ice cream into their mouths.

    Mr. T, now wearing only a jock strap, shrugged and plugged his holodisc into the Rebel computer, copying all the information. Then he crept out of the room.

    As he was leaving the Rebel base, he heard "Halt!" behind him. It was a Rebel guard.

    "Wait..." said Mr. T "There must be sumpin' I can do to bribe you..."

    The guard's eyes widened as he looked Mr. T up and down. He licked his lips. "Well... there is this one thing..." The guard winked.

    Mr. T cringed and kneed the guard in the face. "You are helluva sick!" he yelled back as he ran out of the base.
     
  13. BartSimpson-SithLord

    BartSimpson-SithLord Manager Emeritus star 5 VIP - Former Mod/RSA

    Registered:
    Jan 24, 2002
    Strong Sad


    Strong Sad sighed. "Strong Bad, you're not even playing this game. You and the Cheat are planning on tricking the King of Town into stepping into the Poopsmith's pile." he said depressed.

    "Now, Mouse Trap, it's your turn."


    TAG: Strong Bad.

     
  14. -Lord-Vader-

    -Lord-Vader- Jedi Knight star 5

    Registered:
    Jan 15, 2003
    OOC: As of now, This is what I understand is happening:

    Mon Mothma/7-7-7 is still at the Rebel Base/Pots home


    StrongBad/OBI-BEN-KENOBI is playing checkers with Strong Sad/BSSL

    -Lord-Vader-/OBI-BEN-KENOBI is decending upon Naboo to find a Star Map from Winston Churchill

    The Corportate Machine/OBI-BEN-KENOBI is talking with Dr. Weird/Zedd_Vega

    Kit Fisto, Gluupor the Rodian, Master Chief/Zedd-Vega I have no idea what they are doing.

    Ridly/Mortimer Nerdly hasnt posted

    Strong Sad/BartSimpson-Sith Lord Playing checkers

    Winston Churchill/-Lord-Vader- is stuck on his back

    Mr. T, Orange Pack Monster/ConcordDawn are doing something, I cant really figure it out

    Aaron Filonis/Darth_Nemisis with Spiderman on Hoth mabye?

    Ororo Munroe/Vegas_Sith hasnt posted

    Bob Barker/Evil_King_Wiggins is playing his gameshow on the gameshow planet

    Charles Xavier, Spider Man/Evil_King_Wiggins are on Hoth i think

    Darth Bill Gates/Saintheart flying in his space ship mabye?
     
  15. BartSimpson-SithLord

    BartSimpson-SithLord Manager Emeritus star 5 VIP - Former Mod/RSA

    Registered:
    Jan 24, 2002
    OOC: Close, Strong Sad and several other board games are playing the game of Life.



    And -Lord-Vader- approved this:


    Full Name: Homestarrunner
    -Nick Name: Stupid
    --Surname: Um...wat's dat?
    ---Last Name: dot com
    ----Middle Name: Sugarface!
    -----Family Name: FluffyPuffMarshmallows.
    ------Pet Name: Lionel Ritchie.
    -------Alias Name: crapface.
    Homeworld: Homestarrunner.com
    Age: one hundredty
    Sex: um...okay. (male.)
    Species: um...white no arms man.
    Affiliation: homestarrunner, it's dot com.
    Super Power: Incredible stupidity.
    Main Weapon: Stupid talk
    -Secondary Weapon: kicking
    --Third Weapon: Homestarmy
    ---Fourth Weapon: five bucks.
    ----Any other weapon: Marzipan and her guitar.
    Eye color: black
    Hair color: zeroed.
    Skin color: white
    Occupation: um....sports player type person
    Rank: star.
    Bio: http://www.homestarrunner.com/vcr_hs.html
     
  16. 7-7-7

    7-7-7 Jedi Padawan star 4

    Registered:
    Dec 15, 2002
    Mon Mothma walked out of PoT's Place and saw a rather repulsive man wearing a jockstrap.

    "HeeeellO sweet honey of mars! I'm going to get some magic tonight!"

    Mon Mothma walked over to Mr. T and put an arm around his neck. "Hey honey bunny, you looking for a good time?"

    She leaned in close, but then pulled away, "Oh, sick, you smell like onions. What kind of guy are you. You desgust me." She slapped Mr. T and took whatever information holding device he had to make him angry, then ran away.
     
  17. Mortimer_Nerdly

    Mortimer_Nerdly Jedi Master star 5

    Registered:
    Sep 19, 2002
    OOC: Sorry about not posting. I've been real busy on my end. Could someone please tell me where I could jump in?

