Beyond - Legends Lost Without You (J/Z, Tahiri) angsty two parter. J/Z Blue Ghosties challenge-Replies 6/29/07!

Title: Lost Without You
Author: brodiew
Timeframe: LOTF ERA AU
Characters: Jaina, Zekk, Tahiri
Disclaimer: This is all George's jungle.
Summary: Zekk mourns only days after Jaina's death in his arms.
Author note: This is a response to the First Love, Last Love October Challenge: Blue Ghosties .

A muddy river bank?

A tired tree that loomed over rushing water?

A quiet moment between lovers?

Death?

Zekk stared at his image in the mirror and had no energy left to be horrified. His green eyes drooped in agreement with the frown that hung on his face. His eyes were glassy and bloodshot, his black hair was unkempt, and he had not bathed or changed his clothes in three days. Three days. 72 hours. 4320 minutes. 259, 200 seconds. He blinked and a tear raced down each cheek. He wanted to let go, to cry angry tears, but there had been enough of that, already. Or, had there?

He dropped to his knees in front of the sink and started to sob. He shook, uncontrollably, for a few seconds, but stopped when he saw the brown streaks of dirt on the thighs of his black pants. He sucked in an uneasy breath, as the crying had plugged his nose. He touched the spots on each thigh, careful not to stroke them and brush the dirt away. They were not mere streaks, but the vaguest outline of hand prints. Her hand prints.

His love, Jaina Solo, died three days ago and he had been helpless to save her. She might as well have died in his arms. He might as well have killed her, because the choice he had to make made him feel just as sick. He suppressed a heightened feeling of nausea.

Suddenly, as in a vision, he saw her arm wrapped tightly around his leg, the fierce look of defiance set on her face. Her brown eyes blazed in fury as she wildly sliced and chopped her violet blade into the water, willing the creature, whose tentacle gripped her legs, to die. The creature jerked, and her hand slipped down his leg, holding tightly to his calf. Another tentacle shot from the water and landed hard against her chest. She winced in pain, as her lightsaber fell into the water. She was dazed, but did not let go of his leg. She lunged back toward him and her hand landed on his left leg, grabbing at the fabric of his pants. She looked into his eyes. The ferocious look was gone, replaced by a playful acceptance of her fate. ?I love you,? she said with a mischievous smile. She winked, and was gone.

Another wave of tears attacked and he leaned against the outer edge of his shower stall.

******

He awoke some time later, to a familiar Force nudge in his mind. Blinking to clear his vision, he sat up, and placed a hand on the wall to steady himself. He stood just in time to recognize the Force presence and see her bursting into his refresher.

?Zekk!? she shouted, seeing him falter as he stood. ?Are you ok??

He covered his ears in a belated reaction. He was pleased to see her. She had been off planet on a mission when he had returned to the Temple. He saw the anguish in her green eyes, and felt her need to connect with someone in grief.

?I?m fine Tahiri,? he said, opening his arms to her.

?I don?t believe it,? she said through trembling lips. ?This is too much.?

Disregarding his dirty robes, Tahiri stepped into a deep hug. They stood there in the middle of his ?fresher for almost two minutes. Neither spoke.

?You stink,? she said, finally breaking the hug and wrinkling her nose.

?I know,? he replied, trying a smile. ?I can?t bring myself to change. I don?t want to shower. I don?t want to do anything, really.?

?I understand...completely.?

She stood there, awkwardly touching her ear, and pushed some loose blonde tresses behind it.

?I know that, too, Tahiri. I?none of us will ever forget.?

?I wasn?t trying to make this about me,? she replied, mildly irritated by his response.

?Tahiri, please,? he said, mystified and further saddened by her comment. ?That?s nowhere near what I meant.?

Tahiri blushed

 

J....J....Jaina???? NOOOOOOOOO!

Poor Zekk, that was a great post, good of Tahiri to come and make sure that he was ok.... or poor Zekk and i don't even like him.... Beautifuly written fic

PHGS Weyr

 

?You are one sorry excuse for a Jedi, my friend.?

He looked up in shock at the voice and shot to his feet as soon as he saw the shimmering apparition of his love.

?Jaina!?

?In the flesh, so to speak.?

Bravo!

 

Poor Zek! I feel for him having to deal with the guilt and grief.

I guess I'm kind of twisted, but I actually laughed when Jaina's ghost appeared...

"You're one sorry excuse for a Jedi, my friend."

That was so spot on for Jaina. Great job.

 

Zekk stared at his image in the mirror and had no energy left to be horrified. His green eyes drooped in agreement with the frown that hung on his face. His eyes were glassy and bloodshot, his black hair was unkempt, and he had not bathed or changed his clothes in three days. Three days. 72 hours. 4320 minutes. 259, 200 seconds. He blinked and a tear raced down each cheek. He wanted to let go, to cry angry tears, but there had been enough of that, already. Or, had there?