    []=====#[]<---------------- M_N! ----------------
     
  18. Evil Incarnate

    Evil Incarnate Jedi Grand Master star 6

    Registered:
    Aug 18, 2003
    OOC: Prof. X is on Kashyyyk(sp?) ;)

    Evil.
     
  19. Mortimer_Nerdly

    Mortimer_Nerdly Jedi Master star 5

    Registered:
    Sep 19, 2002
    OOC: I wouldn't know what to do in that case. I don't pay attention to X-Men.

    []=====#[]<---------------- M_N! ----------------
     
  20. Evil Incarnate

    Evil Incarnate Jedi Grand Master star 6

    Registered:
    Aug 18, 2003
    OOC: I was telling -Lord-Vader-! ;)

    IC: Prof. X

    The good professer wheeled around through the Main City of Kashyyyk(sp?) while trying to read wookiee minds... later he found on ewith the same power as him.....

    "....."Can you tell me where the Starmap is?"....."

    "....."Which one?"....."

    "....."What do you mean which one?"....."

    "....."We have many hare at the Starmap Store of Kashyyyk(sp?)"....."

    "....."How much do they cost?"....."

    "....."500 Imperial Credits a peice!"....."

    "....."I'll take them all!"....."

    "....."I'll go get them now!"....."

    TAG: anyone
     
  21. BartSimpson-SithLord

    BartSimpson-SithLord Manager Emeritus star 5 VIP - Former Mod/RSA

    Registered:
    Jan 24, 2002
    Homestar

    Homestar walks into the room with Strong Bad and Strong Sad. "Oh, helwo. Some people person called on the tellophone someday ago. I think they were with someting called a Rebelutionwision. I don't know. It was phunny, guys. I told them about the Trogdoor and they hung up so fast. Anyways..." Homestar then stopped what he was saying and almost froze in place.

    TAG: Strong Bad.
     
  22. OBI-BEN-KENOBI

    OBI-BEN-KENOBI Jedi Knight star 6

    Registered:
    Mar 13, 2004
    Strong Bad

    Strong Bad just kinda stared at Homestar as he stood there with that moronic look on his face.

    "look man, you have to get out of here, so I can finish playing checkers with dingus here...hey, wait a sec. Why the crap am I playing checkers with Strong Sad? Did you put something in my mountain dew again? cuz if you did..."

    Strong bad waved his fist in StrongSad's general direction

    "Outta my way loser," said Strong Bad as he walked out of Strong Sad's room to go take a nap on the couch.

    TAG: Homestar, SS
     
  23. ConcordDawn

    ConcordDawn Jedi Master star 4

    Registered:
    Jun 28, 2004
    OOC:

    Mr. T, Orange Pack Monster/ConcordDawn are doing something, I cant really figure it out

    Mr. T just downloaded the Rebel database onto a holodisc from the main Rebel base, which Mon Mothma just stole, and Orange Pac Monster is sitting in his starship over Corellia.

     
  24. ConcordDawn

    ConcordDawn Jedi Master star 4

    Registered:
    Jun 28, 2004
    I pity the fool who isn't IC as Mr. T

    Mr. T swore silently. Dangit! I knew I shouldn't have ordered Double Fudge Onion cake! He popped some Tic-Tacs into his mouth to take care of the breath.

    He ducked into a nearby storage closet and found the empty shell of a red 3PO droid. Hot diggity! This is perfect!

    Mr.T climbed inside and strapped on the pieces until, finally, he looked exactly like a very fat, red protocol droid.

    He waddled out of the closet after Mon Mothma, determined to get the disc back.

    When he found her, he did his best imitation of a protocol droid voice.

    "Hello... uh.... sir. Er, I mean madam. Can I, eh... take that holodisc from you?"

    He reached for the disc...
     
  25. Mortimer_Nerdly

    Mortimer_Nerdly Jedi Master star 5

    Registered:
    Sep 19, 2002
    IC: Ridley

    • After escaping the destruction of Zebes, Ridley proceeded to Earth. He streaked into the atmosphere with his boxed-up Metroid and looked for a place to land.


    • The choice fell upon a structure in the middle of nowhere. Ridley perched himself on the roof. This random structure happened to be Strong Bad's house.


    TAG: OBI-BEN-KENOBI

    [image=http://www.classicgaming.com/mdb/sm/smart_ridley01.jpg]


    []=====#[]<---------------- M_N! ----------------
     
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