He dropped to his knees in front of the sink and started to sob. He shook, uncontrollably, for a few seconds, but stopped when he saw the brown streaks of dirt on the thighs of his black pants. He sucked in an uneasy breath, as the crying had plugged his nose. He touched the spots on each thigh, careful not to stroke them and brush the dirt away. They were not mere streaks, but the vaguest outline of hand prints. Her hand prints.




I just had to get that out of my system.

I have to say that Zekk's counting out all the measures of time that had passed and the handprints on his trousers that he wasn't willing to let go of, was beautiful writing there brodiew.

I like how you fit Tahiri into this. Of course she's the one who would understand most of what he lost. Hopefully she can help him through it, if ghostly Jaina doesn't get through to him. Somehow though I think she came back to do just that and won't leave until the job is done.

Can't wait for part II....

 

PHGS_Weyr: Thank you for reading, Weyr. I¡¦m glad that, though you don¡¦t like him, I made you feel something for Zekk. ?º

VaderLVR64: Thanks for reading, Kim.

Alexis_Wingstar: Thanks, Alexis. Her appearance was supposed to break the angsty ice, but it may yet be choppy waters.

Lola64: Thanks you, Dawn. I¡¦m glad the numbering worked. I wanted Zekk¡¦s desperation at Jaina¡¦s loss to come through. As far as Tahiri, she may have something to say about that.

 

Well this is intense! Lovely descriptions, great job with the emotions! Loving it so far!

 

?You stink,? she said, finally breaking the hug and wrinkling her nose.


Tahiri sighed in resignation. She stood and approached Zekk. His head was down, so she reached a hand out to his chin and lifted it gently. Their eyes met, green to green.
?I know your pain, Zekk. Let me know when you are ready to talk.?
Nice image- I can really see the two of them sharing such grief, but not really knowing how to actually share it.

?You are one sorry excuse for a Jedi, my friend.?
*snorts* Sounds like Jaina.

I like the emotion you put into it- Zekk's angst was very real, as was Tahiri's-just not on that deeper level like Zekk's. I have to say, Jaina's reappearance almost made me laugh.
So much for her being completely gone. Zekk has to deal with her yet.

 

Suddenly, as in a vision, he saw her arm wrapped tightly around his leg, the fierce look of defiance set on her face. Her brown eyes blazed in fury as she wildly sliced and chopped her violet blade into the water, willing the creature, whose tentacle gripped her legs, to die. The creature jerked, and her hand slipped down his leg, holding tightly to his calf. Another tentacle shot from the water and landed hard against her chest. She winced in pain, as her lightsaber fell into the water. She was dazed, but did not let go of his leg. She lunged back toward him and her hand landed on his left leg, grabbing at the fabric of his pants. She looked into his eyes. The ferocious look was gone, replaced by a playful acceptance of her fate. ?I love you,? she said with a mischievous smile. She winked, and was gone.

I want the full on story of how Jaina died complete with all the details. You know the attention to details that women want.

 

You really made me feel for Zekk here. I loved that he won't wash his clothes because they're the last thing Jaina touched, and the way she died really got me. I can see her doing that. I also loved the scene with Zekk and Tahiri awkwardly trying to help each other deal with their grief.

Well-done, and I'm looking forward to Part 2!

 

Aw, so sad. But at least Tahiri and Zekk have each other to help through the crisis.

 

I want to hug Zekk, but at the same time, there's this: ?You are one sorry excuse for a Jedi, my friend.?

Jaina. Is. Awesome.

Zekk!Angst is lovely, though, and at least he has someone to talk to, now, in Tahiri (well, as long as he bathes, at least! )

 

Wow. This is sad. Still you capture the raw emotion very well. Also, I like the way Tahiri is there trying to comfort Zekk. It really has a brother-sister vibe there, and in my opinion, that's the kind of relationship that Zekk and Tahiri would have.

In this story, it's also kind of sadly ironic. They both loved a Solo who died, and now they have to lean on each other. It's very sweet. Neither of them had a family, but they treat each other like siblings.

You did a wonderful job my friend. I eagerly await Part 2.

 

Zekk angst, empathetic Tahiri and sarcastic blue ghostie Jaina - what more does one want in a fanfic?


Can you tell I enjoyed it? *grin* I'm looking forward to part two - thanks for the PM on this one!

 

Very sad. You can see how Zekk would let Jaina's death completely destroy him and become nonfunctioning unless someone interevnes early and let's him know that life does in fact go on. Enter Tahiri. Tahiri's characterization was excellent, and,yes, Jaina's line at the end made me smile a bit.

 

Dude,

I have an ongoing dislike (not hate, but dislike) for Zekk. But then you go and write this nice little fanfic and make me feel sorry for him. It worked, for a slight moment, I liked Zekk. But the moment has passed and I will continue to be a J/J fan.

At least until the next post.